Chapter Text
Shuichi couldn’t focus on his detective work that night. Right now, all he could think about were earlier events of what happened with Kokichi. It kept replaying over and over in his head — like a broken stereo. He flushed.
Right now, he wasn’t a reliable, level-headed detective, but rather, a lovestruck boy. Lovestruck — there was no denying it. He found Kokichi, in that moment, incredibly adorable, to the point he would feel giddy simply thinking about it.
Shuichi was no stranger to the idea of love or having a crush on somebody, despite how straight-faced he may seem. He had had a few crushes before (though short-lived) and was easily flustered when it came to that prospect. Which was why — and he never would’ve expected it — he realized and was sure he harbored those feelings towards Kokichi. Yes, that’s right. He had come to fall in love with Kokichi Ouma. A prankster, a liar, someone who is easily considered his polar opposite. They do say opposites attract, but Shuichi hasn't held it much credit until now!
But it was untrue to say that this was the moment he fell in love with Kokichi. He had realised that, too. The truth was, he had honestly liked Kokichi for a while. In the early days of the academy, when Shuichi was much more introverted, still wearing his hat (he cringed a little when he thought back to it), he found Kokichi to be a big piece of work. He was always lying, causing trouble and teasing others. It was a total, dizzying shock for an introvert like Shuichi. He had instantly latched onto him upon learning his talent as an ultimate detective and pestered him with questions on the daily. Shuichi couldn’t deny that he too had an interest in Kokichi. He spent a lot of time pondering and wondering about Kokichi’s so-called secret organisation, why he acted the way he did, and what he was thinking, since Kokichi himself never gave him these answers. It was like that for a few weeks. A month or so. Then, thanks to Kaede and the others, Shuichi felt truly comfortable at the academy, growing more confident and leaving his hat behind. Kokichi had always kept some form of distance, but it felt like he had gotten even closer after that, rambling on about “Saihara-chan’s character development!” and how he really was a real detective.
Now, following that, Kokichi’s playful teasing also increased. Well, it's playful teasing, but it may be more akin to flirting. Kokichi was probably just joking, as Shuichi concurred. But Shuichi was completely singled out when it came to this “playful teasing,” and it led him to think on some more. As his confidence as a detective was growing, he grew more confident to chase after Kokichi — as in, becoming more questioning and assertive, hoping for some answers from him. However, the more assertive he became, the more excited Kokichi got and the more he lied. And so the two developed a cat-and-mouse dynamic. Shuichi himself found it rather thrilling, despite being draining and exhausting. He may have admitted his feelings now, but he still wouldn’t deny that Kokichi was a handful. Yet he knew that at his core, he was surely a kind person.
The lies he told would eventually stir up laughter from among the class. He would use lies in bizarre ways to remedy situations, Shuichi had noticed. He used to view lies as something that was completely wrong — but seeing Kokichi, who challenged that directly, made him feel a little different.
Also, he had once seen Kokichi chasing away a young girl’s bullies. They were in elementary school, Shuichi could tell, from their physicality, freestyle clothing and satchels. Kokichi joined the side of the bullies, two boys, and acted like an exaggerated version of them. They must’ve been embarrassed or found it embarrassing to see a high schooler act in that way so they flusteredly said they were bored and ran off. Kokichi patted the girl's head and walked with her somewhere, presumably to her parents. Seeing a softer and more genuine side of Kokichi made Shuichi feel warm inside. Surely, his feelings only intensified since then, but now, he was able to address it surely.
It’s because he couldn’t deny the absolute infatuation he felt when he saw Kokichi genuinely flustered — and because of Shuichi himself, no less. Initially he was confused, but the more he thought, and realized, he quickly wanted to see it again. Even though Shuichi surely had a much more straightforward personality than Kokichi, he felt like he was always in his palm, always being led by him. The fact he had been able to catch *that* Kokichi off-guard made him proud and excited in a way he didn’t want to admit — it was almost childish.
So as he sorted papers and took a look at the assigned sheets, as he undressed, as he took a shower, as he went to bed — Shuichi wondered if Kokichi felt the same way. Rather, he wondered if he even had a chance.
It was true Kokichi was always teasing him, telling Shuichi things like they were soulmates and that he loved him, but it felt like blatant lies to the point Shuichi had gotten used to it and no longer questioned it. His heart would truly skip a beat when he saw Kokichi being himself.
And it’s not like Kokichi didn’t tease other guys, saying things like, “could it be you like me?” Or “Wow! I love you after all!” often. Shuichi did feel a little jealous, though, despite him receiving most of Kokichi’s antics. In his bed, turned to the side, he then went on to wonder if Kokichi even liked guys. Shuichi was easily flustered by both guys and girls — he knew he didn’t exactly have a preference, and had no problem dating someone, regardless of their gender, so perhaps he was the term “bisexual” (as he had googled). However, none of his male friends had really discussed sexuality deeply, so he had no idea if he was the only one. This was his first time having a crush on a guy.
It’s true that Kokichi was comfortable teasing guys flirtatiously, but he could’ve just been one of those people who had no problem flirting with the same sex as a joke. Actually, Shuichi was embarrassed to be trying to figure out Kokichi’s sexuality, compared to him usually trying to find out his intentions, which seemed much more profound. But he really did want a chance with Kokichi. He did want to ask him out… sometime in the future. When he built more courage.
It was midnight, and now, Thursday. Shuichi simply could not drift off to sleep… There was still school, meaning he would see Kokichi again. Would Kokichi show his face, after running off like that? Because there was no denying the blush on his face, and ears. Shuichi had gotten a good look, and Kokichi surely knew that. Shuichi had been in such a trance, he hadn’t messaged or checked on him, meaning that there was still tension. But Shuichi couldn’t wait. If Kokichi did show up, he’d have to bear his face to Shuichi. If he didn’t, then it would be like admitting defeat, which he would undoubtedly hate. Having a crush… liking someone… It really is exciting… Again, Shuichi never imagined his school life could become this fun… not at all. Smiling a little, he drifted off to sleep with his thoughts, excited for the incoming day.
The next day was not exciting at all. Nor were the days after that.
So Kokichi did show up to class, yay. He behaved like his usual self like nothing had happened. Which was probably easy, because he had made no attempt to talk to Shuichi at all! It’s not like Shuichi was a lovesick puppy who needed Kokichi’s constant coddling to feel happy. No, it wasn’t that kind of crush at all. But anyone would be hurt to see the person they like deliberately avoiding them!
Shuichi had tried to talk to him many times, inviting him to lunch, to the vending machine, a walk back to the dorms — things that Kokichi would usually invite him to first! But Kokichi evaded each and every question, making up excuses with his usual smile, and scrammed off. The weekend came, and Shuichi resolved that by Monday, he would absolutely fix things, to at least go back to the way they were. He hadn’t realized how strange it felt when Kokichi stopped interfering with his daily life.
So he decided to confide in Kaede. Kaito was rather hot-blooded and definitely didn't get along with Kokichi. He would have to break the news to him slowly. Maki, though composed, was no better, and despised him. He realized he wasn’t quite ready to open up to a guy about it too, so he put Rantaro off the table too. From the start, he had a feeling she would be the best pick, so as they walked to the convenience store together, Shuichi explained the situation.
“Eh?! No way..!” Kaede looked shocked, but her eyes were full of sparkles, as if watching a drama, “Th-this, this is… Saihara-kun, what will you do!? It’s just like a lovers quarrel!”
“Well, we’re not lovers… I don’t even know how he feels about me..”
“Huh, really? He blushed at your words! I saw it myself! It means something!”
“Like… what, exactly?” They reached their destination. The convenience store’s doors automatically slid open as the bell played.
“Definitely, he must like you..!” Kaede skipped over to the ice cases, where the ice creams were.
“But, he could’ve just been shy. That doesn’t equate to romantic feelings.” He inspected the ice creams, a coffee and cream biscuit flavor catching his eye.
“But, he doesn’t blush like that when others say the same,” she slid the lid open, reaching out for a strawberry flavored shaved ice bar, “We’ve got a bunch of people who like to say meaningful things in our class, y’know? I’m sure I’ve said something before, but I didn’t see a reaction like *that* from him! You can ask Gonta too!”
“That… that may be true, but…” Shuichi began to look at the coffee in the refrigerators instead, “what are you saying then…? That Ouma-kun… likes me? It’s still hard to believe.”
“Yeah, you’re right… but if I had to imagine him having a crush on somebody, it’d surely be you.”
“…” He finally decided on a milk coffee.
After paying for their respective items, they stepped outside into the hot summer sun. Sweat already began to trickle down their foreheads. Kaede, before unwrapping her popsicle, turned to Shuichi.
“Umm… so I totally made it worse, right? By following you guys…!”
“N-no… it’s okay. You just wanted to make sure I wasn’t getting pranked.”
“Yeah… sorry. Um…”
Her apologetic face suddenly turned dead serious.
“So… you understand there’s one, absolute way you can resolve this, right?”
“Huh..?”
She looked him straight in the eyes.
“You need to confess your love!”
…
…
“Huh-eh-wha-?!”
Shuichi’s face burned, the summer heat intensifying.
“You heard me! It’s now or never!” Kaede smiled with absolute confidence, as if she was the one about to go and confess, “Saihara-kun, be strong! Don’t back down now! You’ve come so far, right!”
“Right, but this is totally different! I was hoping to wait at least a little longer!”
“No buts! No waiting! It’s the perfect time! If not now, then when?”
She had a compelling point. If not now, then when? It’s true Shuichi didn’t have complete faith in himself to actually eventually confess to Kokichi, albeit he desired to.
“I’ll organize it for you straight away! Come on, what do you say? After school in the classroom on Monday!”
“..Organize? How?”
“I’ll stop Ouma-kun from leaving the classroom! I’ll make sure everyone’s out, then keep him in with you!”
“Hmm… well, if it’s you, the class rep, I’m sure it’s possible…”
“Yeah! Leave it to me!”
“But, um… how am I even supposed to?”
“Well, you should prioritise communicating that there was a misunderstanding first. That you meant everything you said and after that, it’ll just come out naturally! One thing after the other, and you’re confessing! You can even say you thought his blush was cute!”
“What if I’m rejected?”
“Well, I am almost 90% sure that won’t happen, but in the case it does, emphasise you’re really open to being a good friend. Remember, we’ll support you no matter—Ah, my ice cream is melting!!”
It sounded simple enough… Shuichi was willing to give it a try. Ah, but maybe… I’ll just skip the confessing part and clear the misunderstanding… I’m… not mentally prepared…
After the two parted ways, the next day came quickly.
Monday. It was time. Even though he had decided not to confess, it was nerve-wrecking! And, to his dismay, though as expected, Kokichi had kept his distance today too. He needed to clear the misunderstanding up for good and be able to be his friend and classmate again — though it would be nice if they could be something more.
Kaede, true to her word, ushered everyone out under the lie that she saw a venomous snake while purposely closing the door on Kokichi.
“Hey~! Don’t slam the door in my face!” Kokichi called out to her, in vain, as there was no response, and he sighed, “Geez, you guys hate me so much you’d leave me alone with a deadly snake!?” But then, he laughed. Shuichi knew that Kokichi would’ve probably seen right through her. As he reached for the door handle, Shuichi, in a flustered panic, grabbed his wrist and turned him around.
“A-ah—”
The moment felt slow, as he took in Kokichi’s surprised face. Even then, he didn’t let go. He held tighter.
“Ouma-kun, let’s talk…!”
“Hm? Is there something to talk about?” He replied quickly and curtly, feigning non-chalance, “Sorry, but I’m in a hurry! Unless you want to get eaten by the snake, Saihara-chan!”
At the use of his name, Shuichi instantly softened, feeling incredibly relieved. It was the first time he had heard him address him by his name since the week before. Such a small thing really, but he was still happy about it — his determination grew stronger.
“Y-you’re avoiding me. I think I know why, but…” Shuichi averted his eyes, whilst Kokichi stared unsatisfactorily, his expression tainted with unease and impatience. “C-could you tell me the reason? Even if you lie, I’d like to hear it… from you. Um, please.”
There was a pause, before Kokichi started laughing. But it wasn’t the natural, childish one Shuichi adored. “Sure! The truth is, I was deeply, deeply in love with Saihara-chan, y’know? So much that I dreamt of him every night!” His face began to scrunch up, the kind he did before crying in a completely exaggerated manner, “But then, he totally pranked me, and I was s-so deeply hurt a-and—”
“No, Ouma-kun. Stop.”
“Hm?”
Shuichi knew it. What he was seeing. “You’re just making it seem like you’re lying by exaggerating the truth, right? W-well, I’m not sure about that first part, but still…”
Kokichi’s smile grew smaller.
“It truly was a misunderstanding… everyone was trying to get a reaction out of you, but I wasn’t, I swear!” He could no longer hide the desperation in his voice — he desperately needed Kokichi to know the truth.
“Oh? Then why were you with them all day? Akamatsu-chan and Iruma-chan were still tailing us after, you know!” He began smiling widely again.
“N-no, I… was keeping an eye on them…”
“Wow! What a lame excuse!”
“No, it’s true! Ouma-kun, I meant it all! I want to continue to grow as your good friend!”
“Oh, really? Hm!” Kokichi’s expression looked increasingly annoyed, panicking Shuichi.
“I-I wasn’t pranking you… I was being genuine…” he was unable to look him in the eye now, feeling increasingly ashamed and flustered, before mumbling, “..um… I want you to talk to me again…”
After making a request like that, Shuichi was blushing profusely. This didn’t go unnoticed by Kokichi, who was slightly intrigued. But of course, a serious reply was impossible. “Oh? Saihara-chan, you make it sound like we’re in a lovers quarrel or something!” Shuichi’s eyes widened slightly, “Could it be, the reason you tagged along with everyone was also because you wanted to see me all flustered yourself? What was it you said, ‘I want to see your different sides?’ Ah, so you meant it literally! Hey, is it okay for a detective to be this much of a pervert?” Though Kokichi was merely jesting, it struck Shuichi straight through the heart.
Kokichi was absolutely right. He did that with that underlying intent. Since he was exposed so easily, there was no use hiding it, right? He looked Kokichi straight in the eyes.
“Yeah, that’s right.”
“Hm?”
“I did say that. And like I said, I meant it. I meant everything I said! You are a good person, I want to get to know you more… at least…”
“Ohh, you’re doing that thing again. You’re totally trying to take me aback!”
“I’m not, I’m telling you the truth!”
“Yeah, right. Hey, did you enjoy humiliating me, Saihara-chan? Did it make the Ultimate Detective feel good?” Kokichi began to take on a more accusatory tone, looking slightly hurt.
“That’s not—”
“It must’ve been so funny, right?”
“I-”
“Did you get a good look, huh? Did you like it?”
“Yeah, I did! I liked it, because I like you!”
…
Huh?
Kokichi had definitely been expecting Shuichi to deny it again. And yet, he could detect no lie in his words.
Shuichi’s eyes were no longer averted — he was looking at Kokichi straight, his gaze absolutely piercing. “I mean, I’ve liked you for some time, so that’s why everything I said wasn’t a lie! I’m sorry if it grosses you out, but it’s true,” His hands were now gripping Kokichi’s shoulders, refusing to run away, “I like you… I like you a lot, Ouma-kun! Whether we could actually be together, I didn’t know, but… I still wanted to express my true feelings for you at that moment! As your friend…”
Kokichi was rendered speechless. He was absolutely limp in Shuichi’s grip. This was definitely, not what he expected, nor how it was supposed to go. As if it couldn’t get even more chaotic, it looked as though tears threatened to spill from Shuichi’s wavering eyes. “If you reject me… at least, let me be your friend… being with you is fun… I want to stay by your side… ugh….”
Kokichi snapped out of his shock, taking in the situation, “H-hey, are you serious? Don’t suddenly cry! Uh… um…” He hadn’t really seen this side of Shuichi.
Shuichi, however, was even more ashamed — he covered his face with his hands and sank to the floor, meekly murmuring, “Sorry… just… ignore me, Ouma-kun…” He didn’t control his emotions in the slightest, and it was a disaster now. Everything went wrong, the truth was out, and now he was going to start crying on his knees in front of the person he fell in love with. Truly, it couldn’t have been worse. As he tried desperately to calm down, the boy in front of him finally spoke.
“So… you meant it when you said I wasn’t boring… right?”
Shuichi slowly lifted his head — and there, he saw that sight again. Kokichi’s cheeks were slightly pink — and his ears were slowly turning red. He was avoiding eye contact. Hope and relief began to blossom in Shuichi — he immediately began to rise. “Y-yeah! I meant it!” There was silence for a moment. “Do you… believe me?”
Kokichi’s face tensed slightly, before sighing, “…well, you’re just too easy to read, Saihara-chan. Of course I’ve known all this time.” He smiled. Butterflies stirred in Shuichi’s stomach. “It’s just… mm, nevermind! So don’t cry!” He laughed — genuinely and honestly. Shuichi felt like he was going to cry again. “S-so, we— we’re friends again, aren’t we?”
“Not more than that?”
“Huh?”
Shuichi had just missed it — but he could’ve sworn — he saw genuine worry in Kokichi’s eyes, before he put on his typical, mischievous face.
“Haha? Well?~”
He didn’t even take a moment to wonder if it was a prank — immediately, Shuichi replied, “Y-yes! Um, I’d love to date you, Ouma-kun!” Hearing the words come out of his own mouth made him want to curl up and die from embarrassment, but he had to take his chance. Kokichi reciprocating, dating Kokichi, it sounded euphoric. He never could’ve imagined it, but he had always wanted it.
“Alright! Then it’s settled! We’re officially saying!” He extended his hand, grinning from ear to ear (which was still slightly pink, Shuichi noticed) offering a handshake. “Let’s continue to see all sides of each other, okay, Saihara-chan?” Without a second to waste, Shuichi gently took his hand. Immediately, he relaxed.
Ah, I knew it…
His hand… really is warm.
—
Well, that was a weird story, wasn’t it? And totally out of a romantic drama! Seriously! What idiot wrote this? Anyway, I suppose this whole thing was pretty unnecessary and ultimately my fault. I knew Saihara-chan was genuine from the start, and had no bad intentions, but I was totally embarrassed, you know? For an Ultimate Supreme Leader, pride is the utmost virtue! Well, not exactly, but I’m definitely a prideful person, and good at keeping that status, unlike, well, Iruma-chan.
Me, who was always keeping Saihara-chan on the tip of his toes, always taking the lead! The fact he managed to drop a massive blow on me — so embarrassing, I couldn’t take it. I couldn’t even admit it was embarrassing to him — that’s just how my pride is. Admitting that something is embarrassing is embarrassing. Admitting that admitting something is embarrassing is embarrassing, and so on. Anyway, I absolutely am in love with Saihara-chan, which didn’t help my case. And to think even Akamatsu-chan saw my blush makes me want to die. So I had no choice but to avoid Saihara-chan — not showing up could be even more embarrassing, but I wasn’t ready to see his face at all! It was just a reminder of that embarrassing incident.
I knew eventually, I’d have to talk to him again and mend things and such. But I also thought it wouldn’t be so bad if I had kept a distance from then on — you see, I would’ve never expected that Saihara-chan actually wanted to date me. My feelings were unrequited, and that was, admittedly, painful, so it might’ve been better to just keep my distance. Yet, even sooner than I had expected, Akamatsu-chan made it so that me and Saihara-chan were alone in the class, so that he could confront me. I wonder if she had told the others about it beforehand, because her lie was seriously not it. Anyways, I was totally panicking, because it looked like the door couldn’t be opened, and Saihara-chan was coming closer. A confrontation was too soon and way too embarrassing! Forcing me to confront something — it sounds horrible. So as I planned my escape, Saihara-chan began talking. However, he said some things I couldn’t help but answer and question — my own pent up frustration began to surface, and I lashed out a little, pressuring Saihara-chan and venting my anger onto him, whilst simultaneously joking around, trying to seem callous and unbothered (I was totally sweating). It also annoyed me to no end how he talked about being friends and friendship! Don’t you know my heart's calling out for you, Saihara-chan?! But all's well that ends well, right? An unexpected development happened, and he professed his love to me. I was so shocked! And then, he started to break down, and I didn’t know what to do! My brain was overloading!
Again, I couldn’t sense a single lie in his words. I felt myself heating up a little. I asked him a question, because ever since Saihara-chan said I was “not boring” (a line he totally stole from me) I couldn’t stop thinking about it. Well, including all the mushy stuff he said, but that especially. I’ll admit something again, I’m always trying to be entertaining, you know? So to hear that from someone that isn’t me is… and to think he used my own words against me… how very Saihara-chan. I liked it. Honesty just kept slipping out of me. But I reclaimed some of my dominance and standing! Right when I asked Saihara-chan if he wanted to be something more. It was 100% a genuine question. But I tried to sound as carefree as my usual self — in case I was somehow rejected — so I could play it off and save the embarrassment. But just as I hoped, he’d accepted, and I had felt truly, and completely happy. I felt so warm that I could have just burst into tears — love is really incredible, huh? Just kidding! Do I seem like the type to say something so mushy, even to myself? Haha! Or maybe I am? Who knows! Surely, only Saihara-chan.
Because we’ll see each other's other sides — he’ll unravel my lies. That’s the promise he made to me, after we shook hands. For a lonely person like me, such words are ever so promising. Well, the moment didn’t last long, as Gonta barged in to rescue us from the “snake”. Akamatsu-chan followed in, desperately trying to stop him. Seriously, what am I gonna do with him? But I got my happy ending, so I’ll forgive him.
So me and Saihara-chan have been dating for some time now. Throughout this time, I’ve also been pondering the meaning of seeing each other's sides. What extent did it go to? One morning, I wondered while getting dressed for school. My shirt was half on when Saihara-chan barged in — saw half my torso — got incredibly flustered, unable to look away, before shooting out. Was that something to get *that* flustered over? Not only was it only half of my torso, but also the lower half, revealing only half my stomach. It’s true my clothes are long sleeved and always covering me head to toe, but was such a reaction really warranted? Hmm…
I smiled mischievously.
So that’s also what it means to you right now, Saihara-chan.
Ah, really — is there a more perverted detective? I don’t need an answer to that.
Well, it’s fine. Just don’t forget your lover’s insatiable, Saihara-chan!
Excite me — every day — until the end!