Chapter Text
The cafe’s storage room was exceedingly frigid. But Namjoon didn’t have the heart to clench his fists or wrap his arms tightly around himself. The marriage documents felt too fragile for that.
“Let me get this straight.” Yoongi exhaled noisily as he pinched the bridge of his nose. “You saw an overcoat just laying on the floor.”
Namjoon stared blankly at the concrete floor, absentmindedly toeing a small lump beneath the overlaying dirty white paint. “Yeah.”
“It was really big, and gray, and almost a little sparkly.”
“For sure.”
“And you could see, even from behind, that the guy sitting next to that coat was exceptionally beautiful.”
Despite everything, Namjoon felt his lips curl slightly upwards. “Widest shoulders I’ve ever seen, hyung. And such pretty black hair, too.” Namjoon recalled how the man – Seokjin, his name is Seokjin – had looked so self-assured. He looked back up at Yoongi, who seemed about ready to explode. “His voice when he was talking on the phone, it was so charismatic and pretty–”
Yoongi groaned in annoyance. “Jesus, you even heard what he sounded like?”
Namjoon’s shoulders immediately slumped back down. “… look, I know I sound really stupid.”
“You heard his voice, saw he was incredibly beautiful, and noticed the large, gray overcoat on the floor. And you’re saying that not even once did it occur to you that the man might possibly be a selkie?”
Namjoon remained silent. The storage room didn’t seem so cold anymore.
“It didn’t occur to you over the past 24 hours that, when you picked up that overcoat and gave it to him, only to get a shocked reaction, that he was a selkie?”
“Look, I didn’t mean it to happen.”
Yoongi laughed incredulously. “Does that matter? He’s now mated to you for the rest of his selkie life, Namjoon.” He stood up angrily. “You can’t just say it was an accident.”
“But hyung!” Namjoon whined, his body rising unconsciously from the floor. “He didn’t look like a seal at all! Everyone says selkies kind of look like a seal, but he just looked so beautiful. And he looked fitter than me, seals are supposed to have blubber and stuff, aren’t they?”
Yoongi stared blankly at Namjoon. “Namjoon, do I look like a vampire bat to you?”
“No, you look like a cat,” Namjoon stated automatically. “But that’s because you’re Yoongi. Yoongi, the person that’s not like other vampires.”
“Yeah, but it’s still pretty obvious that I’m a vampire. No one looks at my pale skin and big canines and goes, ‘Oh, I’m pretty sure that’s a person that just happens to have pale skin and big canines!’ No one’s that oblivious, Namjoon.”
———
“Jimin, how can you be so oblivious?”
“Seokjin hyung, just because he has pale skin and big canines doesn’t mean he’s a vampire. Maybe he’s just a person that, uh…” Jimin flailed his arms about wildly, and Seokjin carefully stepped back. “…um, I don’t know, maybe he just happens to have pale skin and big canines!”
Seokjin stared at Jimin, who just huffed and looked away in the distance. “Jimin, I really don’t think that just happens.”
“Since when did you get so judge-y?” Jimin sighed dramatically, placing his hand against his forehead and swooning dramatically. Then, with a raised voice, Jimin bellowed, “I simply can’t believe–”
“What the fuck Jimin, shut up, shut–”
“That my roommate is so intolerant , so unfo–”
“Jimin, I swear on your fucking pinky–”
“–rgiving, who is now MATED to a complete stranger–”
Seokjin’s ears burned bright red even as the whispers around him rose again in volume, scandalized mothers staring at Seokjin’s back. “Jimin, if you don’t shut up, I’m never cooking for you again.”
Jimin immediately fell silent. “You don’t mean that.”
“Hm. You want to test that theory out? Go ahead.”
Jimin’s mouth opened, an apology obviously at the edge of his tongue when the kitchen door banged wide open.
“Hyung, wait, give me a bit more time–”
The pale barista, who was still very obviously a vampire, was pushing the taller stranger, who was very, very obviously a human, out of the kitchen and into the main area. As Seokjin stared at the barista manhandling the stranger, he felt his body tense up. Yours , his body seemed to hiss. The vampire is touching your mate.
Seokjin bit his lip, his face warming back up with… embarrassment? jealousy? Ignoring Jimin’s inquisitive stare and shit-eating grin, Seokjin stood up. His body seemed to pull him forward, one foot after one leaden foot, until suddenly he stood in front of the stranger.
“Hello,” Seokjin said. Even as his heart thudded rebelliously at the sight of mate, mate, mate , Seokjin’s words flowed well. “I don’t believe I got your name before you ran off to the back of the cafe.”
The stranger sighed audibly. Seokjin’s voice caught in his throat as the stranger looked back up at him, his face bent into an awkward half-smile. A smile that was accompanied by a small, crooked dimple and oh, oh, oh .
“I’m sorry about… about everything.” The dimple deepened, and Seokjin could only look away, away from the stranger’s cheeks and into his eyes.
Pretty pretty pretty pretty
“It’s alright,” Seokjin replied mechanically, even as Seokjin’s body and circumstances instantly contradicted his claim. “It’s alright, just please –” a hint of desperation. Seokjin swallowed. “Your name?”
The stranger extended his hand. A bare, large, soft-looking hand that was holding a bunch of marriage documents, and suddenly Seokjin was brought back into the present.
Jimin stifled a nervous giggle as the vampire barista loudly facepalmed himself. Out of the corner of Seokjin’s eye, he saw the two turn to each other simultaneously. Was that a blush?
The stranger’s hand faltered slightly. Then it was the other stranger’s turn to blush, his cheeks blazing red as he diverted his eyes to the side and lowered his hand, papers. “Ah, sorry, I have the documents, I'm... I’m sorry – my name is Kim Namjoon.”
Seokjin could only stare at this man, this man named Namjoon who was so awkward, so pretty. He was suddenly filled with the urge to yank this man out of the cafe, to bring him back home and drape a large heavy blanket over him and cuddle him into oblivion.
He settled with reaching down to clasp Namjoon’s hand.
The vampire barista looked like his eyes would fall out of his skull if he wasn’t careful enough. Jimin’s jaw was almost unhinged in his shock. But Seokjin’s eyes were fixated on Namjoon. Such a good mate . His blood sang happily as Seokjin felt soft skin and thin fingers and the slightest tremor. Namjoon is a good mate .
“Namjoon.” The words weren’t so heavy anymore, and he felt the urge to see the man blush. “Now I know what to put on the marriage documents," Seokjin said carelessly, plucking the documents back out of Namjoon's hands.
Namjoon squeaked, and Seokjin fixed his eyes on Namjoon’s nervous smile. Trembling dimples. His other hand itched to stroke Namjoon’s s face, itched to give Namjoon full access to himself.
“You know,” interrupted a dry voice on the side. “If you’re giving him bed eyes and you guys are going to get married, you should at least go on a few dates.”
Jimin burst into giggles. “You’re so funny, Yoongi-sshi.”
So the vampire barista’s name is Yoongi , Seokjin thought as Yoongi’s face reddened slightly, his eyes soft with adulation as Jimin laughed quietly. And he thinks I should get to know Namjoon .
Namjoon spoke up abruptly. “He's right, I – I really don’t know you properly. I really should treat you to dinner.” His eyes shone brightly with thinly disguised hope. Suddenly Seokjin felt wildly, irrationally happy at the thought that Namjoon wanted him just as much as he wanted Namjoon. “And I need your number, if–” Namjoon coughed to the side. “if we’re going to get married.”
Seokjin couldn’t get his phone out any faster if he tried.
———
Me
Seokjin-sshi?
Selkie Husband
Jin
Me
?
Selkie Husband
At some point or another we’re gonna move in together
Better start getting familiar pretty soon
Me
;;; fuck sorry about that
Selkie Husband
Just
So yeah
Please just call me Jin
Wait how old are you
Me
Oh sorry I didn’t even tell you that
I’m 25
Selkie Husband
27
Then its Jin hyung to you
Me
Noted
Jin hyung
Selkie Husband Hyung
That’s me :D
Me
Just wanted to ask
When are you available?
Selkie Husband Hyung
hm
I’m free thursday night if thats what ur asking
Me
Okay
Selkie Husband Hyung
I’m paying btw
Me
Literally what
I’m the one that created all of these inconveniences
It’s probably written down somewhere that I have to pay
Selkie Husband Hyung
Hm
Tough shit
Also I’m vegan and I’m not going to eat a plate of salad
No matter how nice the restaurant is
Me
Oh yeah
Dietary restrictions
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
I’m literally what used to be called fish folk
I’m not going to eat a cow
Or a pig
Me
Oof I keep forgetting
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Did you just say oof
Me
Is that offensive to you in some way?
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
No you just
Didn’t seem the
You know
Didn’t seem the type
Me
Uwu
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
If you don’t stop texting me “uwu” s
I’ll make all those myths about sea folk eating people’s meat true
Namjoon stopped texting and stared at the text message for a while. For a brief, shameful moment, he envisioned Seokjin’s lips, tightly wrapped around –
His phone buzzed loudly, interrupting his thoughts.
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Wait
Ew
No
Fuck
Ignore that
The innuendo was funnier in my head
Me
Ahhaha
Lets move on
Haha
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Okay yeah
Me
So
I know this vegan restaurant?
It’s close to the cafe we met at, we can walk there
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
There’s a vegan place???
Close to the cafe?????
How have I never heard about this
Me
Oof
So
6pm Thursday night?
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Yep yep yep
See you then
———
Me
I’m about to piss my pants out of nerves
Why are you so late???
Hyung??
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
…?
Me
Oh
Wrong person sry
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Um ok
Wait
Who's late
Why were you about to piss your pants??
Me
So many questions!
See you later haha
Vegan Selkie Husband Hyung
Kim Namjoon if you do not
———
“You fucking texted him that you were going to piss your own pants?"
"Yoongi, please. Don't?" Namjoon's face was fixed into an embarrassed smile. "Please don't be late next time. I need a baby sitter."
"No shit. You know, you really have to stop embarrassing yourself in front of your own husband.”
“Mate, not husband.”
Yoongi snorted slightly as he rifled through Namjoon’s wardrobe. “Sorry for calling your mate your husband. There’s not the biggest distinction in there.” Without a moment of hesitation, he plucked out a blue silk shirt. "I'm stealing this shirt for today."
Ignoring Yoongi’s heavily sarcastic voice, Namjoon flopped back onto his bed, the squeaking bed springs pushed into the back of his mind and replaced with overwhelming panic. Panic that, when compounded with the fact that he was going on a date with a person he’d essentially forced to mate with him, turned into anxiety roiling in his gut. “Hyung, I know I can’t mess up anymore. But it seems like I can’t stop messing up around Seokjin, from the moment I saw his face.”
Silence. Yoongi’s footsteps drew closer, and the bed sank down next to Namjoon, thin coat hangers clicking against each other as Yoongi laid down the shirt and pants onto the side. “Namjoon-ah,” Yoongi murmured. “You fucking messed up, yeah. But Seokjin didn’t seem like he minded far too much, so maybe…”
Namjoon nodded slowly. “Maybe…?”
“…Maybe there’s a way to undo the mating or something. I don’t know, I’ve never been close to any selkies.” Yoongi sighed, patting Namjoon’s shoulder as well as someone could pet someone else’s shoulder while they were lying down. “Sea folk aren’t really the most open people, you know. And yet Seokjin didn’t even hesitate a single moment when you asked for his phone number. There’s a level of trust that he has with you.”
“But what if it’s all just chemicals and pheromones, hyung?” Namjoon insisted, pushing himself back up. “What if it all wears off a month later, and the most radiant person I’ve ever seen just walks away from me?”
Yoongi pursed his lips tightly. “Well, that makes the two of us.”
Namjoon frowned. “What?”
“Anyways!” Yoongi snatched up the pile of clothing next to him. “If you’re going to have Seokjin think of you of more than just a bumbling mate, you’re going to have to look like a snack on this date.”
And just like that, their normal dynamic was back. Namjoon could feel the edges of his lips threaten to curl upwards even as he pretended to pout. “I’m always a cute snack.”
“Yeah, yeah,” Yoongi said distractedly as he held up a pair of ripped jeans and a white dress shirt several sizes too large. “But you can also be a hot snack.”
———
Seokjin knew it was ridiculous to expect Namjoon to already be at the cafe five minutes before their date. But, according to Jimin’s quiet laugh, he couldn’t quite disguise the drop in his mood after surveying the cafe.
“Seokjin, I told you he might not be here. He didn’t seem the type to be early.” Jimin’s voice was, for some strange reason, wrought with a little tension.
“I wasn’t looking,” Seokjin retorted, because what else could he say? He started preparing himself for the inevitable “was not – was too” exchange with Jimin.
“Oh, okay then.” Jimin said, his voice losing all trace of happiness as he stared at the counter.
“I said, I wasn’t–” Seokjin paused in confusion. “Jimin, are you okay?”
“Fine!” Jimin exploded, his voice shrill and eyes wild. “I’m fine and dandy! Mhm! Not at all sad that the cute barista is apparently not here! I’m great! Thanks for asking!”
A few moments of silence as Jimin panted loudly. Seokjin could feel dozens of eyes on him, a feeling that was becoming all too familiar for him in the cafe. Why did I ask Namjoon to meet me here?
“Sir, are you alright?”
Jimin and Seokjin turned around. “Yes, we’re quite alright,” Seokjin answered quickly to the bemused barista.
The barista burst into a heart-shaped smile when he saw Jimin. “Ah, you’re Yoongi’s beau, aren’t you? Saw you here a few days ago.”
And just like that, Jimin was reduced into shy blushes and downcast eyes. “Does… does he call me that?”
“Call you what?”
“Does he call me his beau?”
“I think he specifically said ‘most beautiful boy he’d ever seen–’ ” Jimin’s blush intensified, and Seokjin would’ve scoffed at the cheesiness of the entire situation, except he was a good friend – “but it’s a bit strange if I call you that, so I’ve shortened it to beau.”
“Oh.” Jimin inched a little closer to the barista, a little away from Seokjin. Then, abruptly, “What’s your name?”
The barista brightened up even further, and Seokjin could feel the way the tight ball of nerves in his stomach untangled itself at the pure excitement radiating off of the barista. “My name’s Hoseok, but some people call me Hobi!”
Jimin stepped a little bit closer to Hoseok. “Hobi, when is Yoongi coming into his shift?”
Hoseok glanced up at Seokjin, and suddenly Seokjin felt a strange urge to hide from Hoseok’s knowing eyes, eyes that danced with mirth and a little bit of knowledge. “Well, he said he was calling in at six today. He’s bringing in his friend. You might know him?”
Seokjin’s face bent into a stupid smile, his heart beating a little bit faster. “I better know him. I dressed up all nice for him, too.”
The sound of chiming bells as the cafe door opened stopped their conversations, and all three of them turned to look at the pair walking through the door.
And Seokjin could hear Jimin gasping in shock. Seokjin could tell that Yoongi had worn something other than his work uniform. Seokjin had eyes; he could see that Yoongi looked good, a blue silk shirt complementing his pale skin.
Seokjin knew that he was easily the most objectively attractive man in the room at any given time; he was a selkie, after all.
But then why was it that Seokjin’s breath came in shorter and shorter gasps as Namjoon walked towards him? Was it Namjoon’s oversized dress shirt and slightly ripped jeans? His slightly done up hair revealing a pretty forehead and pretty eyebrows and pretty pretty pretty –
Oh , Seokjin thought dumbly as Namjoon came to a stop before him. Oh, he’s taller than me, isn’t he?
Oh , he thought dumbly as Namjoon’s lips curled into the widest smile and deepest dimples he’d ever seen, as his eyes squeezed slightly shut.
So this is what it’s like, to fall in love .