Archive of Our Own

Chapter Text

Left foot, right foot, left foot, right foot…

“OH FUCK, OH FUCK, OH FUCK, OH FUCK, OH FUCK!” Morty yelled as he ran. A goose equivalent of Cerberus chased after him. It was maybe thrice as taller than him, and ready to kill. In Morty’s hands, was a huge golden egg.

Today’s adventure was a bit more magical. 

“K-KEEP RUNNING, MORTY! YOU’RE ALMOST THERE! JUST HEAD STRAIGHT!” Rick's voice called out from a distance.

Rick said it’d be a little short, magic trip. They’d climb a huge beanstalk, grab a golden egg that laid inside a huge house on top of the clouds, guarded by a giant, then dip. Morty had asked him “Isn’t this just ripping off Jack and the Beanstalk?” And Rick replied “Morty, it’s NOTHING like Jack and the Beanstalk. T-this is something completely new and unheard of!”

Morty thinks he understands now, since the giant wasn’t just a huge human or an ogre. It was a three-headed feathered demon.

“RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIICK!!!” He yelled on top of his lungs. His legs were getting tired, and the heavy egg he held wasn’t doing him any favors. The geese honked simultaneously behind him, and he’s pretty sure one of the heads screeched.

Despite being literally chased to death at the moment, Morty couldn’t help but think this was vaguely familiar. He felt like he was experiencing a déjà vu over this. Carrying something important, with a huge beast on his tail…

Oh. This is the exact thing he went through with Evil Morty while hunting for crystals to power up the mansion.

“MORTY! ARE YOU LISTENING?!”

Morty picked up the pace again, brushing those thoughts away. Out of every single moment he could think about this, now is not the time. “Y-YEAH! I AM!”

“GOOD! Just keep running in this direction! Come over here!” He heard Rick’s voice from a distance. “Morty, duck!”

“D-duck?! It’s a goose chasing me!”

Rick groaned. “NOT LIKE THAT, MORTY! DUCK! JUMP AND GET DOWN!”

“Oh!” Morty said. “W-when?!”

“NOW, MORTY! NOW!” Morty did as told, and got down. He knelt and jumped towards the ground, holding the egg with care to make sure it wouldn’t get away from his grasp. He landed on the ground and spun around on the grass.

The three-headed beast following him abruptly stopped, and suddenly, it was cubed into a ton of million pieces. But it disappeared with a “poof” instead of having its chunks of meat fall down to the ground. Morty supposes this is the good part about the fairytale: gore free.

A bush near Morty shook, and Rick’s head popped out of it. “Alright, Morty! My trap worked! We did it!” He stood up from his hiding spot, and walked his way towards Morty, cleaning off the dust on the hem of his pants while doing so. “High-five!” Rick extended his open hand towards Morty.

Morty breathed heavily on the floor, with the egg on top of his stomach, uncomfortably crushing him since it was pretty heavy. He slowly put one hand up, and Rick slapped his palm. “Oh yeah, what a rush!”

“W-what do we even need this egg for anyway?” Morty asked between breaths, sweat attached uncomfortably to his shirt and forehead like a second layer of skin.

“So we can eat it, duh.” Rick said as if it were obvious, taking something from his coat’s pocket. “Never wondered what it’d be like to eat a golden egg?”

“What?!” Morty abruptly sat up. “So I almost died just so we can eat this? I-I thought you were gonna sell it, or something!”

“Animals fight to death to get their grubby little paws on some food, Morty. You should check your privilege.” Rick finally pulled out what he was looking for inside his extended pockets. It was about the length of a middle-finger of the average human male. It was also hot-pink, and it looked like a kazoo in Morty’s eyes.

Suddenly, Rick put it in his lips and took a deep breath, before exhaling some very colorful smoke. It looked like stardust, or that one telepathic fart that Morty killed ages ago. It also smelled pretty good, like industrialized strawberries- wait a second, Rick is smoking?

Morty raised an eyebrow, perplexed. “W-what is that? You vape now?!”

“Okay, Morty. First of all, it’s not a ‘vape’, it’s like some other shit. S-second of all, have some respect! This is the alien equivalent of a cigar, which is way cooler and more fitting for my age. Not like you would get it.” Rick said as he took another drag. He blew the smoke off his lips, and not even half of what came out earlier left now.

Rick coughed. “What the fuck?” He shook his pseudo-vape for a good two seconds, then looked at it disappointedly. “Oh, great. It’s over now.” He threw it towards the bush he was hiding at earlier, then turned to Morty. “Come on, Morty. We’ll eat that egg when we get home, but right now grandpa needs his space vapes.”

Morty grunted as he stood up, still carefully holding the egg while doing so to make sure he didn't drop it. “So now it’s a vape?!” He asked as he opened the door to Rick’s spaceship and hopped on his seat, with the heavy item on his lap.

“I didn’t feel like saying ‘alien equivalent of a cigar’ again. Too long, too boring.” Rick said as he adjusted his mirror. “Okay, everything set. Let’s goooooo!!!” He said, putting a fist in the air.

This blows. Morty thought, but sighed and put on his seatbelt. This is going to be a long ride.

Rick landed on one of the spots of the parking lot and hopped out of the car. Morty unfastened the seatbelt and turned his head to face Rick. “Uh… Do I have to bring the egg along with us?”

“No, just keep it under your seat so nobody tries to steal it.” Rick said, then closed the door. Morty did as Rick told him, he took the egg in his hands and put it under his seat. Or at least tried to, there were a lot of beer bottles there as well, barely making any space for the golden egg. Morty just shoved it in there and hopped out of the car.

The parking lot was kind of empty, with just one other car around. Presumably the owner’s. Morty thought it was kind of silly for Rick to ask him to hide the egg, but whatever. Better safe than sorry anyway.

They began to walk towards the front door of the shop. It just looked like the average convenience store, but there were lots of signs mentioning discounts and all the new stuff that came in recently all over the display window, which Morty could barely see the actual items inside.

The automatic door swung open as they approached, Rick stepped inside and Morty followed. With the sound of the door chiming, cold air washed over the two of them, which made Morty feel a bit more refreshed. He sighed, and grabbed his collar in order to ventilate himself. He was still a bit sweaty from being chased earlier, and the AC in Rick’s car didn’t do him any favors, so Morty is taking what he can get.

“Alright, Morty, stay close. I’m just buying this, then we can go.” Rick said, then began to walk his way towards the slug-like vendor, who greeted him with “Welcome! What can I do for you today?”

“Yeah, yeah… Alright.” Morty replied, not really paying attention. He smiled in pure, ignorant bliss for a few seconds, but it was only a matter of time before he started to get cold. So he let go of his shirt and stepped away from the air curtain.

He glanced at Rick, who was talking to the clerk. “Look, I don’t want any of this…” Rick gestured at the counter. “Whatever bullshit you’re selling. Just get me the space cigar thingy! The pink one!” 

“But you can get 49.9% off if you buy this sexy dashboard doll!” The clerk replied, and grabbed said item. He held it up to Rick’s face and tapped its head, making it move. Rick crossed his arms. “Go on…”

Well, he’s in his own little world. Morty looked around the store. There was a large variety of stuff someone could get, from fridge magnets, to costumes, and apparently space vapes, since it’s the reason why they got here in the first place.

Morty decided to go into the costume section.

It wasn’t really a section, more like a random part of the store. There were creepy mannequins all around with various attires. At the end of the mannequin hallway, stood a mirror.

Morty turned around to mess with the fabric of a princess dress. He was kind of bored, and there wasn’t really anything else to do. He’s got a new phone he can play with, but he doesn’t feel like messing with it right now. He doesn’t want Rick to call him an addict whenever he calls for him anyway.

He stopped fiddling with the fabric, and tried to look for something else to mess with. He was mindlessly checking out the outfits by touching them, but being careful while doing so. Morty doesn’t want to accidentally push one of them and destroy everything in the shop.

Morty sighed and put his hands on the side. Man, this is boring. Maybe he’ll get less bored at the mug section, or literally anywhere else. He could also try to look for something that would interest him and maybe bring it back home.

As Morty spun to the opposite way to leave, something caught his eye: a pirate mannequin.

He stopped in his tracks and looked at it for a few seconds, as if he were under a spell. There wasn’t anything special about it, it was just the average pirate outfit. The most notable thing about it would easily be the hat, with a human skull on the front, and a wine red feather on the back.

But that wasn’t the thing Morty paid attention to. His focus was on the eyepatch.

Morty stared at it with no emotion, mouth slightly agape. The eyepatch was simple and plain, it didn’t have any drawings on it or anything else. It was just a common black pirate eyepatch.

Just like Evil Morty’s.

Morty stiffened up, his hands clenching involuntarily. Just great. First, he was being chased by a huge monster like he used to be when he and Evil Morty went crystal hunting, now this? It’s like the multiverse itself was taunting him at this point.

But it’s not good to think about stuff like this early in the morning. They lived together for a while, then Morty left. It’s already over, so Morty shouldn’t really care about this anymore. It was an one-off thing anyway. He should really stop thinking about him.

So now, he’s going to walk away and pretend this pirate costume didn’t faze him. Out of sight, out of mind.

“...”

Yet, his body betrayed him. Morty’s hands reached for the mannequin’s head, he took the pirate hat in one hand, then grabbed the eyepatch with the other, and began to pull it out of its face.

Morty put the pirate hat on the same mannequin, and with the eyepatch in hand, he began to make his way towards the mirror. He looked at himself for a couple of seconds, and with a glint of hesitation, he lifted the eyepatch up.

He gently put the accessory on his face while making full eye contact with himself. When he was done, Morty put his hands away from his face to see his new look. The eyepatch covered his left eye, which struck Morty as odd before adjusting it once more, making it cover his right eye.

Morty kept his covered eye closed and gazed into the mirror. He let out a shaky breath and turned his head around to take a better look at his face from other angles, while still keeping eye contact with himself.

Eventually, he stopped moving and just stared. Before Morty could even register his own actions, his hand slowly flew up to his left cheek. His fingers lightly brushed his thumb on his own skin, as if he were caressing it.

There’s no way Evil Morty would ever let him do that. He pried away from most physical contact and would flinch most of the times Morty did something as simple as tapping his shoulder. But it’d depend, right? There were times Evil Morty welcomed that kind of stuff.

Morty leaned into his own touch, pressing his cheek against his palm.

He remembered the conversation they had at the bench, the way Evil Morty had looked at him, and most importantly, the light touch of his fingers against his own… Morty wondered what would’ve happened if they went in that direction for a little longer. If Evil Morty had scooted a bit closer. If Morty hadn’t opened his big mouth…

… If Rick hadn’t shown up.

Morty snapped out of his trance, dropping his hand in an instance. His cheeks reddened in embarrassment, despite having no one near him to witness this. But, God, what was he thinking?

He grabbed the eyepatch and instantly took it off his face as if he were just caught doing something bad. Morty’s heart beat a little faster than usual, and his eyes widened. He really shouldn’t be doing this. If the multiverse threw stuff that resembled Evil Morty to his face, then Morty would have to steer away from it somehow, not welcome it.

Morty stood still, recollecting his thoughts. This was weird. This was really weird. He can’t keep doing this, staring into mirrors like a freak. It was bad enough whenever he went to the bathroom in his house.

He took a deep breath, then looked at the eyepatch in his hand. Evil Morty is no longer part of his life, he should just move on and stop thinking about him.

“Why’d you even come with me? To throw a tantrum? To make a point? To see if Rick cared only to come back crawling to his arms?!” 

Evil Morty’s words rang inside his head. Morty’s face twisted uncomfortably, his hand closing around the eyepatch. They left things on a bad note, Morty chose to leave, and Evil Morty got mad. Well, fuck him. Morty doesn’t even care anymore. He’s back to classic Rick and Morty adventures, just like he was meant to be.

But still… Morty’s shoulders hunched, feeling small.

He wants to stop caring. He wants to stop thinking about it. Stop reminiscing about the time they spent together… But he can’t. Morty physically can’t stop himself from recalling his “vacation” with Evil Morty, as Rick called it.

And every time he does, it hurts. Whenever Morty is feeling a bit better, he remembers their last conversation, and his mood drops. He feels as if guilt was literally eating him alive, and Morty doesn’t understand. Why does he feel guilty? He did the right thing.

He screwed up like Rick did, then made the mistake of leaving him behind. Morty is no better than Rick for also leaving him, so how come Morty feels twice as awful now than when he left Rick behind?

Maybe some things are better left unresponded.

“...orty? Moooorty?” Rick called out from a few feet away, coming closer. Morty blinked, straying away from his thoughts. Oh, shit. He was still holding the eyepatch. In an instant, Morty threw the eyepatch on the floor and kicked it away under one of the princess dresses.

Rick showed up with two shopping bags in one hand. “Oh, great. There you are. You’re so short I barely saw you in the middle of these mannequins.” He looked at the side and jumped back when he saw the pirate mannequin. “Jesus!-” He placed a hand on his chest, before letting out a breath. “Okay, this just got creepy. Let’s go, Morty”

Morty frowned at the “short” comment from Rick, and began to follow him towards the exit. He took one last look at the eyepatch, which peeked out from under the princess skirt.

“Moooooooorty! Did you not hear me?! We’re leaaaviiiiiing!”

Morty huffed. “I’m going! Jeez…”

The cashier waved at them with a big smile as they stepped out of the store. As soon as they did, Rick handed the two bags to Morty. “Hold these for me.”

Morty took the shopping bags and raised an eyebrow. Didn’t Rick come in here to buy just one thing? He peeked inside to see a bunch of dashboard dolls. Humans, aliens and literally anything else from all genders. Morty put a hand inside to grab one of them, a baseball with toned legs wearing a revealing green bikini.

“Ugh…” He grimaced before putting it back in. “Uh, Rick? What’s up with all of these dolls? I-I thought we were going to buy you a space vape, cigar thingy.”

Rick took his keys and turned around to face Morty. “Oh, that? There wasn’t any. But these dolls were on such a great deal, I couldn’t just let it pass.” He said, turning on the vehicle. “Also, I’m kinda over vaping now. That stuff got old pretty quickly.”

Morty wanted to facepalm, but with both of his hands occupied, he just sighed instead. He made his way to the passenger’s seat and put one of the bags to the side to open the door, since Rick doesn’t have the decency to open the door for him.

Evil Morty probably would’ve shut up.

All Morty wanted to do right now was to go home, maybe play some videogames. Yeah, that sounds good. It’ll keep him distracted enough to not think about his life just a few weeks ago. With that, Morty’s shoulders relaxed a bit, and he threw the bags under his seat.

CRACK!

Morty froze on the spot. What the hell was that sound? Did something break?! Did the golden egg break? No, it can’t be. That thing had a pretty tough shell, not to mention how heavy it was. There’s no way it could break that easily.

Rick slowly turned his head. “Morty, what was that?”

“Uhhh…” Morty stammered. “It’s probably nothing!” He said, and peeked under the car seat. Please be one of the bottles, please be one of the bottles… He thought, but much to Morty’s demise, it had been the egg.

The golden egg, once beautiful and smooth, now had a crack on it. The egg white and yolk, which was literally shining, began to overflow Rick’s car, and by extent, dirtying everything else on the floor. Including the new dolls Rick just bought.

Rick sniffed, feeling the smell of an egg. It wasn’t rotten, of course, but the natural smell isn’t something he’d want to smell either. “What the fuck, Morty?! Did you just break the egg?!”

“I-I forgot! I didn’t know it was that fragile!”

“It’s an EGG, Morty! Of course it’s as fragile as you think it is!” Rick said, then banged his head against the wheel, causing a huge honk. “Fuck!” He said, opening the door in a fit and getting out of the car. “Morty, get out of the car! I need to clean this since you fucked it up!”

Morty begrudgingly hopped out of the car, more bashful than anything. “I’m sorry, Rick! I swear I didn’t know!”

“But that’s the thing, Morty. You always ‘don’t know’!” Rick said, opening the trunk of his car to see if he can find some gadget to solve this. “God, I ask you to do one thing…” He grumbled under his breath, rummaging around.

Morty frowned, looking dejected. He grabbed the edge of his shirt, embarrassed. Morty was really out of his game today, he was careless. Daydreaming during adventures, messing up, spending more time looking in the mirror than he’d like to admit… It’s honestly degrading.

He wanted to apologize again, but the words died in his throat. Morty immediately remembered Evil Morty’s words again “You really are built for forgiveness.” 

Morty scowled, closing his fists. “Shut up…” He mumbled. 

“What?” Rick called out. Morty’s eyes immediately widened. Oh shit, did he say that out loud? “Uhm..! N-nothing! I was just talking to myself!” Morty responded a bit too quickly.

Rick gave him a confused look, but left it at that. “Weirdo.”

Morty almost let out a sigh. He’s glad Rick didn’t notice, he hopes he doesn’t ask any questions either. Because how would Morty even respond?! Rick would just take it as an inconvenience and erase Morty’s memory, or whatever.

Morty’s grip on the edge of his shirt tightened. The day after Rick and Morty came back home, Rick had asked if Morty wanted to erase his memories of Evil Morty. Morty had asked him not to, and he’s glad that Rick listened to him for once.

He had been stepping on eggshells a couple of days after they came back, but Morty can see him go back to normal. Just like day, it’s only a matter of time before it’s night again. Morty can’t help but be afraid of this… Afraid of Rick. Afraid of the power his grandpa has over his life.

As much as Morty hates thinking about Evil Morty and all the shit he said right now, he doesn’t want it to be erased. He wants to talk about it, to vent his feelings out from the moment he left Rick to the time he came back to him. 

But there’s nobody to talk to. 

Maybe Summer would care, but she’d probably talk about it to her friends. Morty doesn’t want that. Beth would likely confront Rick, but Morty thinks that Rick wouldn’t think twice about erasing both of their memories to avoid a fight. Morty doesn’t want that either. Jerry… No offense to his father, but what would Jerry even do? Yell “hey!” And get mindblown as well?

So Morty just has to suck it up and live with this until he doesn’t care anymore. A secret that only he and his grandpa know of, and keep pretending like everything is just fine and dandy. It might be for Rick, but it isn’t for him. Is Morty just supposed to move on without any closure? He had one friend, and it was himself, and he lost him. He managed to lose himself.

And for what? Morty hasn’t even been having any fun in these adventures. At least once a day he ponders about Evil Morty. The memories eat him alive, thinking about how Morty will likely never speak to him again leaves a bad taste in his mouth.

He wished he could go back to the past- well, he can, but it wouldn’t be worth it. Morty would probably get arrested by time cops, and fuck up the timelines as well. If only he could retrace his footsteps, and maybe break things off in a better way… Maybe Morty wouldn’t be feeling like this.

A deep sigh exhaled from Morty’s mouth, as if he had been holding it in for the whole day, and he probably was. Suddenly, all of his thoughts stopped for a moment, being replaced by a single sentence.

Oh, man. I fucked up.

With the sound of the truck closing, Morty jerked back to the present. Rick had grabbed something circular, and by opening the door, he threw it inside. The tiny ball absorbed the egg’s fluid like a sponge. When it was done, Rick took the ball and put it in his pocket.

“God, finally.” Rick stepped inside the car. “Morty! I-I cleaned it up! It’s all good now!”

Morty swiftly turned around, mind still buzzing, but he had to look normal. “Y-yeah… Coming!” He made his way to the car and fastened his seatbelt, slumping against the seat. Rick noticed his grandson’s dejected look.

He cleared his throat. “Y’know… The egg is stored inside the ball and I can take it out anytime. We can still eat it, if you want.” Rick said, as a weak attempt to try and cheer up Morty.

“No, thanks.” That’s gross. Morty wanted to add, but kept his mouth shut. He gazed out the window, pressing his hand against his cheek. “I-I’ll just eat something else when we get home.” Maybe not, he’s not really that hungry anyway.

Rick gave him a weird look, but shrugged. “More for me, then.” With that, he started up the ship and began to drive away from the shop, with Morty looking at the stars and other planets from outside more than he usually does. 

Morty is acting weird, he has been acting weird, but Rick thinks it’s better to not ask. Instead, he gripped the wheel and put on some music for the ride.

Rick parked in front of the garage, and didn’t waste any time by getting out of his car. Morty stayed inside for a few seconds, before lazily unfastening his seatbelt and hopping out of the ship. 

Morty stepped into the garage with slumped shoulders. Looking out the window while you’re in the car and thinking about anything wasn’t the best choice, apparently. Meanwhile, Rick was putting the ball from earlier on a little platform that made it float. Morty was unsure why Rick was doing this, but he assumes it’s for cleaning up or something, so he doesn’t bother asking.

Rick checked the time with his phone. “Morty, I’m gonna be busy now, d-don’t bother me. I’ll cook this egg later when it’s all clean.” Morty was right on the money.

“Okay.” Morty replied with a deadpan tone. He doesn’t care about this. He doesn’t care about the egg or whatever Rick is going to do right now. He just wants to rest.

Morty walked out of the garage, closing the door behind him as he did. It’s afternoon on a weekday, Friday to be specific, so he missed school again. He knows his mom is at work, but his dad was nowhere in sight, but Morty thinks that he’s probably in his man cave watching TV or up in his bedroom doing whatever unemployed people do. 

After walking a few steps, he spotted Summer on the couch, messing with her phone. Well, there goes his free space on the couch. Ugh, whatever. He’s too lazy to go upstairs or take a shower right now, he’ll do it later. Right now, he just wants to lay down.

So having to share the same area with his sister will have to doo.

Morty shuffled his way towards the couch, dragging his feet in each step. When he got there, he flopped on top of the couch, face slammed against the cushions. Too many thoughts and too many feelings to deal with. He didn’t even have the energy to distract himself with videogames, that’s how bad it is.

“You look like shit.” Summer pointed out, flickering her glance from her little brother to her phone. Morty responded with a muffled groan, further confirming her statement. “Bad adventure, I’m assuming?”

Morty turned his face to the side. “All of them are.” He said with his cheek pressed against the couch.

“Uh-huh.” Summer replied, still very entranced to her phone screen. Morty laid there, numb, and occasionally grunting and making other weird sounds as if he was waking up on an early school day.

“Oh my God, what?” Summer asked, finally shifting her full attention to Morty. She knows he wants attention, she just doesn’t feel like giving him any.

“Are you not even going to ask me how my adventure was? What kind of sister are you?”

“The kind of sister that has better things to do.” Morty huffed by that response, Summer rolled her eyes. “Okay, fine. How was the adventure, Morty?”

“Terrible!”

“Right.” Summer said in a deadpan tone. “See? This is why I didn’t want to ask, because when I do, you’re always complaining like a little bitch.”

“I almost died today.”

“You always do.” She picked up her phone again. Damn it, Morty was losing her. This conversation didn’t make him feel any better, but he didn’t want to talk about Evil Morty to Summer either. She’ll probably talk about it to her friends and stuff… But it’s still painful.

Morty weighed his options. He either asks his sister for advice, or he keeps suffering in silence.

Whatever. He thought, then sat up on the couch. “S-Summer, there’s something I need to talk to you about.”

“Right.” She said, still texting on her phone. “What is it?”

“I… Uhm…” Morty stammered, unsure how to begin. “D-do you remember that adventure I went with Rick on?”

Summer’s eyebrows furrowed. “You gotta be more specific.”

“When I turned forty.”

“How could I forget? You bought drugs for me and my friends. That’s, like, the coolest thing you’ve ever done.”

“Right.” Morty scowled. “So, um…” He scratched the back of his neck awkwardly. “W-what if I told you that our dog world adventure was a lie?”

“I’d say ‘Yeah, I know’.”

Morty’s eyes widened. “You do?!”

“Duh.” Summer sat up as well, no longer slouching against the couch. “Morty, no one spends three weeks away from home in a stupid dog world. Also, I saw the little space capsule you guys used to get here. It couldn’t be more obvious.”

“... Mom and dad didn’t notice.”

She shrugged. “That’s their problem. So, what really happened after you turned 14 again?” Summer rested her face against the palm of her hand, with a more curious look.

Morty shifted uncomfortably on his seat, avoiding eye contact. “Uh… The Citadel got destroyed.”

Summer’s raised an eyebrow. “Really?”

“Yeah.” Morty nodded. “I-it was a whole thing…”

“So, you guys were left stranded there, or what?”

“I wasn’t.” He said, growing a bit nervous. “... Rick was.”

“What? You left him there?!”

“Yeah…”

Summer’s eyes widened, the living room suddenly got very quiet. She stared at Morty as if he had just killed somebody right in front of her. Eventually, she spoke up. “What the fuck?! You ran away from home and didn’t even invite me?!"

“I-I forgot about my phone! I barely use it during adventures, and it ran out of battery anyway!”

“I can’t believe you were going to just leave me behind, asshole!” Summer punched him on the arm, earning an “OW!” from Morty. His hand immediately shot up to where his sister had punched him.

“Okay, whatever. Keep going.”

Morty rolled his eyes and still rubbed the now sore spot on his arm, but complied. “I got away from Rick with the help of myself from another universe, Evil Morty.” He paused. “He was also the one to destroy The Citadel and, uh, invite me to leave with him.”

Summer gave him a weird look. Okay, that was a bit of a loredrop, but one thing caught her attention. “Evil?”

“H-he’s called Evil Morty.” Morty explained. 

“Right.”

“So, long story short, I lived with him during the time me and Rick were out. We had a good time, but I chose to come back home with Rick when he showed u- OW!” Morty cut himself off by being punched by his sister on the same spot again.

He hissed. “S-SUMMER!”

“What? You deserve it, you dick!” Summer reprimanded. “You literally accepted to go away with him only to backtrack like a little pussy.”

“Fuck off…” Morty mumbled.

“Do you want me to punch you again?”

“No!”

“Good, then shut up.” She said, then her angry face turned into a more ‘knowing’ one. “On the other hand… Damn, Morty. You're out there breaking hearts, huh?” She pointed a finger at him, almost teasing, but with a hint of her genuinely being proud of her little brother.

Morty’s cheeks got a bit warmer, and he slapped Summer's hand away. “Shut up, it's not like that.”

“It kind of is, though.” She responded. “So, that's what you came to me for? Talk about boy problems? Except you're the boy problem.”

Morty honestly thought she would be more weirded out by this, but he's glad that Summer is chill so far. Maybe it's because of their moms… Or because she has this kind of conversation with her friends.

He looked away, gripping his jeans. “I-I’ve just been feeling like a jerk. I don't know what to do.”

Summer chuckled. “So, that's the reason why you've been acting like a zombie the past few weeks?”

He groaned. “Is it really that obvious..?”

“Yeah.” She nodded. “You look even more miserable than when Rick left you.” Morty frowned. Has he, really? He didn't even notice. Probably because he was too busy trying to ignore the guilt eating him alive.

Summer shifted on her seat. “Okay, stop moping. This isn't a lost cause, most jerks usually don't recognize the fact that they're jerks. Have you tried apologizing to him?”

Morty's eyes widened. “What?! No! Never! I can't go back, he'd kill me on the spot!”

Summer huffed. “Morty, I’m having a hard time trying to imagine how you, of all people, could be intimidating like this.”

“You don't know him! H-he’s plenty intimidating!”

“You think that because you're fourteen, and because he's another version of you!” She argued. “If I were in your place, I'd be sucking my own dick too.

Since he's another version of you, I really doubt that he wouldn't at least consider your apology… If you two were as close as you said you were.” Summer added, shoulders shrugging slightly.

Morty recalled everything that Evil Morty did until now, such as destroying an entire citadel and killing a bunch of Ricks and Mortys without looking back. “Y’think..?” He asked, a tinge of hope covering his tone.

“Better than that, I know.” Summer smiled smugly as if she knew what she was talking about. “You'll apologize and he'll end up crying and accepting your apology, and you'll two be friends again.”

He tried to imagine the scenario. Evil Morty crying seemed pretty out of character for him, and Morty can't really picture him doing so. But Summer's confidence was kind of intoxicating, and it made him feel a little better.

Still, it's not only that. “Yeah, but… I-it’s not like I can just talk to him. I don't have any way of contacting him or going to his house.”

Summer gave him a look. “You can always take grandpa Rick’s portal gun.” She suggested. Oh, yeah, of course. The portal gun. Rick took a few weeks to make a new one, but after the dinosaurs came to Earth, he finally finished it after a long “creative process”, as he calls it.

Point is, it's now done and being used in adventures like it was in the first place. Morty can't believe he hadn't considered this as one of the first few options, but again… 

“It’s always on Rick, I can't just take it.” Morty said, losing hope.

“Uh, yes you can.” Summer said. “I'll help you.”

Morty's eyebrows rose to his hairline. “R-really?!” He couldn't believe it. Summer was actually going to help him.

“Sure.” She said. “But I want something in return.”

There it is.

“Really, Summer?!”

“Yes, really. You think I do shit for free?”

Morty groaned, but gave in. “Okay, fine. W-what the hell do you want?”

Summer crossed her arms. “I want you to buy molly for me and my friends.”

“Again?!” Morty said, dragging out the word for a bit. “Y-You know I can't do that! I'm not forty anymore!”

“I don't care. No molly, no service, bitch.” Summer doubled down. “Find a way, do something. Sci-fi your way out of it, just bring me molly.”

“Ughhhh…” Morty considered, for a second, giving up on this. But he sighed and decided to take the deal. “Fine. I'll do it.”

Summer smiled. “Good.” She said, extending out the palm of her hand. “Pleasure doing business with you.”

He rolled his eyes, but shook her hand anyway. They put their hands away. “Okay, so what's the plan? H-h-how are we gonna do this?”

“There's no plan.” Summer stated, taking her phone again. “You're just gonna take grandpa Rick’s portal gun and go.”

“Summer!-”

“Let me finish!” Summer warned. “I'll give you this bit of info, but that's it. For about a week now, grandpa has been taking naps during the afternoon.”

Morty raised an eyebrow. “Really? I haven't even noticed that.”

“Yeah, because I keep everyone out while he does. He told me to.” She smirked. “Anyway, his little nap time has been around 5 PM everyday. He sleeps for, like, an hour, then wakes up.” So it's just like clockwork.

She snapped her fingers. “That's the moment you grab his portal gun.”

Morty furrowed his eyebrows. “That’s it? Seriously?! I can't believe I agreed to get you molly for this!”

“Well, you better get that molly. I already helped you.” Summer began to mess with her phone again. “If you don't, then I'll tell grandpa Rick you took his portal gun.”

She gave him a bored look. “Also, if I were you, I'd go and do that already. It's 5:03PM.”

Morty's eyes widened. Holy shit, he needs to get a move on. He already has less than an hour before Rick wakes up again. 

He abruptly stood up from his seat. “W-wait! Do you think I have time to shower?”

“NO TIME, MORTY! GO, GO, GO!” Summer commanded, and a jolt passed through Morty’s body. She's right, he'd only waste precious time by taking a shower and changing his clothes.

“AH, OKAY!” He began to run towards the garage. “Thanks, Summer! I-I’ll get you and your friends drugs and stuff!”

“Cool! Don't forget!” Summer called out. With the sound of the door closing and opening, she rested her feet on the couch, a smile plastered on her face as she opened her contacts list. Her phone rang for a few seconds, then she spoke up again.

“Hey, bitch. Guess who's getting molly for us again?”

Morty opened the door that led to the garage and peeked his head inside. Rick had  passed out on top of his workshop’s table, Morty could tell by the fact that he was snoring.

So Summer wasn't bullshitting him, that's good.

He walked into the garage, and gently closed the door behind him, making sure to not make any noise.

Morty took a few steps towards Rick, but hesitated. He recomposed himself by taking a deep breath, then making his way towards his grandpa once more.

It’ll be quick. He thought. Morty would be back before Rick knew it anyway, since he’d be asleep. He’ll just grab the portal gun, reconcile with Evil Morty, then come back and put the portal gun back to its original place like nothing ever happened.

Morty’s hand slowly reached for Rick’s pocket. He moved, and Morty flinched, thinking he had already woken up, but Rick relaxed again. Morty took that cue, and put his hand in Rick’s pocket, taking the portal gun in an instant. He couldn't try his luck any longer, otherwise Morty would be caught up in Rick's body tech.

Rick kept sleeping without a care in the world, which is good. Morty looked down at the portal gun before him, his face reflecting on the green fluid. He had taken Rick’s portal gun some time ago, when he left him for two crows, but Morty had been so depressed he didn’t really go anywhere else besides the spots Rick went, or to The Citadel to turn himself into a 40-year-old.

There are endless possibilities of where he could go next, he could even go to Boob World right now. But there’s one thing he’s focused on right now: Finding Evil Morty and apologizing to him… He can go to Boob World some other time, maybe with Evil Morty, if things went well.

One problem, though. Morty doesn’t really remember the exact coordinates that Evil Morty was. Shit, he hadn’t really thought this through. Still, Morty didn’t want to give up. He’s pretty sure he remembers some of the numbers, which nails down infinite possibilities to… More than a trillion ones.

He sighed. Well, okay, this is probably going to be more difficult than he thought it’d be, but Morty also got this far. He lifted his hand up, and began to punch down some coordinates. After pressing the button, a portal was shot out.

Morty took a single heroic step towards the portal, before looking back at Rick and the garage. He hesitated for a few seconds, but faced the portal again. It’s now or never.

With the gun hand, he stepped into the green swirly portal. What could even go wrong?

Things went wrong.

Morty’s time is almost up, and so far nothing. He hasn’t been able to even get close to finding Evil Morty’s oasis.

Try after try, and different options he could choose from interdimensional traveling, and nothing. Morty thought that he could at least get a clue on where to find him, but it was obviously no use. The location was in the middle of nowhere, and Morty didn’t even get the coordinates.

Morty’s last try was on a planet where all grass is red for some reason. He took a big sigh. This doesn’t even come close to Evil Morty’s oasis. He gazed down to the floor, utterly defeated. It’s almost 6 PM, Rick will wake up soon, and all Morty managed to do was crush his last few hopes.

This is really it. He forgot what the precise numbers and letters of Evil Morty’s location was, and now he can’t do anything about it.

He gazed at the portal gun with a depressed look in his eyes. A tear fell on it. Great, now Morty was crying. He knows there’s no use crying over spilled milk, but he can’t help but do so anyway. This is it. He lost his only friend, and has no means of even getting a bit of closure.

He sniffled, and wiped his eyes with the back of his hand. This had been a waste of time and hope. All he can do now is go home.

Morty was about to put in the coordinates for the dimension he was currently living on, but something caught his eye. The tiny red screen in Rick’s portal gun had a tinier button on the top left side of it, presented with a pin symbol. He raised an eyebrow, and slowly brought his hand up to select it.

The screen changed from the random timeline number input to various names, like a list. Morty squinted his eyes to see if he could read them a bit better. There were a lot of options to choose from, like “HOME”, “BOOGER AIDS 2”, “THAT 1 RESTAURANT”, “ORGY PLANET” and… “EVIL MORTY LAIR (BLOW UP LATER)”.

Morty blinked, tears abruptly coming to an end.

“HE HAD THE COORDINATES SAVED THIS WHOLE TIME?!” He yelled, his hands immediately clenched around the portal gun. God, did Rick add this when he rebuilt the thing?! Morty could swear this wasn’t here before.

He wanted to facepalm a million- no, a billion times. Morty had wasted time and sanity just by hopping from one dimension to another, when the place he wanted to go to was right in front of him the whole time, all he had to do was to press it.

With gritted teeth, Morty tapped on the tiny gun the RIGHT coordinates. He pressed it with a bit more force than necessary, and the portal was shot out. Without thinking twice, Morty walked into it.

When Morty got to the other side, his anger lifted the instant he stepped out of the portal. He had teleported in the middle of the living room of Evil Morty’s mansion… So that’s where Rick had saved the coordinates. Well, as much as Morty is mad at Rick for saving this location just so he could blow it up later, he’s glad that he saved it here. Morty was wondering how he’d be able to get inside.

He took a look around, but it was very dark. The only thing that let him see anything right now was the portal right behind him, which swirled and shined for a bit before closing. Great. Now Morty can’t really see anything.

The barrier outside was now presenting a night sky. The moonlight helped a bit, but not enough. It was still pretty dark… And quiet.

Morty hesitated for a bit, but opened his mouth. “Rosie? Y-you there?” He assumed Evil Morty had fixed him by now. He probably did, right? Or maybe he isn’t called that anymore. He thought, then cleared his throat.

“Robot… Butler? Hello?” Still nothing. “E-Evil Morty? Anyone?” Morty called again, but no one came. He assumed that Evil Morty is probably asleep right now, since everything is dark and it’s as silent as a funeral. Morty feels bad for doing this, breaking into his house in the middle of the night that is.

Should he make his way upstairs? Or sleep on the couch and wait until tomorrow to apologize? No. That sounds way too crazy, all of this is. Realization was slowly starting to dawn on Morty that maybe this wasn’t a good idea. Evil Morty literally said that he’d kill him on the spot, after all.

Okay, no. Stop thinking about that. Morty had already gone through a lot of shit to get here, so Evil Morty needs to at least listen to what he has to say. He felt a tiny bit more confident, and took his phone out to use the flashlight. The plan is that he’ll go upstairs and apologize. Should be easy enough.

Except it isn’t.

Suddenly, Morty felt something press against his back, right behind where his pancreas should be. It was round and smooth, like a gun nozzle.

Oh.

A voice spoke up behind him. “What the fuck are you doing here?” His own voice, talking to him. The sentence barely sounded like a question, more like a statement if anything. There wasn’t any intonation in it that made it sound like he was asking something, but he still wanted to know anyway.

Morty froze in place. He tried to keep his breath steady, but it was hard, considering that there was a death threat right behind him right now. He slowly tried to turn his head around. “I-”

“I didn’t say that you could move.” With that, Morty snapped his head back to what he was looking at in the first, which is the wall. “Now, tell me.” The gun was pressed harder against Morty’s back. “Why are you here?”

Morty’s hands trembled, sweat immediately started to form on his forehead. Regret washed over him in an instant, going over every fiber of his body. He tried to speak, but words wouldn’t come out. His eyes darted across the dark room, what he could see of it at least. 

After a bit of struggle, he managed to speak up. “I-I’m here for you.” Morty said quietly, and with the stir of emotions he felt right now, embarrassment was added into the mix for having to say that outloud.

Silence filled the room. Okay, great. Now Evil Morty wasn’t responding. Morty bit his lip in fear, with everything in his body telling him to get the fuck out of this situation, but he couldn’t just do that.

“Hands up, turn around.” As if things couldn’t get worse, Evil Morty turned into some type of cop. “Drop that portal gun.”

Morty did as he was ordered to do. He knelt down to put the portal gun on the floor and stood up again, his feet shuffled on the floor, and he finally turned to face Evil Morty. Who kicked the portal gun away from him.

Morty stared at him with wide eyes, trying to not think too much about his current situation, otherwise he’ll get into cardiac arrest.

Evil Morty seemed… Kind of awful, actually. The moonlight shimmered on top of his face, but it was still kind of covered by Morty’s own shadow.

Speaking of face, he looked pretty angry, but his expression was overall unreadable like usual. One thing Morty noticed is the messier hair and the fact that his eyebags somehow managed to get darker, Morty didn’t even know that was possible.

“You came back for me.” Evil Morty repeated, to make sure that he heard it correctly. “What happened?” He cocked his gun, almost mockingly. “Did Rick get bored of you again?”

Morty visibly tensed up, hands still up in the air. “N-no. He didn’t get ‘bored’ of me.”

“Oh, really?” Evil Morty asked. “Then why are you here for me? Did Rick set you up for this?”

Morty slowly shook his head. Evil Morty gave him a piercing look, trying to figure out Morty’s deal. “Then what do you want from me?”

Morty took a shaky breath. “I-I don’t want anything from you.” He said. “...I want to apologize.”

He saw Evil Morty’s face twitch for a second, before souring up again, even harder than before. He pressed the gun a little harder again, as a warning, or maybe as a way to ground himself.

Evil Morty wanted to guarantee that, if he actually shot Morty, his death would be slow and painful.

“Apologize?” Evil Morty snorted, as if it was one big joke, but his smile fell almost immediately. “Seriously? You have the audacity to show up here just to say ‘you were right’? What happened to ‘he’s changing’?”

Morty’s jaw tightened. “Look, this isn’t about Rick-”

“But it is.” Evil Morty cut him off. “Everything is about Rick. The sooner you realize that, the less painful it’ll be.”

Again with the shitty comments. “W-will you just listen?! Please… I came all the way here to say sorry. I don’t want to go back without saying it.”

Evil Morty didn’t respond, but with pursed lips, he nodded. Morty took a deep breath, gathering his thoughts together. “... I’m sorry, alright? I-I’m sorry for taking your invitation, then throwing it away. For leaving you behind…” He paused. “It was a huge dick move on my part, and I know I have no ways of justifying it, but… I’m sorry. I really am.”

Morty’s heart beat fast, and he felt tears prickle on the back of his eyes, but he held them in. He can’t look weak right now, otherwise it’ll look like he’s gaslighting Evil Morty. His apology comes from the heart, and all Morty expects is that he’ll at least get out of this alive. He can live with a “no” from him.

Silence sat between the two. Morty avoided eye contact as if it was the plague, too afraid to look at Evil Morty’s face, let alone his eye. 

“... Do you really mean that?” Evil Morty spoke up quietly, almost shy sounding.

Morty gulped. “Yes.”

“Okay,” Evil Morty began, shifting his weight from one foot to the other. “I don’t forgive you.”

Morty’s heart dropped in an instant, and everything around him felt like it stopped moving for a second. Okay, so he actually can’t live with this. “... What?” He blurted out, hating himself for how genuine his uneasiness sounded like.

“I don’t forgive you.” Evil Morty said again, way colder this time. His eyebrows furrowed even more due to Morty’s reaction. “I can’t believe you’re actually surprised by this.”

The other boy’s eyes widened, and his gaze slowly fell to the gun pressed against his torso. Something came up to Morty, something he couldn’t quite describe, but it was awful. His stomach twisted into knots, and he felt cold on the inside. His heart felt like it was being pulled, somehow, and an awful sense of dread washed over him.

Evil Morty lifted the gun up to stay under Morty’s chin, and pushed it upwards to force Morty to look at him. “Oh, Morty. What did you think was going to happen? That I’d forgive you and crawl into your arms like you did with Rick?” Evil Morty cooed, huffing out a laugh. “I stopped forgiving a long time ago.”

Morty didn’t reply. He was too busy thinking about how the world just ended, or the realization is still setting in, and he’s noticing that he cares about his relationship with Evil Morty more than he’d like to admit. 

“I have to admit it, though. I wasn’t lying when I said that you had balls.” Evil Morty’s lips curled into a small, almost sadistic smile. “You were brave enough to come back here and say that you’re sorry. Think of it as something positive, at least you’re going out with some morals… Unlike your grandpa.”

Morty’s pupils slowly shifted to Evil Morty’s eye. “S-so what?” He murmured. “You’re going to kill me?”

“I did say that, didn’t I?” Evil Morty grinned. “But I’m not going to kill you now.. I’m going to shoot you, kill your family and make you watch. Then, I’ll leave you there to bleed and you’ll die.”

Morty’s eyes widened. He just remembered that despite living with this version of  himself for 2 weeks, he’s still batshit crazy. Oh my God, what was Morty even thinking? He exploded The Citadel of Ricks, which caused a huge genocide. He obviously wouldn’t think twice about hurting Morty and his family.

Evil Morty took a step closer to him, pushing the gun towards his stomach with more force than he actually did during this whole conversation. Morty could feel Evil Morty’s breath tickling his skin due to how much their distance closed.

“It’s kind of sad that it has to end like this,”

Morty felt his whole body shiver.

“I really thought we were friends.”

He maintained eye contact with Evil Morty.

“Guess I was wrong. If you dropped me for Rick, it just means you’re just the same as any of them.”

Morty’s hand trembled.

“If I were like you, I’d say ‘I’m sorry for this’. But… I hope this hurts.”

Suddenly, Morty’s body reacted before he did. 

SMACK!

His hand- no. He slapped Evil Morty across the face. Morty’s eyes widened even more at the same second, realizing what he just did. He didn’t even think about it, he just did it. Morty isn’t sure if this is instinct, or some body enhancement Rick put on him…

But that felt great.

Evil Morty’s head snapped to the side, gun dropping from Morty’s stomach, the sound echoed in the empty living room. He stood there for about three seconds as Morty felt an intense power rush. Then, slowly, he lifted his head up, face written in disbelief.

Morty’s power rush died at the same time upon seeing Evil Morty’s face. If he was angry before, he is furious now. He lifted his gun again to aim at Morty, not playing around this time. Morty could see it in his eye that he was about to get shot.

In a swift (and panic-y) movement, he grabbed Evil Morty’s laser gun fast enough to aim it towards the ceiling. The shot went upwards, and both boys struggled for dominance, before Morty managed to pry the gun away from Evil Morty’s touch. Someone with an outsider’s perspective would just assume this situation is two equally ugly malnourished teenage boys rough-housing in order to look more masculine.

The gun fell to the floor, near Morty’s broken portal gun. They looked at each other for a second before racing for it. Before Evil Morty could get his hands on the gun again, Morty tackled him onto the ground. They rolled around for a bit and Morty began to punch him wherever he could reach. “I’M NOT LETTING YOU KILL MY FAMILY!”

“OW!” Evil Morty pulled Morty’s hair, and with a left clenched fist, he whacked Morty straight in the face, the hit landing on his nose. Morty let out a cry of pain from the punch, hands shooting up to his nose. Blood started to come out of it almost immediately. 

But he couldn’t focus on that right now.

Evil Morty stood up, and tried to reach the gun again, but Morty got a hold of his heel before he could, making him fall down to the floor again. He creeped on top of Evil Morty and took a hold of his arms to make sure he wouldn’t reach it, doing everything in his power to make sure he can’t be a deadly threat, and also beat the shit out of him.

“S-STOP RESISTING!” Morty sneered, keeping him in place.

“FUCK YOU!” Evil Morty shot back, struggling to move. He tried to drag them both closer to the gun, but Morty pulled his whole weight to the other side, making his back hit the wall as they did.

“YOU FIRST!”

With a grunt, Evil Morty elbowed Morty, making him let out another noise of protest. That’s his cue. “RB! COME HERE! 

RB? What the hell is that? A music genre?

“What seems to be the problem, sir?” Morty’s eyes widened as he heard the familiar voice. It was Rosie’s.

“GRAB HIM! THE ONE WITHOUT THE EYEPATCH!” Evil Morty ordered. Oh, so that’s how he’s going to play.

“HEY, WAIT!-” Morty yelped as he was torn away from Evil Morty by robotic arms, then being wrapped around him. He let out a sharp gasp, feeling his ribs being crushed. “Y-Y-YOU ASSHOLE! LET ME GO!!!” 

Evil Morty slowly stood up, panting. Despite the dark room, he could still make out Evil Morty's obvious pissed off look.

He stepped away from Morty, and slowly knelt down to grab his laser gun. Evil Morty spared a glance towards the direction of Rick's portal gun, and without a second thought, he stepped on it. 

“Funny, I thought Rick would take a little longer on making a new portal gun.” With some pressure, the gadget broke under Evil Morty's foot. “Too bad that all his hard work went into waste right now.”

“NO!” Morty screamed. Well, there goes his one-way-ticket of getting out of this place. He tried to wiggle out of Rosie’s grasp, but the robot wouldn’t budge. The more he tried, the more it pained his poor organs.

“You put on quite a fight,” Evil Morty pulled out his own portal gun from his left pocket, and shot out a portal. “But I’ll be going now. Don’t even try to leave, it’ll be more painful if you do.”

He began to walk towards the yellow portal. Shit. Fuck. He was really out of his way to kill Morty’s family. Morty knew he was insane, but he never expected him to actually pull this out-of-pocket cartoonishly evil villain bullshit!

Morty gasped as Rosie tightened his grip around him. He had to think of something, and he had to do it fast. His family’s life was at stake.

“Uh… Fuck!” What was Evil Morty calling Rosie again? “RB! I command you to let me go this instant! P-please!” Morty did his best Evil Morty impression, which wasn’t too difficult. Either way, there’s no way this’ll actually work.

“Okay!” The robot responded, and unwrapped its arms around Morty. 

Oh, wow. It actually worked. 

His feet landed on the ground, and he hunched over, placing his hands on his knees. Morty took a deep breath of air, finally being able to feel his lungs again.

But he stopped, because Evil Morty had just stepped into the portal.

Shit! Morty thought. In a flash, without any more time to waste, he ran towards it.

With a jump, he barely managed to get through the portal. When he got out, Morty barely paid attention to his surroundings, but the setting was familiar…

That’s when Morty realized that Evil Morty decided to teleport to the forest in his town, the one that has that campsite with a name that sounds like someone gave up in the middle of naming it. Right in the middle of the roadway. Did he choose this specific place for dramatic effect?

THAT DOESN’T MATTER RIGHT NOW! Morty thought, and began to run towards him.

Evil Morty swiftly turned around, eyebrows raised as he saw Morty going to pounce him. “What the-”

“AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!” Morty let out a battle cry and pushed Evil Morty to the ground. The other boy let out a shriek of pain as his back hit the ground, hand unclenching from the laser gun.

Morty took that as an opportunity to grab it, but Evil Morty slapped it away. The gun was thrown away from both of them, falling into a nearby bush. “HA! Nice work, idiot!” Morty quipped, right before being gripped by the shirt and pulled down into the pavement.

He yelped, and before he knew it, he was wrestling with Evil Morty again. Morty got a hold of Evil Morty’s eyepatch and forcefully pulled it off to guarantee that he doesn’t have any sci-fi bullshit tricks up his sleeve, which made him scream. With that, he punched Evil Morty on the eye with wires coming out of it.

They landed blows against each other, and eventually, Evil Morty stopped playing around. “ENOUGH!” Mecha-tentacles came out of his back, and they forcefully grabbed Morty to pin him down.

“ACK!” Morty cried, and before he knew it, Evil Morty was on top of him. The tentacles backtracked, but his evil self started to do something new.

Evil Morty wrapped his hands around Morty’s neck and squeezed as hard as he could, putting his whole body weight into it. Morty gasped, and his hands shot up to Evil Morty’s wrists to try and pry them away, but Evil Morty doubled down.

“R-REALLY? TH-THIS IS WHAT YOU’RE GONNA DO?!” Morty gagged, wiggling under him, but Evil Morty was determined in choking him.

“SHUT UP!” Evil Morty sneered, and readjusted his grip around Morty’s throat, pressing both of his thumbs into it. “THIS IS YOUR OWN FUCKING FAULT! NONE OF THIS WOULD BE HAPPENING IF YOU HADN’T COME BACK IN THE FIRST PLACE!”

“I WAS-” A gasp came out of Morty's lips. “TRYING TO REACH OUT!”

“I DIDN’T WANT YOU TO REACH OUT! I MADE THAT CLEAR! WHAT PART OF THAT DID YOU NOT UNDERSTAND?! I HATE YOU, MORTY. I HATE YOU!” Evil Morty screamed. “I hate that stupid piece of shit you call your ‘grandpa’. I hate your shitty personality. I hate your face. I hate your stupid fucking mannerisms. I hate the fact that I’m a version of you. I hate that you came back… 

And I hate,” Evil Morty leaned down so he could say it to his face, breath hitching. “Hate that you left me.” He said in a low, shaky tone.

Morty gasped, feeling helpless. His eyes watered, and his heart pounded fast. Evil Morty looked down at him, with his expression filled with wrath and resentment. He could feel drool coming out of his mouth, and he attempted to grip Evil Morty’s wrists again, but without even half the force he left before.

So this is how it ends, dying by suicide with extra steps. Funny. Morty always assumed he’d die in a hot chick’s arms when he’s super old, or something. But now he’s not only going away young, but dying by himself.

"DID YOU REALLY THINK THIS WAS GOING TO WORK OUT?! God, you're even STUPIDER than I imagined!"

This sucks.

Evil Morty is right. If Morty hadn’t been sensitive and wanted to apologize, he wouldn’t be in this mess.

“ANSWER ME!” Evil Morty’s voice hovered in his command, he shook Morty desperately.

But there’s no fucking way Morty is not going out with at least a little bit of dignity.

With his last gasp for air, he spoke up.

“Y-you’re no better… Than… R-Rick.” 

Morty’s face felt hot and his lungs burned, to make things worse, his body was getting weaker. His hands slowly started to detach themselves from Evil Morty’s wrists. With his vision growing blurry, his eyes felt heavy. So he just stopped fighting back like he usually does.

…

Something wet fell on his cheek.

Morty slowly opened his eyes again, slowly coming back to his senses.

Evil Morty was crying.

His grip slowly loosened around Morty’s neck, making the boy let a huge gasp leave his lips, but his hands still hovered over the same spot. Evil Morty’s vision grew blurry, and with his breath hitching, he slowly started to move his trembling hands away from the other boy’s neck.

Morty breathed heavily, looking at him as he had just grown a second head. He propped up from the ground with both elbows, with Evil Morty still on top of him. He had never seen him like this before. Evil Morty is usually confident and full of himself. But with no eyepatch on, that scared, teary-eyed look made him look just like any other Morty.

His heart squeezed. Which is funny, because Evil Morty was trying to kill him just a few seconds ago. This threw Morty off. He didn’t want to sympathize with him just because he started to cry now. It’s probably one of his tricks.

But still, Morty spoke up. “Ev-”

BEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEP!

He jumped from where he laid, and swiftly looked to his left. A car was approaching both of them. Oh shit, that’s right, they’re still in the middle of the street. Evil Morty turned around to look at it too, like a deer caught in headlights. 

Dead deers, they’re about to be, if they don’t get a fucking move on. “OH, FUCK! MOVE!!!” Morty suddenly gripped Evil Morty’s shirt and, with all of his last bit of strength, pulled them both out of the road. The car passed in a flash, and it ran over Evil Morty’s portal gun in the process.

Both boys rolled on the grass for a bit, before Morty’s back landed on a nearby tree. He groaned, and his hand shot up to his back, letting out a hiss. Evil Morty laid next to him, hyperventilating. Morty eventually let himself fall to the grassy floor again, even though his back hurt like crazy, and took deep, greedy breaths.

Oh my fucking God, they almost just died.

A few seconds passed, none of them with a bit of silence. Morty took in as much air as he could, and slowly turned his eyes to look at Evil Morty. “A… Are… You okay..?” He asked by instinct at this point between exhales.

Evil Morty didn’t answer. If anything, Morty asking that question made him start to cry again. In a swift movement, Evil Morty stood up and turned his heel to run away.

“Wh- HEY!” Morty sat up, but not with the same amount of speed or motivation as Evil Morty. How the fuck did he have the energy to run right now? “EVIL MORTY! OH, GOD DAMN IT!” He scowled, slowly getting on his feet. Morty’s whole body hurt, and now he had to deal with this, just great.

He took a heroic step to where Evil Morty ran to, but his attention got caught up in his eyepatch that was tossed on the side of the street. He quickly picked it up and placed it in his right pocket, not bothering to try and pick up what was left of his portal gun. “W-WAIT UP!” He exclaimed.

Morty didn’t really have energy to run anymore. He was exhausted.

His neck, nose, head, and pretty much everything else in his body hurt. Evil Morty really did a number on him, maybe as much as he did to him. 

Speaking of Evil Morty, he ran into the woods. Morty felt really conflicted by following him, especially after the guy threatened to kill him and his family, and even attempted to kill him in the process… But something inside Morty told him that he couldn’t just leave.

Maybe it’s the “Morty instinct.” Something about being built for forgiveness. He hardly knows about it, but he doesn’t care. Evil Morty was upset, and Morty felt like he was the only one who could fix this somehow.

“Evil Morty? Evil Moooooooooorty?” Morty called out with his phone in his hand, using the flashlight. He took a look at the screen, and noticed that it was holding on with 3% battery left. “Fuck, dude. Where are you?” 

Morty eventually stopped in his tracks. He turned off the phone’s flashlight and placed it in his right back pocket as he slumped against a tree. He gazed upwards into the night sky, a hint of moonlight washed over him, but it was overshadowed by the leaves.

“God damn it…” He mumbled, placing a hand on his forehead. It’s already nighttime, he’s far away from home with no portal gun, no accepted apology, a bruised nose and eventually an useless phone, too.

Well, the night had just gone to shit. Morty kind of hated himself for being so impulsive in the first place.

Maybe he should call someone, like his mom, to come pick him up. There’s a bit of battery left in his phone… But what the hell is he supposed to say to his family? What is he supposed to do about Evil Morty?

He sighed, feeling too tired to even think about this stuff. Morty slowly reached for his pocket again, until he heard something in the distance. Like leaves rustling.

Morty turned around and began to follow the sound. After a few seconds, he reached the part of the forest near the huge cliff. He pushed some bushes on the way there, and finally, reached the source of the noise.

Evil Morty was sitting on the ground, with the big view of the town right in front of him. But he wasn’t looking at it, he was hugging his legs, with his face hidden on his knees.

Morty let out an involuntary sigh. Thank God. He actually managed to find him. 

The relief passed by in an instant, now Morty felt… Conflicted. Awkward, mostly. Well, he’s here, not killing his family, that’s good. But the other part of him couldn’t just leave him there, obviously.

With a bit of hesitation, Morty began to take a few steps towards him. He walked up to stand right next to him, and coughed. “I-is this seat taken?” Morty joked, trying to lift up the mood.

Evil Morty didn’t answer. Morty chuckled awkwardly, and took silence as “yes”. He lowered himself, and sat down next to Evil Morty. He scratched the back of his head awkwardly, gaze flickering between his evil self, the sky and the town below them.

Okay, now what?

“... Why?"

“Huh?” Morty blurted out, shifting his full focus to Evil Morty. 

Evil Morty stayed quiet for a bit, but managed to find his voice. “... Why did you follow me?”

“Oh.” Morty said. The words died in his throat. That’s right, why did he follow him? Morty didn’t really think that much about it. Evil Morty almost choked him to death and ran into the woods, so for what reason Morty followed him for? “Um…”

“Don’t even bother answering that.” Evil Morty said, his tone deadpan like usual, but really flattened. Like someone had taken something important away from him. “You came here because you’re meant to do so.”

Morty raised an eyebrow, but Evil Morty continued. “I almost killed you. But you came back.” He stated, slowly lifting up his head from his forearms. He lazily turned his head to Morty. “You ran after me because you felt like you had to. Right?”

He asked, voice hoarse, and puffy eyes. Morty’s eyebrows immediately furrowed, then he switched his gaze to the floor. He gripped the grass under him. He knows what Evil Morty is talking about. 

“Y-yeah… I did.” Morty admitted with a nod. He’s not lying, something in him did scream at every fiber of his body to go after Evil Morty.

“I know.” Evil Morty replied. “Mortys are built for forgiveness. It’s just the truth. You’re meant to be beat up, and take it. Then forgive the person who hurt you afterwards. It’s how things are meant to be.”

Evil Morty sniffled, wiping a threat of a tear on his eye with a disapproving look, as if he despised it. “I tried to fight it.” He said. “I tried… Talking to him, standing my ground. But it was useless. I realized it was pointless the second I started to see the pattern. Rick would get mad at me, I’d get sad, then I’d come back for him, asking for his approval.” He paused. “Apologizing for making him upset.”

A dry chuckle left his mouth as he gazed at his own bruised hands. “And when I finally got away… When I finally got over Rick… I noticed that I turned into him.”

Morty’s eyes widened by that statement. His mouth opened slightly, unsure what to say. He couldn’t find the words to answer him.

“You noticed it, too.” Evil Morty whispered, looking at him with a pained smile. “You said so yourself, I’m no better than a Rick.”

“Ev-” Morty stopped himself. “Morty.” He corrected himself in a more gentle tone, afraid that if he went a little further than that, he’d break. “I didn’t mean that.”

“I don’t care if you meant it or not.” Evil Morty answered harshly, but overall resigned. “You’re right. I stopped being a product of my grandpa and turned into him. Everything I did, I did because I wanted to get as far away from him as possible… But he never left.

That’s why I hate him. Because he’s a parasite. Because he’s awful. But you love him, and you hate loving him, and when you least expect it, you’re him. You turn into an egotistical, sad, lonely loser, because he takes advantage of your love and uses it against you.” Evil Morty took a shaky breath, placing both hands on his head. "And now I'm nothing. I'm nothing again. I was the one that got away, but somehow, I'm still where I started."

Morty wanted to speak up against that, but he kept quiet. It’s the truth after all, isn’t it? They're mostly just punching bags for Ricks, and when they aren't, they're human shields. Sp many of them planned on being born this way to serve a single purpose, being Rick’s sidekick. “... I know what you mean.”

He shifted his gaze to meet Evil Morty’s. “We… We’re meant to do that kind of thing. B-being a plus-one for an old man.” He paused. “But it doesn’t have to be like this. W-we might be Mortys, but we’re also people. We’re more than Rick.”

Evil Morty stared at him, then began to laugh like crazy. Morty widened his eyes. “W-what’s so funny?!”

“You still don’t get it. That's the problem with Mortys.” His laughter eventually died down. “You actually think that you're a person that matters.”

“We are!”

“No, we’re not! That’s what they want you to think! We aren’t actual people. We’re playthings for a higher being. Morty, they ran a program at The Citadel that raised Rickless- not orphan, Rickless Mortys into being the perfect fit for the average Rick. Our lives don’t mean anything. We’re as valuable as a grain of sand." Evil Morty argued. 

Morty looked at him as if he had grown a second head. This speech was throwing him off. He looked down to his hands, they gripped the fabric of his dirty jeans. 

He knows it’s true. That Mortys mostly exist to serve as an expendable associate. They have their little gimmicks, but they aren’t actually real. They’re just here to be played as a pawn by the “smartest man in the universe”.

But somehow, that didn’t matter to Morty right now.

Which is insane, because just a few weeks ago, he was crying over his grandpa leaving him for two crows. But for some reason, he couldn’t bring himself to care. Yeah, he’s a Morty. So what? Even if he’s “programmed” to do stuff, it doesn’t mean he can’t break out of character. Despite what Evil Morty had said, Morty truly believes that he’s a person just as much as he is.

“Stop it.” Morty began. “Stop saying that. Stop saying that we don't matter.”

Evil Morty raised an eyebrow, then huffed out a weak laugh. It's funny, but also pretty sad that Morty thinks like this. Mortys’ optimism and denial is usually one of the worst parts about them. “But we don't-”

“We don't matter by what standards?” Morty asked, with a glint in his eyes that Evil Morty hadn't seen before. “Rick’s?! Y-y-you’re gonna let yourself be defined by a 70-year-old man that you SWEAR that you hate?! What the fuck?! I thought your whole deal was being a rebel! That you hate Ricks and keep fucking off!”

Evil Morty blinked. “It's not like that.”

“BUT IT IS!” Morty argued, placing his hands on Evil Morty's shoulders. “Why do you keep telling yourself that you aren't a real person?! You are! And even if you aren't, y-you have ambitions, goals, interests… A-a whole fucking Oasis that YOU made yourself! So stop saying that you don't actually matter because you're a Morty. You do matter! You matter to ME!”

Evil Morty felt sweat start to form on the back of his neck. “... What the fuck are you talking about?” He said in a pitch higher than what his voice usually sounds like. 

A beat passed, then. “I care about you because you’re my friend.”

Evil Morty’s heart did a weird flip. He unconsciously let out a shaky breath, his fingers gripped on the grass. “I’m… Not your friend.” Evil Morty replied a bit too quickly and a bit too insecure in his words.

“BUT YOU ARE MINE!” Morty persisted. “And I’ll keep doing so, because I do care about you. I don’t care about our stupid fucking definitions to Ricks, or what we’re ‘meant to do’. If I want to care about you, I will! If I want to apologize, it’s just part of me! I came back because I WANTED to, not because of Rick!”

He tighneted his grip on Evil Morty's shoulders with a pained look in his eyes. “So, please…  S-stop saying that bullshit… You are not Rick. You're more than just a Morty. You're a person.”

“Tell me that you're a person.”

Evil Morty felt a shiver go down his spine. He stared at him in disbelief, his heart pounded like crazy, and he hated it. He hated himself for feeling something. He hated himself for believing Morty. It doesn't mean anything, it doesn't matter, nothing does, not even him. It's just delusional blabber coming from a Morty that wants to feel important.

“Say it.” Morty pleaded, holding him so hard that it hurt.

But maybe Evil Morty wants to believe in that.

“I'm… A person.”

“Again.”

It's an endless cycle he can't run away from. Even after his Rick is dead, he still manages to find his way into his life.

He doesn't matter to anyone special.

“I'm a… Person.”

But he matters to Morty.

“Go on.”

And that's what matters most.

“I-I'm a real person.”

It was overwhelming.

Evil Morty sniffled, and wiped a leftover tear from his eye with a resigned look. “Why did you have to come back?” He asked, voice cracking slightly. “I was doing fine without you.” He lied.

Morty frowned, looking genuinely apologetic for making Evil Morty cry again. “I’m sorry.”

“Stop. Stop doing that. Stop apologizing.” Morty didn’t reply. Instead, he scooted even closer to him. “What are you doing?” Evil Morty asked, but surely enough, Morty had already wrapped his arms around him.

“I’m hugging you, because you need it.” Morty reassured him. “You matter, Morty. To me, you do. B-because I admire you. You’re… Really cool. A-and smart, a bit of a dick sometimes, but that’s fine because you’re funny. You were nice to me a few times, and I’m grateful for that. But most of all, I admire you because you're you."

Evil Morty stiffened. Hearing all of this was too much. It made him feel weak, vulnerable, helpess…

“And you're not him.” He added.

... And loved. So much loved.

Evil Morty's arms trembled on his sides. “I hate you.” He croaked out.

Morty drew circles on his back, slowly, to soothe him. “I know.”

“I-I fucking hate you.” He repeated. “Asshole…”

Despite saying that, Evil Morty started to tear up again. He couldn’t try to mask his emotions right now, Morty had backed him up into a corner. 

To make things worse for him, Morty pulled him closer, to whisper right into his ear. “I-I won’t let him hurt you again, I promise.”

With that, Evil Morty’s tears began to fall. He let out a choked sound, and started to tremble like crazy, but Morty was patient and kept hugging and shooshing him. It made him feel embarrassed for having to be comforted by Morty, of all people. Being treated like a child, no less.

But Evil Morty didn’t care at this point.

He wrapped his arms around Morty as well, and hid his face into the other boy’s shoulder. He was shaking like a leaf, and was getting Morty's shirt all dirty with tears and snot, but he couldn't help but keep crying.

Evil Morty was expecting to be pulled away, but Morty pulled him closer. Evil Morty wanted to shout, push him away, and even keep going with the plan that made him kill Morty on the spot.

But he couldn't.

So he sat there, crying like a little kid while being held by another version of himself. Not just any version, the main version. At first, Evil Morty thought it was stupid for this Morty to be the blueprint, the original concept…

He thinks that he gets why now.

A few minutes passed, and Evil Morty eventually stopped crying. Not really, some tears were still forming in his eyes, but he stopped sobbing and hiccuping, and even started to breathe normally again.

He pulled away, noticing the wet spot on Morty's shoulder, feeling embarrassed by the mess he had made. Not only to his shirt, but also to Morty himself. His nose had dried blood coming out of it, his clothes were all dirty and his hair was messy.

But Morty did some damage as well. Evil Morty's ribs hurt badly and he had a black eye on his wired eye.

He looked down to the ground, feeling awkward. Now that the emotional moment passed, he's slowly coming to terms with the fact that he had just cried in front of Morty.

Thankfully, Morty didn't look at him with anything other than a warm welcoming look in his eyes, which made Evil Morty's heart beat faster than he'd like to admit.

He took a deep, shaky breath. “I'm sorry for trying to kill you.” Evil Morty said it like it physically hurt him to say it out loud. “... And beating you up and threatening to kill your family.”

“I-It's okay.” Morty replied with a bashful smile on his lips. “I-I’m sorry too. Y'know… F-for leaving you, and saying that you're not better than a Rick. It was out of line, I-I didn't know how much it meant to you.”

Evil Morty looked down to his legs, he took a deep sigh. “It's fine.” He said. “Are you not going to apologize for beating me up as well?”

“No, you deserved it.”

Evil Morty snorted. “Fair enough.” He said, which earned a small chuckle from Morty. 

They sat quietly for a while, before Morty turned to him. “Hey, I kinda hate to tell you this, but… Your portal gun broke.”

“What?”

“The car ran over it.”

Evil Morty gave him a blank look, then placed his hand on the bridge of his nose, taking a deep breath. “Of course. Just my luck…” He said, rubbing his temples. “Did you grab it?”

“No. Y-you kind of ran away and I didn't have time to pick up what was left of it…” Morty said in an apologetic tone.

Well, at least some part of it survived. “Whatever, I can just look for it.” Evil Morty brought his hand up in instinct and poked his right, bruised eye. “OW!”

His hand immediately shot up to cover it. “MOTHERFUCK- ARGH!” He let out a pained noise. Meanwhile, Morty snorted and began to laugh.

Right, he didn't have his eyepatch on.

“Stop laughing!” Evil Morty said, embarrassed. “I forgot I didn't have my eyepatch on!”

Morty laughed and clutched his stomach as if it was the funniest thing ever. “I-I’m sorry! I wasn't expecting you to do that!” He managed to say between giggles, then slowly sat up again. He reached for his pocket, and pulled out a familiar accessory. “H-here. I grabbed it for you.”

Evil Morty snatched the item from Morty's hands and began to put it on to save face. Connecting the wires to the eyepatch was kind of painful, but he managed to do so anyway.

He tapped it gently, and thankfully it was still working. Evil Morty could see the shards of his portal gun from a distance, then huffed. Great, how is he going to get out of here?

“Did you find it?” Morty asked.

“Yes.” Evil Morty replied, pulling his hand away from his face. “It's destroyed, and I left all my spare ones at home.” A pause. “I can't leave.”

Morty furrowed his eyebrows, and fidgeted with his hands for a bit. “Y-you can come to my house to rebuild it there.”

Evil Morty raised an eyebrow, and huffed. “Right where your Rick is? Yeah, right. I'll be killed on the spot.”

Morty shook his head. “I won't let him hurt you!” He insisted. “I-I’ll talk to him, you can spend the night there and start to fix your portal gun tomorrow.”

Evil Morty stared at him with uncertainty. He wanted to argue and tell Morty that it wasn't that simple, but as much as he hated to admit, Rick C-137 was a special case… If Morty whined enough, maybe he'd actually listen.

God, Morty's optimism is infecting him. “Okay, fine.” Evil Morty said. “We'll pick up the rest of my portal gun, then we go to your house.”

“You have to promise me you won't try to kill him.”

Evil Morty groaned. “I won't.” He said through gritted teeth.

“Good.” With a pained grunt, Morty slowly stood up. He took a deep breath, taking in the fresh forest’s air, before turning to Evil Morty with a soft look on his face. He extended his hand to him. “Come on, my house is not too far away from here.”

“I know, I used to live in the same town.” Evil Morty wanted to reply, but he bit his lip to not say anything. Instead, he nodded, gaze fixed to Morty’s hand as he took it. He rose up from the floor with Morty’s help, and let his hand stay there. Morty squeezed it gently, as if he was afraid of hurting him, and Evil Morty squeezed back.

With that, Morty began to make his way back into the forest, with Evil Morty being guided by him. He knows his way through these parts, he knows how to return, still… Something about Morty holding his hand made him feel a little better.

So he let him, and with that, they began to start marching towards the Smith household.

Both boys passed by the roadway again, and Evil Morty took the portal gun shards. It was pretty torn up, but with the right tools, he could manage to fix it soon.

They were now approaching the familiar house, hands still linked together. The walk they did together had passed by in a flash, and Evil Morty didn't even realize they were already close to the front porch.

Evil Morty stopped in his tracks. “Wait.”

Morty turned around. “Yeah?”

He squeezed his hand, and slowly looked up to him. “Do I look like I've been crying?”

Morty raised an eyebrow, and took a good look at him. Evil Morty looked like absolute shit, but at least his black eye was covered, and his other one looked normal. It looked a little puffy, but overall fine. 

Even with that disheveled appearance, he still looked kind of cute in Morty's eyes.

“Uh…” Morty swallowed, hard. “No.”

“Good,” Evil Morty replied, then rubbed his eye. “You’re the first one to see me cry in a while, I'd rather keep it that way.”

“Okay?” Morty said, and with a few more steps, they reached the front porch. Morty let go of Evil Morty's hand. “We're here.” He breathed, feeling glad for finally coming back home in one piece. He began to walk towards it.

Evil Morty blankly gazed at the house, memories of his past flooded in his head. With a hint of hesitation, he took a step closer to the house.

Suddenly, a ton of firearms and weapons of mass destruction revealed themselves and aimed at him. Evil Morty blinked, and steadied himself. “I honestly don't know what I was expecting.”

“AH!” Morty yelped, and ran to cover Evil Morty. He spread out his arms and legs to make himself look bigger… The dumb strategy surprisingly worked, as the weapons hid themselves again.

Evil Morty’s eye widened, he was already preparing himself to dodge everything, but Morty had been faster than him. It made his heart beat a little quicker.

Suddenly, the garage door opened with a loud “SLAM!” And heavy footsteps approached the two. It was Rick. Of course it was.

“MORTY.” Rick called out, hovering over them. “I-I take one nap and suddenly you're gone! Where the fuck have you been?!” He took a better look at him. “Why do you look like you've been ran over?”

Morty felt the color drain from his face, but he chuckled awkwardly. “U-Um… Well…”

“Shut up.” Rick cut him off, and got close enough to him. He put his hand on top of Morty's face, and a halo-like device popped up on top of his head, and went all the way down to his feet before vanishing.

The dried blood that came out of Morty's nose was gone, and so was all of the pain he was feeling about two seconds ago. “Woah.” He said as he looked down at his hands, completely clean.

Rick gave him a weird look, and looked behind him. His eyes widened, and he took a step back to pull out his laser gun. “What the shit?! What is HE doing here?!”

Morty stood still in front of him. “W-wait! Don't shoot him! He’s not bad! He's not going to hurt us!”

“Are you kidding me? He's literally called ‘Evil Morty.’” He said, in air quotes.

“Ouch.” Evil Morty responded in a sarcastic tone. Rick took that as an opportunity to shoot him, so he pushed Morty away and did. As usual, it didn't make any impact, because a force field protected him.

Rick’s unibrow furrowed. “Morty, why is he here? Did he come to annihilate the planet, or something?!”

“Uh, no…” Morty said, awkwardly scratching his arm. “I-I brought him here.”

“WHAT?!”

“I-I-It’s a long story!”

“Morty, I don't CARE how long of a story this is! He kidnapped you!”

“He left by his own choice, actually.” Evil Morty corrected, and Rick tried to shoot him again. But, obviously, his force field wasn't down a second time.

“Look, I-I-I don't know what you're doing here, but you have to leave. Like, now.” Rick demanded. “I thought I made it clear that I didn't want you around me or my Morty.”

“Can't.” Evil Morty replied. “My portal gun broke.”

Rick raised his unibrow, confused. Well, whatever, if that's what it takes, he'll just use his portal gun and send him to a hellish dimension to get rid of him for once. “Whatever. If it means that you'll leave, I'll just use mine.” He placed his hand in the coat’s inner pocket, where he usually left it, but felt nothing.

That's strange. He placed it in the other inner pocket, then the leftover pockets. Absolutely nothing. “What the fuck?! Where the hell did I put my portal gun?!”

Rick was about to walk into the garage to see if he left it around somewhere, but Morty stopped him. “Rick! Wait!”

“What?”

“... I have something to admit.” Morty stammered, fidgeting with the hem of his shirt.

Suddenly, Rick connected the dots in his head. “YOU TOOK MY PORTAL GUN?!”

“I-I’m sorry!” Morty said, though he didn't really mean it. “I had to!”

“GOD DAMN IT, MORTY! THAT WAS THE ONLY PORTAL GUN I HAD! I WAS STILL STARTING TO WORK ON THE BACKUP ONES!!!”

Evil Morty folded his arms. “Well, that's too bad.”

“DO YOU WANT ME TO SHOOT YOU AGAIN?!” Rick snapped.

“I'd like to see you try.”

Rick aimed again, but Morty cut them both off. “STOP!” He yelled. “Rick, stop doing this! Evil Morty is cool now!”

Rick groaned and started to rub his temples. “Of course you went after him, of course you did. God, Morty. What the fuck is wrong with you?!”

“No. What the fuck is wrong with you?!” Morty pointed a finger at him “You left me first! But unlike you, I actually made a friend along the way!”

“Th-that’s RICH coming from you.” Rick scowled. “Morty, he's not your friend! He just wants to be my nemesis! He's doing this to annoy me!”

Evil Morty’s eyebrows furrowed. “Don't flatter yourself. I only agreed to come here because of Morty. I don't want to be here just as much as you do.”

Morty seemed taken aback by that statement, he turned around to look at Evil Morty, who shifted uncomfortably. “What? It's true.” He said, trying to sound nonchalant, but shyness covered his tongue. He was surprised by himself for actually admitting it out loud.

Rick gritted his teeth. “As IF I'm going to let you take another step into MY house! As far as I know, your whole gimmick is to monologue and fuck off! So do it! Fuck off!!!”

Evil Morty stared at him, resigned. “I need supplies to rebuild my portal gun.”

“I'M NOT LETTING YOU TOUCH MY TOOLS EITHER!!!”

“What is going on? I heard screaming…” A new voice called out. All three of them twisted their heads to see the source of the sound, it was Jerry.

He looked at them weirdly, and slowly closed the door behind him. “Oh, Rick! You found Morty!” He said as he walked closer to him, extending his arms out for a hug.

“Dad!” Morty hugged him back, and Jerry raised an eyebrow as soon as he noticed another Morty near them. The boy with the eyepatch gave him a blank look.

Jerry's face twisted with confusion. “Two… Mortys?”

“Yes, Jerry. Two Mortys. Try to keep up.” Rick said through gritted teeth.

Jerry pulled back from the hug. “Wait, Morty. Why are there two of you? Did Rick clone you too?” He asked, then chuckled. “Or am I drunk? Because I'm pretty sure I’m seeing double.” He said proudly, puffing out his chest as if it was the greatest pun ever. 

That joke seemed to be the trigger for Rick. “SHUT THE FUCK UP JERRY! YOU UNEMPLOYED BITCH! IS THIS WHAT YOU SPEND YOUR WHOLE DAY ON INSTEAD OF GETTING A JOB AND HELPING MY DAUGHTER?! S–SH-SHITTY JOKES?! GIVE UP! STOP IT! STOP TRYING TO BE FUNNY! YOU AREN'T FUNNY! YOU WILL NEVER. EVER. BE FUNNY.”

Silence settled between them, and Jerry stared at him, and pursed his lips. “... Okay, I can see when I'm not wanted. So I'll… See myself out.” He turned around and began to walk into the house.

Rick panted heavily on the spot, and both Mortys stood there awkwardly. That seemed to touch a nerve for Rick.

“You seem to be pretty on edge.” Evil Morty taunted.

“Why the hell are you still here?” Rick asked. “I thought I told you to leave-”

A creak of the door opening was heard again. “Dad, what's going on? Jerry came crying into the kitchen- oh my God.” It was Beth this time.

She looked at all three of them weirdly. “... And here I thought that Jerry was going crazy by talking about a ‘Pirate Morty'.”

Rick shuddered at the mention of “pirates”, and Beth began to walk towards them. “Morty, where have you been? I tried to call you!”

Morty sheepishly scratched the back of his head. “My phone died. I was… h-hanging out with my friend.” He gestured to Evil Morty. Beth gave him a half-disapproving look. “You friended yourself..! That's great, Morty.” Now that's just sad. 

She turned to Evil Morty. “You're from another dimension, I'm assuming?” Beth asked. This… Alternate Morty is probably from another dimension, but she had to make sure her father didn't go further with cloning shenanigans.

Evil Morty looked at Morty, and nudged him. “Follow my lead.” He whispered, and turned to Beth.

“Yes, Ms. Smith, I come from another dimension.” He said, sounding like a whole new person. “I'm ‘Eyepatch Morty', nice to meet you.” 

Beth’s eyes widened a bit, while Rick’s jaw dropped to the floor. She chuckled. “There's no need to be so formal, you can just call me Beth.” She said. “It's nice to meet you too, 'Eyepatch Morty’.”

“M-mom…” Morty began. “Uhm… My friend Eyepatch Morty got lost from his Rick. C-can he spend the night here so he can go back to his dimension tomorrow?”

“Oh, of course!”

“WHAT?!” Rick yelled. “S-sweetie… There's no space in the house.”

Beth looked at him weirdly. “Yes, there is.”

Rick gave her a look. “He can't stay here.” He said with a strained tone.

“Yes he can, dad.” She reprimanded, placing her hands on her hips. “This is the first time Morty brought a friend over for a sleepover, I'm sure there's a spare mattress up in the house somewhere.”

“There isn't any!”

“How would you know that?” Beth asked. “Besides, even if there isn't any, can't you just take one from an… Infinite mattress dimension?” She paused. “Better yet, use your portal gun to find Eyepatch Morty’s grandpa?”

“There's no such thing.” Rick replied, even though there probably is an infinite mattress planet somewhere in the multiverse. “Also, I can't use my portal gun. Someone lost it.”

“It was an accident! Jeez! I said I was sorry!” Morty said, putting his arms in the air.

“Well,” She began. “Maybe you can make new portal guns for both of you tomorrow.”

Rick wanted to rip his own hair out. “Sweetie. Portal guns don’t just grow from trees, i-it’s a huge creative process! I need the materials and stuff!”

“If it helps,” Evil Morty interrupted, pulling out what was left of his own portal gun. “I still have some leftovers of the portal gun I was using. Shouldn’t be too hard to fix it, right?” That little asshole knew exactly what he was doing.

Beth clapped her hands. “Wonderful! Dad, you can rebuild it tomorrow. Right?”

“Beth-”

“Right, dad?” She asked in a more stern tone.

Rick’s unibrow furrowed, and his fists clenched. But he sighed. “Yes. Right.”

“Great!” She tapped her father on the shoulder, then turned to her son (and her other son). “Why don’t you join us for dinner, Eyepatch Morty?”

Evil Morty smiled at her. “Aw jeez, that would be great. I’m pretty hungry.” He said, pretty much mocking Rick at his point. 

“Okay, I’ll be waiting for all three of you inside. We’re having lasagna!” Beth said, already walking away. As soon as the door closed and Beth was gone, Rick glared daggers at Evil Morty.

“W-wow, I can’t believe that worked!” Morty blurted out, Evil Morty just chuckled. “Yep, like a charm.” He said, reminiscing his days at The Citadel while he was president.

“You prick.” Rick snarled. “My daughter, man? That’s a low blow.”

Evil Morty shrugged. “What can I say? I guess I’m just too charismatic.” He looked all smug, and all Rick wanted to do was to kick his teeth in. He caught up on that. “I hate this too, y’know?” Evil Morty said. “But if we work together, I can be out by tomorrow. I’ll be out of your hair.”

Rick groaned. “Fine.” He managed to say. “B-but no funny business! If I see you trying to hurt my family I’ll kill you.”

“Wouldn’t dream of it.” Evil Morty replied.

Morty chuckled, watching it unfold. He mentally let out a sigh of relief. It’s been a rough day, and even rougher evening, but he’s glad that things are calmer now… Just a bit upset that Evil Morty will be gone again soon.

He shook his head, it’s better to not think about that right now. Morty switched his gaze to Evil Morty and thought of something. “Wait, Rick. Can you do the healing thingy you did with me but for Evil Morty?”

“What? Fuck no.” Rick replied in a heartbeat. “I-I’m not going to heal this asshole. I don’t know what happened to you two, but I’m glad that he got beat up. He deserved it.” A pause. “Besides, he probably also has it anyway. He can just use it on himself.”

Evil Morty crossed his arms. “Maybe I do, but I don’t want to use it.”

Rick's eyes twitched. “Okay, Morty. Now I’m definitely not going to use my healing tech on him, he's bluffing. He just wants me to waste it on him.”

“Rick…” Morty reprimanded.

“Ugh. FINE!” Rick begrudgingly put his hand in front of Evil Morty's face, and a floating ring passed over his body as well. God, he should've blown up this dick's mansion when he had the chance.

Evil Morty blinked, suddenly feeling more refreshed. He pressed his palm against his covered eye, and it didn't hurt anymore. He felt… Lighter, somehow. Even the tech parts of his body, that usually weighed him down.

He turned his head to Rick with a grin. “Thanks, gramps.” He brought his hand up and aimed it towards Rick, who squinted his eyes at him in response. “Now I get to do this.” His hand-beam began to power up.

“Hey.” Morty called out, placing a hand on his shoulder. “Y-you promised me you wouldn't kill him.”

Evil Morty’s smirk fell. He did promise that, didn't he? He tsk’d, and slowly put his hand back to the side. “Whatever.” He mumbled.

Meanwhile, Rick's unibrow raised up to his hairline. “Holy shit, you tamed him.” He blurted out, turning to Morty.

Evil Morty let out a noise of frustration, and his face heated up. “RICK!” Morty said, giving his grandpa a disapproving look.

“What? I'm just calling it as I see it!” Rick places his hands on his hip. “Wh-whatever. Let's just have dinner, I'm starving.”

The Smith family + “Eyepatch” Morty had their dinner. It was a bit odd at first, but eventually, the atmosphere came back to normal. Evil Morty didn’t really talk much, so his presence was barely noticeable besides Summer asking him if he had a nasty scar under his eye.

Beth had reprimanded her, and said that it was rude to ask. Evil Morty decided to take that to his advantage and say that his eyepatch was glued to his eye, which is half-true. Beth and Jerry took it as normal for multiverse stuff, Summer accepted his response, and Rick just rolled his eyes.

After they were done, Evil Morty took a shower and dressed up after Morty. He was wearing one of Morty's spare pajamas, which is a long sleeved yellow shirt paired with yellow pants. They're not half as good as the sleepwear he has at the oasis, but beggars can't be choosers.

He also said that he could take the couch. So here he was, tidying up the couch for the night. It’s not a huge, comfortable bed like the one back at his mansion, but it’ll have to do.

“So,” Summer began, leaning against the wall and crossing her arms. “Is each and every one of us gonna get an evil clone to hang out here at some point? Where’s mine?”

“Not a clone.” Evil Morty corrected her as he fluffed one of the pillows.

“Not evil either, Summer.” Beth said. “For your information, he’s not evil! He’s actually quite nice.”

Summer raised an eyebrow. “Wait, you still don’t know?”

“Know what?”

“Nevermind.” The younger woman replied and began to make her way upstairs, meanwhile Beth looked puzzle. “Wait, Summer! What are you talking about?” Her voice began to fade away as she followed Summer.

Oh, so Summer knows. Evil Morty thought. He honestly kind of assumed the only ones who knew about the fact that he’s “evil” are Rick and Morty, but he’s also not really surprised that Summer knows. Morty probably told her.

Once Evil Morty was done with adjusting the pillow he was holding, he placed it neatly on the left side of the couch. He sat down, causing the seat under him to creak. Wow, he didn’t remember the couch of his home being this shitty.

Although, to be fair, this isn’t his dimension. But so far, Evil Morty hasn’t really noticed something that seems out of place, there’s nothing that really stands out as different.

He began to look around in search of little details he might’ve missed. Why? Because he’s bored. There really isn’t anything to do. Evil Morty would be fixing his portal gun right now, but Rick is already there, and it was established that they’d work on it in the morning anyway. 

Evil Morty leaned against the couch. There isn’t anything that stands out, really. It’s like a game of “spot the difference”, but he doesn’t have the other picture in hand. It’s been a while since he’s last been home anyway, and he sure as hell doesn’t want to go back.

He gazed down at the floor, and stared at the carpet that was under the coffee table. It was yellow… But Evil Morty is pretty sure he the one at his house was red. Actually, he doesn’t really know. Maybe he’s getting a Mandela Effect. The yellow carpet seems pretty natural, but something about it just makes him vaguely remember a red carpet in the Smith household.

His eye widened as he realized something.

The carpet back at his house was yellow, just like in this dimension. The red carpet came from the crystal drug family dimension he was forced to go to with his Rick.

Evil Morty’s whole body shuddered as he remembered that again. He placed his fingers on the bridge of his nose, annoyed at himself for remembering that again. Great, now he’ll be thinking about it for the rest of the night.

In fact, he just ruined this for himself because he decided to choose to sleep in the living room. It’s honestly been so long since he’s been at one of these houses for more than 5 seconds that it’s bringing back bad memories now. That night happened ages ago, but Evil Morty remembers it as if it were yesterday.

His family’s organs splattered all across the living room, their blood camouflaging on top of the carpet… A bitter taste was left in his mouth, remembering this particular incident still made him uncomfortable.

Maybe sleeping in the living room wasn’t the best idea-

“Hey.”

A voice called out behind Evil Morty, and he jolted. He snapped out of his thoughts in an instant, and snapped his head around. It was Morty, who was looking at him weirdly now. Of course he is, Evil Morty just jumped.

“... Sup.” Evil Morty replied in a nonchalant tone and lazily leaned against the couch, but he knows damn well he can’t save now.

“Woah. Sorry, dude. I didn’t mean to scare you.”

“You didn’t scare me.”

“Yeah… Sure..”

Evil Morty’s eyebrows furrowed, but he resigned. He didn’t really feel like going along with this “got scared or not” conversation longer than he actually has to. “What?”

“Uh.” Morty began. “A-are you really gonna sleep on the couch?”

“Obviously. I prefer to sleep here than in Jerry’s mancave.”

“Hah, yeah, totally. I-I get that.” Morty kept his gaze away, scratching the back of his head awkwardly, he sounded kind of embarrassed. “But… I-I was wondering if you’d like to sleep in my room instead.” 

Evil Morty raised an eyebrow at that. Morty immediately caught up on what he was thinking, and his face flushed. “I’m not asking you to sleep with me!” He said. “Unlike you, I actually have a spare mattress in my house… Dad found one.”

“Thanks, but I’ll pass.” Evil Morty shook his head. “I already organized everything here. Besides, I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”

“You’re not overstaying your welcome.” Morty replied. “B-besides… It’s better than sleeping on the couch, right? Mom thinks we’re having a sleepover anyway.”

Evil Morty stood still for a few seconds, face unreadable. Morty was right, sleeping on a mattress in Morty’s bedroom does beat sleeping in the living room, especially because it brings up so many bad memories.

But on the other hand, maybe it’d be kind of awkward to sleep in the same space as Morty again.

Fuck it. Evil Morty thought. “... Okay, fine. I’ll take it, I guess.” He said as he started to gather the pillows and the blanket, he placed them neatly on top of the blanket and picked it up as if it were a huge bag. It’s better to do it like this than carrying three items with both arms upstairs.

Morty chuckled. “What are you, Santa?”

Evil Morty rolled his eyes. “Shut up.”

They made their way upstairs, and in a minute, they reached Morty’s room. Morty opened the door and welcomed him inside. “This is my room… I don’t know if it’s any different from the one you had.”

Evil Morty took a quick look around. “Not really. It looked like this. Like, identical to this, actually.” He placed the blanket bag on top of the mattress that laid on the ground, next to Morty’s own bed. When he stood up again, he finally noticed something on Morty’s wall. 

It was a poster of a ginger woman on the beach wearing a swimsuit in a pretty provocative pose. The thing that stood out the most in the picture were her boobs, especially because she was pushing her breasts against each other to make them look more appealing.

Evil Morty grimaced. Seems like he had finally found the thing that made his old home different from Morty’s.

“What?” Morty asked upon seeing his alternate self’s face twist in discomfort. Evil Morty waved his hand, brushing it off. “It’s nothing.”

Evil Morty knelt down, and slowly laid on the bed. Morty reached for the switch, and turned off the lights. He walked towards his own bed and laid down as well.

They stared at the ceiling for a couple of minutes, until Morty spoke up. “Hey…”

Evil Morty took his eyepatch off, and placed it under his pillow. “Yeah?”

He heard Morty take a deep breath.

“I’m glad you’re back.”

Evil Morty’s eyebrows shot up to his hairline, and he felt his heartbeat quicken up. He really hates when Morty does this, when he’s randomly genuine. It always throws Evil Morty off, like Morty had found his weak spot. 

But honestly, he can’t blame him for saying stuff like this. It’s just part of who he is.

Evil Morty sighed. “I’m glad you’re back, too.” He’s glad it’s dark right now, so Morty can’t see how red his face turned.

Morty shuffled on top of his bed. “Yeah... G-goodnight, Morty.” He replied, and Evil Morty could hear the smile coming from his voice.

“Night.” Evil Morty replied, already closing his eyes. Finally letting himself sleep after god-knows-how-many sleepless days and nights he spent.

With that, he finally managed to sleep properly.

Morty’s face twitched as he felt something warm hit his face. He slowly opened his eyes, and immediately closed them due to the light. He hissed, and tossed on the bed. After a few seconds, he slowly came to his senses again.

With a groan, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. He took a look around, and noticed that the empty mattress below him was empty.

Morty’s eyes widened. Did Evil Morty leave already? “Oh, shit!” Morty finally seemed to wake up. He didn’t even waste time with things like cleaning his face or taking a morning piss. Instead, he dashed out of his bedroom.

Meanwhile, Rick and Evil Morty were in the garage. Evil Morty had his arms crossed, and tapped his foot on the ground impatiently. “Are you done?”

“Almost…” Rick said as he used a screwdriver to adjust a loose screw from the portal gun. When he was done, he turned around to Evil Morty. “There.” Rick tossed the portal gun towards Evil Morty, who grabbed it before it could fall off the workshop table. “T-there’s your portal gun. Now do me a favor and fuck off.”

Evil Morty took a good look at the portal gun. It seemed fine enough, maybe a few cracks here and there, but it seemed to be working. It doesn’t really matter anyway, he’ll switch to a spare one when he gets home… But there’s still one thing bothering him. “Ugh, green portal fluid? This is such a Rick thing. I thought it was clear that I wanted yellow.”

“If you want the yellow portal fluid that badly, I can just piss on the container.” Rick scowled.

“No, thanks.” The younger boy replied, and typed in the coordinates to his house. A portal was shot out, and Evil Morty began to walk towards it before stopping in his tracks.

Rick huffed. “What is it now?!”

With no response, Evil Morty stepped away from the portal and made his way towards Rick’s workshop table. He grabbed a jar that was on top of it, carrying a little specimen inside, then he threw it inside the portal. A second later, there was a sound of glass shattering along with blood spilling out of the portal.

Evil Morty turned around to Rick, giving him a glare. Rick furrowed his unibrow and crossed his arms. “Don’t look at me like that.”

“Your attempts at killing me are just sad at this point, I’m not falling for the oldest trick in the book.” Evil Morty said, and threw the portal gun into the shitty portal. Finally, it closed. “Where’s my real portal gun?” He asked, extending his hand out.

The older man huffed and stopped leaning against his chair. “Whatever...” He leaned down and reached for one of the boxes under his desks, he pulled out another portal gun, which was identical to the one Evil Morty was holding just a few seconds ago. “Here. Can you leave now?” Rick placed it on top of the table.

Evil Morty crossed his arms. “So you can try ‘portal-mincing’ me again?”

“Th-this one is the real deal, dipshit!” Rick stood up with the gadget in his hand, and proceeded to shoot out a green swirly portal. “I’ll even prove it to you, look.” He stepped inside, and after a second, he stepped back in one piece.

His evil grandson still seemed pretty skeptical, so Rick handed him the portal gun. “You can even take a look at it yourself.” Evil Morty took that as a challenge and walked towards the portal, he peeked his head inside.

When his head made it through the portal, he noticed that it was a pretty familiar setting. Shirtless women everywhere, a bunch of balls, hooters at every corner…

This was Boob World.

Evil Morty put his head out of the portal with a nasty frown plastered across his face, fists clenched. The portal closed right after, and Rick had a smug smile on his lips. “What? I thought you liked that place.”

“Haha, very funny.” Evil Morty replied in a sarcastic tone. “Did Morty set you up for this?”

“Morty didn’t tell me anything. I-I just thought you’d hate the location I picked, and I was right.” He snickered. “It was kind of obvious, y’know.”

“What? What’s obvious?”

Rick pursed his lips. Explaining the joke and science behind his decision would be kind of awkward, but this is Evil Morty he’s talking about, so he doesn’t care about measuring his words around him. “... The fact that you’re the kind of guy who doesn’t really appreciates tits.”

“Wow. That was so mature of you.”

“Fuck you.”

Suddenly, their conversation came to an end with the sound of the door opening. “IS EVIL MORTY STILL HERE?!” Morty yelled.

The garage got quiet, and Morty’s face heated up when he realized that Evil Morty was still there. He almost let out a sigh by seeing that he’s still here, but frowned a bit when he saw the portal gun in his hand. “W-wait. You’re leaving already?” He asked with a frown.

Evil Morty shuffled awkwardly on the ground. “Not yet, I was…” He paused, thinking of something to make his excuse sound believable. “Just about to thank everyone for letting me stay here.”

“He’s lying. He was just about to fuck off.” Rick interjected, folding his arms.

Morty’s frown seemed to deepen, and Evil Morty glared at the old man. “I was testing portals because you just tried to kill me again- You know what? Whatever. I don’t have to stay here anymore. I’ll use this once, then never again.” He said, walking away from the garage and giving Rick the middle finger. “Because unlike, someone I actually have spares stored at home!”

“Rick!” Morty called out, Rick just shrugged. “What? I-I don’t give a shit about him. The only reason I helped is because I wanted him to leave.”

Morty groaned, and began to run towards Evil Morty’s direction. “Hey, hey! Wait up!”

Evil Morty turned around with a frown on his face, already in a bad mood because of Rick. But seeing Morty run towards him made his eyebrows unfurrow just a tiny bit. As soon as he reached close enough, he hunched over and let out a breath as if he had just ran a marathon. Evil Morty wanted to roll his eyes over how dramatic Morty was. “What?”

Morty stood up properly, and stared at him for a bit, before pulling him into a hug. Evil Morty’s eye widened, and he stiffened almost immediately. Rick watched this happen from the garage and groaned. “Fuck this, I’m going to the kitchen.”

Evil Morty almost dropped his portal gun for a second, but managed to keep his grip steady on it. Morty was still hugging him, and for a second, Evil Morty slowly put his arms up to hug back, but Morty finally pulled away. “Sorry, w-was that too sudden?”

“No. It’s... Alright.” Evil Morty almost breathed out, his grip tightening around the portal gun.

Morty gave him a sheepish, almost apologetic smile. “Take care of yourself, okay? I don’t want you getting hurt.”

“I won’t.” Evil Morty reassured. “But I appreciate your concern.”

“Yeah.” Morty messed with his long sleeve. “So, uh… A-are we cool now?” He asked, seeking for an affirmation.

They sat in silence for a while. Evil Morty stared at him with a blank look, but eventually cracked a smile. “Sure.” He replied without much hesitation, it made Morty feel a bit warmer on the inside.

“Cool.” 

“Cool.” Evil Morty repeated.

“I’ll… See you around.”

“I’ll call you.” 

Morty felt his heart beat a bit faster with that. He’s not sure how Evil Morty would reach out for him like that, considering that they didn’t have each other’s contacts, but he really didn’t care at this point. Morty stopped asking himself this sort of question about Evil Morty a while ago.

He slowly brought his hand up and waved. “Bye, Morty.”

Evil Morty shot out a portal, and waved back. “Bye, Morty.” He responded. With that, he stepped into the portal, and it vanished.

Morty was left in front of the garage by himself, waving to the air, before finally putting his arm down. His smile turned into a small, resigned frown. He heard a few steps approaching him, along with the sound of chewing. “W-w-what did I miss?” Rick asked with a mouthful of chips, noticing his grandson’s sad demeanor. “Did you guys break up again?”

Rick wasn’t the best at cheering up people, but he was pretty good at making them stop being upset by being angry. “Ugh. Shut up, Rick.” Morty scowled, and began to walk away from him. He opened the front door and closed it with a loud “SLAM!”, leaving Rick there eating chips.

“The fuck is his problem?” The old man said to no one in particular, and kept eating.

Morty eventually found his way towards his bedroom again. He plopped down on his bed and groaned into the pillow. 

Well, that wasn’t a true disaster, but it wasn’t that good either. 

He slowly turned around and faced the ceiling. Morty was wondering if he could just get started with his morning, get over what just happened instead of questioning if he and Evil Morty are actual friends again or not. Maybe he will get out of bed pretty for going to the bathroom and eating breakfast, but only when he’s done moping for a bit.

Until, out of the sudden, a yellow portal popped up on top of him. Morty sat up, raising an eyebrow.

Before he could even begin to register what was going on, something huge landed right on top of him. “OW!” Morty said, even though it didn’t hurt that much. His hand immediately shot up to the back of his head and he began to rub it. “The fuck?”

Wait, is that…? 

Morty turned the thing around and his eyes shot up to his hairline when he realized what it was. “SNUFFLES 2.0!” Morty beamed as he pulled the big plushie into a hug. When he pulled away, he saw a few sticky notes attached to its chest. 

With a “swhoop!” The portal above him was gone, and Morty picked up the yellow pieces of paper. The letters were pretty cramped inside the first note, and were written in cursive, but despite that, Morty squinted his eyes and didn’t waste any more time on reading.

Dear Hello, Morty.

I’m not going to waste my space here with any more bullshit, because I barely have any. I’ll be as direct as possible for that tiny brain of yours. Remember, you can always read it again if you didn’t get it the first or second time. Anyway, I was going through my things and, when I opened up my storage, I found this. I’m honestly surprised that I forgot I had it, since it’s almost as big as you are.

The first note ended there, Morty furrowed his eyebrows. God, what a dick. For a guy that says he’ll be “as direct as possible” he does take up a lot of writing space by insulting Morty. He started to read the second note.

But here it is. That third-eyed freak I got for you at “Blips and Chitz”. I’m asking expecting you to take it back, since I don’t want it. But I’m sure you do, because you were almost licking it up and down when I handed it to you. 

Morty blinked. Seriously, what’s this guy’s deal? Lack of space? Yeah, right. He has a whole mansion. Morty picked up the third note.

That’s all I had to say about this stuffed animal. I hope you take good care of it. Make sure to clean it every once in a while, it gets dirty fast. I would know, because I washed it. You’re welcome, by the way.

Until next time, Morty.

-”Evil” Morty

P.S.: Here’s my contact. Use it wisely. XXXX-XXXX

A huff of laughter escaped Morty’s lips. He gently placed all the notes on top of his little nightstand, making a mental note to save Evil Morty’s number. He clutched the big stuffed animal in his arms, and proceeded to take a long sniff. It smelt really nice, like a bunch of flowers mushed up together, but it wasn’t overwhelming.

His face flushed, and he buried his face on Snuffles 2.0, feeling an awful weight finally lift off his back by letting out a huge sigh of relief.

Yeah, they’ll be alright.