Chapter Text
Connor wasn’t sure if he should feel relieved or even more stressed than before. Sure, he had finally talked to Zoe, but he was pretty sure that it couldn’t have gone worse. It was clear now just how afraid of him Zoe really was. How had they gotten to this point? When had they grown so far apart?
Connor couldn’t help but wonder when he had grown so distant from everyone else as a whole. He wondered if it was the same reason why he had lost the only real friend he ever had, because he was too afraid to let people in. Connor stared miserably down at his wrists. His days with Miguel seemed like a million years ago.
Eventually Connor’s mind drifted back to the situation at hand. The more he thought about it, the more Connor realized that neither he nor Evan had ever really let the other one in. Sure, he had been there to comfort Evan when he cried and sure, they had written that fake letter together, but their entire relationship seemed built on a lie.
Connor had told Evan that they could pretend like they had friends when he signed his cast. Maybe that’s all they really were to each other; just pretend friends. It would explain why things fell apart so quickly. But Evan did have real friends and Connor hoped he had done enough to help them find each other. He figured that he would need to continue to keep an eye on the situation, but hopefully Zoe would be able to unite Evan and Jared once more. And hopefully she would find friendship with the two of them in return. It seemed like a real possibility.
Connor had to admit that it felt sort of good to be helping others with their problems, but he still had no idea what to do about himself. Could someone like him actually find real friends? Did he deserve them? Once Evan, Jared, and Zoe were all doing okay, should he dare try to reach out to them again? Was there any way that doing that would turn out okay?
Connor was pretty sure that he wasn’t just going to stumble across the answers to these questions. But whatever. This wasn’t something he had to deal with just yet. For now, Connor just wanted to get stoned and forget the world. After everything that had gone down, Connor really just needed some time alone to clear his head.
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Jared was beyond excited. His morning checkup determined that he was in good enough shape to leave the hospital that day. He still had to go to some sort of counseling session, but that wasn’t so bad. Maybe it would even help him sort out all his feelings.
But at the moment, all he could think about was his promise with Evan that they would celebrate his release. Jared was already fantasizing about everything they would get to do together. Oh god, they had so much missed time to make up for.
Jared’s fantasies were interrupted as his door flew open. “I heard the good news!” Evan cried as he ran over to Jared. Jared laughed as a warm body tackled him onto his bed.
“Careful there!” he scolded through the laughter. “I’m still delicate you know. Don’t want any more head injuries.” Evan sat up, concerned. “Are you okay?” he asked, his voice thick with worry.
Jared laughed. “I’m fine,” he assured his friend. Then he shook his head. “No. I’m better than fine. I’m great. I’m amazing!” Jared’s laugh grew louder. “I’m so happy I could burst! My parents are taking me out to pizza and a movie and you’re welcome to come too. Oh god, I can’t remember the last time my family went out to do something like this. I can’t remember the last time you and I did something like this. Can you believe it, Evan? I thought everything was ruined when that letter was posted, but I feel on top of the world now!”
Jared’s celebration was interrupted by a concerned look from Evan and a quiet noise from the edge of his room. Turning to see what was going on, Jared realized that Evan was not the only one who had entered his room.
“I’m sorry,” a rather red-faced Alana said softly. “I didn’t mean to interrupt your moment. I can go now. I just wanted to see how you were doing.” Jared quickly shook his head before Alana could turn to leave. “Don’t worry about it,” he assured her. He then grinned. “I’m sure my parents would be happy to let you come along too. They would probably be thrilled to learn that I was friends with someone so smart and high achieving. They might think some of that brilliance and dedication will rub off on me.”
Jared gave a lighthearted laugh, but Alana couldn’t help but feel a little bad. Didn’t Jared’s parent know how amazing he was just the way he was? Also, “Are you sure your parents will be okay with you hanging out with the person who posted your letter?” Alana asked nervously.
Jared just shrugged. “I never told them who posted it and I don’t think they’re tech savvy enough to figure it out on their own. It’s fine. I’ll vouch for you if you need me to. I’m sure Evan will do the same, right Ev?” Jared asked. Evan nodded emphatically. He was glad to see that Alana and Jared actually seemed to be getting along. Jared really deserved to have some more friends and Alana did seem like a nice person despite her mistake.
“See,” Jared proclaimed. “Now you have nothing to worry about. So come join me and Ev while we celebrate. It will be fun!” Realizing that there was really no reason to object, Alana found herself agreeing. “I’d be happy to join you Jared. I really am thrilled to hear that you’re doing better. And hopefully nothing like this will ever happen again, but if you do ever feel bad again, well, you can talk to me, okay. I promise I won’t make it worse next time.”
Jared and Evan exchanged a glance, each wondering if they should say something. If Alana was going to join in on the celebration, did it make sense to tell her the truth? Alana gave them a puzzled look in response, clearly confused as to what she was missing.
Before either boy was able to make a decision on what to say, much less actually explain anything to Alana, a third visitor appeared outside Jared’s door. “Hi,” Zoe said awkwardly. “There was something I wanted to talk to you about. Is now an okay time?” she asked.
At first Jared assumed that Zoe was talking to Evan and turned to him for a response. “Ev,” he prompted gently before realizing that Zoe’s eyes were locked onto him. “I can come back later if it isn’t,” Zoe assured, her eyes still locked directly onto Jared. “There’s just something important I heard about your letter and I wanted to ask you about it. It’s nothing bad, I promise. I just want to know the truth.”
Jared felt his throat go dry. Zoe said this wasn’t something bad, but how could it not be? And even if it really was just an innocent question, Jared would still need to make up some sort of lie again. He really hated the idea of go further into the rabbit hole when he was finally starting to climb his way back out.
“If it’s not a good time, I can come back later,” Zoe assured Jared. “Is this a conversation that needs to be private?” Jared asked looking around at Evan and Alana. If it were just Evan in the room, he probably would have told Zoe just to say whatever it was out loud to the both of them, but with Alana in the room as well, Jared wasn’t sure.
“Umm,” Zoe began. Her eyes also wandered over to Alana who was trying her best, but failing to keep a smile plastered across her face. “Why don’t I just head out for now,” Alana offered. “I would love to take you up on your offer though. Please let me know when and where to meet you.”
Alana turned to leave, but stopped when she heard a loud “wait!” Jared strained upwards in his bed, poised to hop out and try to grab her. “Wait,” he said again. “Anything that Zoe has to say can be said in front of my friends. I don’t mind.”
Zoe bit her lip and gave Jared a meaningful look. “Are you sure?” she asked, trying to silently convey her worry. Jared turned once more to Evan, a silent plea in his eyes. For a moment, Evan only closed his eyes and took a deep breath. Jared could practically feel his nerves working overdrive, but before he could tell Evan to forget it, Evan opened his eyes once more and gave him a slight nod.
With a sigh of relief then a gulp of apprehension, Jared turned back to Zoe and nodded as well. “I’m sure,” he assured her. “Anything you have to say about that letter is something all three of its players should know about. And any of my secrets it might hold are things I want my friends to know.”
Evan smiled warmly at Jared and gave his hand a squeeze. He was absolutely terrified of what Zoe was about to say and he knew Jared was too, but they weren’t going to back down now. Whatever steps they took next, they would take together. And now it appeared that together included Alana as well.