Chapter Text
Wandas POV
As I stepped out onto the long vibrant green grass I felt at peace, due to the birds, the trees that surrounded the farm like a force field. Everything was so secluded and private. The boy and girl who I gathered to be Lila and Cooper looked ecstatic, this must be Clints family. Lila looked to be around 8 and Cooper around 11 and he appeared to be holding a piece of paper in his hand. “Look dad I made you a picture” Cooper yelled with excitement. They were both so entranced with Clint, that was until they noticed Natasha and I standing behind him. At once I could feel everyone’s eyes landing on me, examining me. It made me feel uneasy, Natasha seemed to pick up on this and introduced me. “This is Wanda, she’ll be living with us from now on”. This was a shock to me I thought I was just visiting the farm and that I’d be going back to the compound to train with Steve. But no. This is all happening too fast, overwhelmed I look over to Natasha for an explanation but she just shakes her head and tells me we’ll talk later. It isn’t fair, everyone’s making decisions about my life and I have no say. When it was just me and Pietro we could do whatever we pleased but now I feel trapped by grown ups trying to control me. I’m knocked out of my thoughts by a strong pair of arms wrapping around me and pulling me into a hug. Scared I look up to see the woman who must be Laura beaming down at me. The embrace didn’t last long but I kind of wish it did. Laura smelt nice and the hug was more comforting than I wanted to admit. She releases me, taking me by the hand we walk to the big farmhouse at the end of the drive.
Once inside, Natasha showed me to the room that I’d be staying in and I unpacked the small amount of possessions I actually have, the outfits Clint had brought me, a couple of books and the box of Pietros clothes from the battle. As I unpack Pietros hoodie I can’t help but stare in horror at the bullet holes that still pierce it, a visual reminder of what my stupid decisions did to my brother. The emotions become too much but I try to shove it all down and keep up the image that I’m okay. If they see how broken I truly am, they’ll throw me out and although I don’t really want to be here, I don’t have anywhere else to go. I could always go back to the streets but being homeless was hard enough with Pietro never mind on my own. I thought I was doing a good job of concealing my emotions but of course the literal spy wasn’t convinced. As if she could read my mind she stated “you know we aren’t going to get rid of you, this family we are a team and like it or not your now part of it. Now I’m not saying it’s going to be easy because it’s not. It’ll take some time for you to get used to and we’ll all be patient but in the end I think you’ll be happy with us”. To say I was shocked would be an understatement, could Natasha and the rest of this so called family really want me here? The thought made me surprisingly happy because its all I’ve wanted since my parents died, although part of me feels guilty that I’m here with this new family and Pietros not. Could I really move on and have a new brother and sister while he lay cold six feet under. The idea made her stomach squirm and before i could stop myself i was sprinting to the bathroom
across the hall, just in time to hurl my guts out.
uggghh my heads spinning and I can’t breathe. Every time I blink I see Pietros dead corpse lying there motionless, and guilt fills up inside me ready to overflow. everything is blurry and I think I’m going to throw up again. As I throw up I feel a hand on my shoulder and within seconds my hair is being tied up and I’m being told to breathe. I’ve never experienced anything like this before and it’s scary. When the room finally stops spinning and I feel myself physically calm. Natasha picks me up and carry’s me into my new bedroom placing me on the bed. I went to complain but I was stopped by the warning glare of the black widow. This was it I’d found the breaking point and I was as good as gone. But instead of scolding me, Natasha just sighed before asking me if I knew what just happened. I honestly didn’t and debated lying so I didn’t seem as clueless but I really was confused. So I shook my head no, and Natasha sighed before telling me that “Wanda that was a panic attack, everyone experiences them in different ways, you clearly throw up and that’s okay. Due to our trauma every single one of the avengers deals with them so your not alone. It’s your body’s fight or flight response to a scary situation. But what got you so upset and stressed? I was really touched by how nice Natasha was being and I really wanted to talk to her about it but I couldn’t. I couldn’t form the right words to express how much I miss Pietro so I shook my head saying that I didn’t want to talk about it. By the look on her face Natasha seemed to somehow know what was bothering me but she chose not to say anything, which I was really greatful of. Instead she just climbed onto the side of my bed held me and we lay there without saying a word. I knew I’d regret it in the morning but I adored the feeling of comfort it brought me. Eventually Natasha broke the silence by telling me we’d talk about everything including the ground rules tomorrow but for now I had to go to bed. So she held me until my eyes started to close and I drifted off to sleep.