Chapter Text
*
“So? What do you say?” Soyeon asked with a smile.
Soojin considered it, really considered it, for a minute. But she couldn’t. No matter how much she loved Soyeon, there was so much she would leave behind.
“You know I can’t.” she said. “I’ve got Yejin and my dad and...”
“Shuhua”.
Soojin looked back at Soyeon with sad eyes, but the other just gave her a one-sided smile and a nod, before falling down against her chest. Soojin held her tightly.
“When everything falls apart, I will still be yours.” she quoted.
She remembered the lyrics, from the first song on the playlist Soyeon gave her many years ago now. It was a beautiful song, and every single word was true.
Soyeon smiled and squeezed her a little tighter.
“Don’t go Soyeon.” Soojin said.
She knew she was selfish with her wish. She knew Soyeon wouldn’t benefit from it in any way. But she just couldn’t let her go. She lived for Soyeon, after all.
The song writer kissed her forehead, before she felt herself disappeared into her unconsciousness.
When she woke up the next morning, she already knew Soyeon would be gone.
But she got up, as usual. Got dressed, as usual. Painted her lips in red, as usual. Before exiting the house.
Her legs were already shaking when she walked down the street, but it was like she was working on autopilot. She couldn’t stop, neither did she want to.
It wasn’t until she was outside the house that she got back to her senses. But she still knocked, and watched as the young Taiwanese opened the door.
She’d just woken up, Soojin could see on her puffy face. She looked cute.
*
*
*
When Minnie woke up, she couldn’t feel her arm. It was obtained, stolen, by a certain Korean she happened to love.
She remembered how she’d fallen asleep sulking, alone in her bed. How Miyeon got here, she’d never know. But now that she was here, Minnie was glad she knew how to sneak in.
Since she couldn’t move her arm, that wasn’t hers anymore, she moved closer instead. She intertwined their legs by putting Miyeon’s between her own, and placed her free arm over the girl’s belly, as she buried her head in the older’s mass of hair.
After a while, when Minnie got bored, she started drawing circles in the older’s belly. Then she started shaking the other body, until she started lightly hitting it. Not enough to hurt, of course.
Miyeon could sleep through an earthquake, so Minnie wasn’t surprised when she didn’t wake up. Instead, she brought her hand up to the older’s face and started outlining her beautiful features.
She was so perfect, and Minnie was so jealous of everything she was. Her personality, her looks. But she was reassured when she remembered that everyone was jealous of her, because she had all of that.
After several minutes of drawing on the older’s face, she started to move, to get away from Minnie’s fingers.
“You’re awake!” the younger squealed and held her tightly.
“Too loud.” Miyeon muttered.
“Sorry.” Minnie whispered and started plastering kisses along her neck.
The younger carefully moved up to kiss her face. She placed light kisses all along her forehead, over her nose and to her cheeks. The older had yet to open her eyes, but Minnie knew she wasn’t a morning person so that would have to take its time.
The Thai fought for her arm back, which she got when Miyeon quickly lifted her head, and she felt the blood starting to flow again.
After some waiting, she was able to balance her body on it as she hovered above Miyeon. She just stared down without moving at all.
“You’re so beautiful that I think I’m gonna cry.” she said.
The older smiled before pouting her lips, to which Minnie got the message and leaned down to press their lips together. It was just lazy kisses, and Miyeon barely kissed her back, but she enjoyed them anyway. It was still her girlfriend’s lips pressed between her own.
Soon enough, Miyeon’s lips started moving against Minnie’s. The younger smiled before pressing her tongue forward, to which the older pulled away.
“I’m gonna go shower.” she said.
Now she just wanted Minnie to suffer.
The younger’s mouth fell. But Miyeon kept a smirk on her lips when she opened her eyes. She looked to the side, where Minnie was completely frozen with a frown. The older chuckled before standing up.
She started walking towards the bathroom, before she turned around and raised an eyebrow.
“Are you gonna join me?”
Minnie’s eyes grew.
“Me?” she asked.
“Who else?”
Minnie was quick to stand up. So much quicker than she ever was to do anything else. She almost fell as she tangled herself out of the covers, and then followed Miyeon like an obedient puppy.
The older grabbed both their toothbrushes, and gave Minnie hers.
“I’m not gonna share morning breaths with you.” Miyeon said, and put toothpaste on their brushes.
After two minutes, or a lot less but that’s besides the point, Miyeon turned to Minnie, who waited for whatever her command was.
“Don’t be scared.” the Korean said and took a step closer. “Just touch me.”
“Are you sure you’re ready?” the younger asked.
Miyeon pulled her in for a deep kiss, before smiling.
“I’m ready.” she said.
“You’re not gonna make me stop now, are you?” Minnie questioned, just to be sure.
“No.” Miyeon placed her hand on Minnie’s cheek. “I’m all yours.”
The younger smiled before pulling Miyeon towards herself. She caught her lips again, and smiled when they danced with each other. Minnie decided to try with her tongue again, and this time, Miyeon opened up her cave to let her in. Their softness met each other, and the older let out a muffled sound of pleasure.
Minnie smiled, before softly pushing her towards the sink. Miyeon’s hands found their way to the younger’s neck, while Minnie started playing with the hem of the older’s tank top.
They broke apart so Minnie could lift the clothing up. Miyeon, who’d been so confident before, was blushing under Minnie’s gaze. But the younger just smiled at her, before taking her lips again.
Minnie’s hands gripped Miyeon’s sides, as she lowered herself to her knees. She kissed every part of the Korean’s front that she could reach, before leaving a little mark on her lower belly. Minnie knew Miyeon would scold her for it later, but she couldn’t really care right now.
She listened to Miyeon’s quiet sighs as she started pulling down the pyjama pants that originally were Minnie’s, and Miyeon blushed once again as every piece of fabric had left her body.
The younger was quick to reassure her with kisses, before she undressed herself, and quickly pressed their bodies together in a passionate kiss.
Miyeon wasn’t sure if it was because she too felt self aware under her girlfriend’s gaze, or if it just was because of pure desire. But she couldn’t complain when she had Minnie’s skin all over her.
Soon, the younger started pulling them to the shower. She didn’t break the kiss all way there, not even when she put on the water.
Minnie’s hands started roaming around her back, so Miyeon knew it was time for her to grab onto something. Anything. The closest was the crane, which she grabbed in a hard grip.
The younger’s lips left hers as they found their way back to Miyeon’s neck. Not even a second later she lowered them down to Miyeon’s chest, and started trailing kisses there too. The older moaned, and Minnie smiled before she grabbed the soap on her side.
She swayed her soapy hands over Miyeon’s arms, her neck, down to her chest. She stayed at the chest a little longer than any other part, before continuing down to her stomach, to her hips and further down to her legs. The older moaned again when Minnie touched the insides of her thighs.
Then she was turned around, and touched from the back of her neck, over her back and her bum, to the back of her legs. Minnie left a trail of kisses on her way up.
The Thai put more soap in her hands, and Miyeon could only watch with her heavy breathing when those hands moved all over the body they belonged to.
They kissed again, and several more times after that, before they got out of the steaminess that was behind the shower curtain.
Minnie used a blue towel to dry her girlfriend everywhere. Everywhere. Miyeon had almost started whining by now. Somewhere between the older’s moans, Minnie had managed to dry herself as well.
It barely even startled Miyeon when she fell down on the soft covers, as Minnie seated herself right above her. She could feel their bodies against each other, and started moving immediately.
Minnie helped the pressure that had been created. She let her hand do its job, while her mouth did it’s own. And her ears took in every sound Miyeon was making, before her brain stored them in the back of her mind.
Then, the sweetest of sounds came. Minnie didn’t even want to muffle it with her mouth. She let it spread out raw in the room.
Miyeon panted loudly underneath Minnie, with her mouth halfway open and her eyes closed. She smiled when she felt Minnie squeeze closer to her body and hold her in a warm embrace.
It was definitely worth waiting four months, Miyeon thought. Minnie had the exact same thought, while she pulled the older even closer while waiting for her to calm down, so they could do the same over again.
“Well, that shower was pointless.” Miyeon said after a couple of minutes.
“It was hot though.” Minnie said into her neck. “Wanna do it again?”
“You’re too horny for your own good.” Miyeon commented with a chuckle, but she’d let Minnie do it to her over and over again.
*
*
*
Shuhua’s arm interlocked with Soojin’s as they made their way into the hospital room. The older had squeezed herself close to Shuhua’s side, as she held a hard grip on her arm.
“Hey!” Yuqi screamed with a frown. “You left me alone all morning to be with her?”
Shuhua was happy her best friend was back to her old ways, even though that meant getting tinnitus about a hundred times a day.
“No, I was gonna eat and then she just came over.” the younger argued.
Behind them came the second pair, that, alike Soojin and Shuhua, also were clinging onto each other.
“Wait, is this how it’s gonna be now?” Yuqi asked, making them all furrow their eyebrows. “Me being a fifth wheel every time we hang out until Soyeon comes back?”
It seemed like the three other girls reacted to the first part of the sentence, as Shuhua rolled her eyes and the oldest couple laughed, but Soojin reacted to the last part.
And Yuqi must’ve seen the way Soojin’s face turned uneasy upon hearing the sentence.
“She’s not coming back, is she?” the Chinese asked.
Miyeon and Minnie had seated themselves on chairs against the window, and Shuhua was making her way to the chair right by Yuqi’s side. Soojin walked towards the bed, and stood still without speaking at all.
”The thing with Soyeon,” Minnie started saying, “is that you never really know what she’ll do. She could fly to Europe, or just hide in the janitor’s closet.”
The older two made their way to the bed as well, and sat down by her feet. Minnie rested her back against the edge of the bed, and Miyeon seated herself in Minnie’s lap to let her side press against the younger’s front. Minnie brought her arms around Miyeon’s waist, and pecked her neck with a soft kiss.
Soojin motioned for Yuqi to scoot over, which the younger did. The dancer laid down beside her, and looked up at the railing.
“Don’t cuddle without me!” Shuhua protested, and climbed in on Yuqi’s other side.
She put her arm around her best friend, and snuggled into her neck, something the girls rarely did.
“I don’t think five girls should be in one bed.” Yuqi commented.
“You’ve obviously never had a fivesome before.” Minnie snickered, followed by Shuhua who did the same.
Miyeon hit Minnie’s arm and gave her a warning look, to which the younger mouthed an apology.
“Why did she run away?” Yuqi decided to ignore Minnie’s comment. ”Because of home?”
Minnie shrugged.
“She never really told us how it was at home.” she said.
“I’ve known her since I was ten but I don’t know anything about how it’s like for her at home.” Miyeon added.
“She told me that her parents are homophobic.” Yuqi frowned.
Shuhua noticed Soojin’s quietness. Although that wasn’t very unusual, it was unusual that she didn’t say a word when they spoke about the person she undoubtedly knew the best.
“JinJin?” she called out.
Soojin wondered if she should tell everything. Soyeon was never one to lie, but she had a lot of secrets. Soojin shared most of them, but there were even a few she couldn’t know. And although she was open about there being something she couldn’t say, she never told anyone what she held secret. No matter how desperate the people around her became.
So if Soyeon never told them about her family, she didn’t want them to know.
“She ran away because she had to.” Soojin decided to say.
Well, it wasn’t a lie.
“Was it because of me?” the Chinese asked with her head turned to Soojin.
The older turned her own head, looking back into Yuqi’s eyes. The younger’s eyes were deep and darker than normal.
“She said she doesn’t want to see me again.”
“It’s not because of you.” Soojin reassured. “She likes you a lot, that’s the problem.”
“How can that be a problem?”
“It’s...” she wondered again if she should tell, but she couldn’t. “She’ll come back one day, okay? And then she’ll explain everything to you.”
The dancer and the girl who was left behind met eyes for a minute. Soojin wondered if Yuqi believed what she’d told her, or if she thought they were nothing but hopeful wishes. Maybe they were hopeful wishes, or just simple lies. Even if Yuqi wouldn’t believe what she’d said, she wanted to believe it herself, because Soyeon didn’t only leave Yuqi behind.
Then, the Chinese turned her head back, and closed her eyes.
“What if,” she sighed before continuing, “for one minute, we could just lay here without thinking about all the shit going on around us.”
Soojin turned her own head back, and closed her eyes. She felt a body laying down on top of her, with arms on her side and the other sneaked away somewhere else. Miyeon grunted as she was pushed down, and muttered a quick apology to Soojin, but didn’t move away after. On Soojin’s side, she heard Shuhua complain loudly, to which Minnie complained right back at her, before she felt movements in the mattress and figured Minnie had plopped down on Shuhua.
“Let’s do that.” she said. “For one minute”
And they stayed like that, for more than one minute. Miyeon couldn’t recall when she dozed off, but she figured it was somewhere between Minnie’s jokes and Yuqi’s snoring.
She only woke up when a train crashed into the room. Well, to her, it felt like a train.
In reality, it was the three non-Koreans screaming at each other over a card game.
“But I placed the seven first!” Shuhua argued.
“No, that was me! That was my card!” the undoubtedly loudest of the three screamed.
“Just stop fighting already so I can play!” the Thai joined.
How they managed to play, on a bed with five girls, and Miyeon in the middle of it, she didn’t know.
But she decided to groan, as a way to tell them to shut up. Well, it didn’t work. Instead of a peaceful room, she heard screams in a language she didn’t understand, and a pair of lips pressed on her cheeks, before more complaints but in Korean.
“You can’t wait five minutes to do that?” the Chinese question.
Miyeon opened her eyes just for the sake of glaring at the two irritating kids. They looked at Miyeon, before looking at each other, and breaking down into laughter.
The older rolled her eyes, before seeing Minnie’s hand rise, which was followed by two slapping sounds, and two separate whines from two separate girls. The oldest smiled to herself.
Soojin hadn’t made a single sound the entire time, so Miyeon looked up to check if she even was awake.
Her cousin was awake, and smiling widely. Soojin’s eyes were glued to the youngest, glimmering and screaming out tenderness. She wasn’t even taken out of her trance when Miyeon stared at her, so the older decided to let her live in her imaginary world.
“You cheated!” Miyeon was however taken out of her trance by her girlfriend’s loud shout.
“I did not!”
“You did!” Shuhua took Minnie’s side.
“You’re my best friend, not hers!”
“But I’m right!”
“Shut up.” Miyeon complained. “Since I’m the oldest, I decide that Yuqi cheated-“
“But-“
“Quiet!” she warned and bit down on her jaw. “And I decided that you never, ever get to play this game with me in the room, again.”
The whole room fell silent, for a minute before the shouts continued.
Miyeon rolled her eyes back, and tried to bury her head in Soojin, to keep the noise out.
The dancer didn’t know how the time had passed so quickly, but soon she received a text from her mother asking if her and Miyeon were eating dinner at home, so she looked out the window to see it already being dark.
“Miyeon.” Soojin called out.
Her body was almost numb from having another one on top of her since early in the morning, but she enjoyed the closeness, for once in too long.
The older looked up at her.
“Are you eating at home?”
“No.” Minnie said, holding out the vowel and reaching for Miyeon’s hand. “Come home with me.”
Miyeon placed a hand on her cheek, and brushed over it with her thumb.
“We can hang out tomorrow.” she said before pulling her in for a kiss.
“Get out of my bed before you do that.” Yuqi started punching them away, and soon all girls were up.
The oldest couple left the room, to do god knows what in Miyeon’s car before Soojin got there.
And when Soojin was about to leave, Shuhua was pushed forward by her sister.
“Go do your love confession out in the hallway, I don’t need more love to be jealous of today.” she said, smirking while doing so.
Shuhua eyed her, before leading Soojin out. She closed the door behind her, and both girls stopped outside it. The older looked everywhere else than at Shuhua, until they both spoke.
“Shuhua-“
“Soojin-“
They chuckled.
“You first.” Soojin said.
“Well, uh-“ Shuhua said as redness grew on her face. “I was just going to say that... I’m gonna focus on my family right now. You know, with everything going on...”
The Taiwanese was going to focus on her family, because there was a lot going on and they did need each other right now, but that didn’t mean she couldn’t make time for Soojin.
“But-“
“I get it.” the older cut her off. “Yuqi needs you right now... and your parents.”
“Yeah, but-“
“We wouldn’t work out anyway.” Shuhua’s face fell. “I just broke up with someone and you... We need some time for ourselves, right? To figure stuff out?”
Whatever Soojin thought Shuhua needed to figure out was clear as day.
“But-“
“Don’t worry about it.” she smiled, but Shuhua couldn’t manage to return it. “We’re too different. And we’ll still be friends and all that...”
The younger couldn’t bring herself to say anything. The pain she felt in her chest made her think she would fall apart any minute, and end up in one of the beds, like Yuqi.
“Well, I’ll see you.” was all Soojin said before walking away.
Not a hug, a pat, or anything. A rejection, and nothing else.
Shuhua rarely cried. This was one of those rare times. As she couldn’t stay in the hallway when she cried, because she wanted the least amount of people seeing her, she turned back and went into the room.
“How’d it go, Romeo?” Yuqi asked with a smirk.
It quickly disappeared when she saw the tears running down her best friend’s cheeks. Shuhua slowly came walking towards her, before laying down beside her in the bed, between Yuqi’s arms.
The older hushed her, as she buried her head into Yuqi’s neck. She sniffled while the salty water entered her mouth as well as spread across the older’s skin.
“It’s okay, Shu.” Yuqi whispered.
And there they laid, two broken girls in one hospital bed. The evening was grey outside the window.
Yuqi wondered where Soyeon was, what she was doing, if she was okay. If she missed her.
She would never get an answer to any of those questions.
*
*
*
“I’ll text you when we’re home.” Miyeon said while Minnie opened the door.
“You could always come here later.” she said and turned her head. “Mac won’t mind.”
She leaned in for a kiss. And one more. And a last one.
“I’ll see you tomorrow, babe.” Miyeon said against her lips.
Minnie stole another kiss, before turning her head to the backseat.
“Goodnight, SooSoo.” she said.
Soojin, who’d been staring out the window the entire way, gave her a quick, twisted smile before looking back out the window.
Miyeon and Minnie gave each other a knowing glance, before the Thai pulled the other in for a kiss one last time.
“Love you.” Minnie whispered.
“Love you too.” Miyeon said back.
She pecked her, before leaving and closing the door behind her. Minnie watched as the black car drove away, before she unlocked the door and entered her house.
She could swear the flowers in the middle of the room were yellow and dead this morning, but now they were bright red and healthy. Maybe Mac bought new ones, although that was nothing like him at all.
Then, she saw the shoes. Brown costume shoes and black heals. Unless Mac had a date he hadn’t told her about, with two people, then there were only two people those shoes could belong to.
And when she heard the footsteps behind her, she knew for sure Mac hadn’t brought home two rich potential partners.
“Nicha.” she heard behind her, and felt shivers up her spine.
“Father.” Minnie turned around and greeted with the best smile she could form.
Then, she remembered what she was wearing. A hoodie that was too big for her figure, and a pair of loose jeans. Not anything like her mother dressed her, like her parents thought she dressed.
“I didn’t know you’d be home today.” she said.
“I can see that.” he glared down at her. “There’s something for you in the kitchen.”
He then walked off, and Minnie knew she had to follow immediately, so she did.
She did not expect Mac keeping his head down on the counter chair, nor Taejeon giving her a weak smile from the kitchen table. But the least she was expecting, was her mother crying by the sink, while aggressively wiping a tissue under her eyes.
“What is this?” Minnie asked and looked around at them.
“Your mother and I landed at midnight, and were home early in the morning.” Mr Yontararak said.
Something in Minnie already knew what was coming, but she didn’t want to admit it just yet.
“I must’ve been sleeping then.” she said and let out a fake laugh.
“Yes, that’s what we thought. But we heard noises coming from your room.”
Oh god.
“We thought Taejeon was here with you, but after a quick phone call he informed us that he never spends the night in your bed.”
Minnie wanted to disappear. No, she wanted to die.
“Your mother got worried, so she went up to check on you. Not in a million years did she expect to see a woman in your bed.”
“We were just-“
“Let me rephrase.” he cleared his throat and took a step closer to his daughter, while her mother let out a loud cry from her side. “Your mother did not expect to see you kissing the woman in your bed.”
Minnie felt the huge lump in her throat, and bit her lower lip to keep her tears in.
“Does Taejeon know about this woman in your bed?” her father asked.
The daughter didn’t even have to look at the guy to know that he was begging her not to out him.
“No.” Minnie wasn’t a monster.
“Does your brother know about her?”
“No.” she could rather call herself a saint.
“Do you know how much of a disgrace you are to this family?” he used a louder voice.
Minnie bit her lower lip harder.
“I won’t make this young man suffer through a marriage with someone like you.” he said between his teeth. “We will find you a wealthy man in Thailand, that won’t need more of you than your womb.”
“Father-“ Minnie looked up.
“I don’t want to hear your voice.” he said firmly.
“Please.” she begged, with a tear leaving her eye.
“Give me your phone.” he reached for her hand where she unfortunately had kept her device, making him able to take it away before Minnie even reacted.
He brought it up to his face, and lifted an eyebrow.
“Miyeon.” he muttered. “I see...”
“Please, father.” Minnie tried again. “I love her.”
“You do not.” he muttered. “Do you see what you’re doing to your mother? To your brother? Your boyfriend?”
She couldn’t stop the tears anymore.
“Our plane leaves tomorrow morning.” Minnie’s eyes opened to big orbs. “Don’t try anything. I’ll keep my eyes on you all night.”
“Let me say goodbye, please.” she tried.
“You won’t get to lay your eyes on her ever again.”
The girl fell down to the floor. She didn’t care about the words her father screamed at her. All she could think about was her girlfriend, her world, her Miyeon who waited for her reply, but never would get one.
On the phone the man almost destroyed in his hands, was one message from one person. It read:
“Change of plans. I miss you. Come over.”
*