Chapter Text
When Chris first mentioned the idea of reminiscing about camp, they had all laughed, but now, with no cameras filming in the privacy of the hot summer night, illuminated by the radiating warmth of the bonfire, the topic had come back up, and this time they felt much more comfortable and open sharing their best moments at camp.
Gwen started, “It was the day of the finale, just that whole day and night, I dunno, it made me feel so happy and alive. The excitement and hype that was building right up to that final challenge, and how close I was to the million, I don’t think I’ve ever felt so much like I was living in the moment.” She finished with a wistful, satisfied smile.
“And throwing Chris in the lake, man, that was the cherry on top,” DJ added.
Duncan smiled at the memory, “I can still see the look on his face.”
The fire crackled as they reminisced about that day.
“My favorite part of that day was finding so many ways to sabotage you,” Heather smirked.
Gosh, why did Heather still feel the need to be mean and ruin a perfectly happy moment? That habit was dying hard.
“And my favorite part of the day was locking you in the outhouse,” Leshawna wasn’t going to let Heather get away with that comment. “And let’s go back further, like when we locked you in the fridge, now that was a good time.”
Gwen joined in, “I know right! And when you got your head shaved. I can’t believe I saw it happen firsthand. I swear at that moment time slowed down.” She and Leshawna grinned at each other. “Not to mention when I poured Harold’s red ant farm in your bed.” Gwen glanced at Harold.
“Don’t bring me into this, gosh,” Harold was perfectly content in staying out of this poor excuse of a conversation that derailed into a back and forth of insults. Besides, he had lost his beloved red ant farm to that incident, so it wasn’t exactly a happy memory for him.
Gwen egged him on suggestively, “I’m sure you have some good memories involving Heather.”
She wasn’t wrong, but Harold still didn’t want to insert himself into this feud between the former Screaming Gopher girls. He looked over at Heather, surprisingly finding that she had brought her knees to her chest and had her arms crossed over her knees with only her daggered eyes glaring over them. He’d seen her like this before, in this defensive state.
Heather lifted her head, “Oh shut up, weird goth girl. I’m not afraid to read your diary again. I’m sure everyone is curious about your relationship with Duncan - oops, I mean Trent.”
“Don’t bring me into this either!” It was Duncan’s turn to interject.
Heather only dragged him in further, “Admit it Duncan, you’ve liked Gwen for a while. I remember how you looked at her when I ripped her skirt off in the rock climbing challenge.”
“And how you let me fall because of that,” DJ added.
Duncan shot him a hurt look, “Bro, I thought you were on my side.”
DJ stood his ground, “It's true.” Duncan frowned. DJ relented, “Well, you did bring Bunny back too.” Duncan's face softened.
“Speaking of ripped clothes, Heather…” Gwen segwayed back to her, “…Harold?”
Already hot from the fire, Harold felt his face heat up even more. No doubt Gwen was trying to get him onto her side of the argument, and no way he would be taking sides or humiliating Heather. All he wanted for the night was to relax on the beach and enjoy his poi. He supposed he would try to maneuver the conversation to something more positive.
“Well, one of my favorite moments was when I was eliminated. Leshawna, kissing you on the dock that night was the highlight of all 16 years of my life so far.” He and Leshawna locked eyes, but he was sure he saw some uneasiness in hers.
Of course Duncan had to ruin it. “But you and Heather skipped first base altogether.” Duncan wiggled his brows, or brow singular. “Remember when I took all your clothes and carried your bed out to the dock? And all the girls-”
“Oh no no no,” Leshawna cut him off and narrowed her eyes.
No one else seemed to find this funny either.
“C’mon DJ,” Duncan whispered, “You’ve gotta back me up.” But DJ had left. All eyes shifted to the empty spot where DJ was just a few moments ago. Huh, DJ seemed to go missing a lot. It was a bit suspicious, but Harold wasn’t too concerned, though he’d have to keep an eye on DJ in the future.
Harold sensed an opportunity to turn the conversation against Duncan. “I loved switching the votes to eliminate Courtney. I could’ve easily gotten rid of you, but getting rid of her was agonizing for you and really made you suffer.” Harold could be vengeful, and damn good at it too. To be honest, it made him feel powerful, but he knew not to indulge in that power. With great power comes great responsibility and all that. “I can’t believe you thought it was Heather who did it.”
“Watch it, Doris. You want me to tell everyone about every single prank I pulled on you in vivid detail?”
Harold challenged him, “Go ahead. It just goes to show how rude and petty you are as a person.”
They glared at each other from across the bonfire. Harold imagined Duncan was burning alive in the flames.
“I absolutely love this poi, especially the pineapple flavor,” Heather broke the silence with another jab at Leshawna.
What a shame that Leshawna had to miss out on the poi due to her allergy. Harold had allergies too, so he really felt for her. The poi was delicious. Not to mention, it was also a superfood.
“Getting that rash from the pineapple was worth it for getting you locked in the fridge,” Leshawna shot back.
“You’re lucky I like eating my food more than I like throwing my food.”
Gosh, if only his lady and his love could get along.
Gwen chimed in, aiming for Duncan, “ Somebody’s girlfriend was quite fond of throwing food.”
Scratch that. Gosh, if only his whole team could get along.
It seemed DJ was thinking the same thing. “Guys, can we at least try to get along?” Wait, when did DJ get back? “Let’s share some memories that don’t involve someone else’s suffering, okay?” DJ focused on Heather and Gwen, but dished out stern looks at everyone, including Harold himself.
“How about the weekend when the boys went to the cruise and resort? That masseuse knew exactly what she was doing. And all those desserts; I couldn’t even pronounce the names of everything. Oh, and my skin never felt smoother than after that trip. Duncan?”
“Oh yeahhh, if - no, when - I win the million, I’m gonna live just like that.” Duncan agreed with DJ. However, Duncan didn’t know when to stop, and he just had to bring up the girls. “But coming back and seeing how horribly all the girls were getting along reminded me of how close us guys were.”
DJ sighed, his attempt at pleasant conversation thwarted.
Now Harold would try to play peacemaker. “Can we all agree that the Playa Des Losers was really awesome?” Nothing too bad happened there, right? Well, he was assaulted by Courtney and was rejected by Leshawna a few times, but that was nothing in the grand scheme of things. How was he so resilient?
Thankfully, Heather endorsed him, “Honestly, it was the only actual good time I had last season. Finally, a few days where I didn’t have to interact with people that don’t like me.”
At least she didn’t name names.
“So, everybody?” Gwen scoffed.
No, not everybody , Harold hung out with her sometimes. He waited outside her room and kept asking to come in and talk even though Heather would just shut the door on him. Finally after a few hours of waiting, she let him in, saying that he looked pathetic sitting by her door and that she didn’t want other people to see him near her room. Harold didn’t really understand why Heather wouldn’t want to be seen with him. He thought he was a fan favorite and generally well liked. Plus, having any friend was better than having no friend at all. But he did as she wished, and kept their friendship mostly private.
Heather wasn’t as bad as she seemed, and Gwen wasn’t as nice as she seemed. Harold hypothesized that Gwen felt she was punching up by insulting Heather. Gwen was a loner, but anyone at any position on the social hierarchy had the capacity for meanness.
Harold didn't have to vouch for Heather because DJ beat him to it. “C’mon Gwen, Heather came down for my sandwiches, and she complimented my cooking. She even came back later for seconds.”
“Yeah,” Harold nodded. Thirds actually, he corrected mentally. When Harold went to Heather's room that afternoon, she wouldn’t let him in unless he brought her another sandwich. When he asked why she didn’t get her own, Heather said she already got seconds and didn't want to look like a pig for getting more food. They ended up sharing the sandwich.
If he actually answered Gwen when she asked about his good memories involving Heather, this would’ve been his number one. Harold couldn’t really pin down the feeling, but there was something so intimate about sharing food with someone.
Gwen looked surprised that the Gaffers were turning against her and backing Heather of all people, but Harold thought she deserved it for constantly instigating conflict and trying to pull him into the conversation. Maybe some of Heather’s hatred for Gwen was rubbing off on him.
The goth stood up to leave, stomping her boots and kicking up sand as she made her way to where Trent was waiting.
“Gonna go sneak off to the woods and make out with Trent like you did earlier with Duncan?” Heather called after her.
“Hey! We were not making out earlier,” Duncan yelled in response to Heather’s accusation and loud enough for Gwen and Trent to hear.
“And you weren’t helping out earlier either,” Harold muttered. Duncan had a weird habit of being both the most useless and the most helpful team member. He would do almost nothing for most of the challenge but somehow be integral to the win.
“Mm hm,” Leshawna agreed. “But you weren’t helping with the challenge earlier either.” She repeated Harold’s thoughts. Unlike him, Leshawna could handle directly challenging Duncan.
“But I won the first part! I think I deserved a little break.”
Leshawna retorted, “But we could’ve won the second part too if you and Gwen actually helped.”
“Yeah, plus we wouldn’t have had to see Leshawna’s dancing, ugh,” Heather added.
“Oh yeah? Well my dancing won the tiebreaker.”
“And your moves were epic, Leshawna.”
“Thank you, I’m glad somebody appreciates my dancing,” Leshawna smiled at Harold and made his heart flutter.
In this duel of wits between his lady and his love, his love shall have his favor.
However, both his lady and his love seemed to disregard him with the same disdain, not really taking him seriously - neither his assets or him as an asset to the team.
He started the day with a rejection from Heather:
“You mind? I was talking to my slop.”
He started the first challenge being ignored by Leshawna:
“Speaking of rock hard abs, have you ever seen my ten pack?” She didn’t even look!
And he ended the first challenge with insults from both of them:
“Your booty has an opinion?”
“That’s big job for such a saggy, sad little thing…and by ‘lady fans’ he means his mother!”
Harold was convinced that at the loss of his perfect behind, his lady and his love would be sitting in front row seats, mourning and tearfully weeping at the funeral. They’d want to speak at the podium, but would be too overcome with emotion to give a proper speech.
Or not. A guy like him could dream and imagine that his feelings were reciprocated with the same intensity.