Chapter Text
Patton burst through the front door of the city library, sprinting to the front desk with sweat on his cheeks and the book clutched to his chest. “I’m so sorry!” he said, slamming the book down and digging through his pockets for money to cover the late fee. “I totally forgot it was overdue, I got really busy—“
“Shush. You are disturbing the other readers,” the librarian interrupted. The librarian was a man with dark hair, a sharp jawline, and a carefully pressed shirt. He wore a blue striped tie with several pins and buttons promoting library programs, each tacked on the tie in a tidy geometric stack. On the breast of his shirt was a small name tag with the name “Logan Crofters” written in a perfectly neat handwriting.
Logan checked the computer in front of him and opened the book to scan it in. He paused, narrowing his eyes. “What is this?”
“It’s the book I borrowed,” Patton said, a bit confused. “I picked it up here a month ago? It’s checked out under the name Patton Sa—“
“I know it’s a book,” Logan cut in. “Third edition, ‘An Annotated Look at Malleus Maleficarum and Ancient Demonology.’ Originally by Heinrich Kramer, this is a modern examination of the texts and the existence of the supernatural.” He leaned forwards, looming over Patton. He pointed at the book, almost accusingly. “What I was asking about if what appears to be a series of burns at the edge of the pages.”
Oh, right. The book did get a little on fire when he’d summoned Deceit.
Patton’s hand instinctively reached up to touch the pocket where Deceit was coiled and hiding. “Oh! Uh. I thought it was a… cookbook. And I left it near the stove! On accident, I’m not a book vandal. I just get, uh, really fired up about reading! Haha. Yeah.”
‘You really are terrible at this,’ Dee’s voice observed from the back of Patton’s head. ‘When was the last time you talked to another human, clown college?”
“Shh!” Patton whispered at his pocket.
Logan raised an eyebrow, crossing his arms. “Based on a cursory glance, there seems to be no serious damage to the contents of the book. Trimming the damaged paper may be reasonably done, so be grateful your clumsiness did not destroy this book,” he said, resting his hand gently on the book cover. “There will be an additional fine for damages, of course. If this proves to be a pattern, I will speak to the director about prohibiting you from checking out any further books.”
“Right,” Patton said sheepishly, grabbing his wallet. “I really am sorry.”
‘This is ridiculous. Are you even trying to befriend him?’ Deceit scoffed.
Patton’s face burned with embarrassment. “Oh! Sorry, my phone is ringing—I really have to take this, give me a minute,” he said to Logan. Before Logan could point out there was no ringtone, Patton hurried a few feet away, pressing his phone to his ear.
“Dee, you’re making it really hard to focus!” he said in an anxious half-whisper. “Besides, we’re not here because of the pact. We’re here to return my library book. Not everyone can be friends, and I really don’t think he likes me. We can find people to be friends with after.”
The tip of Deceit’s snout poked out just above Patton’s pocket, flickering his tongue. ‘Sounds like someone’s making excuses if you ask me,’ he hissed.
“It’s not that easy,” Patton said firmly.
‘Oh please,’ Deceit said. ‘Even I could do it. If a monster from Hell can then you absolutely have no excuse.’
Patton sighed. “Okay, okay, I’ll try! But if he gets more annoyed than he already is I’m stopping and we can find someone else, okay?” He pressed a finger to Deceit’s snout, gently pushing the yellow snake back down into hiding.
Putting the phone in his pocket, Patton walked back to the library desk, drumming on it with a sheepish smile. “Hey! Sorry about that. My job called me. It was about working things and stuff,” he said. “So, um, how much was that fine again?”
“Fifteen dollars,” Logan said.
‘The fine is not going to win his affection,’ Deceit said. ‘Target his weaknesses. Find that which makes him vulnerable and exploit it.’
As Patton fumbled to open his wallet, he started going red in the face. “So, kiddo! This is a pretty nifty job you’ve got! You must really like books, huh.”
There was no visible change in Logan’s expression, but he did lift his head slightly. “It is an acceptable career, yes. Though I am hardly a ‘kiddo.’”
Okay so that wasn’t exactly a lot to continue the conversation with. “Sorry about that ki—um, Logan! You sure got a lot of books piled up here!” Patton said, pointing to a tall stack of books on the desk, precariously balanced. “Been having a lot of returns today?”
“No,” Logan said, adjusting his glasses. “That is my personal reading material for when there is downtime on the job.”
“Really?” Patton picked up the first book, squinting at the title. “On the Nature of String Theory and Associated Repercussions. Boy, that’s a mouthful! How long does it take you to read this stuff?”
For the first time, a small, self-satisfied smile crossed Logan’s face. “That pile is my reading for today. It is a slow time of week, and due to my words-per-minute being considerably above average, I need a substantial amount of material.”
“That’s so cool!” Patton said eagerly, placing his fifteen dollars on the desk. “Oh wow, you must know everything about everything! Oh, did you ever read the uh… The Annotated Mal—the uh… the book I was borrowing?”
Logan checked the handful of bills and began methodically sorting them away. “‘An Annotated Look at Malleus Maleficarum and Ancient Demonology’. Yes, I have. A rather odd, but fascinating book. While the original was a historical treatise by the Catholics on the need to exterminate witches, this annotated edition spends far more time comparing the outdated claims to knowledge on the practices of historical witches. It is a fascinating look into a rather brutal conflict between contrary systems of faith.”
“Did you read the part about the demons? The drawings in that part were so spooky!” Patton said eagerly.
Logan nodded, sliding the desk drawer shut and turning his attention back to Patton. “I did. There is no reason for you to be put off by the book, though. Although fascinating, the concept of Hell and demons is scientifically improbable.”
‘You’re scientifically improbable,’ Deceit hissed.
“Oh, well, you never know!” Patton said.
Logan tilted his head to the side. “Ah, my mistake. Sometimes I forget to be more delicate with matters that have religious ties. I have been told I can be rather blunt and rude. Have I offended you?”
“No, no!” Patton said, waving his arms in front of himself. “Uh, I just think anything could be out there! Like space, who knows whats in space!”
Logan crossed his arms over the desk, lost in thought. “Space demons? I mean—no. Although there are many unknowns, stories of demons depend on their interactions with human beings. There should be a high concentration of reports on demonic sightings, or some measurable evidence. Our knowledge of demons is based purely off of folktales and, if one partakes in it, religious belief. Personally, I find the odds infinitesimal.”
‘His head is infinitesimal.’
“Please be nice,” Patton pleaded.
Logan raised his eyebrows curiously. “Ah, I’m sorry, did I say something rude after all? I by no means am trying to offend, only to have a simple debate.”
“No! You didn’t, uh, hmm.” Patton bit his lip, feeling a bit off balance as he tried to make up an excuse. “I mean, if demons do exist, imagine how they would feel! If your whole thing is stealing souls and having scary horns and wings, people would probably try to attack you! So they’d probably hide any time they were around people, like disguises. If you were a demon, wouldn’t you hide too?”
Logan shook his head. “Absolutely not. I would immediately seek out a component scientist and turn myself over for study,” he said, sounding surprisingly enthused. “I would gladly do anything for the sake of further scientific advancement and the collective knowledge of humankind. It is what I live for.”
‘Well that’s just perfectly ordinary.’
“Hey, uh, Logan!” Patton said, leaning on the desk. “You seem really smart and cool and I wanna hang out with you and stuff! Would you, uh, wanna go to a movie some time?”
Logan looked at Patton quizzically. “Truth be told I do not have many close acquaintances here. I am going to have to turn you down.”
Patton wilted. “Oh. That’s okay,” he said, forcing a smile, trying to stay cheerful. “No hard feelings.”
He put a hand over his pocket, and the feeling of Deceit’s coils gave him some small comfort. ‘Whatever, that stuck-up nerd probably isn’t good enough for you anyway. Don’t worry about him. The deal was that we find friends that you like and they like you. If he’s going to be an asshole, then we find someone else.”
“Thank you,” Patton said softly, bowing his head as he turned to leave.
Logan pulled out his phone, tapping his chin. “I am available this Saturday. Is that reasonable for you?”
Patton stopped in his tracks. “Wait, wait. What?”
Logan lowered his phone, tilting his head to the side. “Saturday. I was under the impression that you wanted to meet up and ‘hang out.’ Is that not a good time for you?”
“But you said you were going to turn me down?” Patton said, bunching his eyebrows up. “I don’t get it. Is this a prank?”
“I turned you down for a movie. Most are silly fictional stories and I find them utterly uninteresting. I would be willing to go for a coffee, or perhaps to visit a museum if you find that agreeable. As I said, I do not currently have many close acquaintances.”
‘How is this man worse at social cues than you are?’ Deceit said in disbelief.
Patton lit up, holding his hands close to his chest and resisting the urge to bounce up and down. He had a friend! Or at least, a potential friend. He hadn’t hung out with anyone for fun since high school. “That sounds great! The natural history museum has a lot of cool interactive exhibits with fun videos and little models of stuff,” he said eagerly. “And they have a cafe, so we could do coffee too!”
“That sounds perfectly serviceable,” Logan said, typing on his phone. “We can meet at the museum. I keep a rather strict schedule, so I’d like to know what times to put in my calendar.”
“Does three work for you?” Patton said eagerly.
Logan nodded, showing Patton the calendar open on his phone. “I’m available then. You are an incredibly odd man, but I believe this will be a mutually enjoyable ‘chill sesh.’ Did I say that correctly?”
“I think so,” Patton said.
‘Ah. So you’re both idiots,’ Deceit said drily. ‘Congratulations Patton, you deserve each other.’
“I’ll be looking forward to it. For now though, I must ask that you leave me be. I am still on working hours, and I’m expecting a phone call about a shipment of new children’s books.” Logan grabbed a sticky note and a pen, scribbling down his name and phone number. “Should any issues come up regarding our weekend meeting, you may contact me.”
“Thanks Logan!” Patton said brightly, taking the sticky note and holding it tightly. “I can’t wait, see you this weekend!” He turned and walked back out the library doors, resisting the urge to skip down the steps. The city felt particularly sunny and warm today, and he couldn’t help humming a cheery nonsense tune. There was still the chance things might not work out and he and Logan wouldn’t be friends after all, but Patton tried not to think about that.
He turned down a small empty side-street, scooping Deceit out of his pocket. “Dee, did you hear that? Oh man! I don’t remember making friends being so scary!” he said eagerly. “We’re gonna hang out! Can you believe it?”
In a ripple of scales and a shimmer of light, the corn snake slipped from his palm, taking the form of Deceit. For a brief moment his hand was resting over Patton’s, though he quickly pulled it away.
“Honestly I’m shocked that didn’t end with the library in flames,” Deceit mused. He looked slightly different from before—his suit was gone in favor of a more business-casual attire and his horns had vanished beneath the dark curls of his hair. In the sunlight, there seemed to be ripples of white across his golden scales. “It certainly could have gone worse. Though it could have gone better too.”
Patton laughed, grinning brightly. “I’m gonna hang out with him, like friends do! That’s pretty great in my book.” He paused, the concern melting back in. How was he going to win over someone as smart and cool as Logan? “You’ll come with to the museum, right? I don’t want to do anything wrong and make him change his mind!”
Deceit shrugged, tilting back his hat. “If that’s what it takes to fulfill your pact I can’t really say no, can I now?”
“So you’ll come?” Patton asked hopefully.
Deceit leaned against the building wall and smirked. “I suppose I will, yes.”
Patton smiled, reaching out and taking Deceit’s hand, holding it between both of his. “Great! I was really scared, but this was a lot of fun! Oh!” He pulled back, glancing at his phone. “It’s getting late, I should probably get home so I can start making dinner. Are you going home for the night?”
Deceit paused, his expression shifting into something Patton couldn’t quite read. “If you have no more need of my services for the day, yes, I can go back to hell,” he said, his voice clipped and cold.
“Well, I don’t have anything else I need your help with, but if you want you can join me for dinner? I’m going to make a spaghetti casserole!”
Deceit narrowed his eyes. “If this is some attempt to escape the deal by poisoning me, I can guarantee you will suffer for it.”
“No, no!” Patton said, clearly horrified by the idea. “Why would I do that? You’re helping me, just like I wanted!” He paused, his enthusiasm slipping a bit. “I’m sorry. You don’t have to stay for dinner, I just thought it might be nice.”
Deceit stood up, tilting his hat down. “You truly are a bizarre human being,” he muttered. “I will follow you home, and while you eat, we will discuss strategies to fulfill the contract. I will not eat, and I will not stay longer than necessary. Is this clear?”
Patton nodded, feeling as though maybe he’d touched on a nerve. It was tempting to ask, and while he had a habit of being a busybody, he figured it wasn’t the smartest idea to bug a demon for personal details. “Your loss,” he said, smiling to try and ease the tension. “I make a mean casserole!” He turned and started walking down the sidewalk, back towards his department.
Deceit followed behind him, keeping his head down so passersby wouldn’t notice the scales marking his cheek. He glanced up now and then, eyes on Patton’s back. There was a strange feeling, one that the demon could not quite place. It was a warmth—not the fire of anger or the heat of jealousy—it was like a gentle ray of sunlight. He pushed the feeling down, gritting his teeth. Thinking too much on the feeling would distract him from his purpose. He was here to claim a soul for damnation, not to worry over the gentle burning in his chest.
He would not let this human get under his skin so easily.