Chapter Text
When Hutao found out that Xiao really went to Venti for piano lessons, she burst out into a hysterical fit of laughter. Wheezing between every breath and slapping the table dramatically, Xiao could only look at her in complete and utter annoyance. Xiao shifted his baseball cap and lowered it over his eyes in an attempt to hide his growing blush, after all it was easier to deal with the friend at hand if he didn’t have to actually see her laughing her ass off. On that note, Hutao was the one who suggested it, why was she laughing about it now? If she didn’t want Xiao to do that then she should’ve never said it in the first place.
“Aw don’t look at me that way Xiao! It’s not my fault you couldn’t read between the lines and get that I was being completely sarcastic!” Xiao glared at the brunette from under the cap, wondering too why he even took her advice in the first place. “Well at least you could make up with Barbatos that way too right? Why are you so adamant on learning how to play his song?”
“Because, I was the one who upset him by saying his song was bad. I’m not going to let him continue thinking that and let what I say discourage him entirely.” Could he also say that he’s starting to be somewhat excited for the musical lessons? Yes Hutao was right in that this could be one way Xiao can make it up to him but it feels a little too one-sided on his part. Make Venti upset and then have him teach Xiao how to play his own song? It was all too narcissistic in Xiao’s opinion. At the very least Venti also seemed excited to teach him but Xiao didn’t miss the look in his eyes whenever he glanced at him. Teal eyes, full of calm and wonder, became sad and guilty whenever they locked onto Xiao’s golden ones.
‘This was my fault’ Xiao reminds himself. This was entirely his fault and thus should be his burden to bear. But would that mean that he would have to stop the music lessons in order to continue bearing that burden? Xiao doesn’t want to stop. He knows this in his mind but would never say it. Xiao knows the reason he doesn’t want to stop the music lessons is because he doesn’t want to be physically separated from Venti. He’s afraid this physical separation will cause the both of them to drift apart. That is what stops Xiao from agreeing to end the lessons. But this conundrum of being selfish and keeping up with it because he can’t bear the idea of the two of them drifting apart or being selfless and stopping the lessons because he knows how much he has hurt Venti and he doesn’t want to inflict salt onto a healing wound.
Xiao stands up from the bench and slings his bag over his shoulder. It’s about time for him to head to class with Professor Zhongli. Apparently today’s lecture is going to give the students time to research about a certain topic within the Han Dynasty. Yet another paper to write when he had just finished another two days ago. How lovely. Xiao hopes that he can make it through the class without nodding off. Should he grab a cup of coffee before he gets to class or should he risk it? With the past couple of days on top of his sleepless nights spent studying nonstop, everything seems like a blur and Xiao’s not too entirely sure on how to deal with it other than to keep pushing forward. Time doesn’t stop for anything and thus whether Xiao likes it or not, he has to move with it regardless if he is ready or not.
At the apartment, Venti oddly enough wasn’t in the mood to work on anything. Ever since that day Venti brought Xiao to the cafe to teach him piano he felt… different. Not in the sense that he is a changed person. It takes a lot more to change Venti’s everchanging heart that follows nothing but Venti’s own free will. But this feels more like he’s lost and everything in his head is murky and unclear. Wandering through a foggy mountain, dimly lit and odd sounds and noises fill the air but are too undistinguished to ever know what they really are. He can see the top of the mountain but the path is blurry. Ever since a young age, Venti always acted on impulse and did things he wanted to do at that moment but right now he’s holding himself back from something.
In all honesty, Venti was no longer mad at Xiao. He wasn’t the type to stay mad for a long time but don’t get that mixed up with forgiveness. Just because he isn’t mad anymore doesn’t mean he’ll necessarily forgive someone for what they did. In Xiao’s case, he hasn’t really forgiven him but he does feel a sense of growth to where he’s happy with the change that has been made. Perhaps he could forgive Xiao, but he’s unsure if he should.
“Argh but what am I unsure of?!” Venti groans into the empty air as he falls dramatically onto the couch in their living room, grabbing a throw pillow that was squished behind his back and hugging it tightly to his chest. There’s so much going on in his head and yet there’s nothing in his head. What a dumb paradox Venti has found himself in.
Venti ponders what he should do. Should he continue working on his newest song and the two half-written songs in hopes of getting an album produced instead of just releasing singles? Or should he do something else? He’s been working non-stop on music so maybe he should give himself a break. Upon a second thought, maybe he should go get a drink at the Angel’s Share, it has been quite a while since he last went. Maybe he could even get a couple drinks on the house if he gets a spot to perform and does well. If not he does have some savings for one or two drinks. Diluc was always somewhat of a pushover when it came to him so maybe he’ll be able to snag a discount.
That settles it, Venti is going to the Angel’s Share if he manages to get a spot for a performance. Sliding his phone out of his back pocket, he dials the Angel’s Share’s number since if he called Diluc’s phone directly then there would be a 95% chance that Diluc will decline the call before Venti has a chance to say anything. By calling the Angel’s Share’s number they have no choice but to answer.
“Hello?” Someone answers. It’s not Diluc but Venti has been to the bar long enough to know the voice of one of their most dedicated employees.
“Charles! How are you doing hehe,” Venti says with a smile even though he wasn't there in person.
“Venti?”
“Yes that’s me,”
“Oh hello, calling to book a show?”
“Yes I am. Sorry for the late notice but can I perform tonight? I’m free for the night.”
“Yeah about that…” Charles pauses, likely checking the bookings that he had on the computer, “Next couple of days the bar is booked for a rock singer by the name of Xinyan. Have you heard of her?” Venti can’t say he has. He listens to rock sometimes but only the mainstream ones, nothing underground or by emerging artists. “Well turns out she’s a popular rock singer from Liyue and the bar is going to be completely full. Going to feel like we’re running a concert in here,” Charles says, sighing into the microphone of the phone.
“Well when’s the earliest I can come and perform?”
“It’s going to be in around a month and a half at the earliest.” A month and a half? His boredom isn’t going to stretch that far. However, the fact still stands that Venti does want to perform in the Angel’s Share even though their rates are quite… high. Guess Venti will pop in for a drink or two and listen to the rock singer Xinyan perform, find out what she has.
“Can you book me in?” Venti asks, and Charles says he can. After a couple more brief exchanges, Venti hangs up the phone. Maybe he should try to get his new songs ready by then. Test it out to see how the crowd likes them.
Just at that moment, the front door opens to Xiao returning from school. Generally Xiao is a pretty unreadable guy. This is usually the cause for people to keep their distance from him because he always seems to be pissed by the world. Of course knowing him better it became easier for Venti to know how he’s feeling and by default Venti has a sense of Xiao’s attitudes and behavioural patterns to tell how he’s feeling. Today, he looks drained, tired and more concerningly, looking like he's about to fall over at any moment. Especially when he swapped his usual tea drinks for caffeine for a red bull can.
From the couch Venti watches Xiao drag his feet as he stumbles to his room and shutting the door behind him. Should Venti check up on him? Make sure he’s doing alright? Venti sits up from the couch and listens. Listening to what Xiao may be up to. Chances are that he’s extremely stressed from school because while Venti may like to stay up late composing, he can do so because he sleeps all day. Xiao on the other hand has classes during the day and lately, Venti noticed that when the sun goes down his room lights turn on and they don’t turn off until the sun goes back up. Not to mention that Venti rarely ever sees Xiao go eat dinners anymore. At least in the morning if Venti makes something for breakfast he’ll eat it. But he has been holed up in that room the moment he gets home from school to the time he has to go to school. It would be wrong of Venti not to check up on him.
Walking over to the door, Venti second guesses his choice. There’s a pretty high chance that Xiao will be in a pretty bad mood and who knows what will fly out of his mouth to get Venti to leave but Xiao does have a unique way of words that makes no one doubt their choices for leaving. But at the same time Venti is worried for Xiao, the younger is clearly not taking care of himself and is probably overwhelmed at the moment. And he’s definitely not the type to ask for help. Xiao sincerely believes that while his own problems are his to bear but he wouldn’t hesitate to help others carry their burdens. That’s probably Xiao’s worst aspect. He’ll help other people but won’t let others help him and what is left behind is this destructive path that is left in his wake. Venti has to help him.
Raising his hand to the door, Venti knocks. He’s not that inconsiderate to just barge into Xiao’s room when he’s like this. If anything, Venti needs to try his best to keep Xiao in a good mood.
“Come in,” Xiao says dejectedly. Oh the archons, even his voice sounds tired.
Turning the knob, Venti invites himself in. Xiao is sitting by his desk hunched over a bunch of papers and his monitor is displaying a word document. Another paper? Venti thought Xiao had just finished one. Is this for another class?
Xiao is an organized and pristine person and so far the state of his room looks nothing like what Venti knows it to be. The only thing that isn’t a mess is his bed. Perhaps this is the only thing Xiao has bothered to do when he gets up or... he hasn’t been using his bed in a long while. His desk was surrounded by binders, notebooks, textbooks and his school bag. Venti looks up at Xiao to find that he was looking at him, probably wondering what Venti wants.
Seeing the sunken eyes and dark eye bags, Venti wanted to help him. Xiao can’t keep doing this to himself. “Whatcha working on?” Venti says, trying to be cheerful. Xiao takes a deep breath and lets it out in one long exhale.
“Professor Zhongli is having me mark the student’s essays before they start their final,” Xiao says, fingers flipping through the thick packages of essays. On his left is a large pile and on his right was a much smaller pile of maybe two or three essays.
“Is that so? And is that another paper you have to write?” Venti asks, pointing at Xiao’s monitor. Xiao confirms that it is another paper that he has to write. “When is this all due?”
“The essays are next week and the paper is due in three weeks.”
So why was Xiao stressing himself out with all this work?
“Come, I think you need a break from homework,” Venti says, finally getting to the point of why he was in Xiao’s room to begin with as he could tell Xiao was beginning to feel agitated.
“No I can’t, I need to-” Xiao begins but Venti cuts him off.
“Need to take a break. Seriously, you’re destroying yourself at this point. Take a break, even if it’s just a couple of hours. In the long run these hours don't matter right? We’ll watch a movie and eat dinner. After that you can go back to doing all of this. Deal?” Xiao ponders over this for a while, Venti knows that Xiao knows he needs a break. Now it’s just a matter of whether or not he’ll let himself take the break. If not, Venti may need to force Xiao out of his room in order to make him take that break.
“Just two hours for the movie and dinner and that’s it right?” Xiao asks, clarifying Venti’s terms. Venti nods.
“That’s how long I’m going to keep you from your work but if you choose to extend that break then I’m not against it,” Venti says, raising his hands as if told to surrender. Standing up, Xiao walks towards Venti and grabs his hand, surprising him.
“You pick a movie and I’ll call for a delivery. You better pick a movie by the time the food arrives,” Xiao says sternly as he pulls a shocked Venti from his room and closes the door behind him before letting Venti’s hand go to make his call from the kitchen.
Venti had not been expecting Xiao to do that, it wasn’t like him. He had never seen him getting physical with anyone, violently nor affectionately. Maybe the stress really has gotten to Xiao’s head. Sitting on the couch, Venti turns on the TV in search of something to watch. As Venti goes through the list, nothing seems to peak his interest. Neither Xiao nor himself were fond of watching something they have already watched and the selection that Venti had to choose from weren’t the greatest either. Just a bunch of National Geographic documentaries about wildlife and archeology. They’ll bore them to death.
Venti’s eyes widened in realization. Maybe a thrilling blockbuster movie wasn’t what they (more specifically Xiao) needed. Maybe a super boring documentary on the founding of Teyvat was what they needed. Perhaps after Xiao has eaten and was watching this snoozer of a film, it’ll lull Xiao to sleep, making him rest! After all with a tummy full of food and a boring film, it’s a one way ticket to sleep!
“Are you okay with Liyuean food?” Xiao asks from the kitchen and with probably too much excitement, Venti eagerly agrees as he was looking forward to his plan being completed. The goal is that hopefully the movie will bore Xiao enough to fall asleep right then and there. A magic spell except there’s no magic and nothing about it was a spell, it’s just using Xiao’s own exhaustion against him.
Xiao returns and sits down on the couch beside Venti, leaving a cushion between them. “The food will come in fifteen minutes, have you picked something to watch?” Xiao asks, leaning on his palm that was propped up by the arm rest.
“Yeup, the only things on here we haven’t watched are the documentaries but I picked the most interesting one,” Venti smiles, flipping through the documentary selection to find one suitable to make Xiao fall asleep.
“A documentary? I didn’t know you liked them,” Xiao questions, looking over at Venti suspiciously. Venti doesn’t like them, he doesn’t really care for them. They too are a snooze fest for Venti. However, Venti is going to have to pretend that he likes them because Xiao isn’t the type of person to disagree with someone’s movie choices just because he doesn’t like them. Thankfully this is probably the only reason Venti can get away with this.
The food arrives and Xiao immediately heads to the door to get it from the delivery person, thanking them and returning to the living room with the Liyuean takeouts. Wanmin Restaurant is one of Venti and Xiao’s favourite restaurants. Chef Mao is great but when Xiangling is in the kitchen because she’s home from culinary school, that’s the best time to go to Wanmin Restaurant.
Venti presses play on the two and a half hour long documentary on the history of Teyvat (he picked the longest one he could find) and begins eating his dinner, making sure to keep an eye on Xiao as he ate his rice with almond tofu. Almond tofu was a desert food if Venti remembers correctly, not something Venti would pair up with plain steam rice. But then again, Xiao was a picky eater who likes the weirdest food combination ever created. Maybe this wasn’t so odd in the case for Xiao.
As expected, the documentary was boring beyond expectation and if it wasn’t for the food in front of him keeping his attention, then Venti could have easily passed out. It’s been approximately forty-five minutes since they’ve finished their dinner, but Xiao seems to be staying awake quite well. However when Venti looks at the dead yet concentrated eyes of Xiao, staring blankly at the TV screen, it seems like he’s not even watching it at this point. Just, staring straight through the TV and whatever was beyond it.
Reaching out to Xiao, Venti’s not even sure that he can do this but he does it anyway. Gently grabbing Xiao’s arm, he pulls Xiao to lay on his chest. Although confused, Xiao doesn’t fight it as he willingly lets himself lay on top of Venti. From this angle, Venti can see how hard Xiao is trying to keep his heavy eyelids open. Perhaps all that Venti needs to do to get him to rest is just a little more of a push.
Humming, Venti begins to gently comb through Xiao’s hair with his fingers. Making sure to lightly drag his fingers over his scalp to induce a more calming and relaxing feeling. Venti can see Xiao beginning to fall asleep. This was something his brother did to him whenever he couldn’t fall asleep. It usually worked on Venti and while Venti doesn’t know if it will work on Xiao, it was worth a try. Venti plays with his hair, twirling the longer pieces around his index finger before letting it fall loosely and repeating the process. Once he got bored of it, he went back to combing through Xiao’s hair until he realized that Xiao’s eyes are closed and his breathing is more regular and paced.
From then on, Venti stopped paying attention to the documentary and focused all of his attention on Xiao. To Venti, Xiao was someone he didn’t expect to be so fond of. But now humming a nameless tune as he watches the other finally getting the well deserved rest he needed was all Venti needed to convince himself. At this moment, it was like a ray of light finally showed Venti the clear path through all the murkiness in his mind. That at this moment, nothing else mattered and that maybe, just maybe, Keqing and Ganyu may have been onto something. That maybe just a small ounce of him truly does love Xiao more than just a friend.