Chapter Text
The snow rained down harder than ever.
After days of trying to understand what had happened to his beloved, Azure still couldn’t bring himself to face the truth. He convinced himself that what he had done was truly for their own sake, that he had saved them from being possessed by the Devil.
But deep down, he couldn’t shake the feeling that the curse had somehow been transferred to him instead.
The doubts and fears gnawed at him relentlessly, driving him deeper into paranoia and mania. He began questioning everything: what was real, what was imagined, and whether the thoughts in his own mind could still be trusted.
He felt like he was losing his mind. He often woke up thinking Two Time would still greet him once he stepped out the front door. Azure was haunted by the memories of Two Time’s letters arriving between noon and night, the way their voice sounded gentle when he wasn’t himself, and the way their fingers would move through his hair to calm him down.
Azure saw them everywhere, even in the corner of his eye. Two Time’s neck also seemed more bent each time, while the marks his rough grip had left on their throat seemed to deepen. Seeing those marks left him feeling sick and disgusted with himself. The hatred that had always bubbled through his veins was now directed at himself. He had no one to talk to anymore.
There was no one to tell him that it was alright to take his anger out on them, no matter how much he didn’t want to. Two Time only said it because they wanted him to be better, right? Then why did he feel like he was being treated as though he were something too violent?
He wasn’t violent at heart, he never will be.
The thought of hurting another living being on purpose made him feel ill.
Azure was not his sinner of a father, the one who would let him go hungry, patronize him every chance it got, and make him lie to child caseworkers just so it wouldn’t lose its “amazing son.”
Their anger was too similar to one another’s. Perhaps if he hadn’t been born, his father would still be happy with his mother. Azure never knew where his mother was or what she looked like. Did she despise him too? Did she hate her child so much that she could never bring herself to appear in his life?
Every night, he couldn’t stand to look in the mirror and see them behind him. They always had this sorrowful look on their face, even if their mouth wasn’t present. Azure even heard them whispering prayers, reassurance, and encouragement to keep believing in the Spawn and stay true to his beliefs.
But how could he? How could he continue to smile in faith while watching his angel’s body decay on that horrific cross day by day? The stench was horrible, paired with Two Time’s melting face and their eyes, which resembled a void.
Perhaps the process of purification was meant to be this gruesome and tragic. May Spawn strike him down for daring to doubt its plans.
He didn’t feel the same way others did after service, it wasn’t a strong belief in his chest but instead just relief that it was over.
He didn’t have as much faith as he thought after all. The truest thing in his life was Two Time, the sweetest angel he had ever met. They would never intentionally harm another, it wasn’t in their nature to do such a thing.
But the rest of the village refused to believe that.
Today was like the last, with everyone praising him, sending him offerings, and spilling blood just for his blessings. Azure had no blessings to give, truthfully. It was only his angel who had the power to do such a thing. These sacred items didn’t belong to him. They belonged to the one who had held the title of “Spawn’s child” long before him.
He could never compare to them.
Yet, in their eyes, he was the purest thing in those mountaintops. He had always wanted to be treated with kindness and acknowledged for the better parts of himself, but it didn’t feel as good as he thought it would. It had felt amazing at first, with Two Time by his side. The angel who saved his life. He tore their wings off, but they would grow back. Surely, they would.
During the service, he stood by the altar.
The priest, Father Thaniyel, drew a spawn symbol in the middle of the cathedral floor. Candles were lit, illuminating parts of the cathedral in warm colors and filling the air with the scent of myrrh and frankincense. Nuns, members, and bishops gazed upward with their hands clasped together in praise.
Azure spotted the crow, who chirped first while holding a goblet full of blood belonging to their God—or water purified by it.
“Followers of the Spawn, we gather here today to share in the holy divinity of our Lord, for its blessings do not belong to those who turn a blind eye, but to those who walk faithfully in its name.” The crow spoke with nothing but confidence and madness.
The dove and serpent only nodded, smiles on their faces. He followed right after.
What a blind lamb he was.
The goat bleated right after the crow finished his speech. “Our lamb has saved us from the Antichrist! Its visions were nothing but trickery meant to lead us into Hell. Our food supply had run out days prior because of its manipulative guidance.” The goat spoke with venom in her tone, directing her words toward the false lamb, Two Time. Even blatantly saying their name was seen as a sign of sin, as if it were an attempt to call out to their corrupted spirit.
A fawn, only a few weeks old, was brought to the front. It cried out for its mother, fear evident in its eyes as it thrashed in the members’ hands. The fawn had two faces, a saddening deformity that sealed its fate.
The priest began to preach about how the fawn was something created by Satan, claiming that he had failed to imitate innocent life. The member placed the fawn down, and it immediately cowered in fear, lowering itself to the ground in an attempt to camouflage itself against nothing.
Azure shivered as he looked down at the small animal, immediately feeling some sort of connection to it. He understood what it felt like to be seen as something impure by everyone around you when you were only a child, with your sense of wonder soon to be crushed.
Father Thaniyel laid the bottom of his boot on top of the Fawn’s head and prayed before crushing it, immediately breaking the innocent animal’s skull. The crunch made Azure’s eyes water.
He watched as the blood began to pool, while many of the members started to chant and praise the horrific act as though it were nothing more than an impressive circus performance.
Azure dropped to his knees and cradled the fawn in his arms, feeling utterly miserable. He felt hopeless and guilty, mourning even the loss of the baby deer.
He hadn’t even known it was here until now. Why did he feel such a strong emotion toward it? They sacrificed a fawn right in front of his eyes and boasted about it like it was the holiest thing in their lives.
Azure stayed in that position, cradling the small animal as he cried. He didn’t even know when the tears had started to fall. The salty water dripped onto the blood seeping from the wounded fawn, diluting it.
He tried to convince himself that it truly was for a good cause, to carry out Spawn’s will and rid the world of Satan’s creatures. Yet the words felt hollow in his mind, growing harder to believe with every passing second.
The lamb mask pressed against Azure’s face suddenly felt like a cruel mockery. Its innocent appearance seemed almost grotesque now. He was supposed to be the righteous one, yet all he could feel was guilt twisting painfully in his chest.
A lamb, ripped apart cruelly by wolves. It’s innards displayed for the whole world to see, a vivisection for the angels to look down upon. Layer by layer, fat by fat, spilled on the grass. Turning it red. But not one animal would step in to save it. It was nature to kill or be killed.
“Glory to the Spawn,” Azure found himself repeating the words over and over, trying to find some sense of faith before eventually having the fawn taken from his arms and out of the Cathedral, likely to be burned so there would be no trace of evil left.
The serpent looked at Azure before hissing with a deep voice, “You will always be our dearest lamb, what a beautiful blessing you have.”
He didn’t feel like a blessing at all.
Two Time was in the crowd sitting in one of the pews, looking at him with that same expression as always. The marks on their neck were impossibly deeper, the imprints of his hands forever engraved on their delicate pale skin.
Azure started scratching at his arm without realizing it, his nails digging into his skin as though he hated himself more than anyone else ever could. His jaw clenched, his teeth clacking together as if he were freezing. It wasn’t long till the skin barrier gave way to the harsh scratching, leaving blood dripping down his forearm.
drip, drip, drip.
The sound of blood hitting the water in the tub was now loud enough to snap Azure out of his thoughts. He remembered the whole thing while sitting in the foggy water, clouded by bubbles and the dirt washing off his body. Azure stopped scratching himself when he noticed the deep red marks covering his arm. Blood slowly seeped from the wounds, turning the bathwater a faint red as it faded into the rest of the water.
He stood up on quivering legs and got out of the tub, using the edge of it as leverage to make sure he wouldn’t tumble over.
Azure caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror and didn’t even recognize himself. He had bags under his eyes and a crazed look in his irises. He looked sick with how much weight he’d lost recently… He didn’t even know he was losing weight in the first place.
He started to disinfect the scars on his arm and wrap them in bandages, looking dead inside as he did so. Azure missed when Two Time would do it for him, offering him those small words of reassurance. They used to look at him with overwhelming adoration and gentleness.
They always reminded him that it wasn’t his fault.
“Whatever you go through, I do too.”
He remembered the way their voice sounded sickeningly sweet and loving. They worshiped him in the same way he worshiped them.
Azure wanted them back, he almost debated spilling his blood for them again as an offering. His faith had always been for his beloved, Two Time. They were not a demon, they just had to be cleansed of the sin that tried to overtake them.
He knew the real Two Time.
He knew their voice, their touch, the warmth of their embrace. He knew the little things no imitation could ever hope to replicate. And for them, Azure would do anything.
Anything.
He stepped out of the bathroom wearing a smile. There was something unhinged in the way his expression lingered, as though he had finally convinced himself that everything would be all right.
He could wait.
Years, if he had to.
It didn’t matter how long Two Time stayed away. Eventually, they would come back to him. They always did.
And when they returned, they would hold him again.
They would pull him close, just as they had before, and whisper those sweet words against his ear like they always did.
Azure smiled at the thought.
He could wait forever.
Azure walked toward the lit candle in the hallway, preparing to put it out. It was one of his favorite scents: lavender. He used two fingers to snuff out the small flame, not noticing that his shadow was not his own, but instead belonged to his beloved.
The walls in the hall were adorned with delicate frames of pressed flowers and carefully preserved insects, their fragile bodies displayed like little works of art. Among them hung bundles of one of Two Time’s favorite herbs, dried and carefully kept as though he couldn’t bear to let them wither away.
He didn’t want Two Time to abandon him forever.
Perhaps he would deserve it for all he has done.
No, that’s wrong.
Two Time was going to come back.
They promised to never leave.
He remembered the way they smiled when he finished making a flower crown for them. They never stopped wearing it after that, they absolutely loved it. He was a part of them in a way whenever they wore that crown.
And now that crown was wilted, he saw the way it looked earlier. He couldn’t stand to let it die so he tried to save it, but it didn't work. Two Time was definitely going to be upset that it was gone, but he would make a thousand more for them if it meant they’d smile at him sweetly again.
That night, he lay in his bed.
Azure stared up at the ceiling and held himself to sleep, imagining it was Two Time cradling him.
In the morning, Azure woke up with memories of the sweet dream he had. It was one where Two Time visited again, telling him to hold on a little longer. Saying that they would be back in no time while leaning down to plant a gentle kiss against his forehead.
After a long moment, Azure reluctantly forced himself to his feet. His body felt heavy, as though every ounce of energy had been drained from him. He slowly made his way toward the bathroom, dragging his feet with each step.
Once he took a look into the mirror, he found himself staring at his reflection for what felt like at least ten minutes. Azure didn’t see himself staring back, but instead, he saw them. Their familiar features stared back at him, ones he knew far too well. That wasn’t possible. He wasn’t them.
Perhaps Two Time had finally come back but had taken his body as a vessel. He was more than willing to have Two Time back in any shape or form, even if that meant having them inside his own body and mind.
Azure, or perhaps Two Time, took a slow step back, trying to see if this was really true. Once he blinked a few times to test it, his reflection had returned to normal, and he was back in his own body.
Was Two Time still within him? Is it really real?
Azure was afraid yet hopeful.
He touched his face and felt his body, trying to see if it felt more like Two Time’s hands than his own.
It didn’t, but he would find a way to see that reflection again. Azure smiled sickly to himself. He knew Two Time hadn’t abandoned him yet. Inside him, they seethed and clawed, wanting to make their presence known.
He couldn’t bring himself to spill his own blood if it meant forcing him and Two Time to share a body. Whatever happened to him would happen to them as well, and Azure couldn’t bear the thought of being the one to hurt them again.
He pushed the thought aside and spent the remainder of his routine preparing himself, eventually kneeling before his Spawn Shrine in prayer. He lingered there longer than usual, his hands clasped tightly as he searched for some sign, some reassurance that he wasn’t abandoned.
More than ever, he could feel the Spawn’s presence around him. Its connection seemed stronger, almost tangible, like an invisible thread pulled taut between them. Spawn had kept its promise. It had assured him that his angel was still by his side.
So Azure watched his shadow.
Every few steps, his eyes flickered down toward the floor, expecting to see a second one following right behind him. He saw only his own.
Once he stepped out of the door and looked toward the cross where Two Time had been laid, he froze. Their body was no longer hanging there.
The cross stood upright in the snow, its old wooden edges dusted with fresh white flakes as they slowly gathered on top of it. Everything looked untouched, almost as though nothing had ever happened there in the first place.
Had the higher-ups tampered with it?
Did they burn Two Time’s body the same way they had burned the fawn?
It made him want to cry.
The hope he had immediately died down and was immediately replaced with panic for what happened to the remains of an angel he was waiting for.
That body was sacred.
Yet, to everyone but Azure, that body was nothing more than a gateway for the greatest devil to return and destroy all of Robloxia.
He had tried to convince the dove before, that Two Time truly was still a savior but the evidence they had against his one and only was overpowering his claims.
So, he never brought it up again.
He kept it all inside because only he knew the truth. No matter how tightly his throat closed whenever the community spoke of Two Time as if they were the worst thing to ever exist, Azure refused to see them that way. Two Time wasn’t a thing. They were a living being. They had feelings, fears, hopes, and a life of their own.
Maybe Amarah knew it too, but he hadn’t seen her at all lately. Her office had been empty for days, the door remaining shut whenever he passed by.
Amarah had scorned him and wished him dead not long ago. Perhaps she was being punished for those sinful words.
“I refuse to be the one granting a blessing for this unworthy mockery.”
Amarah was disgusted at the thought of even being near Azure. She used to see him as an innocent child, but now that child had grown into a monster, monster who had taken her life away.
The serpent and the goat exchanged glances before one of them eventually sighed in disappointment.
The serpent spoke first. “Don’t you understand? You are still under that demon’s spell. That false lamb was never our savior. It tried to lead all of us, including you, toward death and starvation, a path far removed from the Spawn’s holy light.”
Amarah raised her voice, anger and disbelief evident in her expression. “They were not a demon! I know that! I spent years fostering that child, and now you tell me they were nothing but a seed born from sin? You speak lies as though they are the truth! I refuse to believe this!”
She stormed out of the room and the goat followed after.
Azure had agreed with her when she spat them at him, though. He was every bit the horrible person she believed him to be.
But he always tried to be good. He always wanted to prove the people who had hurt him wrong. He wanted to become something gentler, something worthy of being loved. He wanted to be just as good as the lamb persona they had placed upon him now.
But he was not innocent.
Tears welled up in his eyes and he quickly wiped them.
It was better not to cry about the consequences of his actions, even if he had done right. He saved them just as they saved him, they were going to come back.
Two Time would forgive him for the way he had to cleanse them. The more he remembered their tears and desperation, the more he wanted to disappear.
Feeling this way was a sin.
Azure was taking on the burden of Two Time’s curse so they could rest peacefully before finally coming back. He probably needed to get baptized. To be bathed in water blessed by the Spawn itself would surely wash away all his pain.
In those waters, he could see paradise.
He imagined how it would feel to sink beneath such holy water, to emerge pure or perhaps never emerge but pass cleansed. He may have been wronged his whole life, but the Spawn would always hold him dear.
Two Time would hold him as well.
They wouldn’t call him a sinner for giving up.
But he couldn’t leave them here alone.
He had spent so long trying to become whatever everyone else wanted him to be that, for once, he found himself wanting something simply because it was what he wanted.
Azure liked flowers.
They were better than people, quieter, gentler, and somehow more honest. Maybe, in some ways, they were even better than him.
The thought brought a small sense of comfort.
Maybe he could open a flower shop with Two Time when they came back. He could fill it with rows of colorful blooms and spend his days tending to them. It was a simple dream, but it was his.
And when Two Time returned, maybe they would be happy to see what he had accomplished, happy that he had finally done something for himself.
He repeated the words to himself until he felt it strongly enough to finally walk towards the cathedral.
During the service, Azure stood before the congregation and read several pages from the Spawn’s Bible, his voice steady as the scripture echoed through the room. He tried to keep his attention on the words in front of him, but his gaze kept drifting toward the crowd. He was looking for Two Time.
Yet they were nowhere among the familiar faces.A quiet unease settled in his chest.
Had he upset them somehow? Had he said something wrong? The questions surfaced one after another, each one more difficult to dismiss than the last. He forced his eyes back onto the paper, continuing to read as though nothing was wrong, but the words began to blur together.
That awful, gnawing feeling inside him still hadn’t disappeared. If anything, it had grown heavier. The longer he stood there, the stronger the urge became to simply leave or to run somewhere far away. But he stayed.
He finished the reading, endured the remainder of the service, and waited until the crowd finally began to disperse.
Only then did Azure walk away.
He made his way toward the backroom, shutting the door behind him and finally allowing his shoulders to sink with exhaustion.
He saw the piano he used to play for Two Time. It still sat there, unused and covered in a thin layer of dust. Beside it, Two Time’s violin remained on display, its strings and wooden body dulled by the same layer of dust.
Everything was still there, but neither of them had been touched in what felt like forever. Azure was the only one here to restore it.
A small smile appeared on his lips as he reminisced about the songs they both used to play together. The way Two Time and he would complement each other so well with their instruments. Amarah had even listened to them both play once and had been incredibly impressed.
Azure wiped the black leather seat clean before sitting down. He lifted the piano’s fallboard and looked at all the keys, remembering what each one sounded like and what it felt like to press them.
He looked at the notes he had stored in a bag on the other side of the piano and picked it up by the handle before unzipping it and looking through it. Eventually, he found what he was looking for: the piano notes and guide to “Merry Christmas Mr. Lawrence.”
There was nothing wrong with playing again. After all, the piano had always calmed him. Azure could remember the way his music teacher back in school had always said he had the potential to grow up and become an amazing piano player. He couldn’t remember her name, but she had been like a mother to him. If only she had been his parent instead… Where would he be now?
Azure propped the music sheets up on the built in music rack and studied them all for a second, slowly placing his fingers on the keys and remembering which note was which.
He started to play, completely focused, the music notes were slow and gentle in the beginning.
His fingers began to move with greater confidence, gliding across the keys as the melody unfolded beneath them. The beautiful notes filled the silence, delicate yet melancholic, carrying a warmth that seemed almost at odds with the sadness hidden within the song.
Azure could hear Two Time’s violin mixing with his piano playing, he could almost see them in the corner of his eye strumming the strings with the bow, producing a soft, trembling note that lingered in the air.
Two Time rushed inside Azure’s heated greenhouse, shivering from the cold. They had been out collecting supplies and firewood, and they could barely feel their nose.
Azure had been in the middle of studying a new flower that had somehow survived the icy cold when he noticed Two Time running inside. He waved with a soft smile. “Hello, Nightshade! Are you alright?”
He was a bit worried as he stood up from his work desk and walked past the rows of flowers and plants, some poisonous and covered in fuzz, while others were completely safe.
Two Time immediately hugged Azure once they were close enough, feeling the warmth radiating from him. “Don’t move,” they said sternly.
Azure was like a natural heater to them, despite the fact that they were already feeling hot and beginning to sweat.
Azure chuckled softly before hugging Two Time back and guiding them toward the bench. “I’ll get you a knitted blanket from my storage. Just stay right here, okay?”
Two Time nodded and watched as he walked toward the back of the greenhouse before disappearing into the backroom and soon returning with the blanket and laying it over them.
Two Time relaxed and eventually fell asleep due to the warmth, their nose and ears had turned pinkish at the tips.
He lowered his head slightly, his gaze following the gentle movement of his hands across the keys. Each note seemed to pull another thought from the quiet corners of his mind, giving shape to feelings he could never quite bring himself to put into words. The piano had always been that for him, a place where he could let his thoughts spill freely without having to explain them.
And, as the melody continued, his mind wandered.
He imagined himself sitting beside Two Time, their instruments answering one another in perfect harmony. He could almost picture it: a quiet hall filled with their music, every note of the piano weaving together with the graceful voice of Two Time’s violin. Perhaps one day, they could stand before a crowd like that, sharing a song.
The thought alone made something warm stir in his chest.
How beautiful that would be.
Azure was running through the snowy fields in pursuit of Two Time during an intense game of tag. The two of them had, unsurprisingly, grown closer because of it.
Two Time was way too stealthy and silent when running away and hiding, Azure once found them in a covered hole during hide and seek once he had given up and said they won.
Two Time hit a sharp turn and ran down a path, getting closer to the river down beside it. Azure was following close behind, tumbling a bit since his boots were way too big for him.
Azure ended up in the cold, shallow river after tripping over a slick rock. Two Time immediately pulled him out and began bringing him to Amarah. Azure was shivering badly, yet he still poked Two Time on the shoulder and said, “Tag, you’re it!” while giggling.
Two Time huffed, thinking it wasn’t fair, but decided to let him have his victory.
It wasn’t a particularly long walk, but Two Time was much frailer than Azure and moved at a painfully slow pace. What should have been a short journey felt like it lasted forever, each step seeming to drag on.
By the time they finally made it to Amarah’s place, Two Time was exhausted. Amarah immediately scolded the two of them for their condition, though her sternness softened as she brought Azure a set of fresh, warm clothes and wrapped him in a thick, fuzzy blanket.
Whatever trouble they had gotten themselves into seemed to have been forgiven soon after. Amarah returned with two steaming mugs of hot chocolate, the sweet aroma filling the room.
Azure took a sip and nearly melted into the warmth. It tasted absolutely heavenly.
His left hand joined the melody, pressing the lower keys with a steady rhythm while his right hand danced across the higher ones. The sound grew fuller, reverberating softly around the room.
B5 F6
E7 F7 B5 E6 E6
A5 E4 D7 E4
D8 A6 G7
B6 E6 A4 D8
A4 E7
B4 E4 A4 G7 F7 B5 F4 G7 E6 A4
A4 E7
B5 D7 E4 F6 E4 F6 B4 E4 D7
Dawnkeeper, the person wearing a witch’s hat, stood across from Amarah while holding Azure’s hand. He greeted Two Time’s mentor with a warm grin.
“Greetings, Amarah. It’s been quite a while. How have you been?”
Amarah and Dawnkeeper fell into conversation, exchanging pleasantries as they caught up for a few moments.
Meanwhile, Two Time peeked out from behind Amarah and noticed Azure standing beside Dawnkeeper. Two Time gave him a small, shy smile before raising a hand and waving.
Azure waved back. “Hi, Twice,” he whispered quietly.
The two littles continued their hushed exchange for a moment before Dawnkeeper’s voice interrupted them.
“Well, Azure here is a very smart child, aren’t you, Azure?”
Azure immediately looked up at Dawnkeeper and nodded enthusiastically.
Amarah smiled and clapped her hands together in encouragement. She bent down slightly, lowering herself to Azure’s level.
“Very impressive, Azure. Keep up the amazing work, and Spawn will be sure to reward you,” she said warmly before straightening back up.
He memorized everything, it was like muscle memory. Azure also remembered the other songs he and Two Time played together, Clair de lune was one that always made him imagine a future with Two Time where they both grew up without any more doubts and worries.
Azure could’ve sworn he felt two hands rest on his shoulders but paid the feeling no mind, thinking it was probably his head playing tricks on him.
The snow felt like clouds underneath the two.
“Azure, what do you think happens in the afterlife?”
Two Time spoke softly to Azure while lying beside him in the snow at night, long past curfew. Their finger traced the stars above them as they tried to make out the constellations.
Azure had no idea what happened after death, but he hoped it really was paradise, just like everyone said.
“Hopefully a wonderland,” he said bluntly.
“A wonderland with you by my side.”
Two Time’s cheeks heated up despite the cold weather, and they turned their head to smile at him.
“You always say such sweet things. Do you truly mean it?”
Of course he did. He would never want to live in a world where Two Time never existed.
He simply looked at them and stated, “Life without you has no meaning.”
Two Time held him close after that, the warmth from their bodies slowly chasing away the cold surrounding them.
They were all they both needed.
They both healed each other and knew the other’s true feelings, they would be there for each other no matter what happens.
Even if the two of them would burn in hell if they ever kissed.
Azure would gladly be a sinner for Two Time.
He was simply playing.
And as the final notes lingered in the air, Azure slowly lifted his fingers from the keys. The room fell silent again, but the faint smile on his lips remained.
For a brief moment, everything felt peaceful.
Those sweet, crystal-clear memories kept him going. Two Time was waiting for him. Azure decided to clean off Two Time’s violin and put it back beside his piano. It was the respectful thing to do for them, since they weren’t here to clean it themselves.
The crow had been waiting for him the moment he stepped out of the room.
“You should play during the service tomorrow. Your piano skills are like a dream come true…” The crow paused, seemingly considering something. “Though, we will need to replace the old violinist.”
Azure felt a wave of disgust at the suggestion. Nobody could play Two Time’s violin the way they had. No one could replicate that graceful performance, the delicate movements, the emotion woven into every note. The thought of someone else taking their place felt almost wrong.
So, he declined the offer of a duet.
“I’d rather play alone. It’s much more calming,” he lied.
He didn’t actually mind playing with someone else. In fact, he might have even enjoyed it.
Especially if that someone was Two Time.
Azure stepped out of the cathedral after successfully evading a further conversation with the crow’s loud mouth, it made his ears hurt just listening to it boast about righteousness.
He walked along the stone path leading to his warm cabin, the one place that was tainted by his grief but not the community’s hatred for his beloved.
He saw something standing on the rocks of the mountain. Somehow, it had the legs of a mountain goat, but it seemed to have a human head, with flowers covering its upper face. It was staring right at him before continuing its journey, jumping along the barely visible rocks.
Azure was always amazed by wildlife and even studied them, so he simply continued walking while watching the creature head higher up the mountain until it was eventually no longer in sight.
Once he made it to his home, he immediately locked the door and collapsed on the couch. Exhaustion taking over the routine he had planned for tonight.
Eventually, he had to get up and do his night routine.
He went to sleep that night and dreamt of a life where he and Two Time met outside of the village and built a life together.
By the next day, Azure was already out gathering wood and collecting meat from the traps scattered around the village.
The snowfall had eased considerably, and for once, the forest was strangely still. It was a welcome change that made Azure’s work much easier. He made his way down toward the river, carefully following the familiar path through the snow.
When he reached the riverbank, Azure checked the fish traps one by one. A few of them were packed with fish, their bodies shifting against one another as they struggled in the confined space. Azure carefully emptied the catches into a nearby bucket before resetting the traps for another haul.
Once he had finished, he continued deeper into the woods.
After finding a few trees that looked sturdy enough to provide good lumber, Azure set down his bucket and pulled his axe from his side. He tightened his grip around the handle and swung the axe into the first tree.
Thud.
The sound echoed quietly through the snow-covered forest.
Azure continued chopping, each strike biting deeper into the wood as small pieces of bark scattered across the snow. He kept chopping till the empty cart beside him was full of wood and ready to be brought back to the village.
Without warning, a boulder broke loose from the mountaintop and came barreling down the slope toward Azure. Yet it made almost no sound. Thick snow blanketed every rock and frozen surface in its path, swallowing the rumble of its descent.
Azure glanced up at the last possible moment.
His heart lurched.
The snow-covered boulder was already upon him, far too close for him to get out of the way. His body refused to move fast enough. Panic surged through him as the massive shadow swallowed the light above.
Then something slammed into his ribs.
The impact knocked him violently sideways just as the boulder crashed down where he had been standing. Azure lost his footing and went tumbling through the snow, hitting the exposed roots of a tree with painful force.
Hurt exploded through his side.
Azure groaned in pain and frustration as he looked up.
He froze for a second when he saw the tall lady in front of him, towering over him. It was the creature he had seen before. Her eyes weren’t visible because of the flowers, and she had the same goat legs that were perfect for climbing mountain rocks.
“You should be more aware of your surroundings,” the lady scolded in a flat tone. She was clearly an outsider from a nearby area, but her attire was nothing like the clothes the Fire Ring members wore. Those freaks were completely obsessed with fire and even drank gasoline in the name of their Lord. Some even resorted to committing arson or burning parts of their own bodies as proof of their loyalty.
The goat lady wore a coat covered in leaves and branches. The rest of her clothes consisted of layers of traditional robes and soft wool. A belt decorated with different patterns and carrying various items and vials was wrapped around her waist. The vials shone with different transparent colors and didn’t look safe for human consumption.
She looked like the embodiment of nature itself.
The lady tilted her head slightly, regarding Azure with quiet judgment.
“Are you done observing?” she asked, her tone flat and almost impatient.
Before Azure could respond, she continued. “I have seen you many times before. You are not like the rest.”
A faint sense of unease settled over Azure. His hand slowly drifted toward the dagger secured in its holster at his waist, his fingers resting against the hilt.
“How long have you been watching me?” he asked, his voice cautious.
His body tensed, ready to defend himself or run at the first sign of danger.
“Since you’ve had someone by your side—the one with black hair and hollow eyes—I know what you did. Even if you can’t bring yourself to face it. I’ve seen the doubt in your eyes whenever they tell you to keep believing.” The lady explained calmly while pointing the wooden staff in her hand at Azure’s face.
“You know the truth.”
Azure clenched his teeth, anger tightening his jaw. This lady knew nothing about his feelings, nor did she understand anything about Two Time. She couldn’t possibly comprehend what everything had meant to him, or why the cleansing had been necessary. He had saved Two Time from an eternity in Hell. At least, that was what he needed to believe.
The goat lady slowly lowered her staff, pulling it away from Azure’s face. Without another word, she turned and began walking away.
“You will follow your heart and escape, if you know what’s good for you,” she said, her voice carrying calmly through the cold mountain air.
She continued toward the rocky slope before effortlessly leaping onto the stones. Her hooves found purchase against the uneven rock with each step, allowing her to climb the mountainside with ease. In moments, she disappeared among the snow-covered cliffs, returning to wherever she had descended from.
Azure tried not to let the lady’s words get to him, but they left him feeling far more anxious and afraid than he wanted to admit.
He quickly got to his feet, grabbed the bucket of fish, and began hauling the cart back toward the Spawn Community.
When Azure arrived, he delivered the wood to the workers and handed the fish over to the butchers. With his tasks finished, he headed straight for his greenhouse.
He walked through the rows of displayed flowers and found the marigolds, a few of them had started to wilt.
Marigolds were Two Time’s favorite flower.
Hard seeds of hate I planted
That should by now be grown, - Rough stalks, and from thick stamens
He held the petals gently in his hands, yet something felt wrong. His body was unusually hot, a familiar heat spreading through him.
His hand began to tremble. His grip tightened until he crushed the delicate petals in his palm, the remaining fragments slipping through his fingers and scattering onto the ground.
A poisonous pollen blown, And odors rank, unbreathable, From dark corollas thrown!
At dawn from my damp garden
I shook the chilly dew;
The thin boughs locked behind me That sprang to let me through;
Azure doubled over his workbench, struggling to catch his breath as heavy, uneven breaths escaped his lips. That same overwhelming anger from earlier was clawing its way back to the surface, hotter and more suffocating than before.
He was tired of being lied to.
Was the community lying to him?
Was the Goat Lady lying?
Or was he the one lying to himself?
The uncertainty made his blood boil. Every unanswered question only fed the rage churning inside him, twisting his stomach and tightening his chest.
And the thought of possibly killing the only person who had ever made him feel truly safe only made the fire inside him burn brighter.
Still, he had chosen to believe.
He had let them strip him of everything. His blood, his tears, his faith until there was barely anything left to give. He had even shed his own blood in the name of the Lord’s protection.
And yet, after everything he had sacrificed, he was still left wondering if any of it had ever been enough.
The blossoms slept, - sought a place Where nothing lovely grew.
And there, when day was breaking, I knelt and looked around:
The light was near, the silence Was palpitant with sound;
I drew my hate from out my breast And thrust it in the ground.
Oh, ye so fiercely tended,
Ye little seeds of hate!
He finally broke down, tears spilling down his face as the misery and frustration he had kept bottled up for so long came rushing to the surface. No one understood him. No one ever seemed to see beyond the titles forced upon him, the roles he had been expected to play throughout his life.
Azure couldn’t even tell where he ended and Two Time began anymore.
Now, he understood.
He understood what it was like to have people look at you and see something you never wanted to become. To have an identity chosen for you until you could no longer recognize yourself beneath it.
“We are the same with our problems.”
He remembered Two Time saying that once, after Azure had bludgeoned a squirrel.
I bent above your growing
Early and noon and late,
Yet are ye drooped and pitiful, -
The blossoms slept,-I sought a place
Where nothing lovely grew.
Azure tore a handful of flowers from the table and hurled them against the walls and floor of the greenhouse. Petals scattered across the glass and soil, fragile and weightless against the violence of his grief.
He wailed and wailed, his cries echoing through the greenhouse like the fawn cried out for its mother.
Soon, Azure was no different.
He cried out for someone to come.
For a guardian.
For a savior.
For anyone who would hear him and finally make him feel safe.
And there, when day was breaking, I knelt and looked around:
The light was near, the silence Was palpitant with sound;
I drew my hate from out my breast And thrust it in the ground.
Oh, ye so fiercely tended,
Ye little seeds of hate!
I bent above your growing
Early and noon and late,
Yet are ye drooped and pitiful, - I cannot rear ye straight!
The sun seeks out my garden,
No nook is left in shade,
No mist nor mold nor mildew
Endures on any blade,
Sweet rain slants under every bough:
Ye falter, and ye fade.
It wasn’t long before a nearby community member heard the racket and alerted the others, claiming that Azure had been overtaken by a devil.
Perhaps he had.
The noontime church service had begun only minutes earlier. Inside the cathedral, the priest stood confidently before the congregation, preaching the Spawn’s word, when several members suddenly burst through the doors.
They dragged a breaking-down Azure into the church.
Gasps rippled through the pews at the sight before them. Their pure lamb, the one they had so desperately tried to protect, was now being consumed alive by the very same sin that had devoured the old lamb.
“You said my life was yours, and I tried so hard!” Azure screamed at the higher-ups as they hurried him toward the bath of holy water.
“May you be cleansed in the name of the Spawn.”
The Dove chanted the words first, and the congregation quickly followed in unison. Their voices echoed through the cathedral as they forced Azure beneath the surface.
They made him hold his breath.
To Azure, it felt like he had been submerged for an eternity. His lungs burned, his chest tightened, and panic clawed at him as the muffled voices above became distant and distorted.
At last, they pulled him from the water.
“Glory to the Spawn!”
Again.
“Glory to the Spawn!”
And again.
Azure stared blankly at the wall across from him, barely registering the chanting that surrounded him. Then something warm splashed over his head and shoulders.
He froze.
It was blood.
“This blood was so faithfully given to us by one of our commanding elders,” the priest announced. “Lady Amarah. She sacrificed herself to save you.”
Azure began to shiver.
His breath hitched as tears welled in his eyes and spilled down his face once more.
“No—”
A scream tore from his throat.
And the higher-ups screamed with him, their voices rising in fervent encouragement as they urged him to cast out the devil they believed possessed him.
“Release it!”
“Release the devil!”
“Glory to the Spawn!”