Chapter Text
The night went by as usual; dinner followed by talking beside the fireplace, and then getting ready for bed and laying in each other’s arms, falling asleep that way, cuddling and safe in the warmth of the other.
In the morning, Billy wakes up at the crack of dawn to the sounds of what he assumes to be people decorating for the party. He groans in annoyance at his sleep being interrupted, and reaches for Cole, since for whatever reason he isn’t in his arms, only to grip the empty sheets instead of the fabric of clothes, much to his disappointment, wishing Cole was still there so he could hold him instead of being by himself.
Billy lays there for a moment, debating on whether or not he should get up. At this point, laying in bed is useless if he doesn’t have Cole next to him. Without his warmth next to him, Billy would rather get up and deal with early morning nonsense than to stay in an empty bed.
So, he does, he gets up and slowly gets ready. It takes way too long for his mind to register that today is the last day of 1899, and he has to prepare for his plans tonight, if he wants them to go well. Actually, he’d prefer it if things went more than well, he’d rather it be perfect.
With that, Billy forces himself to fully wake up, and makes his way over to the dresser, to the bottom drawer. He searches through his things, pushing aside clothes and other belongings before he finds what he’s looking for. His breath hitches when his hands touch it, and he feels an unfamiliar sense of nervousness, something he isn’t quite used to feeling. He thought he would go into this with full confidence, but apparently his brain has other plans.
Billy stares down at the item in his hands, thinking about if he’s really going to do this. He loves Cole, he knows he does, there’s no doubt in his mind, but then there’s the fear that he’ll mess things up. It’s an old fear, one that occasionally comes back to bother him, one that he would like to permanently get rid of. Unfortunately, he cannot, it’s just something that he’ll have to push aside, if he’s to go through with this.
Is he really going to, though? Is this the right time? Is this what he really wants? He promised Cole a lifetime together, but will this truly be part of it? Can this really happen? Will this go well? So many overwhelming questions take over Billy’s thoughts, nearly sending him into a panic.
Before Billy can think over his answer, the door to the room opens, and he finds himself quickly fumbling the object back into place before falling back, startled at the interruption, gazing at the entrance of the room with his eyes widened in shock.
Staring back at him is Cole, one eyebrow raised as he observes Billy. Billy usually isn’t scared so easily, not at someone simply opening a door. It makes Cole think he’s up to something, and he wonders what it is, but decides not to question it, since Billy tends to do odd things as it is. It’s probably nothing, the reason why he’s on the floor. Just Billy being Billy.
“Jumpy this morning, aren’t we?” Cole asks instead, fighting a smile, walking over to his lover. Billy quickly but discreetly kicks the bottom drawer shut before standing, trying to come up some excuse for what he’s doing. He’d hate to ruin the surprise, if there will even be one.
“You just startled me, is all.” Billy mumbles, watching as Cole attempts to walk past him. Out of instinct, he gently grabs Cole’s arm to halt him, a smirk forming on his face before he even speaks. “Aren’t you going to kiss me, since you left me in bed, alone?” Billy teases, like it’s second-nature. It’s the way things are between them, and that’s how they’ll always be.
Cole laughs, internally rolling his eyes at the man who holds his heart. He won’t deny him, though, he never does. Any chance he gets to kiss Billy, he’ll take, not that he ever needs an excuse.
“I guess I can.” Cole leans forward to peck Billy’s lips, a peck that turns into a longer, deeper kiss when Billy grabs Cole’s waist and pulls him close. This is far from an unusual occurrence and yet, the magic remains every time, it’s still what can only be described as the best feeling in the world.
They part after a moment, Billy’s heart skipping a beat when he realizes, all of his internal questions were answered the second Cole’s lips were against his. He wants this, wants Cole, forever and for always, in any way he can have him.
When he looks into Cole’s eyes, watches as his face forms into a soft, familiar smile, and that alone tells him what he’s been longing to know, banishes every concern in his mind. No, he’s going through with his plans for tonight, no matter how nerve-wracking they may be. This, Cole, is his greatest and only desire, and he’ll do whatever it takes to have a future with him.
For now, though, he has to act normal, as normal as someone such as him can be. And that either means going back in for another kiss, or saying something stupid to make Cole laugh.
“It’s not too late to go back to bed, you know.” Is the first thing that Billy thinks of, deciding to turn it into something suggestive instead of what it would be on its own, wiggling his eyebrows obnoxiously as he lets his hands travel beyond Cole’s back. Cole chuckles at his advances, placing his hands on Billy’s chest, shaking his head at him.
“Behave yourself.” Cole playfully pushes Billy away, moving back to the door, to return downstairs. “Come on, we should help get things ready for tonight.” He calls over his shoulder, and Billy can’t help but grin, relieved that Cole can’t see him so he can’t catch on to what he’s got in mind.
“Can’t wait.” Billy murmurs, knowing that Cole can’t hear him. He follows Cole out of the room, to the ballroom (it’s more of a foyer, but tonight it’s a ballroom), barely containing his anxiousness and excitement for the events to come.
It won’t be long, before everything falls into place.
~
As the sun disappears beneath the skyline and the moon rises, Billy’s nerves come back, and it takes everything in him not to make them visible to Cole. Luckily for him, Aunt Jo knows exactly what he’s up to, and is always around the corner to distract Cole whenever Billy becomes extra-shaky. That’s how he usually hides things these days (not that he ever has much to hide, he tells Cole everything), instead of getting angry, how he’s changed.
The guests begin arriving shortly, and Cole stands near the door to wait for Anne and Diana to show up, since they’ve both been invited, along with Prissy and Jane, and whoever they bring along with them. Of course, they see each other often enough, but in the midst of the holidays, they’ve been in Avonlea and him and Billy haven’t gotten a chance to see them, until now.
(Neither of them have set foot in Avonlea since Billy’s wedding, not since their scandal, and it’s probably safer that way. Cole is sure his parents have found out by now, and he’d rather not cross paths with Billy’s father again, so he’s perfectly fine and content with staying in Charlottetown for the rest of his days.)
Billy waits in the corner, heart beating out of his chest because the time for him to act on his wishes grows closer and closer by the hour. He’s nervous, for how this will go, how things will be. After a while, he has to force himself to think of something else, picking the fact that they’re entering a new century. (It’s something that he’s voiced to Cole before, about how it’s a possibility that the world could explode the second 1899 turns into 1900.)
Anne and Diana enter the party a short amount of time later, greeting Josephine before running over to Cole. Cole hugs them both, since he’s missed them, and they hug him back. It’s nice to be able to spend time with them, since they’ve all been so busy and there’s plenty to talk about.
“It’s so nice to see you two again.” Cole says after a minute or so of hugging, breaking away to smile at his two friends. They smile back, excited for the party, because this is exactly where they all belong.
“It’s nice to see you too.” Diana nods, before realizing that Billy isn’t standing next to Cole. Which is strange, because where one is, the other isn’t far behind. They’ve been inseparable ever since they became friends, so long ago. “Where’s your Billy?” Anne questions, realizing that herself.
Cole is aware that it’s weird for Billy to not be at his side, but that doesn’t stop warmth from spreading in his chest when he thinks about the ‘your’ Anne added before Billy’s name. How nice it is to have it said that way, because it’s the truth, Billy is his, and he is Billy’s.
“He’s...somewhere.” Cole shrugs, figuring that’s the case, he’s around. “Probably overthinking the fact that we’re entering a new century.” He cringes at the memory of Billy’s theories of what will happen when the clock strikes midnight, since they’re all very impossible (at least to Cole, who thinks logically unlike his other half), and Cole fails to understand how he’s so mind blown over the simple fact. (He’s sure him and Anne will discuss it, though, resulting in endless ramblings.)
“Oh?” Diana raises an eyebrow, searching for Billy in the crowd of people. She eventually spots him conversing with folks he probably doesn’t know, stifling a giggle at their reactions to whatever it is that he’s telling them. Truthfully, she’d rather not find out.
“He’s convinced the world is going to explode the second we enter 1900.” Cole rolls his eyes, but is unable to fight an amused grin from forming on his face. “He’s insufferable.” Cole remarks, a fact. While he loves Billy more than life itself, sometimes he questions his sanity.
Cole catches up with Anne and Diana, what they did during the holidays and all else. Both women returned to Avonlea to be with their families, while Cole spent them with Billy, which was quite enjoyable. It was their second Christmas while together, but the first that they were able to spend together, doing whatever they pleased. Their days spent together couldn’t be more wonderful.
Anne and Diana leave to go speak to Billy and other guests, while Cole remains at the door, now waiting for Jane and Prissy. He’s become close with them both in the past months, going with Billy to meet up with them on several occasions. (He’s practically married to Billy at this point, and wishes he could really be, so it’s only fitting that he gets along with his sisters, who accept them for who they are.)
Jane and Prissy never show up late to events like Billy does, and come in not long after Anne and Diana do. They both smile when they see Cole, happy to see him after the presumably long week they spent in Avonlea with their parents. Cole can only imagine how that went.
“Hello Prissy, Jane.” Cole gives them both a quick hug, only seeing a third figure behind them when he peers over Prissy’s shoulder. To his surprise, their companion is none other than Josie Pye, looking back at him with a half-grin. “Josie.” Cole nods towards her, greeting her as he would with any other guest.
He hadn’t expected seeing her here, in fact, he hadn’t seen her since, well, six months ago, her and Billy’s wedding, a nightmare for the three of them. Cole has nothing against her, of course, it’s far from her fault that her and Billy’s terrible parents made an extreme attempt at ruining their lives, it’s just slightly surprising. Either way, he’s glad she seems happy now, as are him and Billy.
“Hello Cole.” Josie nods back, shifting closer to Jane. Cole’s gaze flickers down to their shared hands for a moment, before glancing back up, smiling to himself and not taken aback in the slightest. “Where’s our brother at?” Jane asks, and before Cole can get an answer, Billy appears beside him.
“Prissy! Jane!” Billy wraps his arms around them both at the same time, not even bothering to contain his joy at seeing his sisters. “I’m glad you guys could make it.” He says, none of them breaking the hug just yet, since he’s missed them. He notices Josie behind them, and lightly smiles, one in which she returns, a remembrance of their shared misery in their forced betrothal.
No matter, they’re free now, both of them. Josie is happy with Jane (they told him they were together months ago, and he was proud of them for being brave enough to do so), and Billy? His life with Cole is amazing, much more than he could’ve ever hoped for.
“I’ll let you catch up.” Josie says, placing a hand on Jane’s back before walking towards Diana and Anne. Cole does the same, giving them a moment to discuss things.
“Of course we did.” Prissy is the first to respond, the three of them pulling away to face each other. “We needed a party after spending Christmas with father.” Jane adds, a hint of hesitation in her voice. It’s all a distant memory now, what occurred the day that Billy revealed his relationship to Cole to their father, so Billy isn’t phased at her bringing him up.
But still, he scoffs, imagining the horrid things he’s certain his father says about him. To his business partners, his accomplices, their family, anyone who it comes up with (if he recalls correctly, the last time his father was ever brought up in a conversation is when Prissy mentioned he made an off-handed comment about how it’s apparently a tradition for his children to run away at the alter, the bastard). And the thing is, Billy couldn’t care less. He’s free of him now, and won’t be burdened with his influence any longer. He’s free now, free to be who he is without any fear.
“Right.” Billy pauses, thinking of a member of their family who hadn’t been brought up just yet. “How is mother?” He wonders. Billy still cares for her, he does, even if she’s ashamed of him. No matter how she feels about him, she’d never treat him the way his father did. Of course, she didn’t stand up for him, but at least she didn’t hit him, not like his father did.
“She’s fine. I believe she misses you.” Prissy replies after a moment, dryly. “Father is still the same.” Oh, Billy’s sure of it, which is why he didn’t even bother to ask. He can hear it plainly, his father complaining about his ‘scandalous’ behavior, whining about how his only son is a useless disappointment that’s going to burn in the deepest layer of hell.
Billy doesn’t mind, though. His father can think whatever he wants, he’s not Billy’s problem anymore. In fact, he could go his entire life without ever seeing that man again. Cole is his family now, and Billy doesn’t need anything else.
“Well, what can you expect from that old man?” Billy laughs, dismissing thoughts of his father. That’s the past now, and he’s rather focus on his present, and his future, one that he wants. One that he will have, if he does what he has planned tonight.
Right, that. All at once, Billy becomes anxious again, heart picking up its pace, realizing that the time is approaching.
He eyes Cole from across the room, admiring as he laughs at something Anne says. He’s beautiful, the best thing Billy’s ever laid eyes on, and Billy would be awfully lucky if Cole would accept what he offers, if it is what he wants.
There’s only one way to find out.
Billy doesn’t make his move just yet, he stays put. He watches as the dancing starts, and Cole escorts Diana to the dance floor, and they dance, and they appear to have fun. Cole looks happy, and that’s something Billy loves to see.
Somehow, he ends up in a conversation with Anne, who hasn’t joined in on the dancing just yet. They speak of the usual occurrences, only this time, Billy’s only half-listening. It’s hard to focus on anything else when what he’s thinking of is such a big step. Then, Anne brings up something in her rant that catches his attention.
“Do you have any hopes for the next century, Billy?” Oh, does he. He has a lot, ones he didn’t think were possible to fulfill until recently. “I for one, hope corsets go out of style. They’re terribly uncomfortable.” Anne scowls, and Billy doesn’t know how to respond, he can’t speak on that (but figures that’s correct, she would know) but he does know what the answer to her question would be.
Now, Billy is well aware that he has to be cautious about what he tells Anne, since she isn’t the best at keeping secrets, but he thinks he’ll need her opinion of this, it’ll be one that he values, one that will surely help him in this ordeal.
“Well, there’s this one thing I want, badly.” Billy mutters it so quietly that Anne barely hears it, but she does, and she gestures for Billy to elaborate on just what he means. He can’t form the words, but he can show her. “I’ll show you.” Billy reaches into his pocket, reaching for the small box he shoved into there when he slipped away to his and Cole’s room earlier, to retrieve it. Anne stares at it with plain curiosity, and Billy takes a deep breath, opening it with a single flick of his thumb.
Anne nearly yelps in surprise when she sees what the box contains, covering her mouth in shock. Then, the look in her eyes changes into excitement, and then she’s throwing her arms around Billy, like she understands exactly what he wants to do. “Billy, that’s amazing!” She exclaims, and Billy can’t see what’s in her head, but he knows her well enough to catch on that she’s imagining what he’s going to do, and the thought alone nearly makes her squeal with glee.
But, is it really amazing? Of course, to Anne, the thought of two of her closet friends partaking in something more than an official, ‘real’ marriage seems like a dream come true, but Billy still finds himself questioning whether or not it’s worth it, to do otherwise.
“I hope so. I don’t know, is it a stupid idea? I mean, we can’t-...” Billy trails off, pulling away, because Anne gets what he’s implying. She stares at him for a moment, no sign of sympathy in her features. Instead, she smiles, maybe the widest one that Billy has ever seen.
“It doesn’t matter. This does not have to be a marriage, but a love bond, any two people can have it.” Anne tells him, the complete truth of how she feels, how things should be. A love bond sounds much greater than just a simple marriage, more meaningful and much more romantic. “You will be life mates.” A better thing to call one than ‘husband’ or ‘wife’, surely.
Billy pictures it for a moment, thinks of how life will be. Him and Cole don’t need a marriage by the court to declare their love, when they can have something so much better, a bond. They can marry in their own way, the two of them, two souls connected in every way possible. All Billy has to do is ask, ask Cole to love and be devoted to him for eternity.
“I like how that sounds.” Billy says, closing the box and putting it back in his pocket, anticipating bringing it out again later. “So, I should do it, then?” His heart skips a beat, imagining getting down on one knee, asking Cole to be his, forever. Soon, soon he’ll be doing it, he won’t wait any longer. This is what he wants.
“I believe with all of my heart that you should.” By the tone of Anne’s voice, Billy knows she’s being fully honest. If Anne didn’t believe that Billy and Cole were right for each other, were soulmates, she’d say so, she wouldn’t be agreeing that Billy is doing a good thing. Billy and Cole are in love, and that’s enough.
“I was going to-...tonight. I’m kind of nervous.” Billy admits, easily, since Anne is his friend and he has nothing to be ashamed of. And, it’s perfectly normal to be nervous, he’s going to ask the man he loves to be his forever, that’s a big deal.
“Oh, Billy, I’m certain Cole loves you more than anything else in this entire world. You have no reason to be.” With that, Billy’s nerves go down, just a little bit. He’s sure they’ll return later, but for now, Billy wants to enjoy the party, the last hour or so of 1899, the most memorable year of his life. And with Cole, there would certainly be more to come.
Anne and Cole join Billy and Diana by the refreshment table, where they’re chatting and enjoying the night. Billy scans the crowd for his sisters, grinning when he sees Jane and Josie dancing, because they can. There’s no worries here, none at all. Billy could go and dance with Cole if he wanted to, even if he’s terrible at it. Cole won’t mind too much.
Last time Cole attended one of Aunt Jo’s parties, he never imagined he’d ever feel so comfortable with who he is, as loved as he is now, he never thought he’d have someone to dance with. Back then he was afraid, uncertain of who he was. Things aren’t like they were then, Cole isn’t miserable, he’s the happiest he’s ever been, he knows who he is. He doesn’t despise Billy anymore, Billy is the love of his life.
No matter how absurd he may be at times, including when he says, as if on cue, “What if the world explodes?” And smirks, like he’s just bringing his odd theory up again to annoy Cole, like it’s his job.
“Billy, stop talking.” Cole playfully rolls his eyes, which only encourages Billy more.
“Imagine everyone’s celebrating as the clock strikes midnight, and then the whole world just blows up.” Billy continues as he slides in closer to Cole, putting an arm around his waist as if he were saying something romantic, instead of that. Cole allows it, though, since he simply can’t resist a touch from Billy.
“I honestly don’t know how I put up with you.” Cole says it with such fondness, that it’s frankly obvious to anyone there that he knows exactly why, because he’s in love.
The smug look on Billy’s face only grows deeper, and he leans in, cupping the side of Cole’s face opposite to him and planting a kiss onto to the nearer cheek, like it’s an obligation to kiss Cole any time he has a chance to. And truthfully, Billy wouldn’t mind if it was.
“Because you love me, that’s why.” Billy nearly whispers, knowing if he speaks too loud his current emotions will be clear. Not that he wants to hide them, he never does anymore, but he refuses to ruin his own plans by getting choked up without even speaking.
“Well, I do love you.” Cole agrees, and Billy feels the same as he did when he first realized his feelings; nervous and overwhelmed and yet, over the moon. “A lot.” Cole adds, moving to stand in front of Billy, pecking his lips.
Billy gazes into Cole’s eyes for a moment, every ounce of love he feels for him out there, for anyone to see. And he wants them to see, wants everyone in the room to know that Cole is his, and he is Cole’s, and by tonight, maybe it’ll be written in the stars that it’ll always be that way.
“Dance with me, then.” Billy requests, grabbing Cole’s hand and bringing it up to his lips, pressing a kiss there before intertwining their fingers.
“Sure, just don’t trip.” Cole can’t help but tease, since he’s aware of Billy’s lack of dancing skills. But, Billy’s been attempting to practice the waltz, so he’ll be decent, at least.
He keeps his hand in Cole’s as they make their way to the center of the dance floor, seeing other couples like them around, free and glad to be able to be together at an event like this. And that’s how it can be, that’s how it should be.
They stop walking just as the next piece of music begins playing, and Billy doesn’t let go of Cole’s hand, and gets them in what he believes to be the correct position for the waltz. When they start swaying, he looks into Cole’s eyes. They seemed glossed over, like he’s in some sort of a trance, like in this very second, it’s only him and Billy, Billy is his entire world
(It’s all in the eyes, he was once told, it’s always in the eyes.)
Billy finds himself zoning out as well, focusing on nothing but Cole, the love of his life standing in front of him, hand in his. The music, along with everyone else in the room, becomes distorted. It’s just them, the two of them, alone.
He never thought it could be like this. He never thought he’d be able to dance with Cole, hold him close, in front of everyone. All he had to do was to allow himself to feel things, and he’d find people to trust, he’d be able to be himself in a safe place. While he wishes it were that way from the start, it’s all over now, there was no need to dwell on the past.
Cole was here with him now, in his arms, and they’re happy. Every moment led them to this, led them here. Every look, every smile, every word, every kiss, every touch, every decision they made, brought them here.
The past two and a half years flash through Billy’s mind. The day he and Cole met, how smitten he was and how stupid he was to not realize it then. Every cruel, idiotic thing he did after to repress his emotions farther. Every ounce of remorse, and guilt he felt for doing so. Their fight. Cole’s words to him after, the words that informed him of the extent of his actions, how awful he was, his inspiration to change. His apology to Cole, them becoming friends. The months after, them growing close, getting to know who the other really was, and embracing that. The refusal to deny feelings for any longer. Their first kiss. The fear that followed, not of anyone finding out, but of Billy not being worthy. But Cole knowing and trusting that now, he was, and he only continued to prove it.
The night they became a couple, partners. The entire year that came after, full of love and understanding that grew even stronger. Days spent together, sneaking off to the room to share sacred moments of kissing, talking, laughing, everything in between. Nights spent huddling up in the clubhouse, warm and content in the other’s arms.
Then, everything crashing down, their loyalty and love being tested with a choice that wasn’t supposed to be theirs. A short time of pain, and longing, and pining. It all coming down to a choice, of bravery being tested. A decision that Billy had to make that was oh, so easy, he didn’t understand why he didn’t make it in the first place. He took a chance, stood up to his father and ran away to what, to who, he really wants. He got the life he desired, he got his happiness. His happiness was, is Cole.
The past six months, freedom and a bond that only grew, with being able to be who they are without any fears and doubts. A love that only grew stronger.
They’ve been through a lot, that being an understatement. Cole made Billy want to be a better man, made him want to change, and that’s what he did. He’s in love, and Billy won’t deny it any longer. Their past, the painful moments included, was fixed, was gone. Their present was beautiful, and their future would be as well, if they let it.
Billy never thought he’d love anyone this much. But he does, he loves Cole. More dearly and deeply than anything else. And he’ll have him, he’ll be with him, for the rest of his life.
“Cole.” The music ends just in time, and Billy stops dancing, but keeps his hand firmly intertwined with Cole’s. Gazes into his eyes, the ones he’s grown so fond of. “Marry me.” He says, voice almost in a whisper, but filled with so much emotion that it’s clear, he wants this.
Cole’s lips slightly part in shock, because to him, that came out of nowhere. He knows so, so well that Billy loves him, but, oh, wow.
“What?” Is all Cole manages to say, the mere thought that they can (and they will) being unbelievable. Can they?
Billy knows, they both know, they can’t be married according to the law. But the law is wrong, and they’re already breaking it. Society will never approve of them, but that doesn’t matter. They can be married in their own right, without a certificate. Like Anne said, instead of a marriage, it will be a love bond that only requires the binding of their souls, it’s one in the same.
“Marry me.” Billy repeats, taking Cole’s other hand, holding them both to his lips, kissing his knuckles. “I know we can’t, according to the law, but in every other way, we can.” He goes on, explaining how they can, even if Cole already knows. As smart as he is, he more than likely figured it out. “The law is wrong. I love you and you love me back, and that’s enough. We can be life mates without a useless certificate.” Billy takes a deep breath, preparing to pour out every emotion he has. He wants this to be perfect, because Cole deserves nothing less.
“Billy, I-...” Cole trails off as Billy gets down on one knee, still holding his hands. He isn’t sure how to react. All he knows is that, he’s all for this, he always has been.
Now, Billy is aware that this is unlike anything he’s ever been taught, but he chooses to keep the classic custom of getting down on one knee, but decides he should tell Cole everything he feels, if he’s even capable of putting that into words. He’ll try, he’ll try to make this as special as Cole is.
“I love you.” Is what Billy starts with, because there is nothing more true. “There will never be a place, a world, where I do not love you. One where you are not my everything.” He goes on, trying to hide the trembling in his voice, the rapid beating of his heart, the blush forming on his cheeks. He can’t help it, Cole has this effect on him, especially in a moment as meaningful as this. “I love you more than any wealth or riches I could ever have. I love you more than life itself.” Billy says what he’s been thinking, been feeling, this entire time. He’s being completely honest here, and while he isn’t great with words, he makes himself be, just this once.
He can feel Cole’s hands shaking in his own, and he squeezes them, an action that’s always been a way of comfort with them, one that expresses his feelings when words won’t suffice. The thing is, now, they do. Billy means every word that leaves his lips, with every fiber in his being. He’s never said words full of such raw passion, or earnest, or been so open, even after all this time.
Now, he is. He’s allowed to express how he feels towards Cole, in every way he can. He’s allowed to ask him to go into this, this love bond, with him. He’s allowed to be happy. They, together, are allowed to be happy.
“You changed me. You made me want to be better. Cole, I had no idea what love was when I met you. I had no clue what it meant to be a good person. I was so stupid, and you proved me wrong.” Billy could go on and on for hours about how Cole changed him, how Cole showed him how great life could be if he did the right thing, but settles for that, moves on to just how he loves him. “I couldn’t imagine my life any other way but with you by my side. I love you so much, and I’ll do whatever I can to show it. That’s a promise.” And Billy doesn’t break his promises, not these days. To Cole, he’ll be loyal and devoted to, he’ll love and cherish him, for the rest of his days. Through all they’ve faced, Cole is his constant, and with this it will stay that way.
“There was once a time where I thought we couldn’t be together, but I was wrong. You and me, we can be happy. We can be together until death do us part.” It’s then that Billy opens the box. It’s a nice ring, but it doesn’t matter how much it costs. To Billy, Cole is priceless, and he bought it because he loves him, and wants to marry him. It’s but a simple symbol of this promise that they’ll make to each other, if Cole accepts his proposal. Since, that’s what it is. “I want to spend the rest of my life with you, if you’ll have me.” Is what Billy concludes his not-at-all-planned speech with, because that was spoken straight from the heart.
Billy takes a moment to observe Cole’s reaction. He looks stunned, and flattered, like he’s processing everything that Billy just said, what he just asked. If Cole accepts, this takes them to the next level. More than lovers, but something like marriage, but is much better. Much more meaningful.
Cole stares down at Billy, watches as he bites his lips anxiously. Cole has nothing to consider, he knows his answer, knows what he wants. What he wants is Billy, and a life, a future, with him. And adding a marriage (or a love bond) to that would be divine, would be everything he ever desired and so much more.
“Of course I will.” Cole nearly chokes out, so emotional from this. From knowing that he’s loved, cherished, and the love of his life, the ideal of his dreams, wants to be with him forever. “I love you.” Cole shudders as Billy slides the ring on his finger, the other man quivering with emotion as well, the realization that this is real, this is happening, hitting him like a train (but in the good way). “I love you.” Cole repeats as Billy stands up, scooping Cole into his arms in an instant. Cole holds onto him tight, clutching the back of Billy’s tux as he buries his face into Billy’s shoulder, his arms around him being the only thing keeping him grounded.
Billy keeps his arms locked firmed around Cole’s waist, wanting to examine the ring on his finger but also, never wanting to let him go. Never wanting Cole to leave his arms.
But, it happened. He did it. Cole wants to marry him, strengthen their love bond. Wants to have a future with him, wants to spend their life together. Free, and happy.
“So, you’re marrying me?” Billy asks, staring at the ring on Cole’s finger in awe. Cole gazes at it too, feeling so surreal that it’s there. “I guess I did okay with my little speech, then.” Billy mumbles the last part, ignoring the chuckle Cole gives in response. He expects Cole to come back with a teasing remark as he always does, but also isn’t surprised when Cole enters his arms once more, clinging to him, not releasing his grip or even loosening it in the slightest. No, because now, at this very moment, he isn’t capable of letting Billy go.
“I am.” Cole squeezes Billy impossibly tighter, laughing as he confirms it. “Yes.” Cole says it like he’s so sure, like this is exactly what he wanted, that Billy finds himself shaking in his arms. This was real, this was a dream come true, and Billy couldn’t ask for anything more.
“That’s-...that’s great.” Billy pulls slightly away, his hands still on Cole’s hips, only wanting to see his face, the one he’s grown so fond with over the years, since they’ve met. “I love you.” The words leave Billy’s lips naturally, like he was meant to say them. He makes sure to say those three special words everyday, and to show it, so Cole knows, just how much he cares for him.
And Cole knows, oh, does he know. Because he feels the same way, cares for Billy just as much. He’s building a life with him, a future, one that could only turn out amazing.
“I love you too. You have no idea how much.” Cole whispers, gently kissing Billy’s cheek. “You make me the happiest I’ve ever been, Billy. I’ll be glad to spend my life with you.” He kisses Billy’s other cheek, words slurring as he presses their foreheads together. “I promise you, Billy, I’m going to love you until the day I die.” With that, Cole breaks the distance between his and Billy’s lips, kissing him, the best one they’ve ever had in all of the times they’ve kissed.
The kiss is like a breakthrough, every step they’ve made, every choice they’ve made leading up to this, flows through their minds all at once. And it’s almost powerful, as strong as their feelings towards each other after all this time. This was meant to happen, everything that happened led them here. Led them to this.
Right as the kiss deepens, Cole melting into Billy’s arms as Billy’s grip on him tightens, the sound of a clock striking sounds through the room, meaning, it’s 1900. The end of a year spent together, and the start of another.
Billy waits a few seconds, breaking the kiss and looking around. The world was still in one piece, nothing was blowing up, they were fine, they were in a new century. He had all the time in the world to marry Cole, to have a life with him, and he didn’t want to waste a moment, didn’t want to miss a thing.
“Well, the world didn’t blow up.” He can’t help but comment, earning an eye-roll from Cole, as expected. “And I’m glad, because that means I get to marry you.” Billy adds, the usual sweet compliment to make Cole blush, to take away from whatever dumb thing he said before.
As always, Cole indulges him, god knows how he puts up with it, and kisses him again, laughing in their shared space, foreheads pressed together.
“You’re ridiculous, Billy Andrews.” Cole says it less like an insult, and more like some type of romantic confession. It’s another affectionate pet name for him, at this point.
“And you’re wonderful, Cole Mackenzie.” Billy retorts, smirking. “I guess we'll share a last name eventually.” He murmurs, but loud enough for Cole to hear it.
A love bond is the same as a marriage, but more meaningful, Billy supposes, so that means that maybe, they’ll share a last name, at least in their hearts. Which, is what matters. Whatever they do, all that matters is how they see themselves, as one.
Now, Cole is used to Billy’s relentless attempts to flatter him, but this has him turning a bright shade of red, cheeks heating him. So much that he finds himself back into Billy’s arms, nuzzling into his neck as Billy hugs him back, leaning up to press kisses into his hair.
Billy hates to think what might’ve been, if he never tried to fix things. If he had given into fear, and kept his regrets to himself. He’s glad he followed Cole into the woods and talked to him, he highly doubts they’d be here now if he didn’t. He doubts he’d be this happy. The weary days and lonely nights, though, are easy to forget, since they’re here, together.
Cole, on the other hand, always had the feeling deep down that things would work out. Of course, he hadn’t expected it to be like this, to fall for Billy this hard. Never expected they’d run away together, plan a life together, but they did, and he’s thankful for that. Thankful that they were able to work things out, come this far, get through what they did, all of it.
Here they are. After all this time, here they are.
“I didn’t think I could love you more.” Cole mutters, lips trailing along Billy’s skin. “But here we are.” He laughs, tears of joy welling up in his eyes. They’ve come so far, and they deserve every piece of happiness they’ve felt over the years. They deserve to be here now, together, no doubt about it.
Billy places a hand on the back of Cole’s neck, hands combing through his hair, using his other hand to cup Cole’s cheek. He lightly brushes his lips against Cole’s, kissing him because he just can’t seem to get enough of him. He just can’t seem to shake the thought that, wow, they made it, they made it so far.
“Here we are.” Billy agrees, closing his eyes as he leans his forehead against Cole’s. Letting himself believe that this is real. This is the feeling, the love he’s been hearing about. The one that’s going to last a lifetime, because neither Billy or Cole can see it any other way, without each other. And it never had to be that way, they never had to be alone, because they were free.
They found what they wanted, what they needed, together. It wasn’t always easy, wasn’t always simple, but they’ve come a long way. And they were going to continue to grow, as individuals, and as life-mates. One glance at their path in years to come, and they see one thing; them, together, a life of no regrets.