Chapter Text
“Take a seat, Sirius.”
McGonagall's voice was soft, but firm enough that Sirius didn’t dare disobey. He sat down on the usual chair he sat in whenever he was called into her office—mostly for detentions with James—and pulled his legs up so that his chin was rested atop his knees. The position made him look pathetic, he was sure, but he really didn’t care. He felt so humiliated and small already, why not just try to make himself disappear?
He could sense McGonagall’s gaze on him but refused to meet her eye. He didn’t want her to see him cry and he knew that if he saw any sort of concern in her face, he’d lose whatever composure he’d been trying to keep together since leaving the Great Hall.
“Is Remus in trouble?” He said, hoping that by asking about his friend she might forget to talk about him.
“He has detention with me this evening.”
Sirius just hummed in response, picking at the laces on his not-dress-code-approved boots. The image of Remus punching Thomas flooded back into his mind and he felt his throat grow tight. Sure, Remus punched Thomas, got him pretty good, too, but Remus probably thought Sirius was a whore now. There was no chance that Remus could love him now, not when those godforsaken rumors finally reached his ear. Gods, the whole fucking school had to have heard by now and they were all going to think—
“Sirius?”
He looked up to see McGonagall looking at him, one thin eyebrow raised in question.
“I’m sorry, did you ask me something?” He asked, feeling heat rise to his cheeks.
“I asked if you’ve been experiencing any other harassment as of late?”
Sirius stared at her, the words on the tip of his tongue.
Stephen Perry cornered me in the locker rooms after the Quidditch game asking if my ass was as good as everyone says it is. Abram Defreis tried to stick his hands down my pants while we were making out and told everyone he had succeeded even though he hadn’t. Both Richie Wadsworth and Quentin Dall said I blew them behind the hidden tapestry in the corridors and Thomas Greenway has been harassing me all week trying to get me to sleep with him and now the whole school thinks I’m a whore because I rejected him and he lashed out.
“No,” he said instead, his stomach feeling sick, “not really. I guess Thomas just got a little upset.”
McGonagall stared at him for a long moment, a look of disbelief and concern on her face before she finally nodded.
“Okay. But Sirius? If you ever need to talk to someone or experience anything like this —whether it happened in the past or not—my door is open.”
Sirius nodded once, a few tears finally escaping his eyes before he stood and exited the room.
***
It was a few days later that Sirius found himself back in McGonagall’s office. After talking with both James and Remus, they had insisted that he tell their head of house the whole truth as to what was going on. He had refused vehemently for awhile, but he finally had to cave when Lance Yearsley pushed him up against the library books and stuck his tongue down Sirius’ throat after claiming that “he wanted his turn before the Gryffinwhore became too loose.”
Ms Pince had heard the books Sirius had been holding fall to floor as he tried to push Lance away and quickly split them up once she reached them, sending a very angry Lance to Dumbledore and a very distraught Sirius to Professor McGonagall.
So there he sat, in her office with tears stains on his cheeks and tea that had gone cold sitting in front of him. He wished that Remus was there. Remus had been so comforting the past few days. Ever since Sirius realized that his feelings were reciprocated and that Remus in fact did not think he was a whore, they decided to test the waters as boyfriends and Sirius couldn’t remember being so happy in his life.
Both Remus and James had been wildly protective and even Peter had made sure to stick close to Sirius so that no one would try anything, and Sirius thought he was safe. Safe enough to go the library alone to get a few books.
Apparently he was wrong.
“I don’t know how it escalated.” Sirius finally said. McGonagall had been waiting patiently for him to breach the subject, not wanting to pressure him, but needing the truth all the same. “Sure, I’ve kissed a few blokes but...I haven’t...I don’t know why it’s become this.”
It felt like some sick joke. Like everyone decided to target him because why? Because he was proud of who he was? Because he was an openly gay pureblood? Because he was disowned from his family so there were no consequences to messing with him? Sirius couldn’t figure out which one it was, but either way, he felt fucking dirty.
“Sirius,” McGonagall said, “I need you to tell me as much as you can about who has been doing this to you and what has been done to you.”
And so he does. He tells her everything. About Stephen, Abram, Richie, Quentin, Thomas and Lance and how he doesn’t feel safe being alone anymore, how he is practically attached to James’ hip during Quidditch practice and how he waits to leave class with Peter or Lily so he’s not walking the halls alone and how he cries himself to sleep in Remus’ arms because he hates what he’s become in peoples minds. He tells her everything.
By the end, he’s in tears, but he feels so much lighter. And the angry but determined look on McGonagall face is reassuring as she pulls him into a tight hug.
“I promise you that I will have it all taken care of. You do not have to be scared here, Sirius, not while I’m around. If you have any trouble at all—for anything—tell me and I will see that it is taken care of.”
And Sirius felt like he could finally breathe.