Chapter Text
Yamaguchi did, in fact, not text Kei later.
Of course, Tsukishima checked this to make sure. Checked once, twice, every hour flicking the screen on, and every few minutes biting his lips and chewing as he glanced at his phone screen desperately waiting for the flash of an incoming message. Nothing came.
He wasn't quite sure why he was so desperate for a text, the last one he saw being a message from yesterday night informing Tsukishima that Tadashi had got home safely, his little emojis sprinkling the screen. He hadn't responded, it so late that Kei was passed out by the time the brunette had finally messaged him that night. Kei thought right about now he'd stay up as long as Tadashi wanted if it meant finally getting that bright ding and green popup.
Maybe he was desperate because the whole thing had ended off on a horrible note to begin with, a confirmation that Tadashi wasn't so upset with him to ignore him, a "today was horrible, but tomorrow will be better if you play your cards right". With no text, there was no confirmation, and considering the time...
Kei glanced at the clock above his desk, eyes burning as he squinted. His heart clenched tight in his chest at the affirmation that yes, it was indeed 11'o'clock at night with no sign that Yamaguchi remembered the promise to text him. Tadashi was well and truly pissed at him.
Frustration with Yamaguchi was expressionful, and every time the brunette became frustrated, either with Kei's self-pity or with something simple as a serve he couldn't do, he expressed it with ease. He would shake Kei, scream sometimes, or he would work himself to death trying his best to perfect something that dared to try and dance out of his reach. But anger was different, somehow. If frustration welled up fast and was released in a burst of energy then anger was a slow burn over many weeks to months, and once Tadashi snapped it was silent.
He had to be pissed, Kei had to have done something wrong to warrant such treatment, but he wasn't sure what. Was his cold shoulder to Hinata that morning really the last straw? What else built up to this moment? And how could he fix it? If he asked Tadashi he was sure that would make the brunette more furious, so that was off the table entirely.
What could he do, then?
Tsukishima groaned, loud and clear as he rolled over and shoved his face into his pillow. He gripped tight to the sides of the pillow, pressing it tight to his ears as if hoping it would silence his thoughts. He felt like Kuroo, at that moment, laying flat on his stomach with hands pressed at the sides of his head in hopes to silence the world.
Kei wasn't entirely sure how this helped the older male sleep, especially since his heart lurched at the very clear dinging sound of his phone. Tsukishima sprung up, flinging himself onto his back to scoop his phone up from where it lay on his desk next to his bed, yanking it from its charger without thought.
The tight feeling in his chest unraveled, throat closing up as he gazed over the grinning face of Bokuto Koutaro's profile picture.
Annoying Owl (23:12)
- I FORGOT TO ASK!!! hoOW IS CONFESSING TO 12 GOING?
Kei tossed his phone back onto his desk, the grating sound of it skidding across the wooden surface setting his ears on fire. He rolled onto his side, back to the phone illuminating his ceiling as he roughly tugged a blanket over his body.
Exhausted, he didn't bother to change out of his school clothes, to take off his glasses, or move to grab the phone again when it continued to light up his ceiling. He squeezed his eyes shut tight, curling up under his covers.
Despite fatigue, he couldn't find it in himself to fall asleep until the phone stopped lighting up for good and it was well past midnight.
Saturday Morning.
Or as close to it as Kei could get, at least. He awoke, drowsy, uncomfortable, and feeling gross. When he managed to finally work enough strength into his bones he pushed himself up, eyes burning as he reached up to rub and itch at them furiously. He readjusted his glasses when finished, feeling their indentations in the side of his face as he threw his legs off the side of his bed.
He stood, wobbling as he looked down at his wrinkled clothes before his eyes then shot towards his phone on his desk, still unplugged from the night before. He grabbed for it easily, flicking it on desperately as his stomach twisted itself into knots.
Please.
Annoying Owl (23:26)
- 5 New Messages
Annoying Cat (23:31)
- 3 New Messages
The King (08:33)
- We should talk.
Kei tossed his phone back onto his desk without bothering to open it, turning away to begin stripping himself of his clothes. He glanced at the clock, swallowing down the urge to scream as he realized it was well past 10'o'clock in the morning.
He hardly ever slept that late, especially since starting volleyball.
Shaking off the feeling of fear and disappointment, Kei made quick work of grabbing pajamas to slip into. Once changed, he glanced back at his phone again, resisting the urge to grab and check it once more just in case he had misread the notifications.
He forced himself to walk away, heading for his bedroom door and wrenching it open. One step, two steps, he was outside, and the door was shut behind him. Kei's stomach lurched at the sound of the latch clicking.
He could do this, he didn't need Yamaguchi. He was fine without him. Tadashi was sure to text sooner or later, anyway. It had only been around a day, after all.
Tsukishima Kei was completely calm.
Saturday Afternoon.
On, off, on off, on... off. Click, snap, click, snap.
Kei repeatedly flicked his phone on and off, staring at the screen with his glasses pushed up his face and digging into his forehead. His laptop hummed, playing videos he could care less about watching even with it perched precariously on his lap as he lay on his bed.
On, off. Nothing, absolutely nothing.
Was this obsession? Insanity? Torture? Click, snap. He was waiting for a text, a text Kei wasn't even sure would come along, repeatedly turning his phone on, click, off.
Was he doing this as if Tadashi would message him sooner the more he did it? Click, click, click.
Kei squeezed his eyes shut tight, dropping his phone on his chest as one hand came up to pinch at the bridge of his nose tight. Stupid. That's what it was, not an obsession, a breach of insanity, or even some form of torture, it was just fucking stupid.
Tsukishima groaned, loud and clear, pushing his phone off his chest and smacking the spacebar key on his laptop to stop the incessant noise flittering about the room. Why was he waiting for Tadashi to say something when he clearly wanted nothing to do with Kei? Was he an idiot? How dumb did he have to be to keep sitting around waiting for something to happen when he knew deep down it wouldn't?
His fingers itched, twitched with the need to tear, to scream and punch, something to get rid of all of the excess energy laying underneath his skin. He instead forced himself to close his laptop, calmly for fear of cracking the frame holding it together, setting it aside on his desk and rolling over on his side.
Quietly, seething, he reached around himself to pick up his phone again.
On, no messages, off again.
Fuck this.
Saturday Night.
Kei ate his dinner quickly that night, silently nodding along to any of his mother's questions and brushing off his apparent moodiness as exhaustion. As soon as it was over he padded up the stairs as fast as possible, ducking into his bedroom. When the door fell shut behind him he leaned back up against it, flicking his phone out of his pants pocket and clicking it on in a fluid motion.
Blank. Empty. Tsukishima stared, long enough that the screen went dark again without him so much as reaching for the button.
Pleadingly, he pressed himself back against his wooden door harder, heels sliding against the carpeted floor and digging in. Click, the phone flashed again, but it was still empty.
Kei swallowed, thick in his throat, and pressed the phone to his forehead as he clicked it off. More than a day had gone by since he and Yamaguchi had last spoken, almost two days of cold shoulders and terse words.
Maybe he did need the other boy, after all. Maybe he should've reached out yesterday when the opportunity was there, ask if the pinch server got home safe, apologize for not answering his questions, get it all over with.
Was it too late to do that?
Ding! Kei jolted, head flinging up as he shoved himself back against his bedroom door again, having begun to slouch while stewing in his pessimistic thoughts.
He pushed his glasses up as his phone dropped down back to eye-level, the middle blocker eagerly scanning over the new notification with bated breath.
Akaashi Keiji (19:23)
- Could you please reply to Bokuto and Kuroo's messages? Th...
Tsukishima threw his phone at his bed before slamming himself against the door and sinking to the floor, arms curled around his knees.
Of course.
Sunday Morning.
Somehow in the middle of his frustrated pity party, Kei managed to drag himself up to lay in bed and fall asleep, phone resting beside his head on his pillow. By the time the sun rose Kei was already awake, still laying on his side and staring at the black case of his smartphone, willing it to go off.
In and out of sleep all night, he was still exhausted, and his bones felt heavier than ever before. He didn't want to move, he was tired, but he knew he needed to.
The idea that he needed to get up, to move around and do things, it was overwhelming, making him feel that much heavier even as he forcibly pushed himself up.
He hunched over in his bed, staring at the blank wall in front of him before carefully grabbing his phone and shoving it in the pocket of his pajamas without so much as checking it. It hadn't gone off all night, he would've heard it if it had.
There was no point in checking it.
Slowly, Kei swung himself out of bed, trudging across his room and feeling as if he was out of his own body even as he moved. He stopped once he reached the door, standing there for a few moments just waiting.
Maybe... maybe now?
Silence followed, and with a deep breath Kei forced himself to grab the door handle, turning until it clicked open. With a tug it was free, and Tsukishima squeezed his eyes tight. Breath, in, out.
He stepped through, not feeling the slightest bit prepared to leave the cold bedroom he had woken up in but letting the door fall shut behind him none the less.
Phone heavy in his pocket, Kei started the short, faraway treck to the staircase leading downstairs.
Sunday Afternoon.
Ding!
Kei didn't bother to reach for his phone, instead craning his head from his spot on the couch to stare at the lit-up screen.
Shortie (15:48)
- can you reply to bakeyamayamas mssges yet?? he's gett...
Tsukishima rolled over, going back to staring at the book clutched in his grasp, the effort to read it making his temples ache. Any progress it looked like he had made was wasted, as he was so unfocused the words read didn't seem to register. He couldn't remember the last thing that truly happened in the book, eyes glazed as they stared at the word "lonely", the sound of it rolling around continuously in his mind.
Ding!
Kei twitched, blinking a few times as he tilted his head back to glance at the screen again.
Shortie (15:49)
- CMON ANSWER ME.
With a grunt, Kei rolled back tighter in on himself and went searching for the word "lonely" again.
Ding!
Tsukishima's grip tightened on the book, the crinkle of pages audible.
Ding!
He forced himself to sit up, book snapping shut as he rolled on his hips to stare at his phone incredulously. Ding! Another popup appeared, Hinata's messages now compiled together.
Ding!
Shortie (15:52)
- 5 New Messages
Ding!
Shortie (15:53)
- 6 New Messages
Kei growled, tossing his book down on the couch as he leaned over, snatching up his phone with a click of his teeth.
Angrily, he swiped across the screen, the lock flicking open with a few press of buttons. Hinata's messages filled his screen, and with another ding Tsukishima felt his teeth gnash together.
Shortie
(15:48) - can you reply to bakeyamayamas mssges yet?? he's getting suuuiper annoying ab it!!
(15:49) - CMON ANSWER ME.
(15:49) - h e l l oooooo?
(15:50) - uuuugh you and bakageyama and so ANNOyinG
(15:52) - SALTY BOI ANSWER ME
(15:53) - HELLOOOOOOOO?
You
(15:54) - Could you please shut up?
Shortie
(15:54) - YOURE ALIVE!!!! good now can you answre kags pLEASE he's so annoying oh my god
You
(15:54) - Shut up.
Kei clicked his phone off, letting it clatter to the coffee table as he flopped back against the couch and groaned. Rubbing his hands across his face and digging his palms into his eyes, the middle blocker sighed.
His head pounded, his eyes ached, he was tired.
The last thing he needed was Hinata bugging him because Kageyama was complaining for whatever reason.
Ding!
Kei screamed.
Sunday Night.
After finally managing to get Hinata to stop texting him, replying to Kageyama denying his "offer" (if it could even be called that) to talk, and apologizing to Akaashi for not handling the manchildren duo of Bokuto and Kuroo sooner, Kei sighed.
His headache seemed to have faded somewhat since that afternoon, but the longer he stared at his phone screen the more dread built up in his stomach. He wished he didn't have to resort to this.
Asking for their help again , the second time in less than a month, was excruciating enough, but he could practically feel the laughter at his incompetence coming a mile away.
With a deep sigh of regret, Kei gently plucked his phone up, staring at the screen for a few desperate moments longer, hoping anyone would come to interrupt him. Hoping he in particular would finally message him, stop him before he dared open the next can of worms.
No one heeded his call, and Kei typed in the two names he wished he didn't have to see pop up on screen.
Annoying Cat, Annoying Owl, You
Sunday, Dec 15, 20:43.
Annoying Owl
(20:44) - OYA?
Annoying Cat
(20:44) - Oya oya?
Annoying Owl has named this conversation OYA OYA OYA!
You
(20:45) - This was a mistake. Nevermind.
Annoying Cat
(20:46) - Now now, tsukki, c'mon and tell your lovely senpai's why you made this little group chat ((ΦωΦ))
Annoying Owl
(20:46) - WAIT I CAN DO THAT TOO
(20:47) - （ꉺ▿ꉺ）
(20:47) - (ؔᶿ̷⌔ؔᶿ̷)
(20:47) - ლ(ʘ▽ʘ)ლ
You
(20:47) - As riveting as you sending kaomoji's is, I did make this group chat for a reason...
Annoying Cat
(20:48) - SO TELL US
(20:48) - ٩(ↀДↀ)۶
Kei slumped, the back of his head thunking against the headboard as he took a deep breath. Slowly, he pushed himself up again, hunching over the screen and tapping across its keys.
You
(20:51) - You two both asked how my whole "confession thing" was going with Yamaguchi. Evidently... I think I've messed up. I decided to work up to confessing to him by leaving him notes and it went well for the past week. Friday, though, he didn't read the note I left him and he's been giving me a cold shoulder since then. We haven't talked at all since our walk home Friday.
Annoying Owl
(20:52) - WHAT
(20:52) - sorry i mean, what????
Annoying Cat
(20:52) - (ↀДↀ)✧
(20:53) - Why did he stop talking to you so suddenly??
You
(20:53) - I'm not sure. I just know he's mad at me.
Annoying Owl
(20:53) - why are you s sure of tat??
You
(20:54) - Even when angry at me, Yamaguchi will usually talk to me or try to be around me. He avoided me the majority of Friday and only talked to me a few times sporadically.
Annoying Cat
(20:55) - Oh you f uc k e d u p
(20:55) - Did you text him to apologize??
You
(20:55) - No.
Annoying Cat
(20:55) - WHY NOT OHNMY GOD
(20:56) - ٩(ↀДↀ)۶ Number one rule of talking to boys you like, Tsukki-kun, you always try to apologize if you fuck up!!!!!
You
(20:56) - Thanks, I definitely haven't been beating myself up for that this weekend. Why do you think I'm texting you guys?
Annoying Owl
(20:57) - he hasa point Ttetsubro
(20:58) - well, while it would've been better to apologize sooner if you figure out why he was mad at you or how you messed up you can apologize to him in person tomorrow, which... reallly is eve n better than if you had done it over ttext without thinkingd abot what you did wrong!! (´Ο∇Ο)
Annoying Cat
(20:58) - Omg bro you're a genius
(20:59) - And talk surprisingly well when you actually think about your responses
Annoying Owl
(21:00) - owl bite yoy
(21:00) - you***
You
(21:01) - That wasn't even the most egregious spelling mistake you have made tonight... but that's the one you decided to correct?
(21:01) - But... you may be right. I'm just not sure what I did wrong.
(21:01) - And if I apologize tomorrow without knowing what I did wrong that'll be much worse than if I simply apologized right away without knowing what I did wrong.
Annoying Owl
(21:02) - FUCK YOU'RE RIGHT
(21:02) - TETSSUUUU WHAT DO WE DO???? (⁰▿⁰三⁰▿⁰ ‧̣̥̇)
Annoying Cat
(21:04) - I don't think you guys will like my idea...（三ФÅФ三）
You
(21:04) - Try me. Bokuto doesn't have any more ideas and I'm out of options, anything you suggest is better than nothing.
Annoying Cat
(21:05) - Alright... you askedddd
(21:06) - What if you... I dunno
(21:06) - Just confess?
Kei froze, staring at his phone and blinking as if the message would change the longer he looked at it. He had to have been misreading, right? There was no way after everything Kei had said that Kuroo could seriously think that confessing to Tadashi would be the solution, right?
Annoying Owl
(21:07) - ತ ⌔̫ ತ
Annoying Cat
(21:07) - (=ΦｴΦ=)???
Annoying Owl
(21:08) - BRO WHOW WOULD THAT HELP AT ALL????
(21:08) - THATS A HORRIBLE IDEA!!!!
Annoying Cat
(21:08) - I SAID YOU GUYS WOULDN'T LIKE IT.
Kei sighed, running a hand through his hair. He was going to regret his next choice, he was sure, but... did he didn't have many options like he said. With resignation, the blond slowly began to fiddle with his phone once more.
You
(21:09) - Explain.
Annoying Cat
(21:09) - Huh??
You
(21:10) - I want to hear your explanation and reasons for why you think I should confess to Yamaguchi.
Annoying Cat
(21:10) - （ФоФ)
Annoying Owl
(21:11) - ⊚▿⊚
(21:11) - TSUKKKI ARE YOU SEIRIOUS??
You
(21:11) - Yes.
Annoying Cat
(21:12) - Well well well
(21:12) - (=ↀωↀ=)
(21:12) - Looks like I'm the superior senpai here today!
Kei watched as his phone filled up with messages of Kuroo and Bokuto arguing over their "senpai-status" as they called it, zoning out as message after message appeared on his screen. With another sigh, Tsukishima looked out at the window of his bedroom at the glowing moon and shining stars that lay just outside.
Maybe he could remedy everything, after all.
He just needed to try.