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Min Yoongi,
If you’re reading this, it means I succeeded. That I finally got to rest. Fuck writing about it like this feels weird, it shouldn’t feel weird but it does. It’s not like this is the first time I write a letter like this, so why is this any different?
Yoongi, you and I barely spoke. We saw each other every friday, but I don’t think we ever said more than two words to each other. I wish we could have spoken more, but I don’t blame you for not wanting to. Most people wouldn’t. But you were different. You smiled at me, and sometimes I’d catch you listening to my stories. You were so nice to me. I didn’t want to ruin that.
I‘ve spent my entire life creating stories for those who need to hear them. I wish more than anything that I could create some sort of satisfying end to my own story, but I can’t. I’ve tried everything and I can’t whatever I do it just hurts so fucking much and it won’t stop
Sorry for being such a disappointment. I’m sorry for not showing up for storytelling. Please tell the kids that there will always be a place on this earth for them. Please tell them they’re worth so much, no matter what their parents tell them, no matter what their own minds try to convince them of. Please don’t tell them what happend to me. Tell them I had to travel for work, tell them I finally followed my dreams, hell tell them I’m in prison. Just please. Don’t tell them I gave up.
I have to go soon. Seokjin hyung will be home any minute and I need to go if I’m gonna be able to go through with this. Could you please make sure hyung will be okay once I’m gone? He has Joonie, and the others but please. I just don’t want him to think any of this is his fault.
Thank you for letting me give kids the hope for better days that I never had. Thank you for being so nice to me. I think if you and I had been in a story of our own, perhaps we could have been friends. Perhaps we could have been more than that. I think I would have liked that. I think I would have liked that a lot.
Don’t blame yourself for what I’m about to do. I don’t want to live. I’m sorry for leaving but it’s for the best.
Goodbye Yoongi.
Your raconteur,
Jung Hoseok.