Chapter Text
The silence of the room had never felt this loud. Thanatos kept his eyes shut as tight as possible. The cover began to let cold air seep in, gracing his warmed skin. He swallowed, but his throat felt like sandpaper. He pushed his dry lips together as he took a deep breath. This is not working. Thanatos peeled his eyes open to be greeted by a spacious, beautifully decorated room. The deep night sky covered the window panes. He reached through the darkness to check his phone. 4am...Crap. He cursed his phone screen for almost blinding him and groaned, rubbing his eyes. He felt too agitated to attempt to sleep right away. Perhaps a cool glass of water would ease his nerves. In one deep breath, he pulled himself up and put his phone back down. He promised himself that this trip will be quick. He prayed that the blue light wouldn’t keep him up longer than he would like.
Through the spacious guest room, out the door, to the wide hall and down the steep theirs. The top floor was pitch black, but Thanatos had no trouble seeing in the dark. The stairs gave him a soft glow, casting a faint shadow onto the ceiling. The marble of the ground floor felt cold against Than’s ankles. His slippers dragged as he walked towards the kitchen. Then, the sound of the piano broke through the atmospheric noise and began to seep into his ears. He stopped himself just to listen, his heart began to race a little. The song had a low pitch and each note felt slower than the last. The familiarity of the song's chorus made Thanatos tilt his head. It mixed with the reverb of the hallway, which made the darkness of the mansion feel disturbing, and Thanatos had never been afraid of the dark. The music cuts abruptly, the final note left Thanatos in disdain. Eventually, the chorus was playing again, same tempo, same pace, same dreariness. Than took a detour to follow the source of the song. If his memory was accurate, Mr. Hades’ mansion should have a room occupied by a grand piano past the common space and down the hall to the right. As he stepped closer to a pair of double doors, the louder the piano played. Abruptly, it stopped, it played again.
Thanatos quietly pushed open the door with his shoulder and a freezing gust of air brushed his face. Behind it revealed a beautifully decorated room, occupied with a soft candle glow. Couches were cleaned with pillows fluffed, ready to be laid on. The coffee table was topped with a fake plant, filled with marbles. Chairs sat idly in corners, glass shelves balanced the room with small items resting upon them. Red, brown, and gold was embedded into the room's furniture. In the back and center of it all stood an elegant, obsidian grand piano. And in the piano seat sat, of course.
“Zagreus…?”
Zagreus abruptly stopped the song, again. After a quick pause, he started playing the song’s chorus, again. Thanatos couldn’t tell if it was a greeting gesture or if Zag was lost deep in thought. Than strolled past the coffee table and past the piano. He grabbed a corner chair and yanked it to sit next to Zagreus. When Thanatos settled down, that was when Zagreus spoke.
“Thanatos…! I would invite you in, but you’re already here…!” Zagreus kept his eyes closed as he gently swayed back and forth.
“Zagreus.” Thanatos said in a quiet, yet almost spiteful tone. “It is four in the morning. Why are you down here practicing?”
“Yes, I’m just...just practicing. I have to get-” He stopped and he played again. “It has to be perfect, right? I keep messing up.”
“What do you mean?” Than calmed down a bit, the 4am dread began to weigh on him. “It sounds just fine to me.”
“But it’s okay. I’ll keep going, and maybe everything will be alright.”
“What do you mean?” Than repeated. “Please...you can tell me.”
Zagreus gave a sigh before he tried to confess. “You...Right before you came home today, Father tore into me. It’s fine though, I’m too clumsy for my own good. Too...too clumsy.” Stop. Again. “Do you hate me?”
“I could never bring myself to hate you. Why would you ask such a thing?”
“Ah-” Stop. Again. “Honestly, if you heard what I said to Megaera recently...you would hate me too.”
Oh...What happened while Than was away? Was Meg and Zag’s relationship always this shaky? Was the writing on the wall and Than never took a moment to look? They seemed to be just fine last week. Than cut his sentence short with a gasp. Zagreus lifted his right hand while he continued to play with the left. Bruised, trembling fingertips brushed the radiant name embedded into the piano: Persephone.
“This was my mother's piano…” Zagreus’ voice grew shaky as he brought his hand back down to play normally. “But...you already knew that.”
Thanatos didn’t know., actually. Zagreus continued.
“According to Father, she left us behind to pursue a music career, traveling the world with a keyboard under her arms and a big smile on her face.” Stop. Again. “I was only a couple of months old when she pursued her journey. When I first asked about my mother, that’s what he told me and lectured about how her lifestyle was no life to live. Not for me. He called me an heir, especially when we started training for our families’ companies…”
Thanatos remembered some of those details, but he didn’t remember Persephone leaving joyously. On the other hand, he wished that he was able to help Zagreus catch up during their training throughout their college years. It all happened so fast, which unintentionally hindered Thanatos’ social life a bit. Sure, he would hang out with Zagreus whenever he could, but not without poking at a massive keyboard. Not to mention all of the extracurriculars he had to balance, none of them had Zag as a member.
“You’re so talented, Thanatos. Ah, to be more like you-” Stop. Again. “Keeping up under your mother’s wing. Taking the opportunities given to you and running with them until they become these astounding achievements. All your loved ones beside you, supporting you every step of the way. Level headed, attractive, intimidating. To be...more like you…But I’m stuck here...at this piano.” Stop. Again. “Can’t even get a note right.” Stop. Again.
Thanatos had never heard Zagreus say such diminishing words. Ever. Than couldn’t tell what was keeping him so quiet. Was it the dreariness of his lack of sleep or was it the sting of sadness crawling at his chest. He stared at Zag’s dazed face and traced his eyes down the black haired man’s body until he reached the fingers, poking at the piano. They moved slowly, shivering stiffly to the chill air.
“You look weary, Zagreus.” Thanatos glanced back up to Zag’s eyes. “Have you eaten today?”
Zagreus didn’t say anything, not for a while. He slowly moved his head so his dull, broken eyes met with Than’s concerned ones.
“Do you remember this song, Than?” Zag avoided the question, sending a confirmation towards Than. A pathetic smile grew on his face before he stared at the piano again. “It’s been years since we sang together, let alone this song...I hardly remember the words myself.”
As Zagreus fell silent to play the song again, Thanatos began to remember the melody. Zag began to hum, his voice sounded as if he was holding back tears.
“...............Sing me to sleep, Lullaby of the Leaves…………...Sing...me...to...sleep………………..”
“Stop.” Thanatos reached out his hand to grab Zagreus’ left one. Zag was always known for being a furnace, so Than was a little taken aback when he met ice cold, bruised hands. Zag looked at Than with a confused, pleading face. “Practicing this much, this late into the night is not good for you.”
Zagreus pulled back the best he could. His face dropped. Than could only pull his hand again. Zagreus looked down upon his piano once more and gave a weak chuckle.
“Don’t say it.” He felt like he had this conversation before.
“But…what would she think of me now…Mrs. Eurydice…what would she think?”
Thanatos paused for a moment before he spoke again. “She…she would be proud of you, since you kept practicing after all this time. But she’d scold you for practicing this late. That I’m sure of.”
“...Maybe she would’ve stayed, if…if I…” Zagreus mumbled the last part of that sentence under his breath. He could have done better to help everyone stay, or so he believed. Thanatos felt his heart pound in his chest.
“I never left you. I never did.”
“I-I know you didn’t…” Zagreus stuttered, “It’s just-...I just-”
“Come on.” Thanatos pulled again, this time, Zagreus rose to his feet. “I’ll make you some soup and then you can rest...and you can….you can practice all you want tomorrow.”
“Than…” Zagreus choked for a moment, but Than could not wait any longer. He led Zagreus out of the piano room and into the warm kitchen.
Zagreus quietly sat down at the table when Thanatos released him. Than grabbed a pot to start boiling water, then he ripped a pack of ramen open, he didn’t feel like cooking anything else. Zag tried to warm up his hands to no avail. He should be practicing, he played horribly the past couple of times. But when Than is like this, he won’t take no for an answer. But...
“I...I don’t…” Zag said, part of him didn’t want to be heard.
“You can practice tomorrow.” Than replied dismissively.
“No, I…I won’t stop thinking about…No…if I let my mind wonder, will I-”
“Then how about we stay in the guest room together? Just like old times. Back when I stayed over just for the fun of it.” Than grabbed a bowl and poured the soup into it. Then, he quickly cleaned the pot and left it out to dry. He stuck a spoon for the bowl and two cups to fill with water. He gave one cup to Zagreus and carried the other along with the bowl. “Let’s go upstairs. We don’t want to wake Dusa or your Father.”
Zagreus silently obliged and they made their way back up the stairs and into the guest room. Than set the ramen bowl down on the desk and switched on the desk lamp before he sat on the bed, setting his own water on the nightstand. The smell of food made Zagreus’ stomach roar, and it screeched when he swallowed his first spoonful of noodles. It hurt, but he had to keep eating. He skipped breakfast that morning, he had no time. His father’s scorn is a lot more terrifying. But it didn’t matter, since Zag would have gotten yelled at anyway. It happened during lunch time…the shouting. Then Zag didn’t bother to eat dinner. All he cared about was finding something to escape with. Something to relieve him from this wretched place he called home. So he scarfed down the noodles, the cold and dread that held him captive had finally let him go. His body grew heavy, the weariness finally kicked in. He drank the last of his water and picked up the bowl and cup when he was done.
“Just leave it for now. Come get some rest. We’ll deal with it in the morning.” Than drank his water in one gulp before kicking off his slippers and finally lying on his back. He groaned, deep in thought. He went deeper into his head once the room went dark once again. At that moment, a blunt idea sparked in his head. The thought kept going and going until he felt the weight of the bed shift when Zag tucked himself in.
“I’m sorry I had to put you through all of this, Than.” Zag truly felt guilty, he gripped the sheets as he spoke.
“Please, Zag. We’ve been close for years now. Caring for you is the bare minimum at this point.”
“…You’re too kind to me…really.”
“Hm…” Than’s thoughts boiled into a curiosity, then it boiled into words. “Hey Zag, what do you do on Saturdays?”
“Oh, um…” That question almost felt like Than spoke about a touchy subject. “I would intern under father all day, but because of…well…the fight we had earlier, all of my Saturdays opened up.”
“At least you've got some free time now…though…we should probably get some rest. I really want to sleep in today. Goodnight, Zagreus.”
“Goodnight, Than.”
Thanatos eventually tucked himself into the spacious guest bed and the room soon fell silent once again. Thanatos closed his eyes, but his mind kept going. He couldn’t stop thinking about this cursed plan that struck him at the worst time. His throat was wet and his lips were soft and plump. His breathing was smooth and Zagreus kept the bed sheets warm. It was quiet. Peaceful. But his mind kept going. He tossed and turned trying to clear his mind, but that only made the thoughts in his head louder. Thanatos sighed gently as he shot his eyes open one last time.
Thanatos is about to do something really idiotic.