Chapter Text
After Harry's first date with Lottie, the families have just casually invited each other over. In the beginning it was quite awkward. When the Tomlinsons came over it was unsettling to have so many people. Especially with the younger princesses,the peaceful quite of the castle was completely lost. The little sisters would bicker and break out into fights.
Harry, tell Phoebe she's a butthead Felicite would shout.
Phoebe would then stomp her foot and say Harry, tell Felicite she's an absolute asshole.
Harry stuttered and quickly try to calm down the sisters as their family audibly gasped at the language. H-hey don't talk to your sister like that. Can't we get along?
For the most part they did get along. The twins loved Harry so much that anytime the Tomlinsons came over, it pretty much meant he was their playmate. Harry never really had any friends as a child so interacting with the twins nurtured that side of him. Playing dolls with Phoebe and Felicite forced him to get his creative juices flowing. Harry even needed to be the mediator between the two due to them clashing ideas. If Felicite said she had super strength and Phoebe wanted that power, Harry would say that Phoebe has flexibility. Sure, Felicite can pick up a building but you can stretch yourself so thin that you can sneak into buildings. Typically little things like that resolved the issue right away. The three of them got caught up in their worlds that sometimes Harry would have to remind himself that it wasn't real. Eyes he can feel watching him snapped him out of it. Half the time it was Lottie watching from afar. Her face softened so much that every emotion she was feeling came out. Without fail, Harry's heart flipped every single time. They would stare at each other, almost as if holding in a breath. A breath they did not want to exhale. The rawness of these moments makes Harry feel...safe. Maybe if Harry is this good with kids then maybe marrying would suit him. Him and Lottie.
Until Harry would look behind Lottie and catch Louis also staring.
For a quick second he can see the same expression on Louis' face. Except it was mixed with something else. It was almost more sad. The softness was still there but it was twisted, as if it hurt Louis. A knot would form in Harry's gut and only grow tighter when Louis realized he was caught looking. He would grimace a small smile but Louis would put on a straight face and casually move away.
What is stopping you from being your 100% genuine self?
That echoed in Harry's mind in every instance he caught Louis looking. He desperately wanted to talk to Louis. He wanted to understand what he was feeling. Oddly, Harry wanted to tell Louis how he felt too. Although the irony is that he honestly doesn't understand how he is feeling. Nor would he be able to explain why. What honestly was stopping Harry?
On one of these nights, Harry was over at the Tomlinson residence. Joanna suggested to have a movie night so here they were sunday night, with popcorn everywhere and loads of blankets.
The twins were on the floor slurping on milkshakes and commenting on every little thing that happened. Harry had situated himself between Lottie and Louis. Initially he didn't think twice about it. The day started off well and they were upholding a fun, light atmosphere. Louis even cracked a joke.
Don't be last to the couch, Lottie. Louis called out before looking at Harry with a mischievous glint in his eye. You don't wanna repeat the time you were last in the track meet after tripping over your own shoe.
What did you just say, Loubear? Lottie said with a smirk, singing the last part.
Louis' jaw dropped. Oh, he said wagging his finger at his sister, you're gonna pay for that.
He chased after Lottie, both screaming with fear an laughter. How dare you call me that! In front of the guest!
They settled down in this teasing, humorous cloud. Louis and Lottie continued doing their typical sibling banter with Harry giggling after every remark. When Tangled started playing, the twins hushed the three of them.
"Shh, the movie's on!" Felicite gave them a burning glare.
When the opening song came on the twins sang their heart out.
Seven a.m., the usual morning lineup. Start on the chores and sweep 'till the floor's all clean
Harry tried to resist joining them but with his love for Disney he couldn't possibly do it
Polish and wax, do laundry, and mop and shine up. Sweep again, and by then it's like 7: 15
His two companions slowly turned their heads to the curly haired boy. Both of their faces were dumb struck. Harry scratched the back of his neck, braving on a smile.
He shrugged. "What? I love Disney and I watched this movie countless of times."
Lottie smiled hard and giggled harder. Harry and Louis joined in no longer after. They continued laughing as if it was the funniest thing to happen on plant earth. Once they were laughing for a couple minutes the twins turned around to hush them once again. Harry apologized still laughing. As his giggles died down, he lay back into the couch's cushions. Harry felt Lottie still looking at him so he peeked at her face. Again, she had the fond face she had when he was playing with the twins. His heart swelled again and just because it felt right, he went to grab her hand and gave it a squeeze. If he didn't notice Louis grimace at seeing the interaction, it didn't bother him.
It was nearing the end of the movie. They were at the scene where Rapunzel and Flynn Rider were on the river during the Festival of Lights. Soon See The Light began playing.
Now I'm here blinking in the starlight
Now I'm here suddenly I see
Standing here it's all so clear
I'm where I'm meant to be
Without Harry's notice, Lottie has managed to snuggle against his side.
And at last I see the light
And it's like the fog has lifted
Lottie slowly reaches for Harry's hand. He cannot help the smile creeping on his face as she does. They interlock fingers. As the song progresses, Lottie looks at Harry.
And at last I see the light
And it's like the sky is new
And it's warm and real and bright
In the dark they aren't able to distinguish much except their eyes. Harry looks into her eyes as it glasses over. The background hazes out. Soon all he can focus on is the music and the girl right in front of him.
And the world has somehow shifted
All at once everything looks different
Wrapped up in this bubble, Harry drifts his eyes to her lips. In that moment all he wanted to do was press his against hers. The thought caused him to smile and slowly...
Now that I see you
Harry closes his eyes and leans toward Lottie. With a sigh, or more like a released breath, Lottie leans to Harry as well. But then their eyes break open as they feel a weight shift next to them. Next thing they see is Louis leaving the room. Lottie earnestly raises her eyebrow in question.
"Don't worry about me," Louis says as what Harry interprets as exasperated, "I just remembered I got something to do."
The twins don't bat an eyelash but Harry and Lottie give each other a worried look. Harry is about to say something before she beats him to the punch. "Ah I wouldn't worry too much. Louis always runs off in the middle of these nights."
Harry nods his head in agreement and tries to relax back into watching the film. It works. For a while. But then he is still worried about Louis. Why would he need to leave? And did he really always leave in the middle of these nights?
After a while Harry excuses himself to the bathroom. Well, that's what he tells the girls. He truly is trying to find Louis' room. As he goes around he wonders. I guess I never noticed that Louis does disappear during these nights. Why does he? Is he really that busy with something else? His thoughts break off when he see the bathroom's lights were on and the door was open. Harry is whiplashed with deja vu from the first night he visited the castle. He timidly knocks on the door with his index's knuckle. "Louis? Is that you?"
"No," Louis replies, his voice seeming strained, "now go away."
Harry slowly opens the door to see Louis's head in his hands as he sits on top of the toilet. "What is wrong?" He asks quietly.
"Nothing. I just needed a moment."
"I understand but it seems something is bothering you."
Louis suddenly brings his head up to glare at Harry. Harry stumbles back in fear. "Nothing is wrong. Leave me alone."
Harry gulps. He didn't expect this intensity. "I'm probably over stepping but there has to be something wrong. Your sister is now dismissing this as normal and-"
"Everything is fine, Styles!" Louis interrupts with venom in his words. "Go back with the girls and enjoy the disney movie you oh so lov-"
"Is this because of how Lottie and I were acting?" Harry blurts out. Louis' eyes go wide as the statements shocks the both of them.
"I-you-what?" Louis stammers.
Harry scratches the back of his neck. "Uh-um-'cause y'know we were-um" He stammers. Harry hoped Louis knew what he was talking about and was what Louis was freaking out about or he was gonna feel like a HUMONGOUS idiot.
"Oooooh." Louis stretched. He then proceeded to laugh hysterically. As if he was going to lose his mind. "Do you think that I was, what, over protective? Jealous?"
Now it was Harry to be stammering. With what he implied I guess that was he was accusing Louis of. Saying it out loud it seemed completely crazy. "Well...I don't know!" He said throwing his arms in the air. "You obviously didn't like what we were doing if you ran away so quickly."
"Styles, you are absolutely crazy." Louis huffed.
"Okay then tell me what is wrong. 'Cause right now it seems that you don't want me to do anything with Lottie." Harry crosses his arms. He stared into Louis' eyes. The younger one then had something dawn on him. "Is this because of that night at the gay ba-"
"No! Do not bring that up!" Louis now looked paranoid. He looked behind Harry and closed the bathroom door. "Are you fucking crazy? You can't just say shit like that!"
Harry winced at his words. "I'm sorry." He spoke softly with his head bowed. Harry heard Louis sigh and resume his position that Harry first found him in the bathroom. Carefully he said, "But is it?"
Louis stopped his movements as if he were thinking. Little by little, he lifted his head. Harry's heart started racing. He couldn't decipher if it was because he didn't want the answer or because he did. " It doesn't fucking matter, Styles." Harry's chest now felt like it was on fire. He felt so hurt. "All I know is you better treat her right, okay?"
Harry decided to sit on the sink. "Are you worried then? That I am not treating her well? Well, I can assure you that I do like Lott-"
"God will you please stop blabbering."
Now it was Harry's turn to be angry. "Dear lord. I don't know what is your issue! I came here because I genuinely wanted to know if you were okay! You seemed really upset and I'm sorry to try to help."
Louis rolled his eyes. "What the fuck do you know, huh? How would you, basically a stranger, know how to help me?" They both now had fire behind their irises.
Harry couldn't help to laugh. A stranger? They were destined to be brothers in law and he called him a stranger. Hell, Harry is sure that he is the only one who knew Louis was gay. Considering how he doesn't like to speak about it. "Fine. I'm sorry I even bothered." Harry started to head out.
The younger one mean to leave without another word.
But he didn't.
"I'm just wondering what is stopping you." Harry called out with his hand on the handle.
"Huh?"
Harry's intense blue met with Louis' confused green. "What is preventing you from being yourself? From being the honest version of you?"
The air felt still. Without realizing it, it was now a stand off. Either Louis needed to admit his barriers or Harry needed to drop it.
The older boy broke the stalemate. "I think it is the same reason as you."
Harry's throat was now caught. The hell was that supposed to mean? Unless...he was saying...
"What do you mean?"
They continued to stare. Suddenly Louis started to tear up. "Just leave, Harry." He whispered, desperately keeping his tears from falling.
Harry should have stayed. He should have reassured Louis that he was feeling the same way. He should've hashed the issue out until I was truly resolved.
But Harry has always been a coward. So he left. He apologized to the other girls, saying that Anne wanted him back home now. Harry didn't bother calling a chauffeur. He walked home. The conversation replaying heavy in his mind.
Does this mean that Louis' worry wasn't if he couldn't love Lottie? What if it was...because he could? But then wouldn't that mean that Louis-
No. He can't even admit it to himself. There was nothing going on. Nothing could happen between them. He needed to marry Lottie.
He finally arrived home. With no words he went to his bedroom. Thankfully, Gemma was already sound asleep. Harry knew he wouldn't be able to sleep and needed some guidance.
"Harry? You good? It's kinda late." Zayn's raspy voice came over the line.
"Um, no? I know it's late but I wanted to ask something." Harry can hear how defeated and sad he sounded but he just needed this.
A rustle could be heard over the phone. "Yeah of course. What is it?" Zayn asked.
Harry took a deep breath in an out. "How did you know that you...y'know..liked Liam?"
Zayn chuckled. "Are you feeling sappy, kiddo?" Without Harry chuckling in response he understood he was serious. "Okay well. I don't know. I think you just know. It was almost like, no matter who else I tried pursuing I would always end up back to him, y'know? It is almost an explainable connection. You don't know why you always end up back together but you just trust that it is right."
Finally Harry smiled. "That is so beautiful, Zayn." The curly head can imagine both of them smiling to themselves. Harry can take that answer. If he always ended up worrying about Louis then maybe that is the universe telling him to.
"Hey, don't get too soft on me, your highness." Zayn cut Harry's thoughts.
Harry groaned but then laughed. "Fuck off, mate." They both quietly laughed. "Thank you though."
"Anytime, kiddo."
"Goodnight, Zaynie."
They hung up and Harry contemplates his options.
What truly is stopping Harry from pursuing Louis?