Chapter Text
Colin doesn’t know what Eloise said to Pen, but things change after Lancaster is out of the picture. For instance, eye contact. It used to have no purpose other than assure the other they were paying attention, or to share amusement at a clever quip or absurdity. But now, it’s prolonged and charged with something that takes his breath away. And touching. She’ll tap his forearm when he says something funny, sending shivers up and down his spine. Once at dinner, their knees rested against each other’s for the entire meal. He felt drunk, though he hadn’t had any wine.
Sometimes they don’t even talk at all. He doesn’t feel like he needs to perform for her. She’s more relaxed too. The self-conscious need to impress each other is gone. They can just enjoy being in each other’s presence.
This state of affairs lasts a week.
Maybe it’s the perfection of her pert, upturned nose. Or the rich auburn color of her hair flowing behind her. Or the blue of her eyes set in rosy, milky skin. Or it could be the sharpness of her wit or her keen intelligence. She makes him laugh. Or the way her body had felt pressed next to his while they waltzed. The rightness of it. Or the way she’d ducked her head while talking to him, a gesture so familiar he associated it with her, and wanted to tilt her chin back up and give her a kiss, right there in the middle of the ballroom. Whatever the reason, Colin decides, after a night of particularly restless sleep and ...athletic dreams, that something must be done. Therefore, he spends the entire morning pretending to read in the window in the front of the house, but actually watching to see if her door will open.
He intercepts her as she’s walking across the street. She’s wearing a lovely green dress, the emerald color bringing out the sparkle of her eyes and the red undertones of her hair, which is loose about her shoulders, as always. He wants to run his fingers through it.
“Oh, Colin! I was just going to visit Eloise,” she says.
“In that case, can I escort you?”
“I would like that very much.”
She takes his arm. Rather than going inside, he steers her to the backyard, under the tree with the swing. She doesn’t say anything about Eloise. Rather, she seems to be working her way up to something.
“I need to talk to you,” they both say, simultaneously.
“Please, you go first,” Colin says.
“I’d really rather hear what you have to say.”
“I insist.”
“No, it’s not important.”
“Are you sure? You look peaky.”
“Colin, please tell me what you were going to say.”
He takes a deep breath. Makes eye contact. Opens his mouth. “Nope, I can’t, I’ve lost my nerve.” He swipes a hand through his hair and paces in a short circle.
“Fine, I’ll go first. I--” He looks up expectantly, searching her face with his eyes. She has to squeeze her own shut. He places one hand on hers, which are clasped in front of her.
“No, wait, together.” He laces their fingers together.
She nods, her eyes still shut.
3.
2.
1.
“I’m in love with you and have been forever.”
“I’m in love with you and think we should get married.”
They both exhale loudly and take a second to register what the other said. Her eyes fly open.
“What?”
“What do you mean?”
“You really--?”
“Only if you--”
“Do you--?”
“Pen, I--”
“Colin--”
By now they’ve grabbed each other by the forearms and drawn their heads together in excitement, searching the other’s face for any hint of hesitation or deceit and finding none. All that remains there are disbelief and matching wide smiles.
“You’re really in love with me?”
“Yes, madly.”
And now, finally, he kisses her.
The sound she makes when their lips touch, the muffled “Oh!”, is one he’ll never forget. She immediately wraps her arms around his neck, standing on tiptoe straining to get closer. Initially, he’s content to keep the kiss sweet and chaste, to ride out the sea of emotions rather than stoke the fire of lust roiling under the surface. But she steps back, panting, and brings a hand up to her smiling lips. He feels dazed, like he’s just been hit over the head with a croquet mallet. Penelope draws him forward by his lapels and leans back against the tree, removing her gloves and tossing them to the ground. He crouches down to chase her lips, tracing them with his tongue before sliding in and pressing it hot against hers. She runs her fingers through his hair, pulling just a little too hard. It nearly brings him to his knees.
“God, Pen,” he groans into her mouth. He’s never felt like this before. Not ever.
He has to step away.
“Get back here,” she demands.
“You’re something else,” he says, and even he can hear the adoration in his voice. “But I’m not going to ruin you in my backyard where anyone can see. I need to calm down a bit.” He loosens his cravat and rolls up his sleeves, shaking out his arms and trying to will away his incipient erection. She fans herself, her cheeks and neck flushed. He wonders how far down that blush stretches and has to stop himself from reaching out towards her again.
“I really don’t mind being ruined,” she says, biting her lip and looking up at him through her eyelashes.
He laughs, delighted.
“I mean it, you’re the only one I ever hoped for. I don’t want any other man to touch me. Ruin me, if you like.”
He’s never been so tempted to take up an offer. “No, we’re going to do this the right way. Read the banns and do the church thing, let your mother fuss over your trousseau, the whole bit.”
“You were serious? You really want to marry me?”
“Yeah, Pen, I’m serious. Here, look.”
He gets down on one knee.
“Penelope Featherington, will you do me the honor of--”
“Yes,” she says, and bursts into tears.
He stands up and hugs her while she cries it out, and kisses her forehead while she wipes her eyes and nose with his handkerchief.
“I truly never thought this would happen,” she says.
“Thank you for waiting for me to get my head on straight.”
She merely kisses him in reply.
*
They enter the house together. Colin takes the stairs by twos to get up to Anthony’s study. Penelope finds Eloise in the dining room, having a snack with Francesca and Gregory.
“Can I speak with you in confidence?” she asks.
“Oh my god,” Eloise says, dropping the biscuit she was dunking fully into her glass of milk.
“Now, please.”
Eloise jumps out of her chair and drags Pen to the nearest empty room, which turns out to be the pantry.
“You didn’t!” she says, the words bursting out as soon as the door is closed.
“We’re engaged!”
Eloise puts her hands over her mouth and screams in excitement. Penelope feels the tears start up again, her mouth stretching in a smile so wide it hurts. Eloise pulls Pen close in a tight hug.
“Pen! I’m so happy for you! Look at you! You’re glowing!”
“I’m not sure I’m awake. I think this is a dream.”
“You’re all...red. He didn’t--? Am I going to have to challenge him to a duel for your honor?”
“No, my honor is still intact. Unfortunately.”
Eloise bats her on the arm, scandalized, and laughs. “Minx!”
“He’s asking for Anthony’s blessing, and your mother’s, and we’ll start planning the wedding as soon as possible.”
“Your sisters are going to be so sour-faced when you tell them!” She laughs wildly.
“Mama will be over the moon. This’ll be the first time I’ve ever done anything right.”
“We’re going to be sisters!”
“Imagine that! I’ll have a sister I actually like! ” The thought is almost too much. “Oh Eloise, I know you don’t agree, but I was so scared of becoming an old maid. I never thought I could ever be this happy.”
“You deserve everything you’ve ever wanted, Pen.”
Penelope knows that that’s not true. She’s going to have to confess to being Lady Whistledown, and to her role in the Colin/Marina affair, and she’s terrfied at how Eloise, Marina, and Colin will respond. But she’ll make a clean breast of it before the wedding. Just not today. Today, she’s going to bask in the joy of loving and being loved in return.