Chapter Text
Jack washes his hands six times before he’s convinced he’s gotten all the blood out from beneath his fingernails.
Everything in his head feels like static, an indecipherable mess that he doesn’t want to decrypt. When he opens his eyes, he’s greeted with the blurry sight of his scarred hands gripping the basin of the sink. The ceramic is cold beneath his grasp.
He should be glad, perhaps even grateful, to have this blood on his hands. Not for the reasons that Talon wants, not at all. Talon wanted that man dead for… well, who knows what Talon really wants? But Jack had his own motives. They were how he found himself punching the former UN auditors face until he felt bones crack, Reaper and the rest of the team watching over him in silence. It hadn’t been until Gabriel approached, stopping him with a firm ‘enough’. Only then had Jack risen back to his feet, using gloves that he didn’t remember pulling off to wipe blood from his visor. He hadn’t looked at Widowmaker and Sombra’s faces as he walked past them, suddenly desperate to get out of the building and away from their cold yet curious eyes.
With all the years that had passed, he couldn’t help but continue to blame any member of the UN for the fall of Overwatch, even if in his heart he knows if it was anyone’s fault, it was his. Perhaps that was why he had done it. The man had been a goner anyway, with Talon after him, so he might as well take his anger out on him, right? The thought didn’t stop his hands from shaking as he turned off the tap before reaching for a towel.
Wearily, he turns off the light as he leaves the bathroom, leaving his visor on the cabinet next to the sink. Jack walks over to his bed, picking his bloodied gloves up from where he’d dumped them earlier and tossing them into the bin. He’d get a new pair soon. There was no point holding onto more reminders of his mistakes.
At some point, he must have fallen asleep. He’s awoken to the sound of his door opening, someone stepping inside, closing the door behind them.
The bed creaks as someone sits down beside him.
Groaning, Jack rubs at his eyes as he rolls onto his back, squinting up at his visitor.
“Can’t even undress yourself now?” Gabriel. Of course it was Gabriel. And of course Jack had managed to fall asleep fully dressed. “Sit up.”
Jack does as he’s told, regarding the man sat beside him with caution, not quite sure what to expect from him. He was never sure what to expect from him anymore.
Jack watches the other man quietly as he leans over and undoes the zip of his leather jacket, sliding it off Jack’s shoulders. Gabriel looked… softer than usual, calmer than he felt he’d seen him in a while. He was wearing jogging bottoms and a black hoodie, and Jack finds himself reaching out and brushing his fingers against the soft fabric. He moves his hand away as Gabriel lifts off his t-shirt for him.
“Gabriel…” He starts, but he gets hushed immediately. Gabriel had never exactly been a chatty person, and was even less so nowadays, but Jack was used to it. He didn’t mind it, even. He sighs, and settles back down on the bed.
Gabriel lies down next to him, and it immediately feels like they were back in SEP; except a lot had changed since then, and he sighs as he looks at Gabriel’s scarred face. Eventually, Jack closes his eyes and falls back asleep to the feeling of Gabriel’s warm breath on his face.
There was still blood on his hands.
Jack wakes with a start, limbs getting tangled in the blanket covering him as he sits up abruptly. The panic rising in his brain only worsens when he realises he can’t see, anything at all, the room was pitch black and-
A hand grabs his, and he flinches away from the grip, wildly looking to his side. In the dark, he could faintly make out Gabriel’s face, and as his eyes adjust he can see moonlight peeking out from beneath the closed curtain.
The panic quickly fades to a numb fog, and he takes a breath – more of a gasp, really – of air as he tries to slow his heartrate.
“Fuck,” He breathes, closing his eyes. Gabriel’s hand finds his again, and this time he doesn’t flinch away. It was okay, he was in bed with the only person that mattered right now and they were safe. As safe as they were getting, anyway.
Slowly, Jack settles back down against the mattress, rolling over onto his side so when he opened his eyes again, he could just focus on Gabriel. Dark eyes meet his, and he hesitantly reaches to rest a hand on his cheek.
“How long have I been asleep for?” He asks quietly when he finally manages to find his voice. He hadn’t expected the other man to still be here when he had woken up. For a moment, he wonders if Gabriel had even slept.
“Only a few hours.” The reply he receives is equally as quiet; gentle, almost. “Nightmares?”
“Nightmares,” Jack whispers back, swallowing heavily. An old routine of theirs. It wasn’t rare that back when they were in Overwatch – no, even before then, when they were in SEP – that one of them would awaken in the middle of the night in a cold sweat, gasping for air. Despite things being different, very different now, he feels closer to Gabriel than ever.
All he could hope was that he felt the same way.
It was Gabriel that leaned in first this time, softly pressing their lips together, and Jack finds himself relaxing against the touch. Arms wrap around him and pull his body in close, and after a few minutes Jack leans away to pull the blanket back up over him. Gabriel’s skin was cold to the touch, though he hardly wanted to point that out. He wanted to enjoy every private moment he could get with him. Jack nuzzles his face into his neck, feeling his body relax in the familiar position.
When he next opens his eyes, there’s light filtering in from behind the curtain.
He’s still being held tightly against the taller man’s body, and he finds himself smiling at the sounds of gentle snores rising from him.
How long had it been since they had last shared a bed?
Jack ponders on the question as he wriggles back slightly in Gabriel’s arms, just enough so that he could look at his face, brushing his thumb against his cheek. It had been too long, he eventually decides.
The peace is ruined with the abrupt sound of the bedroom door being ungracefully opened, which promptly wakes Gabriel up in a probably foul mood – he’d never been one that liked his sleep interrupted.
Jack squints up at the intruder, and with his poor eyesight it takes him a moment to recognise the smirking figure of Sombra standing over them with her arms crossed.
“Thought I’d find you in here, jefe.” The girl announces, and Jack immediately knows that this… situation is, no doubt, going to be brought up again.
Settling with just scowling at her before looking away, he watches as Gabriel sits up, eyes lit with a dark fire. He was clearly unhappy, to say the least, with the situation, but from the looks of things, Sombra didn’t seem bothered.
“Get out of here, Sombra,” He growls, to which she shrugs at before exiting the room. Jack watches Gabriel stand, stretch, and then start getting dressed.
“Get ready,” Gabriel says, voice cold compared to how gentle he’d been last night. Things were too on and off between them. But Jack doesn’t object, or point it out, just simply nods and sits up. This was just how things were now.
Gabriel leaves without a word, leaving Jack to his thoughts as he gets dressed himself. He steps into the bathroom, the sink a blur of white and red. Soldier on, he tells himself.
Jack picks up his visor, and leaves his room in silence.