Chapter Text
11:00 7/21: ELZIA
God I’m so late, Sakura is going to kill me. Shit Sakura’s alone at a party right now. This is all my fault, I should have never fallen asleep. Will sakura be alone? Or will she be with new friends and happy? God I hope it’s the second option, she’s always been amazing like that. I press even further on the pedal, I should text Sakura, but instead I glance at maps, I’m still 45 minutes away! Wait what? I was 30 minutes away just a second ago?
Oh shit. I made multiple wrong turns.”you know what? Fuck this, Siri play car playlist1” Elzia exclaims. It was one of the worst playlists, it jumped from depressing love songs to hard rock. I feel like I’m forgetting to do something? She was singing along to “after you” by Stray kids, well screaming to it, and all she could think about was Sakura, how her long eyelashes shimmered in the sun, how her hair bounced up and down, how she got that beautiful smile when she made her laugh.
She got that familiar feeling of butterflies in her stomach at first, she welcomed the feeling it felt warm despite the cold night. Of course, she promptly shut it down, or at least tried to. She’s never quite been able to get rid of the feeling. She hoped one day it will be acceptable to like girls, but until then she can never speak of it out loud.
In the haze of thought and loud music, Elzia didn’t see the car, she didn’t see how they weren’t stopping, and she didn’t. Not until it was too late.
And even in the end, Eliza’s final thoughts were about Sakura.
11AM 7/22: SAKURA
Eliza had died at 11:11 last night. The news didn’t hit as her parents told her. She couldn’t speak, this had to be a sick joke right? How could someone so full of life be gone? Her parents waited for a response, they weren’t getting one any time soon because Sakura sprinted to her room.
She barely got the door closed before she crumbled to the floor. Oh my god, she’s dead she gone, and it’s all my fault. She couldn’t breathe, her heart was hammering. She could faintly hear her parents knocking on her door, she could hear the birds singing, but most of all she could hear Eliza’s voice playing in her head. “do you want to drive us? I know you like practicing” “nah I’ll walk, I need to get my steps in anyway. I don’t think I’ve left my room since summer started.” Something so simple, so fucking simple. If I hadn’t been such a fucking idiot and drove us Elzia would still be here. Oh my god, she’s knew Eliza was a bad driver why would she let her driver by her self!
The crushing weight spread from limb to limb, my head was pounding, my heart hammering, my stomach was nauseous. Thank god I skipped breakfast I wouldn’t be able to keep it down. You were playing truth and dare when she died. While Elzia was suffering I was playing a children’s game.
The birds continued singing, the sun was shining, and the neighbors were doing yard work. How could the world just go on without Eliza? Why was it her? Why couldn’t it be me? Briefly she registered she was have a panic attack, but she didn’t care.
She couldn’t breathe at all anymore, she was gasping for air like a dying fish. Was this how Eliza felt as she was dying? Maybe she was dying too, that’s okay she deserved it anyway, Mabye she could be with Eliza now.
Sakura wondered what Eliza’s final thoughts were? Was she in too much pain to think? Was she thinking about how much she hated me for causing her death? Was she filled with regret? Even more guilt crashed into my chest. Until she couldn’t take it anymore and passed out.
Not even sleep was an escape. She dreamed, if you could even call it dreams, about Eliza. She dreamed about all there moments together, she dreamed about there future, she dreamed about what her final moments were like.
When Sakura woke up she was in bed, odd considering she was on the floor before she passed out. Then grief hit her like a bullet, yet she didn’t cry she just stared out the window, wondering how everything went so wrong. It was pitch black outside. I wonder if this was how dark it was when Eliza died.
Sakura went to check her phone and it was fucking 11:11. Exactly 24 hours ago Eliza was dying in her car, because of course after colliding with a speeding car, she hung on until the very end. She managed to survive 4 minutes after the crash. A “miracle” that she survived that long. Sakura didn’t think so, a miracle would have been if Eliza was alive. Not Eliza suffering 4 extra minutes.
She tried to fall asleep again being awake wasn’t a great option. Immediately after closing her eyes she was consumed with fear. What if I don’t wake up again what if I die in my sleep? She wasn’t ready to die, Espically in such a mundane way. Every time she closed her eyes she felt the life draining out of her. Was this what Eliza felt like as she died? Mabye I deserve this, I basically murdered Eliza.
She battled with her inner turmoil until she passed out again. She was plagued with more nightmares. Not even sleep was an escape now.
SAKURAS PARENTS 10pm 7/22
“Should we give them to her?” Her
Mom whispered, “Not yet, let her process this first, give it some time” in the end both her parents agreed to wait to give Sakura Eliza’s final gift to her. Because after all, mourning takes time.