Chapter Text
NotAWolf- Tony, tell your kids that Loki is not a pet
Tincan- He’s not? Damn, now I have to cancel that custom collar order
Captain- Please tell me you didn’t actually get a god a collar
Tincan- Why do you think I had to custom order one? He’d never accept a basic, store bought one
NotAWolf- He says if you cancel that order, he’s taking the kids to space again
Tincan- Tell him to calm down, artist says it’s almost ready to be shipped
RedSpy- You actually ordered him a collar?
Tincan- He wanted one, and I have lots of money. Happy God of Mischief, happy life
Falcon- Makes sense to me
HawkGuy- Is this a kink thing?
Tincan- Nah, it’s more of a physical reassurance that we want him around and care about his needs
Captain- Why’re you calling him a him?
Smallboi- It’s a he/him day for Loki, we ask every morning and use the pronouns he tells us
Scarlet- Why can’t he just pick one?
Lesbihonest- Because that’s not how gender fluid works?
OnlyTenISee- Because he’s forever changing, and feels no need to conform to Earth gender norms?
Richboi- Because he can slay any gendered or non gendered look he wants to, and likes having his identity affirmed by his family?
Hacker- Because Loki is a higher being than you, and has no need for your heteronormativity? Or cis bs?
Smallboi- Because I can witch -Loki
Tincan- Alright children, go play with Loki, you can open people’s minds later
Smallboi- Bye dad!
HawkGuy- How’re you so good with that horde of kids?
NotAWizard- They’re basically the child versions of him and his friends, he relates too much
Tincan- That’s not true
NotAWizard- R disagrees
Tincan- R can suck a papaya
NotAWizard- Using people’s allergies against them is rude Anthony
Tincan- Who the fuck is Anthony?
NotAWizard- You.
Tincan- Nope, that name has been buried. Say or type it ever again, and I’m locking you out of the tower
NotAWizard- I can teleport anywhere I like. Try me, Anthony.
Falcon- Please no foreplay in the chat
Smallboi- I second this
NotAWizard- Peter, want me to tell P about all of the webbing you decided to leave hanging in the very expensive light fixture she picked out?
Smallboi- Bye Mr. Strange Dr. Wizard sir!
Tincan- Why does he listen to you more than me?
NotAWizard- I have better threats
Tincan- I can sick P on him too!
NotAWizard- No you can’t. You’re both too scared of her, and always have work to catch up on, so you avoid her as much as possible to avoid said work
NotAWolf- Can one of you come get your son off the ceiling?
NotAWizard- Please tell me it’s Peter
NotAWolf- Nope, it’s Harry
NotAWizard- Webbed or hanging from a light?
NotAWolf- Chandelier in the dining room
NotAWizard- Damn, can Loki get him?
NotAWolf- MJ’s braiding his hair, he refuses to move until it’s done
NotAWizard- Fine, on my way
HawkGuy- Why are your children so feral?
Tincan- Why not?
Captain- Why is Harry on a chandelier?
Smallboi- He was singing that song about partying and sex, so he had to swing on a chandelier to get the full effect
RedSpy- Had to?
Richboi- Had to.