Chapter Text
The date ends a little past dusk, by which point Sora's not sure whether he'd rather try to salvage the evening with a suitably colourful - and more importantly alcoholic - drink somewhere, or call the whole night quits and flop bonelessly onto the sofa with Paopu instead. It hadn't started off too badly; Anastasia seemed like a nice girl, and she was definitely interested in him, but after a while Sora felt less like a date and more like a dumping ground for her (many) grievances. Too polite to make excuses, he waited through what seemed like an endless procession of complaints, and by the time he was finally flagging a waiter down for the bill he could hardly even keep his trademark cheerful grin on his face.
He eschews the idea of a bar, since the meal ended up being quite a lot more expensive than he'd anticipated. He figures he's got almost everything he needs at home for a mojito anyway, so he just pops into a convenience store for a bag of limes on the way back to the apartment he shares with Kairi and Riku. While he waits in line he checks his phone to see if either of them have texted any updates on their respective evenings (they haven't). He hopes that means they're at least having better dates than him.
The apartment is dark and stuffy when he gets in, Paopu whining at him from the kitchen tiles as he pulls off his shoes.
"I'm coming, pup. Guess you had a rough night too, huh?"
They're a few months away from the worst of the summer heat, but their third-floor flat traps heat like one of Mom's quilts, and even cracking open the windows and turning on the fan doesn't do much to ease the thick air. Sora flings his tie over the back of the sofa, kicks his socks off somewhere and opens the freezer to a deliciously cold blast of air. Several ice cubes get sloshed into Paopu's water bowl and several more into a glass for himself. Soon he's pouring more rum than is maybe strictly necessary into his mojito.
Drink in hand, he drops unceremoniously onto the sofa, groping around for the TV remote, wanting the background noise more than anything. It's partly just him, he's sure. He's still feeling the break up with Rapunzel, and although he swears he's happy for her it doesn't help that she already has a new boyfriend. He knows he needs to put himself out there, plenty of fish in the sea, etc. etc., but the last couple of dates he's been on have only made him miss the comfort of a serious relationship more.
"Maybe this is it," he says to Paopu, who's splooting at his feet, panting laboriously. "I'm finally getting old."
He's being silly, of course. He's twenty-one: there's plenty of time to meet the girl of his dreams. He just wishes he could skip the meeting part and get to what really matters. He knows he would have married Rapunzel. They would have made great parents. Heck, he would have married Kairi.
Paopu, for what it's worth, gives him a look filled with no thoughts at all, and rolls hopefully onto his belly, tongue lolling out of his mouth.
He's not having an existential crisis over a bad date. It's just that Kairi's graduating next year and what if she meets The One and Riku finally gets a boyfriend and Sora's forever their fifth wheel, a guy with a hundred close female friends because they all find him so approachable. Platonically.
That's being too negative, he reminds himself as he takes a long sip of the mojito, which could be sweeter but is at least alcoholic enough to perk him up. It was just one bad date. And anyway he'll feel better hearing about Kairi and Riku's dates once they get home. Kairi's on a blind date, and Sora's sure she would have left by now if she wasn't having fun - her and her college friends have a whole system of emergency date escape plans. As for Riku, he's going out with a guy he met at the gym whose attractiveness even Sora can appreciate. He's the rugged, muscular, tattooed type that makes Riku's brain short circuit, so as long as he doesn't get himself tied up with nerves Sora's sure it will go great. He resists the urge to text either of them - he doesn't want to interrupt their dates, especially since there have been a few awkward misunderstandings in the past about the nature of Sora's relationship with either of his friends. Instead he gets up to make another mojito, wondering whether he should go out anyway; maybe it's just what he needs to forget his (if he's being honest with himself, miserable) date. But as he's opening Facebook to check if any of his friends are already out dancing the front door clicks open.
"Hey, Paopu," comes Kairi's voice from the hallway. "Huh, who got home early?"
"Me," Sora calls from the living room, peeping through the doorway to watch Kairi dispose gratefully of her heels. She's wearing a black and pink dress that looks absolutely amazing on her, smart without being too formal and accentuating curves that Sora, of course, isn't paying any attention to.
"Good date?" he asks hopefully as Kairi heads to the kitchen cabinet for a glass. She doesn't reply, but she does pour herself an extremely strong rum and cola, which isn't an encouraging sign.
"Tell me about your date first," she says grimly once she's got a chunk of lime floating in her drink, gesturing for him to sit with her on the sofa.
"It was… well, the food wasn't so bad. I had ravioli. She had pizza." The most expensive pizza on the menu and dough balls and a side of potato wedges and several quite pricy cocktails, but Sora doesn't think it charitable to mention those. What he does say is enough for Kairi to pull a face, though.
"That bad?"
Sora cradles his mojito as he sinks glumly into the sofa cushions. "She just spent the whole night complaining. She's mad at her Mom. And her sisters. About everything. And… I don't mean to complain, but she spent nearly ten minutes telling me about how her two hundred dollar designer handbag wasn't quite the right shade of purple to match her dress, and then didn't even offer to split the bill? I know that's kinda cheap of me, but she knows I'm only a care home assistant. If she's got so much money, I dunno." He feels bad saying it, but thankfully Kairi gives him a sympathetic grimace.
"Spoilt girls are the worst. There are so many of them on campus. Single-handedly put me off joining a sorority for life." She nudges Sora's side gently with her knee. "You wanna hear about how bad my date was?"
"Oh no."
"So. His name's Gaston. He's French. He's got muscles to put Riku to shame, so not really my type, but I think you know what, I'll give it a chance. French guys are supposed to be sensitive, right?"
"Oh, no."
Kairi waves her glass, almost slopping her rum and cola out of the side. That's when Sora notices she's actually a little bit drunk.
"Sora. He talks about himself. The. Whole. Entire. Evening. I literally couldn't get a word in edgeways."
"Oh, no..."
"If I have to hear in that much excruciating detail a guy's entire workout routine ever again I swear I'll just go whole hog and become a lesbian," Kairi says dramatically, taking another much-needed slug of her drink. "At one point he was literally flexing. Like this." She demonstrates a sequence that has both of them laughing. "Sora, you should have seen the faces the waitress and I were exchanging. In the end I was only staying for the free food. I had several glasses of pretty good wine, too, which helped."
"Okay, that sounds even worse than my date," Sora admits. "At least Anastasia was just kind of a bummer."
"He tried to take me out dancing afterwards. Of course he's a world-class dancer. Was once in a theatrical performance of- yaaaaawn. But I managed to get away. Well, he didn't get the message at first and followed me for three blocks, so as soon as I got to a crowded bus stop I heeled his foot and made a break for it." Kairi tips her head back, groaning. "Riku had better be having an amazing date."
"He hasn't texted for us to come rescue him, so that's a good sign." Sora takes another sip of his mojito, surprised to find there's not much left of it besides crushed mint leaves and ice. He looks at Kairi, who's closed her eyes, her breasts pressing against the low neckline of her dress with each slow inhale. Her thigh is still touching his, and even over the early summer mugginess he can feel the warmth of it.
It's been nearly four years since they broke up. Sora's moved on, and anyway their seventeen-year-old selves are virtually unrecognisable to him now. But it's at moments like this that he feels that same old pang of longing, the echo of a wish that things had worked out between them.
Without opening her eyes, Kairi swallows the last of her rum and cola and announces: "Being single sucks."
Sora lets himself sigh. "Yeah." He almost asks if she wants to go out dancing, but then she sits up straight and says, "I'm gonna put on something more comfortable."
"Right. That's a good idea." They both head to their rooms, emerging a few minutes later in shorts and matching powder-blue tank tops.
"Snap."
"That means I have to give you my clothes, right?"
"Pffft. Sora." Kairi shoves him playfully. "Our dates weren't that bad."
Despite himself, Sora wonders how bad a date Kairi would need to have to consider hooking up with him. It's a stupid thought though, not to mention an unchristian one, so he chides himself for it silently and determines to distract himself from the soft pale flesh of Kairi's thighs with something else.
"Let me make you a cocktail." He grabs one of the unused limes from the counter and tosses it casually. "How about a daiquiri to ease your troubled soul?"
"You're amazing," Kairi sighs, returning to the sofa and coaxing Paopu up onto her lap.
"Better than Gaston?" Sora jokes.
"Oh, heaps. At least when you forget to let anyone else talk what you're saying is interesting."
Sora laughs as he puts the stove on to make simple syrup. "That's one heck of a backhanded compliment. Let's put some music on."
"Ooh. ABBA. I need something that won't let me down." Kairi digs around for a CD and soon the opening lines of Waterloo are ringing through he apartment, Kairi joining Sora in the kitchenette. "He was boasting about how many eggs he eats every day, Sora. It was so bad."
"I'm surprised you didn't leave sooner."
"I was absolutely determined to get dessert. The restaurant had a raspberry cheesecake on the specials menu. My my, I tried to hold you back, but you were stronger..."
"Woah yeah," Sora echoes without thinking, "And now it seems my only chance is giving up the fight…"
Kairi laughs. "This takes me back. Remember when we got that battery operated CD player? I was pretty much ready to never leave the treehouse. You know, the one Riku broke."
"I'm pretty sure that was because I lent Tidus one of his Dolly Parton CDs without asking and he lost it."
"I mean, yeah," says Kairi. "But mostly it was because he didn't know how to handle being hopelessly in love with you."
Sora doesn't know what to say to that - even after all this time - but thankfully the sugar has dissolved into the syrup, so he has the excuse to ask Kairi how strong she wants her cocktail as he takes it off the stove.
"Very."
A couple of songs later he's joining her on the sofa, drinks in hand.
"Oh, Hasta Manana, I'm skipping this one. I killed it listening to it on repeat after we broke up."
"Hasn't it been long enough?" Sora jokes, but his voice comes out a fraction of a note flat, betraying him. Kairi glances at him for a long moment, then seeming to catch herself, looks away.
"Yeah, probably. But it's a bummer, anyway." She skips Dance (While The Music Still Goes On) too. "Tell me more about Anastasia."
"Hmm…" Sora feels kind of bad about complaining, but he's glad to at least be back in safe territory. "She really hates her sisters. She spent half an hour talking about this party they were all going to, and her stepsister borrowed her pearls without asking or something… I'd kind of stopped listening by that point, actually."
"Was she cute, at least?"
"Well, you know I like redheads."
Kairi grins. "Maybe I should dye my hair red again."
It's not like they never make jokes like this - Sora even flirts with Riku from time to time just for fun. But maybe he made their daiquiris too strong, because Kairi's line sounds less like a joke and more like a come-on.
"Ooh, you'd better watch out..." croons Björn from the CD player.
"I'd say it suits you, but you know I'm biased."
"Hmm." Kairi toys with her hair. Currently it's not that far off her natural dark brown. "I do need to do something with it. My roots are getting dangerously close to first-year Riku length."
"Pillarbox red."
"And I'm tired of waiting… yes, it's driving me crazy…"
"Pfft. No." Kairi nudges Sora's leg with her foot and he tells himself firmly that no, this is definitely platonic territory, regardless of what ABBA may or may not be implying. "I would like to be employable when I graduate."
"That makes this your last chance. Before you have to be a boring corporate sell-out."
Kairi laughs, prodding his side. "Do you want me to help cover the rent with all my sell-out money or are you too morally pure?"
"No. Noo. I'll take the dirty money." Sora catches her arm without thinking, and then he can feel the warmth of her skin against his palm and he kind of knows he should let go but he doesn't want to. He knows it's over. It's been over for years, they're destined to find other people, they work as friends, and-
"It's dates like this that really make me want to kiss you," says Kairi suddenly. Then she adds, glancing at her glass: "Or maybe daiquiris like this."
Oh no, thinks a certain part of Sora's mind. The other part, rapidly gaining ground, thinks: Oh yes? Yes? Yesyesyesyesyes?
"I feel like that compliment is even more backhanded," he manages to say, backing away ever so slightly from the edge of what could be a very steep cliff. He thinks, we could kiss. We definitely could kiss. And that definitely, absolutely, probably would be a bad idea.
"I wish things had worked out between us," Kairi says, her tone of voice not helping Sora's internal battle in the slightest. "I think we could have made a good couple."
"We did," says Sora, remembering dates at Olive Garden chaperoned by one of Sora's sisters, secret places in the woods where they would talk and make out, study dates that didn't involve much studying. But he also remembers arguments and not being honest, not truly, and finally Kairi sitting next to him on the jetty next to the boat house, both of them staring at the water so they wouldn't have to look each other in the face. He remembers the heartache that felt like it would never fade. And most of him means it when he says: "But I think we make better friends."
"Yeah," Kairi agrees. Realising his hand is still wrapped around her arm, Sora makes to pull away, but glancing up her heart-shaped face is so close, her eyes wide and her lips slightly parted, and Sora knows that expression, from years ago when they were young and stupid. Well, younger and stupider. Then she sighs, and Sora thinks she'll make some well-trodden comment, leading them back to a safer path, but instead she murmurs: "But sometimes I still miss you."
"Me too." The words slip out of Sora's mouth before he even realises he's thinking them. And for a moment they look at each other in surprise, like they were both so certain that the other one would stop them from jumping, and Sora almost laughs the whole thing off until Kairi touches his cheek so gently, and there's still a chance not to do something incredibly, undeniably stupid, and she tastes like sugar and lime and the crisp sting of alcohol.
I tried to hold you back, but you were stronger…
His body resisting with every muscle, Sora pulls away, and Kairi pulls back too.
"Oops."
"Sorry."
"Maybe our next drink should be non-alcoholic."
"Yeah, that's. Probably a good idea."
Sora distracts himself scratching Paopu's ears as Kairi putters about behind him in the kitchenette, humming along to the music. After a few minutes she leans over the back of the sofa, passing him a glass of daiquiri-sans-rum.
"You know I really like you. As a friend."
"Yeah, no, same."
"It's not like I haven't thought about it," she admits after a pause, resting her chin on her arms and looking at him fondly. "Asking you out again. But our friendship barely survived the last time, and… I guess you matter too much to me to risk that." Maybe something in Sora's expression is giving away his heart because she adds: "It's like. I know we can be good friends. Even if we marry other people. But what if...?" She looks at Paopu for support, but he only offers her a solemn stare as if to say why aren't you on the sofa petting me? "I couldn't bear losing you."
"Yeah," says Sora, hopelessly. "Yeah, me too." He doesn't specify exactly what he's agreeing to and maybe he doesn't have to. He pats the sofa next to him, where the cushion is still dimpled from Kairi's weight. He isn't sure he wants to think about Kairi marrying someone else, not when he can still feel the texture of her lipstick on his mouth. He's past this. He's past her. He was right: kissing Kairi was a really, really bad idea.
"I was really hoping you and Rapunzel would work out," Kairi says as she joins him on the sofa. "You guys were so cute together."
"Yeah," Sora agrees. He doesn't say anything else. He doesn't want to admit to a woman he's just kissed how much the heartbreak from his last relationship still hurts, even if it's Kairi.
"Man, Riku's date must be going really well. He's usually home by now, complaining about how the guy's eyes weren't quite the right shade of brown or something."
"Aww, don't be mean. Anyway, he's really into Gladio."
"When it's guys he's really into he's usually home even earlier," Kairi quips. Sora wants to tell her off, but he has to admit that she's not exactly wrong. "Oh, didn't you record that Poirot movie the other night? We should watch it while he's out."
"Yeah, sure."
They get everything set up and sit back to enjoy the movie, and Sora almost doesn't think about the feeling of Kairi's lips pressing against his as the clues leading to the culprit fly predictably over his head. Kairi shares more details about Gaston and rolls her eyes at Sora saying that Anastasia was a nice person, really, besides all the complaining and talking over him and being dismissive to the waitstaff.
"That's the biggest red flag," Kairi says sagely. "Gaston was a total asshole to the waitress too. He didn't even leave a tip, so I gave the poor girl fifteen dollars. I don't think he even noticed."
"I guess I'll text her tomorrow and say we can just be friends. Maybe she'll grow out of it."
"I've already blocked Gaston," says Kairi, which Sora can't help but agree is for the best. "Riku's really late, huh. I wonder if he's..." She performs an unmistakeable gesture.
"On the first date!"
"That's sometimes how it goes with gay guys," is Kairi's airy response, her eyes filling with amusement. "Although admittedly not usually with our gay guy."
"As long as he's having fun. I can't believe we both had terrible dates."
Kairi laughs at that, raising her glass of cola. "To terrible dates. And great, but terribly ill-advised kisses."
Somehow Sora finds it in himself to laugh too. He chinks his cola against hers.
"To bad dates and bad ideas."
"Oh! I like that. To Riku, bearing the standard for all three of us."
Riku doesn't get home during the movie, or even during the hour Sora and Kairi spend flicking idly through the late-night shopping channels looking for things to make fun of. It's only when Kairi's in her pyjamas and Sora's making hot chocolate that the lock on the front door clicks softly open, followed by Riku's voice saying, "Oh, shit. I was hoping you'd be asleep by now."
Sora waves Riku into the living room, Kairi scooching over to make room for him on the sofa.
"Sooo, loverboy. Tell us everything."
Riku looks - not fantastic. He says: "Tell me about your dates first."
"Oh dear," says Kairi. "That bad?"
Riku answers by flopping face first onto the sofa. Kairi pats his back comfortingly.
"I got stuck with a musclehead who was more in love with himself than anything else," she says, "And from the sounds of it Sora got used as a free therapist for the evening. So you've got that to beat."
Riku lets out a long, low groan.
"I threw up."
"Oh no. Was it something you ate?"
This time, Riku's groan is more like a whine. "Kind of." At great length, he adds: "If you count…"
"If you count what?"
"Leave me alone," Riku mutters through the sofa cushion. "I'm going to die single." And then, very, very quietly: "Underestimated my gag reflex."
Sora claps his hands over his mouth to hide a bubble of horrified laughter, and from the look of it Kairi's struggling to hold it in too.
"Shut up," Riku groans, even though neither of them have said anything.
It's Kairi who recovers first, her voice admirably steady as she says, "Oh, Riku. Was the rest of the date at least nice?"
"I'm going to have to find a new gym."
There's still a bit of rum left. Figuring Riku deserves it the most, Sora pours it neat into a glass while Kairi props him up on the sofa. Their eyes catch as Sora presses the rum into Riku's hand. Neither of them mention the kiss.