Chapter Text
"I don't care what anyone fucking thinks of me, nevermind you." Michael spat at the throne, showing his immediate distaste. His outfit seemed torn down to a ragged hoodie and bloody yellow worn shorts, his feet bare and his knees covered in bandages, soiled with blood. The man's curls were deshelved to say the least. His face piecing the rest of this unsightly story together. His lip had split, trailing dried on blood down his chin and bags sat comfortably under his eyes, taking easy residence. To top it all off his cheek shone with a bruise that swelled slightly and was starting to turn yellow..
"Michael 'Rage Quit' Jones. Name at least doesn't lie," Lucifer replied as he sized up the man, a grin on his face. "I have an offer for you."
Michael's lip curled in disgust, and I seriously thought he just reopened his cut from this dramatic lip movement. "What can you offer me? Dickweed."
"Oh Michael, I can give you your own world, to destroy as you see fit." He replys with a sly grin, as if he was really trying to coax this one into the offer.
"Fuck. You." Michael snapped back. Lucifer sighed at the man, his eyes rolling as he waved his hand off at the other. "Get him out of here then. Again. I am not in the mood to waste my time with this right now."
The mist shifted.
Michael looked worse now, if that was even possible. His eye was swollen shut, right above the swollen eye was a cut that was in need of urgent stitches. His throat had a bruise wrapped around it, the perfect size for a regular sized man's hand. His hair was soaked through with blood, making several tusks of his hair stick together and in every direction there was.
"Do you accept now?" The king asked with a bored expression on his face, his fingers with longer nails than a proper man would have, started tapping onto the armrest of his grand throne.
"You know the answer." Michael replied back in a soft voice.
"For gods sake Michael! She isn't here! I am not lying to you I swear it on my pride-."
"Pride!?! What kind of pride can a jerk off like you have? I want my wife!"
"You wound me Michael. I have much pride and much reason to. I mean I am the king of hell," the man boasted with a slight chuckle. "Now I will ask you one more time.."
"Fuck. Yo-" But before Michael fould finish these words he was choking on them. Literally. His eyes widened in horror as he grabbed onto his throat, though there was no physical thing grabbing onto his throat.. Only the king using his.. Powers. "Throat.. Collaspi.." This was the only thing Michael could choke out before he fell down to the floor, his face already turning red from lack of oxygen and fear..
I don't want to see this shit..
And with that thought, it all seemed to go black. I felt, weightless. Falling into a void, but slowly. As if running throught molasses. It was.. Relaxing.. But of course. It didn't last long.
"What do you want in my kingdom? I can assure you nobody will rub your dick here."
"I came to strike a deal. You know how we puerto ricans are.. We rely on white supremacy."
No. Wait. I can't see.. What is happening? I know that voice..
My vision, or lack thereof then went to static as the voices continued. Though now they seemed like just noises made with their mouths. None of it was making sense, and I started falling faster.. Faster..
"Fuck! Wake up asshole! You can't do this to me right now!" My heavy eyes opened then to meet a face of stubble and black framed glasses. His brown eyes and furrowed eyebrows showing worry but also fear.
"W-what happened?" I asked as I sat up rubbing my head softly as I looked around.. We were in a hall? Blue carpeting lined the floor as the walls were pure stone on both sides. All that hung on the walls were bear heads, a trophy of some sort that hunters would have in their creepy house.
"We were escaping. You couldn't see and kept mumbling, I had to fucking hold your hand and lead you down the hall like a thirteen year old eager for his first blowjo-."
"Ha! Where are you Ray! Come out, come out, you man fucker!" Michael. It was Michael for sure, and not that far away..
Ray's face went paler than any thing I'd ever seen before. "You here to finally pay for your side of the deal?!" I didn't even get time to process this sentence in my dazed state before Ray had got me up and running again.
"I know the way out! We have to leave now!" Ray yelled, his voice and tone actually serious for once.
"No, I felt like stopping and smelling the fucking roses!"
"You can smell my roses when we are safe!" He rounded a sharp corner, suddenly, and my attempt to stop was assisted greatly by the wall my side slammed into. I let out a huff for a moment and looked back down the hall we had run from, and of course, Michael's minions were right on our trail. I let out a soft yelp as I took off running down the other hall, following Ray and ignoring the soft tingling in my arm for absorbing most of the impact of the wall.
"Get ready!" Ray yelled just as I caught up to him. His cape was flapping tauntingly right in front on me. The urge to pull him down with his cape was strong, but I had to resist at a time like this. No time for jokes..
"Ready for what?" I yelled to him from behind, huffing and puffing more than I ever in my miserable life and death, have.
He didn't answer right away, but as we rounded another sharp corner ( again thank you wall for the assist. ) and came across a hall with one opened window he replied simply. "Parkour."
And as we got to the window, he did just that, swiftly leaping out of the window in a would-have-been-gracious dive if he didn't bash his shoulder against the window sill. I came to a stop at the window with windened and horrified eyes at what I just witnessed. I quickly craned my head out the window and looked out to see the man fall about two stories onto the ground with a puff of sand and a faceplant that will last the ages.
This man is fucking nuts if he thinks I'll jump..
But when I looked over and saw the minions gaining, all I could think of is that the King of Rage will rape my asshole for running, and whadda know, I was suddenly flying through the air.
In a downwards motion.
~•~•~•~•~•~•~
"I still have sand in my fucking pants."
"Bro. I fucking ate a faceful. I don't want to hear you complaining about getting a bit of sand lovin'." Ray replied as we walked away from our defeat. I mumbled a bit as my feet dragged along the barren wastelands.
"So I think we call that a mission failure."
"No fucking shit Ray." I snapped back.
"On the flip side, I got that rose you could smell." At this I looked over at Ray with the biggest glare I could give.