Chapter Text
Grace has been having more and more nightmares lately. Why? He should be excited, the final preparations were being made for him to move to his new body! This was a good, happy time. So why is his brain being so terrible?
Rocky knew much about Grace's nightmares and how they worked from their extensive time on the Hail Mary. He'd had a lot of nightmares then, too, as his body and mind degraded beyond recognition. There, he'd have dreams that forced him to relive what happened to him back on Earth. What Evi-, pardon, Eva Stratt did to him and his friend Carl simply watching it all happen without any care in the world. It had taken a long time to get Grace to tell Rocky that thats what the nightmares were about.
After all, Rocky didn't know Grace didn't volunteer to be on that mission. And Grace had never wanted to tell him.
-
Grace was lying on his mattress, which sat on the floor of the Hail Mary pressed against Rocky's xenonite barrier. He said the heat it gave off helped, yet it never seemed to be enough. Grace was so frail. Startlingly so. And that made him cold all the time.
His bones were clearer to Rocky's echolocation than ever before. They practically protruded straight out of his skin, which had also thinned dramatically. Speaking of his skin, it was covered in bruises. And the worst part? The burn scars Rocky's atmosphere left on Grace's neck and right arm, as well as the claw-shaped burn, had split open a couple weeks ago now. They bled sporadically, no true indication on when it would stop or start. It would just happen. Grace's nose bled constantly, too.
In short, Grace was dying. And all Rocky could do was sit behind this stupid xenonite wall and watch. Grace was barely ever awake these days, which provided Rocky much time to design a new xenonite suit that he could use instead of his ball, one that was more tight to his carapace for freer movement. Despite all that time, though, Rocky had barely got anything done. Most of his time when Grace was asleep Rocky spent huddled as close to the barrier as possible, singing to him in hopes that it would comfort him. He would watch every movement his human's body made, taking note of even the most subtle, perhaps inconsequential changes and forwarding them to Armando's first aid system.
Unfortunately, though, the response never changed. Mary insisted the best option was a coma, but with how afraid Grace had looked the first time she suggested it, Rocky would never dare entertain such an idea. So this was the best he could do. It was fucking miserable.
At least when Grace was asleep he couldn't see Rocky cry. He needed to be strong for his Grace. So he stayed strong, kept working when he could, forced Grace to eat the Taomoeba slurry he'd made in small portions when he was awake, and sang until his vocal systems begged him to stop.
It was heartbreakingly familiar to the Blip-A. This wouldn't, no, couldn't end like that. Grace would make it no matter what, Rocky would make sure of it. How exactly he did not know, but his Grace would not die, not here and not ever. He couldn't.
Ever since Grace arrived back at the Blip-A after the Taumoeba xenonite leak that should've been the thing to sign Rocky's death certificate, Rocky looked at him differently. Grace saved him. He gave up his chance to ever see Earth again for him. For Rocky and Erid. While this realization devastated Rocky at first, especially when Grace finally opened up to him about the food situation, it soon shifted to resemble something akin to infatuation. Devotion, even. Grace had given up his life to save Rocky so Rocky would do the same and more. He would give Grace the life Earth denied him time and time again.
And if he was lucky, Grace could be his mate one day.
Of course, he wouldn't ever even whisper of such a thing now. Not with Grace in the condition he's in. And definitely not with how afraid Rocky himself was to say it out loud. It could ruin everything. Feelings of this nature are a fragile yet dangerous thing; they can either grant you the world or rip away entirely.
So his focus was solely on ensuring Grace survived for now. And if the song he sang to Grace nearly every night was the same song he and Adrian used to court each other? That was nothing Grace need concern himself with.
Hopefully Adrian wouldn't mind. It wasn't Rocky's fault it just so happened to be sung in pitches that seemed to soothe Grace!
Thats what Rocky was doing now. His xenonite manipulators were worn around his claws to allow him to build the prototype EVA suit he was supposed to be working on, however they went unused and the xenonite before him went untouched. Rocky instead remained pressed against the xenonite where he sang quiet enough to not wake Grace but loud enough to be present.
Thats when the nightmare began.
His vents snapped shut the instant he recognized the telltale signs of an incoming nightmare. Or rather the physical side effects of one occurring. First, Grace's heart rate spiked. Following in turn, his breathing became quicker and his weak muscles tensed. Perspiration gathered on his skin rather quickly as the symptoms grew more intense.
But Rocky simply watched. Grace had warned him to not wake him up during a nightmare, as it may lead to him becoming more afraid and hurting himself. So he remained where he was and pressed a claw to the wall, his best effort at the comforting gentle touches he read humans gave one another during moments like these. Holding hands, it was called.
Usually the nightmares would be over within a few minutes and would be relatively uneventful aside from Grace sometimes thrashing aggressively during them. The first time those convulsions caused him to fall out of bed, they made the executive decision to move Grace's mattress to the floor. Or rather, Rocky yelled at Grace to do it. Grace was annoyingly insistent on acting like he was fine when he clearly wasn't. The bruises down his side told the story he wasn't willing to accept.
Never had Grace spoken during a nightmare before. So when he did that night, it startled Rocky, who had not realized this was a thing that could happen. Humans weren't supposed to make word sounds when sleeping.
It started as incoherent mumbling. It was so quiet that if you didn't have the fine tuned hearing of an Eridian it would surely be lost beneath the ambient noise of the Hail Mary.
Then Grace screamed.
And so did Rocky, jumping back away from the barrier before scuttling back over immediately. It was a gut wrenching sound, followed by much more rapid breathing and more intense perspiration on his skin. Grace's eyes were moving beneath his still-closed eyelids frantically.
"No.." he mumbled. "You can't do this."
Rocky froze. "Grace? Grace awake, question?" He tapped the glass frantically. He didn't care about the "don't wake me up" rule right now, whatever this was had gone too far for Rocky's comfort. Grace was speaking as though he were cornered by an unseen predator despite being fast asleep. It was terrifying.
"Grace? Grace, answer Rocky, please." His tapping grew more frantic as Grace suddenly thrashed, his blanket flinging off his upper body.
"No, no, NO." He screamed again.
"Rocky is here, Grace is safe," Rocky warbled out. What could he even do? Grace didn't seem to be able to hear him and unfortunately sound was the only thing he could use to wake him. "Grace is brave, very brave. Grace wake up now, statement."
"YOU'RE MURDERING ME."
Rocky's mercurial blood froze. His whole carapace felt rooted in place as confusion and fear consumed him. Murder? Why would Grace say murder? He is safe, he is with Rocky.
A sickening feeling gathered in Rocky's gut as Grace continued to sob and mumble incoherent words. All he'd managed to get Grace to say about these night terrors was that they were all about a traumatic event back on Earth. With that information, Rocky came to a terrifying conclusion:
Someone had tried to kill Grace. Or at the very least threatened to.
Why? Why would anyone want to kill his Grace, the kindest and bravest human on that whole damned planet? He had even gone to space to save them, no one loved Earth more than Grace. Where his blood had gone cold before, it now ran hot with anger.
'Who,' was all he could think. 'Who hurt my Grace.'
He wouldn't need to wonder for long. Grace suddenly sprung up from the mattress, chest heaving beneath a shaky hand that clung to his shirt for dear life. His eyes were wide and frantic, sweat dripping from his forehead as if he had just run a mile. His heart was beating at around 178 bpm, though it was thankfully slowing. Gradually, but it was better than nothing.
"Grace?" Rocky spoke carefully, lifting his claw back up to the xenonite. Grace's head whipped around to face him with such force that Rocky had to resist the urge to flinch away again. "Grace okay, question? Nightmare different than normal, what happen, question?" Grace didn't respond, body falling into an uncontrollable shudder as the flow of tears intensified. He choked on his on breath, sobbing as his arms moved to hug himself.
'I should be there, I should be hugging him. Useless, useless, useless.'
Rocky moved to press his whole carapace against the wall as Grace collapsed against it. He allowed his song to reverberate through his vents once more, along with the occasional comforting word.
"It is okay, Rocky is here," he sang softly. "Grace is safe. Grace is brave. Brave brave brave-"
"No I'm not." It was a quiet interjection, hardly loud enough to constitute a proper response. Rocky made a confused clicking sound.
"What mean, not brave? Grace very brave."
"No I'm not, bud. I'm a ———." Now this was interesting. Grace had many times before sold himself short and refused to admit just how brave or skilled he truly was, but never had he called himself that.
"New word."
Grace's breath shuddered again. " It means a person whose not brave. You run from danger or fear or literally anything that scares you, even if its selfish." He said the last part with a particularly bitter bite to his words. "I am a coward."
"Why would Grace say that?" Rocky shouted. "Is this about nightmare, question?"
"Its not important Rock, I'll get over it. I just need to sl-"
"NO." Rocky roared, his notes so loud that Grace startled away from the xenonite with wide eyes. "Is VERY important! Grace said things in sleep, bad bad bad things, Rocky is scared. Grace need to explain."
Grace seemed to stare right through him as the tears only continued to fall. Only then did Rocky realize how harsh such a demand was.
"Rocky cannot fix if Grace does not talk. Rocky want to help."
"You can't fix this," Grace mumbled.
"Can make hurt less," he argued back. Grace scooted back over to the wall, pressing his back against where Rocky's pressed on the other side with a sigh.
"I don't really want to talk about it." Grace looked up at the ceiling, blinking rapidly as if to clear his eyes of the tears. Rocky wished he could wipe them away himself. "Really, its-" Grace stilled mid sentence.
"..Grace?"
"What did I say?" His voice trembled but was undoubtedly serious. "You said I said something while I was sleeping and it was bad. What did I say?"
Rocky fidgeted with his claws as he formulated his next words. He could still hear that scream echoing through his mind, the terror in Grace's voice when he said what he said.
'YOU'RE MURDERING ME'
"Grace scream, very very loud. Then say 'no' a lot. Many times." Rocky shuddered. "You yelled that someone was murdering you." Grace's breath caught. His heart may as well have stopped entirely with how stone still he became.
"Grace."
Grace did not respond.
"Please talk to me. Request."
Still no movement from the opposite side of the barrier.
"Who tried to murder Grace?" This finally got a reaction in the form of a stuttered breath and clammy hands grasping his biceps tighter. The room went quiet for some time after that, the only sound coming from either of them being Grace's quieting sobs and the occasional hiss of Rocky's vents. That was fine. Rocky had spoken enough, he needed to wait for Grace to catch up now.
"I didn't volunteer for this mission Rocky."
He trilled in confusion. "What do you mean you not volunteer, question?"
"I said no. I said I wouldn't go because I didn't want to die. I was a coward." Grace's hands moved to hug his knees to his chest. "I was their only choice and I said no."
"How Grace end up on ship if Grace said no, question?" The unsettled feeling in Rocky's gut only grew more nauseating. He had a feeling he knew the answer, there was only one that made sense, but he didn't want to believe it. How could one be so cruel? So selfish and heartless? Such a disregard for life.
"I ran. They chased me." That certainly explained the strange behavior he exhibited during his night terrors, what Rocky had equated to something akin to a prey response. Grace had genuinely been hunted down like a prey creature. "Stratt told them to inject me with sedatives to knock me out and I was loaded onto the ship like that."
"They gave me the coma drugs they gave Yao and Ilyukhina, but they also gave me amnesia drugs so I wouldn't remember what they did until it was too late to turn around." Grace's breaths grew rapid again. "I'm not who you thought I was Rocky, I'm sorry. I'm selfish, I'm cruel and I put myself above billions of people knowing I was sentencing them to death. I- I'm not a good person."
"Why."
Grace finally turned, looking over his shoulder and into Rocky's side of the ship. "What?"
Rocky slipped away from the wall and began to pace angrily before turning back to Grace and stomping a claw on the ground. "Why did they force Grace to go? Grace said no! Why you have to come, question???"
"We had two science specialists." Grace trembled as he turned his whole body to face Rocky's yet again pacing form. "Their names were DuBois and Shapiro. I trained them on everything they'd need to know about astrophage for the mission."
"They both died in an accident within less than a week of launch day and we couldn't afford to push the mission back to find someone new." He looked away as Rocky stilled and watched carefully. "So Stratt chose me. Actually, she'd chosen me the whole time, I was the tertiary science specialist all along and I had no idea. Nobody did, but still. Not like she actually expected to need me, but she did and she didn't hesitate to."
"She gave me 3 hours to think it over, except now I realize that was just 3 hours for her to figure out how to get me on there without the rest of the crew finding out I had been forced. She knew I was going to say no, 3 hours wasn't enough to change that."
Rocky's growling filled the space almost instantly. "Stratt killed Grace."
His friend's eyes widened in horror, waving his hands in a dispelling gesture. "No, no Rocky you have it all wrong-"
"Evil Stratt killed Grace!!! Statement!!!" He cried out. "Grace said no!!! Should not have been on mission, should be on Earth safe!" His carapace made creaking sounds as he trembled. It was impossible to stand still like this. There was too much anger flooding through him to possibly stand still. He needed to break something, but if he did he'd scare Grace.
Grace.
Grace thought Rocky would think less of him for this. His Grace thought Rocky would hate him. He needed to fix that.
"Grace should not have been here," Rocky began carefully, drawing closer to the barrier slowly. He raised a claw and pressed it to the smooth surface separating them as Grace watched with a conflicted expression. "But Grace was brave. So brave. Grace saved Earth and saved Erid and saved Rocky even though you were scared."
"That is not what a coward would do."
Grace shook his head as another tear fell. He didn't bother to wipe it away. "I didn't remember. I thought I volunteered, Rocky. I thought I was brave."
"So you became brave. You may not have been brave on Earth, but Grace brave on Hail Mary," Rocky declared. "A coward would not have turned back for Rocky. A coward would not have done EVA in gravity while ship fall through Adrian's atmosphere. A coward would not have worked with a scary space monster. Does not matter who Grace was, you are not a coward now." He made sure to stomp his claw on the ground multiple times for emphasis. Rocky's way of saying 'I have made up my mind and there is no changing it'.
Grace's face shifts in a lot of strange ways, especially when he is upset. His mouth formed an uneven frown shape all while his lips wobbled uncontrollably and his heavy-lidded eyes gave way beneath the onslaught of new tears. He made a loud nasally sound called 'sniffling' before collapsing against the barrier again. His arms snaked along the xenonite wall awkwardly resembling a hug. Rocky returned the gesture immediately.
"Wha' did I do to deserve you," Grace sniffled with his face pressed against the xenonite. His cheek squished in such an interesting way as he did. Rocky selfishly wanted to squeeze them. "I don' deserve thss." Rocky cooed back at him comfortingly.
"Grace did not need to earn Rocky's affection. Grace as Grace is enough for Rocky." Grace choked up again, tears smearing against the barrier.
They remained there for a long time. The silence was comforting, it was easy. Silence in the way that they weren't speaking, anyway. The empty space was filled once more with Rocky's song, which continued long after Grace had fallen back asleep.
All Rocky felt was anger. Pure, unfiltered anger. If he didn't need to remain quiet for Grace to sleep, he no doubt would've had his way with some of the more breakable objects on his side of the ship. He understood why that human, Stratt, did what she did. There were over 7 billion people on Earth according to Grace. 1 life versus 7 billion wasn't even a fair choice, of course the 1 would lose. But why? Why did it have to be his Grace? Why did they have to subject him to all of this hurt, all of this pain?
Why did they have to take away his precious memories? The concept of forgetting was one Eridians were terrified of, to say the least. They had perfect, photographic memory. Once they were presented with information once, they would not forget it. Thats not to say they don't make mistakes or can't still just suck at understanding certain concepts, but their inability to forget information is far superior to a human's. Memory was precious, it was everything. It contained not just learned information but your entire being. Your understanding of who you are.
Only the most elder Eridians would suffer memory loss typically, and even then it was incredibly rare. Even then, they'd never forget everything, at least Rocky didn't think they did. They'd remember their family, their mates, themself, but maybe forget certain information or events from the long gone past. Usually beginning with pebblehood.
To intentionally cause such a thing…
Rocky shuddered with rage at the mere thought. Such a thing would no doubt be a crime of the highest order back home, surely it was on Earth too right? Then why did they do it? Did they not care?
Did they not care about Grace?
His thoughts were conflicting and cluttered. Too many possibilities, too much he didn't know. All Rocky knew for sure now is that, despite Grace being here unwillingly, he was still the bravest person Rocky had ever met, human or otherwise.
And Rocky would do anything to make sure no one ever threatened his Grace again, even if it meant defying death itself. He didn't care, he would do it. Rocky would protect Grace until his vents shuddered out their final breath.
He would give anything to protect Grace forever. Its what Grace deserved.
-
Grace's nightmares now were different. He didn't say they were, but Rocky could just tell. The timing added to Rocky's suspicion of what exactly the nightmares were about now, and he didn't like it.
Grace was scared. No, he was terrified. Of what exactly Rocky was not sure yet. Whether it be the transfer, death, Erid, multiple of those things or all of the above, Grace was undoubtedly troubled by something in that area.
He decided to take his concerns to Adrian. His beautiful Adrian would surely know what to do.
"-and I don't know what to do! His nightmares have improved so much since recovering from space! Why are they coming back now? Question?" Rocky paced back and forth across him and Adrian's nesting room with agitated steps. "Is it the Project? Does he not want to do it anymore? Or is it-"
Adrian cut him off by lifting their claw into the air. Rocky paused his pacing and turned his attention to them where they sat within the plushness of their nest. They looked incredibly comfortable with arms tucked nicely beneath their large carapace and snuggled in as they were.
"Rocky, love, sit please," Adrian sang softly. "You are mussing the bedding." He obliged instantly, earning him an approving purr from his mate that he returned with one of his own.
"My love, of course our Grace is afraid. The path ahead of him is uncertain to even the most skilled scientists our world has to offer."
"But shouldn't he be happy?" Rocky countered. "He's going to live, Adrian! Earth stole his life from him and now he is getting it back!"
"No, Rocky," Adrian sighed. "Grace might-"
"Will."
"Might live," Adrian spoke firmer this time. Rocky knew they did not like to be interrupted when they spoke, but his passion seemed to get the better of him. He shrunk in on himself a little as his mate continued. "Rocky, we do not know if Grace will live. Even if he makes the transfer, it may still fail. This is untested science, you know just as well as anyone how important trials are in something as delicate as this."
"But even if Grace does live, have you considered how daunting this is, question? He will need to not only learn how to control and speak with a new body but also the customs and social norms of a society unrecognizable to his own."
"But we would help him!" Rocky insisted. They would help Grace, he wouldn't be alone! Not like he was on Earth, nor the Hail Mary. He would be among family and he was a quick learner, he'd be just fine.
"Of course we would love, but it will still be a difficult process. He has every right to be afraid of either possibility here." They shifted their large carapace closer to Rocky's much smaller one, wrapping an arm around him. "I do not understand how the human mind processes fear as much as you likely do, but I believe the type of fear he is feeling is universal. Our Grace deserves patience and love throughout this whole process, especially because it may be the last time we can love him." Rocky clinked his carapace against Adrian's with a shaky note.
"You must accept this, my love. I know how much you love Grace, I love him too, but you must accept his fear and understand that he is valid in what he feels."
'But I want to fix it,' Rocky thought as his mind raced. 'I can fix it. I can protect him. I have to.'
As if his mate could hear his thoughts, they echoed them in a low, rumbly hum. "Some things you just cannot fix. All you can do is trust the work you have done and trust Grace's body to do the rest. That is all you can do."
Rocky shook and his words slipped out before he could stop them. "All I know how to do is fix. What am I if I cannot fix things? Question?"
Adrian didn't miss a beat. "You are Rocky, savior of Erid and Earth, mate to Adrian and friend of savior Grace. You are Rocky, the leading space sciences engineer and xenonite specialist in this region. You are kind, protective, and never not there when you are needed most. That is who you are, my love. You are a shining light in the darkness, a diamond in the rough." They pet the top of his carapace lovingly. "Grace knows how hard you have worked and he loves you so dearly for it. If anything, he would rather you work less, he hates to see you working yourself so thin."
"He is doing this for you, you know." Rocky perked up and Adrian simply continued their petting.
"What do you mean, question? How is accepting the new body we made him for me? It is for my Grace, not for me," Rocky insisted. "This is for him."
"Yes, but remember how afraid Grace was when you first presented the project?"
Adrian chittered at the grumble Rocky let out in response. "It wasn't my finest moment."
"Yes, but thats not entirely why he was afraid. Agreeing to such a thing meant agreeing to something uncertain and downright terrifying to him. But he did it for you; every decision he has made regarding this project has been because he doesn't want you to be hurt."
Rocky took a moment to think that over. Could that really be why Grace agreed? Is that truly the reason? Has he been quietly terrified this whole time but not said a word to spare Rocky the pain of it? The more he pondered it, the more sense it made.
Grace had always been selfless to a fault. He may not agree with that sentiment, but Rocky believed it to be the uncontested truth.
After Grace told Rocky the truth of what happened to him that resulted in him being on the mission, he began revealing more little things about the project as a whole. Project Hail Mary, it had been called. Grace had been sought out due to his widely frowned upon paper that insisted water was not essential for life.
"There is nothing magic about oxygen and hydrogen," he'd argued as he explained. Rocky could hear Grace as clearly as if it were yesterday.
Astrophage, which apparently Grace was the one to give it its name in a split second decision, fit into what looked like a potential non-water-reliant life form. Of course, this was quickly proven to be false.
"But astrophage is carbon, hydrogen, and oxygen. Why Grace still on project, question?"
"Yeah, bud, I'm getting to that."
This conclusion meant Grace was no longer needed according to Eva Stratt. He'd said little of her before, just that she was in charge of the Petrova Taskforce and, in turn, Project Hail Mary. This was the first Rocky learned of her legal immunity in nearly every country on the planet, but that story is for another day.
'I chased after her and said, 'are you guys really leaving?' and she said they didn't need me anymore. I was the one that begged to stay. I think she hoped I would but just assumed I wouldn't."
"So why did Grace stay, question?"
"For my kids. I had so much I could give to this project, you know surely I could help in some way even if I definitely wasn't the most qualified at the time. If I could protect them from ever living in the frozen wasteland that Earth was doomed to become if Project Hail Mary failed, I wanted to."
He'd been fully uprooted from his classroom and home upon discovering how Astrophage breed and deposited on a boat in the middle of the ocean for an indefinite amount of time. He'd done so without argument. Grace gladly left everything behind on a whim to protect those kids, putting up with what Rocky considered to be unfair treatment.
Rocky never understood why Grace believed he was a coward. A coward would not give up everything for children that weren't even his own. And now, Rocky wanted to give Grace everything he had given everyone else. He wanted his Grace to be the one being helped for once.
But maybe that was the problem.
Rocky was selfish. He had constructed this entire project in secret. Everyone involved had to swear they would not say a word of it to Grace. He'd told himself it was because it was a surprise. It would be the best gift Rocky could ever give him. But he had never considered that Grace wouldn't like the idea, that maybe he would feel pressured into it.
A quiet part of Rocky had always known Grace would have probably said no to the idea. In a way he had, but without knowing Rocky intended to actually attempt it. But if Grace said no he would certainly die and that was a possibility Rocky wouldn't allow.
And maybe it was wrong, but Rocky still didn't want to think about what it meant if Grace went back on his agreement.
That was exactly the problem.
He wasn't considering what Grace wanted. Just like Stratt, and Carl, and everyone else on Earth who hadn't seen Grace as anything beyond a tool. Even though his intentions were good, he had still gone behind Grace's back, just as they had. No wonder he was afraid.
Rocky felt sick.
"Adrian.. this is my fault," he cried. When did he start crying? He'd been so lost in his own mind that he didn't even notice as he began to shake. "I'm just as bad as Eva Stratt."
"No, you are not," Adrian cooed softly. "You want to help Grace but you allowed yourself to be blinded by your own wants." They were still stroking the top of his carapace, a comfort amidst his current turmoil. "This project has always been more about your fear of losing Grace then it was about Grace himself. But that doesn't mean you are bad, you wanted to help."
"I shut him out."
"Yes," they agreed. "You did. We all did."
"Why? Why did you not tell him if you knew this, question?" Rocky grabbed at the bedding and fussed with it to give him something to focus on that wasn't his racing mind.
"Because I am loyal to you first, my love," Adrian replied simply. "My mate comes before anyone else, even Grace. And this was important to you, so it was important to me as well. But as your mate it is important that I tell you all of this, and honestly I should've much sooner." For the first time throughout this entire conversation, Adrian sounded guilty. "I apologize, Rocky. I have also fallen short here."
There were so many things Rocky wanted to say, but he knew none of them would matter. Only one thing really did now.
"What do we do, my Adrian?" Rocky whispered shakily, his vents clicking together in strange ways due to his shaking. "How do I fix this, question?" They hummed but said nothing for a moment.
"I love him, Adrian, I love him so much I don't know what to do with it," he blurted out. "I still can't lose him, I don't want to scrap the project. I want him to live, I don't ever want to lose him Adrian, I can't-"
"What we do now is up to Grace and Grace alone." They rumbled softly. "It was always to be up to him, and that does not change now." They stroked a claw along the front of his carapace lovingly as they spoke. "Apologize to him. Tell him you will love him no matter what he chooses to do, even if that means foregoing the project entirely."
"But-"
"Rocky, if you want to make up for your secrecy and hiding from him, you must be honest with him and accept whatever he wants wholeheartedly. You are allowed to be upset, but if you don't want him to feel forced, this is what you must do."
"Give him control back."
-
4 weeks remaining
Rocky showed up at Grace's house much earlier than normal. In fact, he was there so early that the biodome lights hadn't even begun to simulate sunrise yet. Grace himself was still fast asleep, tucked nicely into the fetal position much to Rocky's displeasure.
"GRACE!!" Rocky's voice echoed throughout the room and instantly startled Grace awake, wincing as his back straightened. "Bad! Grace know you should not sleep with spine curled!! Bad bad bad!!!" Grace rolled onto his back with a groan, dragging his hands down his face. Rocky only continued to lecture him.
"Spine going to fuse and not uncurl and-"
"Rocky," his friend finally stopped. "One, that won't happen. And two, why in God's name are you here this fudging early. The lights aren't even on yet man." Rocky climbed up onto the bed and spread Grace's legs far enough for him to fit into the space between his ankles.
"I have news," he chirped happily.
"And it couldn't wait until, oh I don't know, not this ridiculously early?" Grace groaned again. "Dude seriously I barely slept."
"Apology," Rocky said quietly. "Needed night home with Adrian. Important." Grace waved him off with a quick 'its fine'. He knew Rocky hated leaving him to sleep alone and he didn't mean to make him feel guilty about it. Rocky was busy, its fine.
"News!" Rocky exclaimed again, waving his hands excitedly. "Scientists deliver news, Grace's brain studies were very very very helpful and they made many improvements to Eridian Grace brain with it Can be ready for transfer in about 4 weeks." He couldn't help the way his heart plummeted.
This was good news, wearing those annoying electrodes hadn't been for nothing. Grace had not a clue how exactly they altered the brain of this body they'd made but he trusted Rocky's word. If he said they'd done it, they'd done it. That also meant the project was almost done. Surely Grace would be able to finally come see the body soon, his half of the transfer room would probably be set up any day now.
But that also meant his life was maybe almost over.
And as far as Grace was concerned, his life was almost certainly over. He was definitely dying. But it wouldn't be painful (probably) and it'd be quiet (maybe??). Waiting for his body to finally give in under the weight of Erid's gravity would surely be worse.
This also meant it might be almost time to say goodbye to Rocky for the final time. Their time together suddenly had a time limit and Grace wasn't sure if he was ready. But he had to be brave, he had to do this. This meant the world to Rocky and at the very least it would provide a lot of new scientific data for the Eridians to toy with for years to come in order to better this new science. And you know, they'd have a human body to dissect too. They'd win either way.
Rocky would lose if Grace died, though. Despite their conversation about it where Grace thought they found common ground a couple months ago, Rocky was definitely still adamant about Grace not dying. He was simply more quiet about it. Grace wasn't ready to lose Rocky and he wasn't ready to lose Grace.
"Oh, thats great Rock," Grace replied evenly. He tried his best to smile but his face remained painfully cynical. He prayed Rocky wouldn't notice, but of course he would. He always noticed. "So uh, whats next then? Is it almost time to, you know, do it?"
Rocky shuffled a little where he sat. He suddenly looked quite small. It was strange, Grace had expected Rocky to immediately prod him about his less-than-excited reaction to his joyous news.
"I have important question, Grace."
"And I have a maybe important answer. Shoot." The rise of tension between them was throwing him off. The witty reply, he'd hoped, would help relieve it some but clearly it didn't. Rocky was still making nervous little noises and fiddling with the blanket. "Rocky, dude, are you okay? You were so excited like 2 seconds ago but now you're all… droopy."
"Rocky can't droop, Rocky is solid."
"Its not literal pal."
Silence settled between the two as Rocky continued to fidget. Grace, meanwhile, reached for his glasses were they rested on his nightstand and pushed them up on the bridge of his nose. Then he waited. When Rocky got like this it was best to just let him think, even though the tension was making Grace feel like he was going to suffocate. He hated seeing Rocky upset.
"Did you actually want to do Project GRACE, question?" Oh.
"What are you talking about?"
"Did Rocky make you feel pressured to do Project GRACE, question??" Rocky probed, his voice firmer now. "Rocky did not consider Grace's feelings. Hid Project from Grace for 6 years. Rocky was selfish, not good friend."
"Was scared to lose Grace, but was more worried about my feelings. Bad friend. I am sorry." Oh wow. Okay.
"If Grace does not want to do project anymore, we will end it. No more Eridian Grace, no more pressure. Will let Grace decide." Grace sniffled. Where did this come from?
"Why are you asking me this?" He couldn't help but ask.
"Because Adrian told Rocky Grace was doing project for Rocky, that Grace is scared. Did not consider this. I am bad friend." If he had to hear Rocky say he was a bad friend one more time Grace might just jump out the window. He raised a hand to gesture for him to stop.
"Okay, I'm stopping you right there," Grace stated. "First off, you are not a bad friend, Rocky. I'll admit, I wasn't really happy that you hid this from me for how long you did, but I get why you did it. I would've been afraid and you knew that. You didn't want me to give up on quite literally the only chance we had just because I was too scared to try."
"Was still not fair."
"No, but I don't blame you," Grace shook his head, causing his glasses to fall down his nose a bit. He didn't fix them. "Second, I wouldn't have agreed just for you. I mean look, you were apart of that decision, but if anything you were one of my bigger reasons to not agree to this." This got Rocky's attention.
"What??" Rocky exclaimed. "Why would I be reason for no project, question?"
Grace couldn't help but let out a small, but sad, chuckle. "Rocky, you literally cannot accept any possibility of me dying. I knew you'd blame yourself if this killed me. I was terrified of that and honestly, I still am."
"Oh."
"Yeah, 'oh'," Grace laughed. Then coughed. Ugh, his chest really wasn't a fan of letting him breathe normally these days. Killjoy.
"Then why did Grace agree, question."
"Because I'm not ready to lose you either. Do you think I want to die?" Rocky yelped in response, which was answer enough. "So thats why I decided to do it. I am terrified, Rocky, I am really heckin' scared. But this is literally the only shot I have to have more time with you." Rocky went quiet.
"So you did do it for me," he whistled quietly in an almost-whisper after a few moments. "Grace was also selfish, statement."
Grace began to laugh again, more coughs mixed in as he did. "Yes, *cough*, Grace was selfish Rocky." He continued to laugh and Rocky began to as well. "I kinda have to be a little selfish to mad scientist my way into extending my lifespan by a few hundred years to be fair. I feel a bit like Dr. Frankenstein a bit right now with the whole defeating death thing." Rocky bounced up and down excitedly, continuing to chitter out laughs as he did.
"No, no!" He butt in, reaching forward and mussing Grace's hair with one of his claws as Grace struggled to push him away. With another, Rocky fixed Grace's glasses that had only fallen further down his face, just barely hanging on to his ears. It made Grace's face feel warm. "Grace did it for Rocky! Grace loveeee Rocky!" Grace stuck out his tongue and Rocky jumped backwards causing the bed to wobble a bit. Luckily, it was made to withstand Rocky's weight. He squawked in mock offense.
"Grace love love love Rocky, love Rocky too much to die!" Rocky declared victoriously. "And Rocky love Grace too much to let Grace die! Both selfish!" He seemed extremely pleased with this, spinning around and launching himself off the bed. He ran around the room much like a cat experiencing zoomies in the middle of the night, hooting and hollering nonsensically as he did. All Grace could do was smile and laugh.
And try to ignore the tears that were budding in his eyes. They were both being selfish. Denying death itself was inherently selfish.
"Okay okay, we have a lot more to talk about right?" Rocky scrambled into the bed instantly and dropped into a loaf in his usual spot between Grace's ankles. No more anxiously toying with his claws or the blanket now either. Full attention fixed on Grace, who was currently trying his best to school his amusement in order to conduct an actually productive conversation.
"Yes yes yes!" He agreed happily. Then he made a displeased whirring noise. "But no more coughing, is disgust. Wet. Gross." That did it. Grace doubled over laughing, internally cursing his back and ribs as he did. Rocky laughed too.
"You know," he grit out in between laugh-coughs. "You're so mean to me sometimes, maybe I should just let death take me." Rocky screeched in response and jumped up, climbing over Grace and gently shaking him, yelling no no no!!! over and over as Grace's laughs continued to echo throughout the room. They were so loud that surely even Eridians outside the dome could hear him loud and clear.
God, he loved that stupid rock so much.
-
2 weeks remaining
"You made a tunnel all the way to the science building?" Grace sputtered. "How far away is this place?"
Adrian laughed as beautifully as always, continuing to help Grace from his bed and into the wheelchair. Rocky however huffed disbelievingly at his human companion as if he had just said the dumbest thing Rocky had ever heard. Maybe he had. Anything is possible at this point.
"How else would Grace get there, question?" He deadpanned. "Grace cannot walk in EVA suit, must be pushed in wheelchair. Need tunnel. Stupid question."
Grace raised his hands in submission after he settled into the chair. "Okay okay, sorry." Adrian gave him a pat on the shoulder from behind.
"Ready?" They asked. Grace nodded before turning to Rocky.
"How about you, bud? Ready to go?" No answer was given. Rather, Rocky just turned and darted out of the room. Adrian called out to him to slow down as they began pushing Grace's wheelchair in an effort to catch up.
Maybe building Grace's house atop a huge mountain only accessible by a flight of stairs wasn't a good idea in hindsight, but thankfully Grace was surrounded by genuinely the most talented engineers and scientists in the world. They'd easily cobbled together an elevator that could carry his wheelchair to the ground similar to those that elderly people use to get down their stairs back on Earth. It ran along a track directly next to the stairs and was fully walled in so Grace wouldn't roll off.
Adrian rolled Grace into the elevator car and he locked the hatch himself, pressing the button to release it. As he began to descend, he could only see Adrian's jade carapace over the wall. That is until Rocky climbed up their side, ignoring Adrian's grunts of protest. He looked like King Kong balancing on the side of the Empire State Building. Thankfully Adrian seemed content to ignore him, far too familiar with his antics to do much else but continue their descent at the same pace as Grace's elevator.
"Rocky, dude, get off," Grace chided. "Do you want your mate to fall down the stairs?" Rocky simply waved his concern away.
"Eye contact important for conversing with humans, statement. You not see Rocky so Rocky climb Adrian so Grace sees Rocky better."
"Eye contact usually needs both people involved to have eyes pal."
Rocky ignored him, instead beginning to rattle off about his complaints about the tunnel construction.
"I should have been in charge!" He declared as he jumped down from Adrian the second the three reached the bottom of the staircase. Adrian simply trotted over to the elevator and unlocked the door as the car came to a stop, carefully rolling Grace out and onto the solid path that had been constructed around when he began needing to use a cane to get around. "Soldering work is sloppy sloppy sloppy, good thing Rocky check before pressurizing!!! Would have exploded!"
"It was one spot, ♩♫♩." If Adrian had eyes to roll, they surely would've right then. "They had already identified the error before you inspected, it would have been fixed."
"Rocky would not have left one bad spot ever!" He admonished. "Never never never." He continued to grumble as he walked ahead, leading the way to the airlock. Adrian chuckled again and followed close behind with Grace.
He hadn't actually seen this new tunnel yet, in fact they'd only informed him about it this morning when they came to retrieve him. He'd known Rocky was designing a tunnel for something, but he hadn't realized it was a connection between his biodome and where the transfer was set to occur. Grace supposed he should've assumed that was the case, Rocky had been reluctant to work on anything but things relating to Project GRACE for some time now.
They were bringing Grace to the facility where the body was being kept, the same place the transfer would take place soon. Today, he would see his new body for the first time.
Adrian reached around and fixed Grace's glasses for him without missing a step. His heart swelled. Whether it was big things like this whole project or small things, these two always bent over backwards for him. He wouldn't trade either of them for the world.
"I will miss your glasses," Adrian murmured softly.
Grace blinked in surprise, feeling his cheeks warm a little. "Whys that?"
"They are cute," they chirped back instantly. "Though you do not wear them right most of the time. Confusing, but endearing." How Adrian could act that casual while saying something that made Grace's heart want to eject itself out of his chest, he did not know.
"Uh, thanks," he coughed awkwardly as Adrian giggled. They knew what they were doing, Grace was sure. "So how big is the body? Its around Rocky's size right? Been a while since I looked over the report you gave me."
"Yes, it is a bit bigger than Rocky."
"Not much!" Rocky yelled from up ahead. "Basically same size! Grace as small as Rocky!"
"Grace's mass is undoubtedly higher," Adrian made a whistling sound. "No need to be embarrassed, ♩♫♩, I enjoy you at your small stature." It was a tease, that much was obvious. Rocky did his best to appear unaffected, but the subtle movements his vents were making gave him away. He was flustered. Adrian simply hummed.
"I am interested to hear what color your body is," they moved on. "Hopefully it is a color that is pretty to humans."
"I'm sure it will be," Grace smiled, watching as Rocky opened the airlock and moved aside to allow him and Adrian to wheel past him. His friend shut the door and began to cycle the airlock.
"Why do we need an airlock for the tunnel?"
"Slight pressure difference, need to be safe." Rocky answered immediately. "Nothing dangerous for Grace, but was too much to take down wall in between."
"How much is too much?"
"Grace worry too much," his friend grumbled. "Is only difference of 0.5 atmospheres. Little. But enough that airlock is needed." The airlock continued to cycle around them.
"Oh, yeah okay thats fine."
"Of course is fine, Rocky make sure." He jutted out his carapace proudly as the cycling finished. The only sign anything had changed at all was his ears popping as the cycle finished. They still felt clogged though, so he opened his jaw and attempted to force a yawn, allowing his ears to pressurize fully.
"Why are you doing that?" Adrian yelped, running around to the front of the wheelchair in alarm. "Did the airlock hurt you, question?? Your ears made a strange sound."
Thus Grace and Rocky spent the next few minutes explaining to them how a change in pressure affects the human body, specifically ears. Adrian still seemed disturbed but no longer afraid which was enough for them to drop the topic. And thank god for that, there's only so much you can say about popping your ears.
They finally exited the airlock and Grace was gifted a sight he had rarely been beheld to; the real Erid. His eyes widened and his breath caught as he began to take it all in. There were lights scattered around outside of the tunnel walls, which were fully transparent unlike the dome, granting Grace a view of what the world looked like just outside his home for the last 19 years. And, wow. Just wow.
It was beautiful.
"Adrian can you get me closer to the wall?" He asked breathlessly, leaning as far forward as he could without falling. They obliged with a happy purr, Rocky waving happily off to Grace's side.
Rocky appeared at Grace's side, looking more than pleased with himself. "Does Grace like, question?" He nodded fiercely in response, stunned to silence.
Well, Erid was certainly no Earth. It was almost like what Grace imagined Mars' surface would look like, just without all the red sand. There was light brown sandy substrate, but it was not quite as fine. It was more like clay sand. Perhaps this is what Earth's surface would look like if it was fully devoid of plants and nutrient rich soil.
Speaking of which, where there weren't plants there were gemstones. Everywhere. While Grace was no expert on identifying gems, he easily recognized what were clusters of quartz growing among the rocks. The colors refracted beautifully around the surrounding area thanks to the lights Rocky had strewn about.
Some of the rocks had layers of a mineral that appeared similar to opal peering through, glowing almost rainbow in the light. He stared at the scene before him absolutely slack jawed.
"You guys never told me how beautiful Erid was outside," he pressed his hands to the glass, eager to take in the entire view before him. His view was limited by the span of the lights but what he could see was simply magical. "Theres crystals everywhere. They are so beautiful."
"Grace knew Erid had crystals," Rocky replied.
"Yeah, but its different knowing versus seeing."
"I can name them if you would like," Adrian purred from behind him. He nodded eagerly and pointed towards one of the quartz clusters, the pale yellow ones closest to the tunnel. "That is positive 3 SiO2. It is one of my favorites." They replied happily.
"Oh, citrine." Grace may not be the best at gemology, but he knows his chemical formulas, specifically that of Quartz. Quartz varieties are the second most abundant mineral group on Earth after all. The 'positive 3' must be the oxidization state of the microscopic amounts of iron within it. "So is that one also SiO2, right? But positive 4? And that one over there is pure SiO2." He pointed at a purple tinted cluster, then a nearly transparent one, which caused Adrian to chirp excitedly.
"Yes!!" They sang. "Grace is so smart, I did not know you knew about gemstones!"
"I don't, honestly." He laughed. "But citrine and amethyst are one of the most common types of minerals back on Earth. They're types of quartz, which is used in a lot of our equipment."
"The Petrovascope had quartz." Rocky added cheerfully. "Or the scanning electron microscope, and the spectroscopes. Lots of quartz in Earth technology."
Grace nodded. "Yup, its good for equipment that requires light waves to travel through it in very specific ways while still being clear to the human eye. Buncha other stuff too. Pretty neat." He trailed off, pointing now to the opal-like rocks. "What about those? They look like opal, but I don't think that'd be able to exist at this temperature."
"That is ♫♬♭♪♬. Not gemstone." Adrian replied. "It is a hydrated mineraloid." Grace hummed in response, considering it thoughtfully.
"I'm gonna call it spectralite," he decided. "'Cause it looks like a rainbow when light shines on it. So you know, spectra, like the light spectrum."
"That is the most creative name you have ever come up with, statement." Rocky said plainly, earning him a very annoyed glare from Grace. He was only annoyed because Rocky was definately right. But Rocky was worse, he'd tried to name planet Adrian, what was it again? 'Medium Rough Texture Circle Planet'. Yeah, he was sure one to talk about creative names.
After a few more minutes of looking at the pretty rocks, Rocky became inpatient and ushered them along. Grace continued to look around with wonder as they went, taking in what he could see of what was the university he taught at. He was even able to catch glimpses of Eridians going about their day, some of whom stopped to wave at Grace on their way by. Some even approached the tunnel, all of whom that did Grace recognized as some of his old students. God, he missed teaching.
Finally though, a building came into view at the end of the tunnel. Really, it hadn't been that long of a walk, not even a mile, but with how long they'd spent looking at crystals and how many times they were stopped by Eridians outside they took longer than expected.
The architecture was similar to his house but much much bigger. Also no windows which made sense. All the walls were textured with patterns similar to the walls of his house, which he knew the Eridians did to make them stand out in their sonar among the rock faces they rested against. The door was large and sat in a very geometric frame. There were intricate patterns carved into it's textured surface and looping around its ornate handle. There were also small decorative stones around the door arranged in rounded plots that were sharply cut off by the tunnel's wall only to continue on the other side.
Grace took a deep breath as he stared at the door way too intensely. He was excited and scared all at the same time. Excited to see what his dearest friends had made for him but terrified of the possibility it would all be for nothing. Rocky reached for the door handle, only to stop and turn back to Grace.
"It is on the other side of this door down hallway," he explained. "Not far now." Grace nodded and Rocky opened the door. Adrian squeezed Grace's shoulder supportively which he appreciated more than he could say. He knew they could both hear his heart's increasingly rapid hammering in his chest.
They made their way down the hallway, which oddly was entirely devoid of anyone but themselves. "Where is everybody at?" Grace asked.
"Told them to go home," Rocky replied. "Did not want big audience for Grace. Privacy."
"Oh." He sniffled. Grace hadn't even thought about that and yet Rocky had. He always thought about the things Grace didn't. At this point, Rocky probably knew Grace's boundaries better than he did.
"Also inconvenient to work in xenonite suits." Oh, yeah, that too. They had flooded this section of the building with Grace-safe conditions after all.
He looked around at the walls, admiring the plaques that hung there. They all had patterns carved into them. This must be Eridian artwork, he realized. They didn't have 2D art forms like painting, but they had anything and everything you could possibly need for 3D art. For a moment he wondered if early Eridians carved into cave walls like how humans painted on them, or if their original way of taking physical records was by carving into rocks before they had raised printers and pens. So many questions, and yet this wasn't the time for answers.
They stopped at an door that Grace recognized must be the door. Especially considering the obviously temporary xenonite barrier blocking them off from the rest of the building that was being used to contain Grace's atmosphere.
It was time to see what might end up being his new body. Grace couldn't help but feel a bit sick.
What waited for them on the other side of the door was certainly nothing to write home about. The room they were in was mostly empty aside from a medical bed surrounded with machinery that had wires running between halves, complete by a large xenonite wall splitting it in two. On the other side, almost exactly parallel to the Grace-sized bed was another, much larger one. It had five restraints positioned around it and was also surrounded by the same strange Eridian machinery.
That would be where Eridian Grace would be positioned, Grace reasoned. And the bed on this side would be for him.
Across the room on the Eridian side was a large cylindrical tank that was the exact height of the room. Grace couldn't see inside, though. It was dark. All he could see was a fuzzy silhouette that he would not have been able to identify as an Eridian's body if he didn't already know what would be waiting there.
"Is that it?" He whispered. Rocky made a nodding motion with his carapace. "I uh, can't really see it. Its really dark over there." This caused Rocky to squeak in alarm, shouting out apologies as he darted to an airlock connecting the two sides. He disappeared behind the large structure and Grace could hear him fiddling with something, grumbling as he did.
Adrian simply giggled. "Rocky told the team to turn the lights on before leaving." They explained. Well that made sense. So the two waited side by side along the barrier until, finally, light filled the tank and illuminated the body floating within.
Grace's heart stopped. Not in a bad way, quite the opposite actually.
"Ta-da!" Rocky sing-songed from the opposite side of the barrier, gesturing to the result of 6 years of work with pride as he reappeared. "Eridian Grace!"
To put it simply, the body was beautiful. It was solid, a very similar shape to Rocky's (which, no offense to Adrian, felt far more efficient to Grace), and it practically glowed under the fluorescent lighting. It was a beautiful, almost honey color with lighter streaks of yellow running horizontally along its carapace and legs.
As if it couldn't get any better, Grace's eyes settled on the front two legs. There he quickly identified a couple of tattoo carvings, a pair of which he immediately recognized as Rocky and Adrian's family crest adorning both arms. Tears filled his eyes before he could stop them.
"Oh my god," he stammered. "Rocky, I-"
Adrian leaned against him comfortingly as tears poured unbidden down Grace's face, humming that same song they always did. He barely heard it.
That was their family crest. On what was going to be Grace's body. He was at least 99% certain thats what that was, he'd traced the pattern on both their legs enough times to recognize it.
"Do you like it Grace? Question?" Rocky approached the barrier nervously, though he could barely contain the excited jitters that traveled through his carapace.
Boy did he love it. It was so.. him.
It looked as much like Grace as a sentient formation of Rocks possibly could.
He sniffled and wiped away a bit of snot with his sleeve. Gross, but he didn't exactly care right now. "Yes, oh my god. Rocky, I love it so much." Rocky cheered as Grace sniffled again, this time assisted by Adrian who gently wiped a tear from his left eye. "Its.. god its beautiful."
"What color is it, question?" Adrian trilled with excitement. Rocky ran for the airlock again to cross back over to Grace and his mate.
His eyes traced over its form again. "Its a honey color, like an orange-yellow with yellow stripes on it." He said with a shaky smile. Then he paused. He was still very focused on the crest carvings. "Just one question though, don't wanna assume. But is that your family crest, Rock?" The airlock cracked open and Rocky immediately answered with an affirmative note.
"Yes!" He chirped fervently. "Grace is part of Rocky and Adrian's family, is normal to have family crest. Want Grace to be included." Grace's tears only grew more intense. That little-
"Oh oh, other marking is Hail Mary mission crest!" Rocky added, reaching for and taking Grace's hand. The heat radiating from beneath the xenonite suit helped keep him grounded. "More simple version. Version on Hail Mary too complicated for carving, made more simple version instead." He was practically petting along Grace's knuckles now, gentle as ever.
"I designed it myself," Adrian purred proudly in Grace's ear. He managed to choke out a quiet thanks that was barely recognizable as a word due to all his sniffling. Both Eridians were now holding onto his arms, resulting in an awkward arrangement of Eridians attempting to be as close to him as possible.
They stayed there for a long time. Grace barely said anything, crying into Adrian's side as his mind raced. More importantly, though, he felt an insurgence of hope in his chest that he had previously barred himself from feeling. And for once, he wasn't afraid of it.
No, right now he was okay with feeling hope. What rested floating within that strange fluid on the other side of this wall was hope. Maybe it was okay to hope this would work.
"You really consider me part of your family?" He managed to choke out eventually. Both Eridians surrounding him continued to hum their song.
"Grace has always been family," Rocky replied easily, not missing a single note in him and Adrian's harmony. "Always always always. Grace will never not be family."
-
Needless to say, Grace really liked his new body. According to him, it was beautiful. So beautiful that he spent most of the night between tears describing its colors to Adrian and Rocky in as much detail as possible and repeatedly telling them to give the team that managed to create it a massive raise. Adrian found that adorable.
Undeniably his favorite part was the crests carved into the currently lifeless arms. His heart had raced so beautifully the second he locked eyes with the familiar symbol and it only grew more excited upon it being confirmed that it is, in fact, what he believed it to me. Adrian had received many compliments on their version of the Hail Mary mission crest as well, apparently it resembled an early draft that Grace had seen floating around back on Earth.
He was asleep now, earlier than usual. Such intense emotions make humans tired much faster, Adrian reasoned. Even their positive emotions were so much more physically intense than an Eridians'. Rocky and Adrian sat together in Grace's living room listening to the rise and fall of his chest from across the home.
"He loved it," Rocky trilled for probably the 50th time that night. "He loved it Adrian! He is excited! I could hear it, his heart was so happy." Adrian purred as their mate continued to jump around excitedly. They were proud of him, he'd been working on this for years and that reaction from his dear human made it all worth it.
"Yes, Grace seemed much more excited than before," they agreed. "Perhaps what he needed was to see it this whole time. It can be difficult to conceptualize something you have not actually encountered before."
"Yes, agree. Adrian is very smart."
"I know, that is why you fell in love with me."
Rocky responded with a happy chirp and bumped his carapace against theirs.
"I will say," Adrian continued. "I did not expect such a reaction from the inclusion of our crest."
"Why is that my harmony?" Rocky asked. "Grace is family, of course he would have our crest."
"Yes, but humans do not have such things. They usually only have symbols to represent romantic love between mates in Grace's culture. I was worried this would be a cultural conflict." With a teasing lilt to their notes, Adrian nudged Rocky with their much larger carapace. "Of course, I am sure you would not have minded such an interpretation." Rocky's sudden stillness told the entire story.
"Its not-"
"I know how much you love Grace," Adrian cooed comfortingly. "You would not call him ♬♫♫♪♩ if you did not wish for more with him. Especially not ♬♫♩♬."
Rocky went quiet. Perhaps bringing this up not wasn't Adrian's smartest move, but with everything about to happen they needed Rocky to know what they knew. He deserved to feel openly, at least around Adrian, especially with the risk of losing Grace that they faced.
"You need not say anything my ♬♫♫♪♩. I just want you to know I approve of your feelings for him." They paused, thinking over their next words carefully. "If this goes to plan, I would not mind if you decided to court Grace. It would be nice to have a third member in our mating cluster and I cannot think of a better person." Rocky finally perked back up.
"You would want to court Grace also, question?" His voice was shy but hopeful. He was adorable but so painfully oblivious.
"Of course my love. Whatever you decide, I will follow. For what its worth, I believe Grace would be a lovely mate to us."
Rocky rubbed up against Adrian lovingly. Their mating song flowed from his vents, joined immediately by Adrian's own chords. After only a few moments, however, Adrian pulled back and raised a claw.
"I am warning you, though, if Grace ever questions what your intimate language means again before that time I will not lie for you again. Using such language in the message to Earth was very bold." Rocky sputtered in embarrassment, his notes falling out of tune. Adrian just giggled.
"I hadn't even realized I did that," he choked out. "Apology."
His embarrassment was more than enough to make it up to them, Adrian decided.
"Wait, Grace asked?! Question?!"
-
1 day remaining
Grace sat on the sandy shore of his biodome looking out across the water that lapped gently at his feet. To his right sat Rocky, who has refused to leave Grace's side since the day they visited the science center. Rocky insisted it was because he had more free time, that Grace needed him, but he knew what it really was. Rocky was afraid, whether he would like to admit it or not.
But thats okay. Grace knew. And you know what, he was scared too. He could die tomorrow. And technically, he was going to die tomorrow no matter what, at the very least this body would. He rubbed his thumb over his knuckles, feeling the roughed surface of his skin that had endured years of work and perhaps the strangest conditions a human has ever lived in. He smiled.
"You are smiling."
Grace laughed. "Yup."
"What are you thinking about, question?"
What wasn't Ryland Grace thinking about was the better question. He leaned against Rocky's carapace and relished in the warmth it filled his body with as he combed through his thoughts.
One thing was for certain, he was still very scared. But he was far more calm than he had expected to be months ago when he first agreed to Project GRACE. Smiles and crinkled eyes came easily despite what lay ahead. He still had nightmares, but they had lessened in intensity again now that Rocky was spending all of his nights watching Grace sleep again. It certainly helped that his stomach wouldn't instantly flip at the thought of the transfer anymore, but why that is Grace wasn't entirely sure. Maybe it was because he had had so much time to think about and come to terms with either possibility, or maybe it was the image of that beautiful honeyed carapace that graced in his minds eye. Or maybe, just maybe, that small spark of hope had ignited into a true flame.
He still was not more than 50% sure that this would succeed. No, definitely less than 50%, maybe 35%. Still no, too harsh. Maybe 45%. Grace trusted Rocky and the other Eridians with his life every day of his life, but even they were capable of making mistakes, especially when dealing with so many unknowns. Despite that though, he couldn't help but feel more confident as he thought about tomorrow. Whatever happened, he knew they had come up with something that would help so many Eridians and maybe humanity too. That knowledge gave him peace.
"Everything."
Rocky hummed thoughtfully. Then, he giggled.
"What's so funny?" He nudged Rocky playfully, albeit with barely enough force to actually move his friend in the slightest.
"What will Grace miss most about human body, question?" Before Grace could even ask how exactly that was funny, Rocky answered. "Is it eating? Or solo human reproductive activities? Waste expulsion?" Oh dear god he had never considered eating. Clearly this realization showed on his face, as Rocky barreled over laughing obnoxiously loud as Grace protested.
"Come on thats not fair! My mind was more focused on the 'I might die' part!" He attempted to shove Rocky away, but he rolled out of range. Grace huffed.
"You never did get fully comfortable with Rocky's eating," he continued to giggle. "Still gag."
"I don't!"
"Yes, do. Can see throat muscles contracting even if you are quiet." Then, as if he hadn't already won the argument, added "Stupid Grace."
Grace yelped in offense as Rocky bounced around him now, laughing like a little pebble as he did. Only when Grace fell back on the sand in defeat did he stop and resettle at his friend's side.
"I'll miss a lot of things," Grace sighed. "But I think I'll miss having eyes most of all. I really wish you could see what I can, you'd understand. The world is so beautiful in ways you will never get to see." Rocky shifted a little.
"I also wish I could see. Color sounds beautiful."
Grace smiled again, the view of the biodome's roof panels fading as he closed his eyes. "Yeah, it is."
-
30 minutes remaining
Eridians surrounded Grace as Rocky and Adrian assisted him in getting on the bed. To Grace's relief, it was cushioned just enough to not make his hips ache much. Not that it would matter soon, but the thought was nice. Rocky stayed firmly at Grace's side, bossing around the scientists as they gently strapped Grace's limbs into the restraints and securing the electrodes and whatever other crazy equipment of theirs Grace couldn't name onto him. Most of them had to be placed on his head.
Funny enough, that was the most Grace had to complain about thus far. They'd forced him to shave his head. It felt cold and bare in the air conditioned room, he hated it. Sure his hair wasn't in the best condition anymore but he would absolutely rather die than be bald for longer than this last hour. Worst of all, Rocky had felt no shame in making fun of him.
"Smooth." He'd ribbed. "Grace head smooth and shiny, definitely reflects lots of light. Like a beacon." Grace hated even more that he'd laughed. Look, the concept of an alien who doesn't have eyes recognizing that his bald head was reflective was as impressive as it was funny.
Adrian waited patiently on the other side of the room, preferring to say out of the way. But Grace could feel them watching. Their presence was comforting.
Finally, once all the medical-sciencey doohickeys and doodads were secured, the barrage of Eridians began to retreat to the control station that lay on the other side of a thin xenonite wall. It was similar to the setup of an xray tech back on Earth who controls the machine from another room thats connected by a glass wall in order to protect themselves from radiation. There apparently were small traces of radiation being used for this which was why they felt the need to stay as far away as possible. Rocky, however, made it clear that he would remain in the room no matter what, holding Grace's hand through it all. Thats exactly what he was doing now.
"Are you ready?" Grace whispered to his dearest friend as he felt his hand being gently squeezed and rubbed. Rocky let out a nervous warbling sound.
"Why are you asking that, question?" Adrian responded instead, arriving back at the bedside now that the room was cleared. "That is what we should be asking you."
"You know, I don't know," he let out a weak laugh, followed by a cough. "It was all I could think of to say." Adrian hummed as Rocky continued to hold Grace's hand as if letting go meant losing Grace forever.
Maybe it did.
"Rocky," Grace said softly. "Are you ready?" His friend did not respond. How funny it was, their level of fear seemingly having been swapped. "Rocky, bud, talk to me."
"I am scared." He muttered at last.
"I am too."
"What if you don't wake up, question?" Rocky whined sadly. Grace's heart cracked in two.
"Then you keep living," Grace smiled. "You have Adrian, you will not be alone. Heck, you're the savior of Erid, I doubt its possible for you to ever be alone."
"No," Rocky mumbled with another gentle squeeze of Grace's hand. "Grace is savior of Erid. You are the reason Rocky made it home."
"Yeah but I wouldn't have been able to save Earth or Erid without you. The taumoeba was a gift from both of us, not just me." It was Grace's turn to rub circles across Rocky's clawed fingers as tears began to bud in his eyes. "You will be okay, Rocky. I promise."
"Won't."
"Will," Grace asserted. "No matter what happens, this technology will help so many Eridians, I'm sure of it. Amputees can have a chance to have their lost limbs back, maybe even specific organs can be grown and used to replace dysfunctional ones. This is going to change the world Rocky, so no matter if I live or die I need you to be proud of what you did." Adrian nuzzled Rocky from behind, softly singing their song.
"I love you, Rocky."
Rocky shifted from his slouched position. He squeezed Grace's hand again, and Grace squeezed back.
"I love you too, my Grace." Rocky choked. "Always always always."
"I know bud, I know."
They sat wordlessly for a moment as Adrian began to sing, what was about to happen settling in Grace's gut. Their song helped to calm his nerves, though. It was like a musical relaxant. He wanted so desperately to listen to that beautiful melody until the end of time.
"Do you think you guys can keep singing that song while it happens, please?"
The answer was a quick yes from both Eridians. This request seemed to reassure Rocky some as well, Adrian finally managing to get him to sit up straighter.
The taller Eridian then turned to Grace, song pausing. "Are you ready, Savior Grace?" They asked gently. Tears welled up in Grace's eyes as he held onto Rocky impossibly tighter. All he managed in response was a nod, but it was enough. Adrian lifted their arm and made a distinctive clicking sound that Grace recognized as the signal the scientists instructed them to give once Grace was ready.
"I love you guys," he sobbed. "Thank you, for everything. I- I wouldn't want to spend my life with anyone else. I love you so much." Adrian gently wiped away his tears as the feeling of sedatives being pumped into his arm began.
"We love you too, ♬♫♫♪♩ Grace," they hummed back before beginning to sing again. Shakily, Rocky joined in.
"Sleep my ♩♫♩," he cooed as his carapace continued to shake. "We will watch. We will stay until you wake up ♬♫♫♪♩. ♬♫♫♪♩, ♬♫♫♪♩, ♬♫♫♪♩."
"Please wake up, my Grace."
The last thing Grace heard before his vision went dark for the final time was the sound of Rocky and Adrian singing beside him and the faint sound of tapping as Rocky watched his heartbeat slow.
TO BE CONTINUED