Chapter Text
Even so, the wind blows
towards the future
Feel the breath of life
on your cheek
If there was one thing Tina had learned in her life it was simply this: Lying to Queenie never ended well.
Her sister hadn’t said anything in those steely moments atop the stoop, not even a look of shock passed her demure features. The younger woman had merely smiled and wobbled forward to lock Tina’s elbow under her arm stating that since she couldn’t make it the night before Jacob had prepared a grand lunch for them. As quickly as they had come any desire to protest evaporated under her sister’s gaze and she agreed to follow her back to the bakery. Queenie chirped happily about the news her sister had missed in the past few days: Jacob got a fancy catering job, a lady asked her to fashion her a new dress, and the baby had started kicking!
All the while Tina desperately tried to shield the thoughts from the forefront of her mind. She never blocked Queenie out--she would never even try, despite her grumblings-- but she’d learned long ago how to organize her thoughts. She could shift them and make them less chaotic so when the pair shared an apartment Queenie had some relief in her own home. It wasn’t a constant practice and only used when she was trying desperately to hide her sisters’ birthday gift or when the day’s mission at work was particular bad. Or when, in even more likely occasions, when Queenie’s head was filled with too much and she needed relief.
She remained careful all through lunch to keep her mind filled with her joy for Queenie and Jacob, worries for work, and her constant search for Newt-- all things she knew her sister had gotten accustomed to in the last several months. Tina understood in her heart the likelihood of it at all working was close to zero, but she allowed herself to relax as Jacob brought out dessert. Her smile worked itself into something more natural while she prodded at the piece of pie before her.
“Oh!” Queenie started abruptly, “we were discussing baby names the other day, weren’t we, honey?”
Queenie glanced over at Jacob with a wide grin, but continued in her ever easy manner, “If it’s a boy we were thinkin’ of naming him after Tati--You and Newt weren’t thinkin’ of using it any were you?”
Tina choked, “Sorry?”
Her sister’s constant ease at conversation would never cease to amaze. Especially not when the next words out of her mouth were said as easily as her earlier lamentation about bladders and pregnancy. “Newt’s back, innit he? You might be trying real hard, but you’re thinking about him even more than usual!” Queenie spoke as sweetly as ever, but instead of a wicked grin or a delighted giggle her expression was more serious than usual--At least it was one Tina knew too well. Queenie was the picture of innocence, softly smiling, but with eyes that shone as scornfully as their mother’s.
“Jacob, honey,” She added, shifting as smoothly as ever, “I think Newt’s gonna be knocking on the door in just a moment, would you get it? I wanna speak to Teenie a moment about what it’s gonna be like when she’s pregnant.”
As if on cue there was a knock on the door.
Newt! Tina exclaimed through their mental connection with obvious irritations.
I never agreed with you not speaking to your sister, Newt’s voice hummed in return, low in warning, you need this. You need her. My companionship cannot make up for your sister.
Jacob, perplexed, hurried off to answer the door. Neither of the sisters said anything, but Tina tossed a scathing look over her shoulder towards the two men. Newt didn’t so much as glance at her as he asked Jacob to show him to the nursery, though the smile he wore was sheepish. Traitor.
“We’ll catch up in a minute you two,” Queenie called after the men wobbling to her feet. She picked up her wand from the counter and with a flick the cocoa came down from the cupboard and started warming itself up. Cocoa for cold night and long talks, that’s what their mother had always said. Tina settled into a scowl as her own cup set itself down before her.
“Teen,” the younger woman prodded allowing no more room for silence.
Tina bit down hard on her lip as her hands encircled the warm porcelain. The truth laid itself heavily in her heart. She’d never wanted to lock Queenie out, but to let her live safely, to have this family, it simply wasn’t possible with where and what she was going to have to do. Her sister would want to come with her and it wasn’t something Tina could allow in the most selfish of ways. Tina’s wish was always for Queenie to be happy and safe.
Arms engulfed her in a warm embrace.
She choked as the wave threatened to overwhelm her. The woman had expected to be scolded, for her sister to fight her, but not for the sudden desire to break within her hold. “Teenie,” Queenie whispered her voice quivering as she held her sister desperately closer. Tina felt the soft patter of moisture against her neck as she unraveled.
When their parents had died it had been Queenie who had cried. In the face of such pain a young Tina had decided to protect her sister, but in turn it was Queenie who had cried her share. As she had gotten older Tina had gotten better at showing how she truly felt, but it was often Queenie who had to push her. Barely a day ago she’d made the decision to shut them down again and do what needed to be done-- To protect Queenie . Even as the future she had hoped for crumbled beneath her feet she’d forced herself to bare it. Now Queenie was once more baring her pain and it was suffocating.
Tina’s hands moved, clenching the back of her sister’s shirt, while her shoulders shook with barely hidden emotion. It’s not long before her own tears overflow and she’d find herself grateful later for the simple fact that Newt had kept Jacob distracted for the entire duration of her moment of weakness.
Minutes passed before the two woman calm enough to separate, tear-stained and puffy. Tina dare not look up at her sister though she knew well that everything in her heart had been laid bare to her-- It was, after all, an impossible task to hide anything from her. She had been foolish to even try.
“Look, Queenie,” She started hoarsely, cursing herself for the way her voice was breaking, “it’s not-- I wanted to te--”
“Would you ‘ave?” Queenie cut in accusingly although her voice remained as gentle as ever.
Tina froze. Her sister made a sound in the back of her throat as she picked up her cocoa. “Teenie, you’ve never been any good at this sort of thing,” She remarked not unkindly, “ you think you gotta go protecting me. Before Jacob and Newt came along you wouldn’t buy along you wouldn’t buy a single thing for yourself if it wasn’t necessary but you sure would encourage me to get what I wanted.”
“The boys were a good thing for us, Teen. You started doing things a bit more for you and not me-- And me?” Queenie paused, enough to make Tina look up with concern but her sister’s smile is soft as she looked around the room, “it’s not much but I chose to be here. I’m not leaving neither-- even if MACUSA comes calling. You can’t protect me from that though I know you’ll want to…”
Tina’s frown turned deeper as her sister spoke far too many truths for her liking. She’d risk her position if it meant ensuring that Queenie, Jacob, and the baby were all right. Abernathy would be hiding under his desk when she was through with him. “You see?” Queenie remarked with a laugh before settling down. “But you can’t protect me and I don’t want you to. I was really happy seeing you get all dolled up for seeing Newt or forgetting about everything else while waiting on a letter. It was nice seeing you decide to finally do for you and not for me.”
“What’s any of this got to do with,” Tina faltered coloring before she hastily tacked on, “--anything?”
“Don’t you know?” Queenie responded as readily as ever, “Teen, more than anythin’ I want to see you happy, too. I mightn’t be some Auror, but you’re my sister. Why would you think I wouldn’t wanna know? --Oh, no! Don’t you go thinkin’ of the baby, you’re my sister Teenie! We--”
Queenie’s voice broke and tears prickled from the corners of her eyes, “Until the boys we were all we had. If you think I want you going off for some noble reason to die --”
“It’s not like that!” Tina managed abruptly.
“It is,” Queenie replied softening under the expression Tina wore, the smile on her lips watery, “but I know you’re tryin’ real hard to convince yourself it’s not. You already decided there was no way you’d make it out, didn’t ya? That you can’t think of what you’d do if Newt d--”
“Don’t.”
“Disappears for good,” Queenie finished leveling Tina with a look.
Tina twisted her hands in her lap without responding. Queenie sighed. Both women looked up when Jacob called from the other woman-- It seemed their minute had taken much too long. Queenie wiped at her eyes with one hand before she once more wobbled to her feet.
“Ever since we were real little, Teen, you were the pa and I was the ma,” She said lowering her voice as she offered her sister a hand, “and I was really hopin’ to see you as Ma one day.” Her eyes crinkled with unshed tears as her sister took an offered hand. Tina continued to refuse to look at her directly as the pair made their way to the pastel colored room.
Queenie, though still tear-stricken, was quick to put on a beaming smile as she pushed open the door.
“And here it is!” She exclaimed, tugging Tina in and leaning into whisper in her ear a moment later, “but you know what? I want to see you as an Aunt, too!” Queenie pulled away as she forced her sister further into show her around the room. She waved off Jacob’s worried remarks about her obvious state and threw her arms around Newt in greeting. Tina for her part remained red and unable to look at any of the inhabitants of the room.
Jacob insisted on giving Newt some baked goods for the go when the time care to which the man could only sheepishly thank him for. Tina remained on the edge of the group feeling as if she was being held up by the way her arms crossed protectively across her chest. Queenie was back to being the one who who lit up the room, the earlier conversation seemingly forgotten though Tina knew all too well it wasn’t.
“Look,” Jacob broke in as the headed for the door, causing the retreating pair to do a doubletake, “I don’t really know much about anything going on, really. Only what Newt’s said-- but the two of you best keep safe-- Then Queenie and I will prepare you a proper wedding--”
It was Queenie’s turn to choke. Jacob may knew they were leaving, but Newt had in no way told him the finer details of the situation. Tina moved to step towards her sister, worryingly and warningly alike, but Jacob was quick to scoop up his wife in his arms. “You’re a peach,” Queenie breathed with a shake of her head to his inquisitions before setting a stern look on the pair, “but you’re certainly right! I’ve had Teen’s dress planned for ages. So do what you gotta and we’ll see you soon.”
Queenie forced the words. Though Jacob looked someone confused by the events of the day, it was clear that Queenie was having no debate on the matter. Newt could only look sheepish and Tina sigh before giving a tight nod. “We’ll be back,” Tina answered, feeling the lie come out far too easily. Even if she did, there was no we. Her teeth caught her lower lip as she turned towards the door once more.
“Newt, honey?” Queenie said breaking the silence once more to step forward and grasp the man by the elbow, “go on Teen! It’ll just be a sec.” Tina gave her sister a piercing look but Queenie was as unmoved as ever. She huffed another breath before pulling the door open and shut beside her. She’d no sooner settled on the sidewalk when Newt was following after, redder than he’d been yet that day.
“So?” She inquired, brow arched on her features as she peered up at the man.
“No--nothing,” The man stammered, clearing his throat, his fingers flexing as he moved instinctively to take her own. He grasped her hand and tugged in his usual fashion of running away. “We’ve still got plenty to get settled for our trip, yes? A bit behind schedule--”
“Oy!” Tina exclaimed, “it’s your fault!”
“Is it now?” He remarked dryly, the mischief on the corners of his lips taking away from his otherwise sheepish expression, “now that’s certainly news to me.”
She fixed him a glare that the man refused to wilt even a little under, a clear giveaway to his actions. Tina huffed before adding in a quiet, “Thanks.”
Newt hesitated in his step for a moment. It’s not often Tina relented and the man is surprised to find she does. He cocked his head slightly, lips upturned, before he gently squeezed the hand he held onto slowing to a much more manageable pace. “I always promised that should we leave on an adventure to another continent I would ensure you had a chance to say goodbye to your sister,” He answered softly, “I keep my promises, Tina.”
The only response Tina managed is the coloring in her cheeks and the ducking of her head.
You broke your promise.
The words still rang faintly in her ear.