Chapter Text
It’s only been a few months since everything went to shit. When Pepper calls she’s just gotten out of the shower. She sits down on the motel bed to answers the call with a new alias “Donna Acuna.”
“Hi Natasha. It’s Pepper. The line should be clear. Tony’s been working on them himself and Happy’s interviewed and tagged every employee in the building.”
Natasha smirks, remembering the stunned look on his face when she took him to the mat during her time as Stark’s assistant. “Should probably tell him to go easy on them. You wouldn’t want a lawsuit because he punched someone for staring at you or Tony for too long.” Natasha says, grabbing a cool box of chow mein from the nightstand.
“He’s… well okay, he’s not really any less paranoid but he is more cautious. I think Maria’s been giving him lessons… So- how are you? Are you safe?”
Natasha smiles around her chopsticks, cradling the phone between her shoulder and ear. “I’m safe, Pepper. No need to send everyone out to find me. I took down 16 more since you called last. Possibly 17.”
“Possibly?” Natasha’s heart clenches at the way Pepper’s voice raises a touch. She’s constantly reminding herself that Pepper’s not one of them. She’s not a spy or a superhero, she thinks. Even if she does have actual fire in her veins and dealt the final blow to Killian, she’s still not a killer.
“I shot him. He was bleeding pretty heavily as he limped away. Was too busy to follow him.”
“What’s more important than… stopping Hydra agents?” Natasha notices her hesitancy to say killing.
“I was busy bleeding all over an orange motel carpet at the time.”
“You were shot?!”
“Stabbed actually. Thankfully he left the knife in so I didn’t have much blood loss.”
“Hold on, I’m getting Tony on the line.”
“Pepper, no.” She uses what she calls her mission voice. It’s the voice that makes everyone on her team stop and listen and can even shut up Tony. “I’m fine. The stitches are already mostly healed over.”
“But-”
“Pepper.” Natasha snaps sharply. “I need quiet and darkness to do what I need to and Tony is the equivalent of a New Year’s fireworks display.” Pepper huffs a tiny laugh into the phone. “Besides. We have no idea who we can really trust. He needs to be there, with you. We can’t all be together right now, it’s too dangerous.”
“Okay. But Nat, there’s something that you should know.”
“Oh?”
“Someone’s written a book about you. About what was in the SHIELD files. It’s by a woman named Rebecca Anderson.”
“Well. Kudos to Ms. Anderson. Hope she get the timeline right, because it’s still a little iffy for me sometimes.” The soft inhale from the other end of the line reminds her that Pepper has no idea what it’s like to not know who you actually are.
The thought reminds her of the Winter Soldier and she wonders if he and Steve have found each other yet. Maybe when this is over, and Steve finds him, and Hydra is finished, I’ll stop by. Steve would probably like that. I can tell him some of the things that helped me. For half a second, she wonders if Steve can actually save him. She smiles and shakes the thought away. If anyone could save that ghost of a man, it’d be Steve Rogers. Natasha swallows her smile and readjusts the phone. “So. How’s everyone?”
“Tony’s going a little stir crazy. He wants to be out there with you and the others, tracking down traitors. We sent Bruce to some tiny little village that Tony thinks should be safe for him. He sends coded emails whenever he can. I haven’t heard from Sam or Steve in a few days but I think he would have let us know if they’d found… him.”
“I saw the article from ’91. How’s Tony holding up?”
Pepper sighs deeply and Natasha ignores the pang in her chest. “He was furious at first. Cobbled together the nearest suit with duct tape and was ready to blast out of here. I managed to talk him down enough to talk to Steve and they spoke for a while… Do you think Steve can actually help him?” Pepper asks quietly. “Make him remember who he is?”
“If anyone can, it’d be Steve. They were best friends.”
“I know, Nat. Everyone knows. But is that sort of thing even possible?”
Natasha shrugs and falls back against the bed. “I didn’t need any special machine or super drug to get mine back. There’s no saying Bucky needs anything other than Steve.”
“Natasha. Are you sure you’re okay out there on your own?”
Natasha lets her eyes fall closed. What’d I do to deserve this woman’s friendship, she wonders. I suppose I did sort of save her boyfriend that one time. The thought makes her grin lightly. “Pepper, I’m a super spy. I’m used to being on my own. And if it gets too hard, I’ll just make you fly Hill out to me.”
“Alright, just… be careful, Nat. I hate to let you go but I have a meeting-”
“Don’t worry about it. I’ll get back to you when I can. Stay safe, Pepper and don’t trust anyone.”
“Do you realize how terrifyingly paranoid that is?”
“Not really. I’ve gotten used to it. You can explain to me what it’s like for non-super spies over pizza in a few weeks, okay? See ya, Pep.” Natasha hangs up without hearing Pepper’s goodbye and rubs her face. What the fuck am I doing? Spies aren’t supposed to have friends, let alone world renowned CEOs with no training friends. She looks over at the phone. One of these days, Pepper’s gonna get hurt. And Tony will kill me for it. She sits up and cradles her head in her hands. Hell, I’d probably help him.
She washes her face before putting on a thick rimed reading glasses, a t-shirt large enough to hide her knife sheathes and changes the part in her hair. It’s fairly easy to find the book Pepper was talking about. Its right at the front of the local chain bookstore, in an aisle display along with The Untold Story of Sergeant James Barnes, The Monster Within: the Survival and Redemption of Dr. Bruce Banner, and Machine and Man. The cover bears a photograph from her hearing.
Woman in Red: The Black Widow Unveiled by Rebecca Anderson. Natasha buys all four of them, ignoring those about Tony with a small smile and shake of her head. Natalie Rushman learned more than enough about Iron Man’s background, thank you very much. The skinny young man at the register smiles at her while ringing her up. “You a fan?”
She looks away shyly, playing it up. “I’ve read all about Tony Stark and Captain America. But Banner’s my favorite. He’s so…”
“Mysterious?” he supplies, smiling widely. He rolls up his sleeve to show off a tattoo of the Hulks face. She huffs a laugh. Bruce would probably faint if he ever met this kid. “I mean he had everyone in the country looking for him for five years. And then he just shows up when New York was being attacked and saves Iron Man. How many people can say they’ve saved Iron Man?”
Steve, me, Rhodey, Ho Yinsen, probably Pepper a few times, she thinks. Aloud she says “I know, right!”
“I’m actually working on my dissertation right now, it’s on terrestrial gamma-ray flashes and how artificially created thunderstorms affect them…” his voice fades off when he sees her staring at him. He quickly bags her things, blushing brightly. “Sorry.”
“No, it’s cool.” She glances at his name tag- Nate. She takes the bag from him and looks at him like Barton looked at her all those years ago. Physically weak, minimal physical risk. He’s damn smart though. Hydra has more allies than we do, she thinks, having made her decision. Besides, if he turns on us, I’ll just hunt him down like the others. “I’m Donna Acuna, by the way.” she says offering her hand.
His handshake is weak and his palms are sweaty. She resists the urge to roll her eyes. “Nate. Nate Edmondson.”
“You sound smart, Nate. You should send your resume to Stark Industries. I hear they’re always hiring.”
“You think so?” he asks grinning wildly. She smiles and leaves, looking down to her phone.
Me: I just found someone you and the Big Guy might like. His name is Nate Edmondson. His resume should arrive in a few days. –N
TS: U sure he’s safe? Also, how’d u get this #?
ME: Because I’m better than you. And if he isn’t he’ll see me again and I won’t be as polite. Warning: He’s kinda got a thing for the Big Guy.
TS: I love him already.
She reads while sitting in her car on her stakeout. Anderson’s first several chapters go over Red Room and Ivan and seeing the death toll again makes her want to cry blood. Even now there’s still blood on my hands. The agents that died protecting us in Osaka, the cops and that kid from New York, all those agents at HQ… It takes her several moments longer than usual to force her face back into the cool and impassive stare she wears so often.
She skims the chapters on New York before getting to Chapter 12: Two More Will Follow. Anderson paints her exactly how she always is- the turncoat with a habit of seducing her enemies and allies alike. Really, she thinks, if I’d seduced Steve, I’d taught him to kiss better. According to the sources she had also found time to seduce the Falcon (who thankfully had managed to keep his actual name hidden for the time being) and then run off with the Winter Soldier himself. Natasha laughs out loud. I suppose he’s not too bad looking, in an angry, murderous, hobo with terrible eyeliner sort of way. She recalls the look on his face when Steve first said his name. Though I think the Captain might be a bit more his type.
Finishing the book, she tosses it into the passenger seat and watches the streets, sipping from her coffee. It doesn’t take long for her target to show up. She follows him into the quiet warehouse and he never saw her coming.