Chapter Text
LENA
Lena got the role.
The lead role in that student film she had been so nervous to audition for? They just called her to confirm that she had landed that role. As in, Lena was still holding her phone in her hands, fresh from ending the call and smiling ear to ear.
She got the role. She got it!
The amount of joy and giddiness bubbling up in her was indescribable. All she knew was that she needed to share all of these big emotions with someone or she would explode. Her fingers moved across the screen faster than her brain could catch up.
There was one person Lena wanted to call first. Someone who's happiness was infectious and often her lighthouse in a storm. Someone who would always be happy for Lena, above all else. Someone that Lena held near and dear to her heart.
Miu answered on the first ring.
"Hello, Miu?"
There was a pause as the connection solidified. Then she heard a bubbly voice say, "Phi'Lena! How are you?"
Lena was still reeling at this point. It hadn't yet hit her completely that she got the thing she most wanted. She stumbled through her words as she said, "I, yeah, um, I'm good. I'm really good, actually."
"Oh? Did something happen?"
She could hear the smile in Miu's voice.
Lena reached up to fiddle with the ends of her hair, saying, "Do you remember that audition I was telling you about? The one for—"
"Uh-huh, the student film." Miu answered before she gasped aloud, "Oh my god, did they give you the role?"
Lena could not stand still for the life of her. Practically skipping around her room, Lena said, "Yes! They did, they gave me the part!"
As much as she wanted to scream, Lena restrained herself. But Miu had other ideas; Lena could hear shrill squeals of joy on Miu's end of the call. Only when the noise subsided did Miu say, "I told you you'd get it! That's amazing, Lena! You must be so happy right now."
"I'm a little dazed if I'm being honest." Lena admitted, "But I'm excited to get started. I-I've got about a week and a half before they start actually filming—"
"So soon?" Miu asked, likely tilting her head.
"Yeah, the film is actually a project for a couple of the directors so they need to edit and submit it before mid-semester," Lena explained.
All that meant was that the pressure was on. Which meant that Lena needed to strive for perfection, if not outright achieve it. She heard as Miu made a little hum in understanding. Lena's mind drifted to thoughts about the script and line-reading and oh god, there were going to be professional cameras, should she get a facial and hair treatment before—
"I'm so proud of you, phi."
Everything went quiet in Lena's mind.
She stopped moving as she rested against the bed-frame. She pressed the phone against her ear and almost held her breath as she waited for more from Miu.
"I'm serious." Miu said, resolute in her words, "I don't even need to meet whoever else auditioned for the part. You were the obvious choice. You're gonna be amazing and I can't wait to watch you on my screen again."
Lena would be lying if she said she wasn't tearing up; she could feel the tears pricking at the corners of her eyes. It just felt so nice to be so appreciated and seen, especially by her favourite nong. By Miu. It felt like having someone in her corner.
"Ah, flattery will get you everywhere with me." Lena joked although her words were too soft to sell it, "This is why you're the first person I called."
There was a pause. Then, Miu asked, "Really?"
"Really."
There had not been a doubt in Lena's mind as to who she wanted to tell this news to first. It was always going to be Miu. No one was higher on Lena's priority list. Everyone else could wait but her superfan could not.
"That means a lot to me," Miu admitted softly.
"Good." Lena said with a grin, adding, "Because I'm going to be needing your services for the next week and a half."
"Oh?"
"Well who else am I going to run lines with?"
In truth, Lena was a little nervous about this whole thing. She had been in television dramas and web series before but this was her first film. Student film, yes, but it still counted. And she was the lead role. It was exciting to branch out and try new things but that didn't stop the anxiety from creeping in.
Miu giggled as she said, "I've never done that before but I'll do anything my phi asks me to."
"Be careful, Miu. Some people would take advantage of that kindness," Lena said lightly.
"But not you."
Lena was sure she was floating on a cloud right now. Who knew that Miu had such a way with words? She wondered if Miu's tongue were made of honey since all her words were so sweet.
"Never me." Lena agreed, adding, "Well… unless I could get a boba out of it."
Miu's next word came out taut: "Lena."
Well that was a first. Since when did Miu just call her phi by her name like that? Were they close enough now that Miu felt comfortable in speaking so sternly to her? Lena's burning cheeks were… caused by unknown reasons.
"Kidding, I'm kidding," Lena said, trying to diffuse the nervous energy building up in her.
She could practically feel Miu's withering stare from kilometres away. It was as impressive as it was scary… like a very angry teddy-bear.
The phone call ended soon after, peppered by a few sweet words and soft voices. Lena found herself cradling the phone to her chest and staring into nothing. There was a smile seemingly etched onto her face. No matter what she did, she couldn't stop herself from smiling.
Well, no, that's not true.
The smile did fade once Lena realised something rather important: the film was a romance. The film was a romance and Lena just asked Miu to read lines for it. Together. The two of them reading lines together for a romance film.
…
That was totally fine. No worries. Lena was chill with that. They could just read their lines and skip the super romantic bits. Like the cuddling and the hand-holding and the…
For no particular reason, Lena needed to go for a run immediately and then take a long, cold shower.
It was a Friday afternoon, dipping into the evening. Lena was sat at her desk with her script in her lap. She had the script it bound with a blue spiral spine earlier in the day, and now she was reading over her lines. She highlighted certain sections and annotated with her notes. Mostly just actions, emotions, and whatever she thought would be important for the scene.
Once she was done with this re-read, Lena's next plan of action was to start a character study. Whenever she was given a new role and a new character to embody, Lena would conduct a character study: she would consume content and media that similarly portrayed the archetype of her character.
Considering this character was the lead in a romance film, Lena had one course of action.
Only fifteen minutes into the Notebook, however, and Lena ended up getting a call from her favourite nong.
Miu's name adorned the top of Lena's phone screen and it was like a Christmas tree had lit up inside Lena. She was quick to pause the movie, answer the call and press the phone up to her ear. She did not, in that moment, question why Miu was calling so late in the day.
"Phi?" Miu's sweet voice said.
"Hello, Miu," Lena replied in a gentle lilt.
She could hear the smile in Miu's voice as she said, "Hi. Are you busy? Am I interrupting something?"
"Oh, yes, you are, actually." Lena said in faux-seriousness, "I was in a very important meeting with myself, Rachel McAdams and Ryan Gosling."
"…Are you watching the Notebook, Lena?"
Her incredulity and comedic timing made Lena struggle to hide her giggles as she said, "Isn't that what I just said?"
"Lalee~" Miu whined and dragged out the syllables.
Right. So Miu had started calling her that recently. It was supposed to be a cuter version of Lalina, which was actually one of Lena's names. The nickname was a first for Lena but she couldn't say she disliked it. She actually loved it a lot. Nobody except Miu had ever called her that, and it made her chest feel all fuzzy whenever it was said — even though Miu usually only used it when she was whining.
"I'm kidding," Lena said with a small laugh, "what's up?"
"I need to ask you for a favour…" Miu trailed off.
The tinge of anxiety in her tone was unmistakably. Raising an eyebrow, Lena asked, "OK, what's the favour?"
"It's kind of embarrassing."
Lena shut her laptop and sat up straight: this should be good. Since when did the extrovert supreme ever find anything too embarrassing to share or to talk about? Miu was the kind of person who was unafraid to ask strangers to join in her TikToks, for example.
With a sigh, Miu began to ramble: "So my friends really want me to go to a party tonight. It's at an apartment, I think that one of the seniors lives there. But I don't really know anyone there. Like, yeah, my friends are going, but they all like to drink and I don't really do that but I feel like they might pressure me into drinking and—"
"So why are you friends with people that might pressure you?" Lena cut her off.
Her spidey-senses were tingling. She wanted Miu to have new friends but if her friends were going to pressure her into things, then Lena would rather Miu just find yet another group of friends. Lena clenched her jaw and let the muscles feather as she held it down tight.
"Hmm, maybe pressure isn't the right word." Miu clarified, adding, "I think I mean I'll feel pressure but I'll also get FOMO, you know?"
Lena's hackles settled back down as she said, "Ah, I see."
"Yeah," Miu murmured, "so I was wondering if you'd be my plus one?"
Zap!
Lena's brain-short circuited for a moment. The only time she heard the English phrase of a 'plus one' was when someone took a date to a wedding or to a similarly formal event. As far as Lena knew, that phrase was always used in a romantic context, and as something official.
"L-Like a date?" Lena asked, unable to stop the stutter.
"What?" Miu immediately said, a frantic edge to her voice, "N-No! As my friend! Just my friend."
She heard Miu laugh a little nervously, but Lena didn't join in. She didn't find anything funny about this situation. In fact, her heart was in her throat at the idea of being Miu's date to… anything, really.
Was it supposed to be something laughable?
She tried not to dwell on the idea. Lena settled back in her chair and said, "Gotcha. OK. So I'm basically you're designated driver. A trusted adult kind of thing."
"No, no, you can drink if you want. Hell, you can take a few drinks for me," Miu replied.
Lena grinned, saying, "Now that I can do."
She heard Miu sighing with relief before she asked, "So you'll come?"
"Of course I will." Lena said, adding, "How could I ever turn you down?"
As far as Lena was concerned, Miu was her perfect, little pookie-bear nong who could do no wrong. Ever. If Miu needed a small favour like this, it was no skin off of Lena's back. If anything, this just meant they could spend more time together.
As much as Lena didn't care for parties, her script-reading and movie night could wait.
Miu breathed out, "Thank you, phi. Seriously, I don't know what I would do without you. Between the alcohol and someone telling me that Narong would be there—"
Lena was already up and grabbing an outfit.
"Send me the location. What time is the party?"
"Uh, seven," Miu replied, albeit confused and glacial.
She heard a quiet pinging sound coming from her phone. It was just a notification that Miu had dropped the location pin for the party. When Lena examined the address, she found that it wasn't too far from here. It was also only an hour before seven. The perfect amount of time to prepare for war.
Lena flung open her closet as she said, "Believe me, Miu. You'll go home sober tonight."
Tentatively, Miu asked, "Will you?"
"Not likely."
Her mind was so far from scripts or movies now. Lena was on a mission. She would ensure that Narong (and any other subpar man) didn't even get to breathe the air around Miu tonight.
Lena didn't hate parties. She just thought they were a waste of time. The music was always too loud to even hear yourself think, she didn't care for alcohol and it's byproducts, and she didn't care to dance anyway. So as she found herself surrounded by a crowd of sweaty, drunk adults, Lena just grimaced and pushed her way through.
She was already overstimulated and it hadn't even been a few minutes since she stepped inside. All she wanted to do was find Miu and rescue her like some knight in shining armour.
The apartment where this party took place was unnecessarily big. There were two options here: either the guy who lived here was filthy rich, or he rented it with roommates. She was dubious about the latter option.
Lena chose a very reasonable outfit: boot-cut jeans, a backless top and appropriately-tall heels. Her hair was lightly curled and flowing down her back. God bless her mother's thick hair genes. Her makeup wasn't too heavy given the circumstances and she applied a good amount of eyeliner — she was going for a 'fuck-off' kind of look tonight.
What she wouldn't give to be curled up at home watching the Notebook for the umpteenth time. Alas, duty called.
It took Lena some time to actually find Miu. As she searched high and low, Lena had briefly run into a few people she knew. They were friends-of-friends or peers she knew from her classes. Most of them had been surprised with her presence; Lena was known for never coming to parties. Lena had always been the kind of person to never leave the house unless invited out.
Unlike Miu, the social butterfly. It was her bubbly personality that made everyone gravitate to her. This included Lena. In her eyes, Miu was like this inescapable black hole of fun and optimism. Her laughter was infectious. Unfortunately, everyone else agreed.
So it wasn't unreasonable that Lena found the woman in question sitting on a couch and surrounded by a gaggle of friends.
Miu was like a shining light even now. It was as if there was always a halo around her or a gentle spotlight shining down on her. The world around Miu either dimmed or leaned in closer to her.
At least, that was how Lena felt when she looked at Miu. The same Miu that had yet to notice her.
Smiling, Lena took out her phone.
LENA: Look up.
She watched as Miu reached for her phone on the coffee table before her.
Within seconds, Miu's head snapped up and their eyes met. Lena felt a thrill go through her. Miu looked absolutely beautiful. She was easily the most beautiful woman in this party. She wondered if Miu had any thoughts about Lena's outfit. She wondered if Miu thought she looked pretty.
She hoped so. She didn't know why she wanted Miu to think she was pretty but she did.
Miu's face exploded into a beaming smile before she all-but leapt off the couch. Miu practically crawled and stumbled over the other occupants on the couch just to get to Lena's side. Without warning, she wrapped Lena up in a tight hug. She hugged her so tightly that Lena was sure her lungs shrank a little.
The scent of rose tickled Lena's nose as she leaned her cheek against Miu's ear. Rose, and the faintest whiff of some fruity alcohol.
When Miu pulled away and she could see the entirety of her face up close, Lena changed her mind; with her makeup and outfit so perfectly done, Miu was the most beautiful girl in their university.
"You came!" Miu said, still beaming.
Lena tilted her head, asking, "How could I abandon my nong?"
Miu was squeezing Lena's biceps with that giddy, nervous energy. Lena realised that her own hands lingered on Miu's waist. She wondered if Miu could feel that Lena worked out her arms today. She found herself hoping so.
"You look amazing. Oh my god, those jeans," Miu said as she stepped back.
Lena's hands fell to her sides and she immediately missed the proximity between them. She chalked it up to Miu being the only friendly face around.
"Speak for yourself," Lena replied, "you're easily the prettiest girl here."
Miu scoffed, saying, "Have you seen my friends?"
The smile turned a little hard and stern as Lena said, "I've seen everyone. My statement hasn't changed."
They held each other's gaze. Lena with her jaw clenched tight and Miu chewing on her bottom lip.
Lena wasn't exactly sure what was wrong with her. Everything felt… different. All she knew was that since Miu used the phrase 'plus one', it felt like Lena's brain had been rerouted. Even as she was looking at Miu now, she could feel the prickle of electricity dancing along her spine.
Wrapping her hand around Miu's bicep, Lena said, "Come on, introduce me to your friends. I need to have words with them."
"Why? Because they poached me?" Miu asked in a teasing lilt.
"See?" Lena said, bumping their shoulders together, "You're not just a pretty face."
As her reward, Miu's face went bright red. It was worth the risky compliment.
?!
Wait, why would it be risky? Can't she just compliment her friend? What was so dangerous about that?
Whatever, Lena was just having an off-day.
As Lena pushed away any strange thoughts, Miu led them over towards the L-shaped couch. All of Miu's friends were scattered along the cushions, and there were glass bottles and aluminium cans decorating the coffee table in front of them. There wasn't a single person that Lena recognised here.
That would usually bother her, but Miu was here. That made everything bearable.
"Guys, this is Phi'Lena. She's a good friend of mine," Miu announced to the group as she gestured to Lena.
All of Lena's juniors proceeded to do a wai to her in greeting, if not outright greeting her verbally. Lena only bowed her head in response since this wasn't a very formal setting. She didn't care to keep any of these people as her juniors, either; she was still digesting that Miu's friend group were so tolerant of peer pressure. Especially when alcohol was involved.
Lena followed Miu's lead as she sat them down in the corner of the couch, which was technically also the middle section. Right at the heart of the conversation.
She barely had time to sit down as the first question came firing out: "How do you two know each other?"
Miu answered, "Ah, Lena is friends with one of my family-friends. Do you know Tongta?"
"Isn't she a drum major?" Another friend asked.
"Mhm. So is Lena."
There were some noises of understanding that rippled through the small group. Lena was too busy watching Miu speak to watch anybody else's reaction. Did Miu always have such thick hair? Lena felt like it looked extra lovely tonight. It looked so soft, she must've used a new conditioner. Or maybe a volume mousse?
"Phi?"
Blinking, Lena realised that she was too distracted to realise that Miu was talking to her.
"Hm?" Lena hummed, feigning nonchalance.
Miu said, "I was asking if you wanted anything to drink."
"Not just yet." Lena replied, adding, "I'll poach some from you later."
Apparently she hadn't spoken as quietly as she thought; there were some noises in disagreement to this proposed theft. These friends clearly wanted to get Miu drunk and Lena was the evil villain foiling their plans.
That was just fine by Lena. She watched as Miu mouthed a small 'thank you' and that was all that mattered to her.
The party continued on. Alcohol was flowing, people were dancing and the conversation on the couch was going strong. They were in the quieter part of the apartment where Lena could actually hear herself think. What a miracle.
She kept out of the conversation for the most part. Occasionally she would chime in just to be polite and avoid being that one weird friend that never spoke or just brooded in the corner. Mostly, she was just watching Miu. Actually, admiring might be a more appropriate word.
Miu was in her element. She was already a chatty individual but being in the heart of the party was clearly were she thrived. There wasn't a single person who didn't laugh at Miu's jokes nor was there ever a moment of silence. Everyone seemed to want a piece out of Miu, platonic or otherwise.
As for the reason Lena was here, she noted that Miu was nursing a bottle of apple cider that had barely been touched. She seemed to be holding it like a shield rather than a beverage. As if to say 'please don't give me alcohol, I've already got this.' Lena found it adorable, especially for someone as health-conscious as Miu.
But that abstinence didn't last long, of course.
"OK, everyone, let's do a round of shots."
Of course. The obligatory round of shots in every friend group that happened at least once per party. Lena watched as the person carrying the tray of jello shots began handing them out to everyone. There weren't enough to go around even with Lena declining the one offered to her.
Miu shook her head politely, saying, "No, no, I'm good. I'm still getting through this cider."
One of her female friends whined, "Come on, Miu. Just one."
There was the bat signal.
Lena leaned forward and plucked the shot glass from the girl's hands, a thin smile on her face. She said, "I'll take one for my nong, then."
And who could argue between a phi-sao? Miu's friend gave her a small pout as Lena stole the glass from her. However, there was no pushback any more than that. Maybe this friend took the hint that Miu didn't want to drink. Or, more likely, it was probably just too awkward to even try to force it after that.
Lena downed the shot along with everyone else. It tasted like shit as she expected. The lime and salt did not help a single bit. God, Lena hated alcohol. She would never see the appeal of it.
As she grimaced from the taste, she felt a hand rest itself upon her thigh before it squeezed the flesh there. When she found the owner of said hand, she found Miu shooting her a grateful look. If it were possible then she'd say that Miu's eyes were sparkling.
Unfortunately, Lena had trouble functioning as she felt Miu's hand rub up and down her jean-clad leg. It was only a brief movement but it dizzied Lena.
She blamed the alcohol. After all, what else could make her so dizzy all of a sudden?
As it turned out, Miu had been completely right in her fears.
Everyone and their mother seemed to try and get Miu drunk tonight. If it wasn't her silly girl friends who wanted to bond over alcohol, it was the stupid boys who just wanted to see a pretty woman tipsy for their enjoyment.
Thus far, Lena had taken five shots in Miu's place. She was beginning to think she was the new target for this speed-run towards liver failure rather than Miu. She couldn't remember the last time she took a shot, let alone five of them.
The worst offender in this bunch was one of the boys. He had taken the bottle from Miu and kept trying to force a shot of tequila into her hands. He kept babbling something about taking risks and being courageous. Whatever the fuck that had to do with the situation.
Lena thought she had been very nice when she stole the shot from him.
("If you can't understand the word 'no', I pity the women in your life. Cut it out.")
Needless to say, he didn't try that again. Lena didn't drink that shot, either. She poured the contents out into a nearby bucket of half-melted ice, wondering if there had been any nefarious intent behind his pushiness. She chose not to consider it.
It was about an hour and a half into the party now. Lena was feeling awfully boneless; she didn't usually consume alcohol so it was all hitting her pretty hard now. The room loved spinning above her and the giddiness bubbled up in her like… bubbles. Listen, she was too drunk to be poetic, OK?
The couch was so soft underneath her. Miu was just in arm's reach. She could see Miu chatting away and it made her happy to watch her nong be happy, too.
The other thing she could see was the hand still resting on her thigh. Miu's hand.
Her hand was so pretty: dainty, feminine, with lovely long fingers. She had a beautiful set of nails that must've have been done recently. They were just the right length with a small point at the tips. Lena surmised that those nails would feel amazing scratching her scalp right now.
Lena had no idea when she reached out and began playing with Miu's fingers. All she knew was one moment she wasn't touching Miu, the next she was running her fingertips along the grooves of Miu's knuckles. She found that Miu's hands were cold.
What was that old saying? Cold hands, warm heart. Well, that just fit Miu perfectly. Who had a warmer, softer heart than Miu?
The woman in question looked down at Lena's wandering hands. When Miu turned back to look at Lena, she swore that the air disappeared from her lungs. Miu was even more beautiful when Lena was drunk.
"Hi," Miu said.
Lena grinned from ear to ear.
"Hi."
Whatever conversation Miu had been in was soon over with. Or maybe it had ended prematurely. Either way, Miu set her cider down before she leaned back against the couch. The two of them were laid back together, arm to arm, as the room spun above Lena.
Miu mused, "I didn't realise you were such a lightweight."
Almost pouting as she spoke, Lena said, "I don't make a habit of consuming alcohol unlike your friends."
"You make them sound like scoundrels," Miu said with a giggle.
Their voices were low, as if not to disturb the conversations around them.
No. That was wrong. Their voices were low because this was their own little, private bubble and they didn't want any unwanted ears listening in. At least, that's how Lena felt.
"You're the only scoundrel I see." Lena said as she booped her nose, adding, "Complaining about how your phi rescues you from the jaws of peer pressure. Tch."
Miu's smile was soft and sweet. Just like her.
"My hero."
Lena's body felt so warm and tingly. It felt nice to have Miu pressed up against her like this. She liked having Miu's attention on her. She loved her rose perfume. She loved Miu's big, brown eyes.
"I'll always come to your rescue." Lena said, "Like… Batman?"
Miu giggled once more, asking, "Batman?"
Lena nodded as she furrowed her eyebrows, saying, "Yeah, he seems like your type. Dark. Brooding. Kinda beefy."
"I don't think that's my type at all."
Lena tilted her head.
"What is your type, Miu?"
They were so close now. Lena could see the shine of Miu's lip-gloss from here. She wasn't sure why she's looking there when she could just look up and see eyes in the loveliest shade of brown staring at her.
Miu faltered as her eyes roamed over Lena's face. Suddenly, she breathed out, "I… I'm gonna get you some water. Sober you up. OK?"
Lena immediately whined and tried to grab at Miu. She definitely didn't want her favourite nong to leave. Unfortunately her coordination was impaired from the alcohol and she failed to catch onto Miu before she slipped away. Like a slippery, little eel. Miu-eel. Meel.
Oh, well. Miu would be back soon.
At least, that's what Lena had thought. That didn't end up being the case, though.
Time ticked on. The minutes slipped by. Conversations continued with or without Miu, although that sounded horrific to Lena. And the longer it took for Miu to get back, the less needy and more anxious Lena felt. As a woman, your mind would always jump to the worst-case scenarios when it came to the safety and sanctity of your friends.
A thousand different thoughts passed through her mind, each more anxiety-inducing than the last.
As Lena bordered on tachycardic, she decided she had waited long enough. It had been all of six minutes but she was already experiencing symptoms of withdrawal.
It was time for mission 'Nong Retrieval'.
Lena maintained her dignity as she rose to her feet and exited the couch bubble. She did not stumble nor falter! A great and mighty feat!
She headed in the direction of Miu… wherever she may be. Lena's remaining cognitive function allowed her to deduce that Miu would likely be headed for the kitchen: water, tap, glass. Triple ticks there. So the kitchen was where Lena went.
She passed by throngs of sweaty people, a few couples making out, and one person vomiting into a nearby plant. Gross. She sent a small prayer of recovery to that poor plant.
When she eventually found her way to the kitchen, she did find Miu.
As well as Narong. The devil himself.
Time slowed around her. All she could concentrate on was the sight in front of her. Miu was standing there looking at her ex-boyfriend. Her expression wasn't one of hatred or disgust or even anger.
It was fucking concern.
Lena knew that Miu was a soft-hearted person. She knew that Miu was a bundle of sunshine and that she always sought the good in people. But of all people, why would she look so fucking concerned about him? The asshole who cheated on her so openly? The one who kept crawling back as if he expected Miu to roll over like some doormat?
She didn't wait for a single second longer. Lena was almost afraid that the longer she waited, the sooner Miu's concern might melt into something like forgiveness. There was no chance in hell that Lena would allow that to happen. She marched towards Miu with her head held high and with a flick of her hair over her shoulder.
The moment she got close to Narong, she shoulder-checked him without ever looking back. It sounded like a parrot squawking behind her when he made a noise of complaint. She ignored him.
Instead, she headed straight for Miu. The same Miu who's gaze left Narong and settled on Lena.
Exactly as it should be. Miu should never look at Narong again.
Without hesitation, Lena pulled Miu in for a hug. She knew exactly what she was doing: she was rubbing this in Narong's face. Look what I can do and you can't, kind of thing. She felt no remorse and no shame.
Sulking, Lena whined, "You lied to me."
Was it unbecoming for a phi to whine to her nong like this in public? Yes. Did Lena care? No.
Miu murmured, "Phi?"
"You told me you were going to get water." Lena said, adding with a little venom, "I didn't know you had to consult the water buffalo first to get it."
She didn't care anymore. The alcohol loosened her tongue. Any rudeness could be blamed on that.
"Don't say that!" Miu said as she pulled away.
But even as she scolded Lena, it looked like Miu was struggling not to laugh. She was clearly entertained by Lena's drunken rudeness. Lena couldn't help but grin at Miu.
"Why shouldn't I say it?" Lena asked, gripping onto Miu's arms to stay upright, "I can't control my mouth. That happens at parties. Sometimes you lose control of your mouth and you end up sucking the face of someone that isn't your girlfriend. Oh, wait. No, I've never done that."
With a dramatic little head turn, Lena looked back and shot daggers at him. At least, she hoped it was a glare; Lena wasn't sure if her face was actually cooperating.
From what she could make out of Narong's facial expression, he was stuck between anger and confusion at this strange interaction.
Sneering, Lena asked, "What are you looking at? Do you have something to say?"
He didn't even address her. Little shit. He just turned back to Miu and asked, "Miu, can we just—"
"Don't talk to her. You don't get that right anymore, idiot. You lost that chance," Lena snarled.
She wondered if he recognised her voice. Probably not, considering it was hard to hear yourself think with the music so loud. he was probably just as overstimulated as them.
Lena felt an awful lot like a guard dog. She hoped she looked intimidating or cool like a Husky or a Belgian Malinois, rather than a Chihuahua. Miu was already pulling Lena away at this stage while Narong could only look on hopelessly.
Whatever moment had developed between them was effectively ruined by Lena's appearance and behaviour. Which was excellent news in Lena's book.
"Come on, phi." Miu said, almost coaxing her, "Don't worry about him."
Lena scoffed and asked, "Why would I be worried about a boy like him?"
Emphasis on boy. Younger than Lena. Immature. It sounded cooler in her head, to be honest. She might've said more but she was terribly drunk and could only allow herself to be dragged along by her nong. Miu was unnecessarily strong, after all, and Lena's body felt particularly boneless now.
Narong was left in the dust behind them. Lena was glad for that, at least.
Miu led her away to a place that was a little quieter, which Lena grateful for. It was roughly back where they first started. She hoped they were somewhere near the couch; Lena's phone was somewhere stuffed into Miu's purse and her purse was probably wedged into the couch. Or stolen. God, she hoped not.
As they stood in their little corner, Miu tucked some hair behind Lena's ear and asked, "Are you OK, phi?"
Lena smiled and said, "I'm great. I've been waiting to chew out that worm for ages."
"He was trying to apologise," Miu replied.
That sounded a little too close to sympathy. Or worse: defending him.
"I don't give a fuck if he was trying to grow wings." Lena grumbled, her hackles raised up, "He could apologise until he cried tears of blood for all I care. Don't you dare forgive him. He's only sorry cause he got caught."
It was way too hot in this room. Lena wished she was back in her bedroom with the air conditioning cranked up. She wished she was still laying on that couch with Miu. She wished she could steal every memory of Narong out of Miu's brain and toss it into the ocean.
"Maybe. But forgiving him doesn't mean I wanna be with him. It would just be closure," Miu said rather diplomatically.
"Doesn't matter. Don't forgive him. Can you do that for your phi? Please, Miu?"
Vaguely, Lena knew that she was sulking pathetically. She held Miu's hand against her sternum. She held it close as if she could press Miu's hand against her heart and convey her desperation. As if Miu could feel how sincerely her heart was beating under her palms.
God, this was exactly why Lena didn't drink.
She just needed Miu to keep some distance from him. Emotional distance. And physical. Both would be great, actually.
Lena stared up at Miu with an expression she hoped conveyed the appropriate emotion. What emotion exactly? Who knew?
She watched as Miu chewed lightly on her bottom lip as she looked down at Lena. It was all too much for Lena's little heart. In a fit of cute aggression, Lena reached up and cupped Miu's cheeks, squishing her face like a baby.
"You're so cute, Miu. You're so fucking pretty, too. Why don't you think you're pretty?" Lena asked, her voice twisting into a whine.
She meant every word, too. Why couldn't Miu see what everyone else saw? Why couldn't see she what Lena saw?
Miu was staring up at her with the strangest expression. Then, she said, "I'm taking you home."
Now that was a fantastic idea.
Lena counted all of her lucky stars. Thank god her roommate was such a party animal. That woman would likely be gone all night only to turn up home in a couple days and in a completely different outfit. God bless her.
During the grab ride over, Miu and Lena had gone through an intense negotiation period. You see, they had conflicting ideas on where they were going. Miu had insisted on bringing Lena back to her own home. Understandably, Lena vehemently rejected that idea: Miu's house meant that Miu's parents would be there. And if her parents were there, that meant that they would see Lena looking like this.
Absolutely not. Lena refused to let this be their first impression of her.
Luck was on her side today. Lena managed to convince Miu to take her back to her place, and for Miu to stay the night. She argued that they would have the place to themselves. She also argued that Miu would get a sleepover out of this whole ordeal.
Apparently the cuddling really sealed the deal for her because Miu immediately agreed.
This was fine. Girls did this kind of stuff all the time. It's just a sleepover between friends. Lena had done it with so many of her girl friends over the years. Why would it be any different with Miu? Miu, and her big, beautiful eyes that were still staring at Lena.
That being said, Lena did end up tipping the grab driver because of her behaviour in his car.
…She might have been a little too drunk. Lena vaguely remembered practically laying on top of Miu and alternating between cursing Narong and his future generations, and complimenting Miu.
("Promise me you won't get back with him."
"I already promised you that, Lalee. I'm not interested in him."
"OK, good. Because you could do so much better. You're gorgeous. You're too good for that jackass. You're too good for, like, everyone in our uni."
"You're so drunk. This is totally my fault."
"You say that but look how big you're grinning.")
It was all a big blur until this very moment in time.
Lena was sprawled out on her own couch. She knew the feel of it by now and the distinct smell of her apartment: lavender and sea salt. She couldn't possibly forget it since she installed that damn diffuser herself.
Above her, Miu was hovering over her and dragging a warm, wet towel across the exposed parts of Lena's body. Lena didn't exactly remember how she ended up on this couch — she remembered Miu forcing her to get dressed. It was hard to forget when someone locked you in your own room and prevented you from seeing them, all the while demanding you get dressed.
If she remembered correctly, Miu had said something like: "I'm not letting you out until you get dressed. Otherwise I'm going home and leaving you here."
So how could Lena, an innocent victim, do anything except meet these egregious demands?
At some point Lena had been deposited onto this couch like a sack of potatoes. Any complaints or criticisms died in her throat, though, when Miu brought out the bowl of water, soapy water. Lena had been stunned into silence as Miu pampered and cleaned her.
Miu's eyebrows were pinched together in concentration as she worked. Every now and then a lock of her hair would slip out and hang freely; Lena would watch in astonishment as Miu reached up and tucked it behind her ear. It was better than any sunset.
Lena had never in her life experienced something like this. Not with previous boyfriends or lovers, and not even from her own parents. She had only ever seen a scene like this in a romance movie.
…not that this was necessarily romantic. Miu was just being kind to her.
Besides, this whole thing started because Lena refused to take a shower.
("I'm not showering, Miu."
"You stink. You've been out to a party with sweaty, stinky people and you smell like alcohol."
"That's OK, I'll change my sheets tomorrow."
"At least do your skincare and rinse your body."
"Do you want me to slip and fall and die in the shower, Miu? Is this the love my nong has for me?"
"I'm this close to hosing you down with the kitchen tap."
"Try me.")
The compromise had been the wipe-down with soapy water.
Miu had kindly removed all of Lena's makeup, too. Lena never experienced that either. As Miu continued to clean her, Lena fluttered her eyelids closed and melted into Miu's touch. It felt amazing. It felt even better getting out of those clothes and into her usual pyjamas.
"Who wears so little to sleep?" Miu grumbled, mostly to herself.
She was probably referring to the slip Lena dressed herself in. As usual, Miu was the biggest enemy when it came to Lena's sleepwear. Less was more in Lena's humble opinion.
Lena grinned and asked, "Don't I look pretty?"
"Of course you do. That's not the problem."
Lena grinned as wide as a drunk could when they couldn't feel their face. Should she be able to feel her face?
As Miu continued to grumble under her breath, Lena's eyes slid open once more. She found that she just couldn't look away from her nong. The soap smelled nice and she almost regretted not showering but… if she had showered, Miu wouldn't have done this for her. Lena would never get to experience this. Maybe this was destiny working in mysterious ways.
"Did you ever do this for him?" Lena asked, her voice low and husky.
The words slipped out of her mouth before she could stop them. She wanted the answer desperately and she was equally afraid of it.
Miu's hands stopped moving. She stared down at Lena for a moment, pressing the wet towel against Lena's shoulder.
Finally, Miu murmured, "I haven't done this for anyone."
Lena stared up at her. It was hard to do so while being so drunk but she persevered. She just struggled to read Miu's expression when the world kept spinning like this.
Lena whispered, "I'm glad."
She wasn't sure why she was glad. She really wasn't. She just knew that she loved being treated so tenderly like this. Not just by anyone, but by Miu specifically. She wanted to be the only one with these exclusive rights.
"Come on," Miu murmured as she set the towel aside, "let's get you into bed."
Lena felt herself being scooped up by Miu into strong, warm arms. She did her best to assist Miu in standing to her feet. A difficult task since her legs had turned to jelly.
It was hard to think when you're so drunk. One moment Lena was sprawled out on the couch, the next she was flopping face down into her own bed. She vaguely felt herself being rolled onto her back and the blankets being draped over her. It felt nice to be tucked into bed like a child.
Lena tried her best to dwell on her thoughts as the night moved around her. She wanted to stare at Miu more but between the darkness and her drunken stupor, it was a losing battle.
In this state, all she had was her own thoughts. So Lena just kept thinking. She turned over each thought in her mind, examining it from each angle.
Why did Lena want to be the only one? Why would she care if Miu ever cared for someone so tenderly, not just her evil ex? Why did it make Lena nauseous to think of Miu wiping down someone and helping them get dressed, tending to them like a lo—
…Oh, fuck.
The gears clicked into place but the realisation was far too much for her inebriated brain — moments later, Lena's brain switched off and the world went dark.