Chapter Text
For the past three years, the Fourth of July was always spent in the apartment, but Kristoff never minded. It’s not like he cared about the holiday to begin with, and ever since he moved out of his parents’ place, he knew Sven needed him more than anyone.
It was a hard day for him. No, it was downright miserable.
The curtains were drawn and the lights were turned off. Sven turned on the T.V. for background noise, but he didn’t watch it. He only sat in the living room and stared out at nothing for hours on end.
And Kristoff always sat with him.
He would bring Sven food and water throughout the day and remind him to eat, but besides that, he wouldn’t talk. He would just sit and wait for Sven to speak if he could bring himself to.
This year, it was the same set up, and luckily Anna was joining her family for the town’s festivities, so Kristoff didn’t have to worry about blowing her off.
He really couldn’t be anywhere else.
It was about eight in the evening when Sven finally spoke. “It’s just so fucked up, man.”
Kristoff just nodded, glancing at his friend as he glared at nothing. Sven needed to get his feelings out and he would listen.
“I mean…it’s just so fucking unfair.”
Again, Kristoff simply nodded.
“You know, ten years ago I wasn’t even allowed in half the places in this fucking town.” Sven’s fingers dug into the upholstery of the armchair. His brown eyes were filled with resentment and exhaustion. “And then they just send me off to fight for what? This war wasn’t even about us. And I still went over there and –” He stopped.
It was never easy for him to talk about, so Kristoff sat silently like they had all day and let him take all the time he needed.
Kristoff never went to Vietnam. He knew that Sven had seen and done things that the average person could never imagine.
He was also white; he would never be able to understand the war Sven had to fight each day just by living in their town.
Sven usually took it all in stride. He held his head high and laughed and had fun and just lived because that’s who he was as a person. But he deserved to grieve, too. Grieve what he lost those months overseas and the life he was never allowed while at home.
So, Kristoff just listened. He listened and was there for his friend in any way he could be.
“That shit doesn’t wash off in the fucking sink,” Sven continued, voice far away. “But I thought…maybe, just maybe, when I got back, things would be different. I’d be a hero. I’d be respected. All I got was spat on and called a baby killer. Women still clutch their purses when they see me coming. Nothing changed.” He looked down at the untouched plate of food on the coffee table like he was finally going to touch it, then looked away, clearly not in the mood.
“You need to eat,” Kristoff reminded him for the tenth time that day.
“I will later.” Sven, as well, had repeated this sentence multiple times.
It was quiet again.
Kristoff knew Sven wasn’t paying attention to the time, so he updated him when it was near eight-thirty. “It’s almost time,” he warned him.
Most of all, Sven hated the fireworks. “They expect me to celebrate this country,” he mumbled as he stood up, ready to hole himself in the bathroom; the explosions were more muffled in there than anywhere else in their apartment. “I hate this fucking holiday.”
“I know.” There was nothing more to say.
Sven paused and looked down. “I’ll be better tomorrow.”
“I know. But you don’t have to be. Be fucking angry.”
“I’m too tired.” He left Kristoff in the living room and headed toward the bathroom.
“Hey,” Kristoff said, standing as well. “Let me stay with you. Please.”
Sven nodded silently and pulled his friend into a hug.
No matter how much they ragged on each other, they needed each other; they were brothers in every way but blood.
Kristoff hugged him tighter, and held his trembling form on the bathroom floor as they listened to the fireworks. He didn’t know if the shaking was due to anger or fear. Maybe a horrifying mix of both.
------
“Are you sure this is safe?” Elsa asked from the back of the van for the millionth time, narrowly avoiding a box sliding off a pile of who-knew-what.
“Oh, yeah,” Sven called back, humor shining in his eyes. “The trick is to hold on tight,” he said as he turned another corner.
Being on her knees, Elsa nearly fell over again before Anna caught her arm.
“Come on, Elsa! This is fun! Just sit on your butt.”
Slightly grumbling, she situated herself on the floor of the VW van since the seats had been removed in the back. “Hey, Anna, why don’t you ask your boyfriend why he’s okay with you riding in this death trap?”
“Hey!” Sven rubbed the steering wheel. “Don’t listen to her, baby, you’re perfect.”
“Because I wanted to,” Anna said, shrugging.
“I couldn’t talk her out of it.” Kristoff turned to look at them from the front. “And she insisted on the back. You know what she’s like – I can’t say no to her.”
“Aw!” Anna clambered up to her knees and gave him a quick peck on the cheek.
“Okay, but why do I have to ride in the back?” Elsa asked.
“Because I wanted to sit next to my sister,” Anna pouted, giving her wide eyes.
“Oh, don’t look at me like that,” she said, already giving in. She crossed her arms, but a small smile traced her lips.
“I told you,” Kristoff said. “It must be her eyes; you can’t say no.”
“That’s because I’m a witch,” Anna purred as she crawled back up to him and wrapped her arms around his neck from behind. “I’m a love witch and I put you under my spell; I slipped love potions in your food.”
“That explains why everything tastes sweeter when you’re around.” He turned his head to look at her and Anna wasted no time putting her lips to his.
“Ugh,” Elsa groaned from the back.
Neither of them listened and their kiss grew heated until Sven swerved suddenly to the side and laughed when Anna toppled over.
“Quit shoving it in us single people’s faces!” He grinned as he swerved back.
“You’re just jealous because the only relationship you’ve had in months is with your car,” Kristoff said, smugger than his usual demeaner.
“Damn straight. And I love the girl, but I can’t exactly fu–”
“Are we almost there?” Elsa interjected from the back. “Please tell me we’re almost there.”
“Yeah, yeah.” Sven smiled at her in the review mirror. “We’re almost there.”
True to his word, he soon drove off the dirt road and into an open, grassy field.
It was such a beautiful day that he’d suggested they go to this place right outside of town. True, he told them he typically went there after dark with some people from work to get high, but he assured them it was really nice during the day.
Setting up their blanket by a large tree, the four of them sat out under the sun, joking and sharing stories, eating the miscellaneous snacks they’d packed, and Elsa and Sven even found an unexpected connection over their opinions on arthouse films.
Eventually, Sven claimed the blanket as his napping spot.
Elsa had brought her art supplies in the van, so she set them up nearby and began painting the new landscape.
Kristoff and Anna sat in the grass, in their own little world.
Kristoff laid his head in Anna’s lap as she made a daisy chain with the flowers that sprouted out of the ground.
She was wearing a white dress and as she smiled down at him, the sun created a halo effect around her hair. Kristoff hadn’t believed in angels until that very moment.
He plucked a flower that was resting by her freckled leg and reached up to slide it behind her ear.
Anna beamed at him and kissed his palm. “I love you,” she said as she placed her thin flower crown on his head.
“I love you, too.”
Carefully sliding out from under his head, Anna laid down next to him in the grass.
Kristoff looked up as if he could see past his forehead. “You know that Sven is going to tease me about this for the rest of my life,” he joked, referencing the flower crown.
“But you’ll wear it for me?”
And with those eyes, of course he would. He would wear it until they all died and fell apart. “I love it.” He leaned in to kiss her and Anna hummed out of pure joy.
“Kristoff?” she asked when they separated.
“Yeah?”
“I was thinking…” Looking into his dark eyes filled with sunlight, Anna took a deep breath. “What’s going to happen to us?”
“What are you talking about?”
She worried her lip between her teeth. “I mean…when I go to school in the fall. I just want things to stay like this forever.”
Kristoff took her hand in his and interlaced their fingers. “I’ll wait for you.”
Her blue eyes sparkled. “You will?”
“Jesus, of course. Anna, you – you are the love of my life.”
She couldn’t hold back and kissed him again, full and deep.
“This isn’t just some summer fling,” he promised against her lips before kissing her again.
Anna giggled and crawled on top of him. “So I guess you’re stuck with me then, huh?”
“Looks like it.”
“Hey.” A playful smile spreading across her face, Anna gently stroked his jaw. “What do you say we gross Elsa out some more?”
Kristoff rolled them over and grinned at her wild laughter. “Sounds like an excellent plan.” He kissed her softly at first, teasingly, but Anna quickly deepened it, her hungry lips craving his.
It was nonverbally decided that the rest of their outing would be spent rolling around in the grass.
“Have fun explaining the grass stains!” Elsa called over to them.
“Have fun minding your own business!” Anna responded before she went right back to kissing Kristoff.
------
“I’m sorry you don’t feel well, sweetheart,” Iduna said as she checked Anna’s forehead for the fifth time. “I don’t feel a fever.”
“I think it’s just a bug,” Anna said in the best sick voice she could muster. Did she look sick enough? Either way, her mother seemed to buy it.
“I know everyone will miss you today, but you just need to stay in bed and rest.” She pulled the comforter up to her daughter’s chin.
“Thanks, mom.”
“Dear, we’ve gotten all the dishes in the car,” Agnarr told his wife as he entered Anna’s room. “We should be home in a few hours,” he said, looking at Anna kindly. “Feel better, darling. We’ll tell everyone you say hello.”
“I’d really appreciate that.” She felt like she was laying it on a bit thick.
Her mother kissed her on the forehead and her parents gave another goodbye before they closed the door softly behind them.
Anna waited impatiently as she heard the front door close and counted to thirty. A slight drizzle tapped against the window and she strained her ears to hear a car leave the driveway.
When she did, she ripped off the covers and ran down the stairs to make sure her father’s car was gone. Sure enough, it was.
She was alone. She had the house to herself for at least three hours; she knew how long those church tent picnics lasted.
She ran to the phone in the front hall and dialed her favorite number. “They’re gone,” she said as soon as the line was picked up.
It felt like no time at all until Kristoff was in her room, kissing her in the way that made her dizzy.
Anna had loved greeting him at the door instead of her window, and she played hostess, offering him drinks and showing him around, but it didn’t take long for them to end up where they really wanted to be.
She’d put on a nice record and they necked on her bed, their heavy petting scored to the music and the now-heavy rain pounding on the house.
Anna moaned as Kristoff pressed against her, his hardness making contact with her thigh.
“Do you want to?” he asked breathlessly against her lips.
“God yes,” she gasped, arching her back to meet him.
Trying not to break the kiss, Kristoff blindly reached into his back pocket and pulled out a condom before reaching out to place it on Anna’s nightstand.
Anna pulled him back to her and kissed him desperately.
Kristoff broke away only to bite down her throat, and Anna tilted her neck to give him better access. She whined as he sucked on her sensitive skin, her eyes fluttering open right as his hand traveled down to play with the zipper of her shorts.
She practically made eye contact with the figure hanging from the crucifix on the wall. “Wait,” she said, turning away from Kristoff.
“Are you okay?” he asked, looking down at her, worry in his eyes.
“Yeah, it’s just…I can’t do this with him watching.”
Kristoff sat up and actually looked around the room. “Uh…who?”
Still laying down, Anna blushed and pulled her hands up to her chin. “Jesus,” she whispered, glancing at the crucifix before looking back up at Kristoff.
“Oh…” He looked at the wall piece for a second. “We don’t have to –”
“I want to!” Anna assured him. “I just – um, do you think you could move him? I can put it back later, but for right now…”
“Oh, yeah.” Getting off the bed, Kristoff crossed over towards the door. “Uh, where do you want it?”
“Oh! Um…” Spying her chair, Anna pointed to it. “Maybe under that pillow?”
Kristoff lifted the crucifix off its hook and hit it under the pillow on Anna’s chair. “Is that better?”
“Much.”
“We really don’t have to do this if it’s uncomfortable for you here,” he said as he sat on the side of the bed.
“I really, really want to.” She looked up at him through her lashes. “Let me show you just how much I do.”
Kristoff practically pounced on her and Anna only had a second to laugh before his lips were on hers again. Her senses simultaneously heightened and diminished; every hair on her body stood on end, but all she could hear was her hushed name on his lips.
His perfectly practiced fingers began to unbutton her blouse. She reached for his belt and undid the buckle as he groaned into her mouth.
When they heard the rushed footsteps up the stairs, it was too late.
The door flew open and they broke apart, Anna’s heart nearly beating out of her chest.
Elsa stood at the door, alarm in her eyes. “It got rained out –” She didn’t get to say another word before their mother’s voice filtered in from the end of the hall.
“Elsa? I was just going to check on her.”
“Fuck!” Previously frozen in shock, Kristoff pushed himself off of Anna and stumbled off the bed.
“Shit, shit, shit!” Anna scrambled up and worked on fixing her shirt as Kristoff fumbled with his belt.
Terrified, Elsa gripped her braid and wordlessly tried to stop their mother to no avail.
“Anna? Are you feeling any –” As soon as she stepped into the room, she screamed.
“Mom, listen! I can –” Anna looked at Kristoff helplessly, then back to her mother. She couldn’t explain. They were in a clearly disheveled state, the sheets on the bed were pulled back, and a wrapped condom sat on her nightstand. She couldn’t pretend that they were just messing around this time.
They were officially caught.
“Anna!” Iduna could only scream again, her hand over her heart, looking on in complete horror.
“Iduna?” Agnarr called in alarm from the first floor, clearly reacting to his wife’s screams.
“Mom, shh!” Fully panicking, Anna pleaded with her mother. “Please! Don’t –”
Elsa paled at the sound of their father’s footsteps pounding up the stairs.
Anna whipped around to look at Kristoff, who’s eyes were filled with nothing but devastating resignation.
He knew what was coming just as well as she did.
“Iduna? Anna?” an imposing voice called out, and everyone froze. “What’s going on?” He burst into the room.
The silence that followed was so deafening that it drowned out Anna’s heartbeat.
He only took one look at the scene in front of him before he acted.
“Dad, don’t!” Anna cried as his face twisted in fury and he stormed across the room to Kristoff.
The crack of her father’s open-palmed smack against her boyfriend’s face shook Anna to her core.
Iduna and Elsa gasped as the violent sound faded into the music flowing through the room.
“Son of a bitch!” Agnarr grabbed Kristoff’s collar forcefully and pulled him down to eye level. “What the fuck are you doing with my daughter?”
Anna had never heard him curse like that before; she’d never seen him act so violent.
Even her mother didn’t chastise him for his language. She just covered her mouth with her hand and began to cry.
Kristoff could easily overpower the older man, but Anna knew he would never fight her father, so he took the assault silently.
“Answer me, you piece of shit!” Agnarr’s face was red and he pulled at Kristoff’s shirt before slamming him against the table supporting the turntable.
The music skipped and cut off as the needle flew off.
“Stop!” Anna ran to her father and grabbed at his arm. “Dad, stop!”
Agnarr ripped his arm away, shaking her off, causing her to stumble.
“Agnarr, please,” Iduna finally sobbed out.
He only slammed Kristoff against the table again. “What did I tell you about putting your hands on her?” He was screaming. Louder than Anna had ever heard him before.
Kristoff spoke for the first time, his voice surprisingly calm, although Anna could hear his anger beneath the surface. “She doesn’t belong to you.”
He was answered with another slap across the face, but once again, he didn’t retaliate.
Anna knew he didn’t react out of respect for her and her family, but she couldn’t stand watching it. “Stop!” Staring to cry herself, she tried pulling her father off Kristoff again.
“You little shit, come here!” Pulling Kristoff away from the table, Agnarr shoved him towards the door, pushing Anna away in the process.
“Anna –” Kristoff turned back to her.
“No – you don’t get to talk to her!” Agnarr shoved him forward again.
“Kristoff! Dad, wait!” Anna rushed to follow them out of her room, but Elsa held her back.
“Anna, no –”
Struggling against her sister’s grasp, Anna heard more yelling from down the hall and her mother’s cries as she sat herself down warily on her daughter’s bed.
Breaking free, Anna ran down the hall; her father continuously pushed Kristoff as he chased him down the stairs.
“Get out – get out of my house!” Grabbing Kristoff by the collar again, Agnarr ripped open the front door and pulled him out into the rain.
He shoved him down the slick driveway with Anna running behind them.
“Dad! Let him go!”
“Anna, don’t worry about –” Kristoff tried to defuse the situation, but it only made her father angrier.
“If I ever see you on my property again, I swear to God I’ll kill you,” he threatened, finally letting him go as he thrust him into the street.
Immediately, Agnarr turned on Anna, grabbing her wrist roughly. “You’re coming with me, young lady – right now!”
“No! Dad –”
He pulled her back up the driveway, jerking her along when she tried to look back at Kristoff, but it was difficult to see through the rain.
“Ow, dad, you’re hurting me!”
“Good.” He opened the passenger side door of his car and all but threw her inside. “Get in.”
Crying, Anna found herself shaking as he slammed the door shut.
She was such an idiot. Why did she take such a risk? And Kristoff got hurt because of it. She wanted to play perfect hostess, and instead she’d created a perfect storm.
Soaked through with rain, her father got into the driver’s seat and started the car. “Did you let that boy touch you?” he asked harshly, pulling out of the driveway faster than was safe.
Humiliated and ashamed, Anna cried, turning back to watch Kristoff’s outline disappear in the rain as they drove away. “I love him,” she said, her voice quivering.
“You cannot possibly be that stupid!”
Anna felt her heart clench painfully at his cruel statement.
“I raised you better than this!” He was yelling again, his knuckles white as he gripped the wheel. “This is what I was protecting you from: men who take advantage of naïve young women. But you knew better!”
“Kristoff would never take advantage of me; he loves me!” Anna fought back, refusing to let her father talk bad about him.
“How long?” Agnarr asked, voice suddenly quiet.
“Where are we going?” Anna’s sniffles were nearly swallowed by the pouring rain.
“How long?” Repeating himself, his volume increased.
“…Since May.”
Slamming on the breaks, the car halted to a stop as Agnarr glared at his daughter. “May? This whole time – you’ve been giving yourself to that boy this whole time? You’ve been going behind our backs?” His tone was nothing short of accusatory.
“I’m eighteen years old!” Anna cried out in frustration. “And I’m dating someone; so what? What is so wrong with me having a life?”
Her father was stone-faced as he began to drive again. “I gave you a life. Your mother and I gave you a good life. And this is how you repay us? Throwing away your virtue? Lying to us? Sneaking around? Sinning under the very roof,” he hit the steering wheel, “that I provided for you?”
Anna remembered what Elsa had told her the first time she slept with Kristoff and took a deep breath. “But…I didn’t do anything wrong,” she said, wishing she sounded more confident. In her heart, she didn’t regret anything, but in her current situation, she felt small, vulnerable, and guilty.
“Oh, you didn’t?” Agnarr’s voice turned even colder.
Anna felt a chill creep up her spine and slid down in her seat, her wet hair freezing against her neck.
“Do you really believe that? Do you think that absolves you? God sees everything, Anna. But you know that.”
Even through the heavy sheets of rain, Anna recognized the route they were taking to their church.
She nodded silently.
“And how long did you think you could keep this from me? You hid it because you knew it was wrong!”
“I hid it because I knew you’d react like this!”
“Because I will not have my daughter acting like one of those trashy girls over on Dogwood street!”
His sudden volume caused more tears to slip out as his words hit her like the slap he gave Kristoff.
“Do you think I want people to know that my youngest daughter is tramping around with some boy? That she values herself so little?”
So it was about appearances, too. Anna shouldn’t have been surprised. But the word ‘tramp’ wounded her deeper than she could’ve imagined; she felt like garbage.
“Successful men don’t want loose women with loose morals,” Agnarr continued, his rage cooling into a simmering vexation. “I won’t let you throw away your reputation and future prospects because of this…unfortunate predicament.” He was quiet for a moment, eyes on the road. “I only want what’s best for you.”
Anna told herself that’s what he wanted, but then why couldn’t she believe it?
So, she didn’t respond. She wanted to tell him that she loved Kristoff, that she didn’t care about ‘future prospects’ because he was the only future she wanted. That he wasn’t just ‘some boy’; he was the love of her life. But she was shaken and mortified, and wanted nothing more than to disappear.
Agnarr stayed silent for an entire minute before he spoke again. “You asked where we were going. We’re going to have a chat with Father Larsen; see what can be done about this. We need to fix this behavior now so it doesn’t continue in college. That is, unless you want to stay home and study at a state school.”
The thought of not being able to move out made her feel nauseous and she shook her head vigorously. “No – no, I’m sorry! I’m so sorry.”
“You’re sorry you were caught.”
Anna couldn’t argue and stayed quiet, upset in every sense of the word as her fingers curled into her palms, her nails digging into her skin.
“If you want my forgiveness, and His,” her father emphasized, “you’re going to have to work for it.”
She could only nod again.