Chapter Text
I open my eyes. We're in the front room with bean bags and couches sprawled everywhere. Karkat is clinging onto my arm, looking pale and shaking. It reeks of juggalo scum.
Gamzee turns to me immediately, eyes wild and pin already in the air. He's still too slow. I shoot my other arm out to the side, my fingers tingling as I find the same chains that held him prisoner in the fridge. They come to me, hitting Gamzee in the side of the head and sending him tumbling to the ground.
Karkat's screaming. Dave is yelling. Cole rushes to my side but I can't hear him. I'm glowing white hot with god tier--my god tier.
Gamzee snarls at me. I clench my fist and watch as the chains wrap around him and pin his arms to his side. I lean down and lock eyes with him. He's stoic, but his eyes tell the story that he doesn't want to be heard. He's shocked, angry, confused--and scared.
"This time, you are trapped."
Gamzee curls his lip and a low growl bubbles from his chest. Cole takes this moment to kick him.
I turn to Cole and take one of his hands, squeezing it. "I'm fine." I reassure and I can physically see him relax. "Karkat and I got out before he could land a hit." Suddenly self-conscious, I turn to Dave and give him a weak smile. "Sorry about that, by the way. That was accidental."
Dave shakes his head, waving his hand in dismissal. "No worries. You're apparently way more powerful than any of us. It's cool to be on the receiving end of some awesome shit like that."
"I mean--she did have Yaldabaoth." Cole points out.
"You had fucking Yaldabaoth?" Sollux's jaw is on the floor and I nod.
Gamzee cranes his neck to look at Equius, who's now standing in the doorway with Nepeta at his feet. He grins. "Hey, Equius. My motherfucking hemobro. Can you do me a favor?"
Equius's cheeks lightly turn blue as he begins to sweat. "Is this an order, highblood?" I roll my eyes. What a fucking joke.
"Get these fucking chains off of me."
Equius starts to advance to follow the order, but Nepeta wraps herself around his ankle and holds him back. "Don't, Equi-hiss! He was clearly put in those chains fur a reason!"
I move to stand between the simp and the juggalo. "With all due respect, Mr. Zahhak, if you take those chains off of him I'll knock the shit out of you. He just tried to kill me and Karkat so he's chained up for good reason. Got it?"
Gamzee emits another growl and mumbles: "I wouldn't kill my best friend." Cole kicks him in the side again.
Equius is now sweating profusely. Eridan, in the corner, is staring at me in bewilderment. "And--who are you--" Equius is trying to find the words. "Gamzee Makara is a highblood and needs to be protected." He casts a wary glance down at Nepeta who is chewing on his leg at this point. "...But since Nepeta seems to agree, I will oblige to your... orders."
Karkat groans and rolls his eyes. "Equius, stop being a freak, that is a friendly request!"
Eridan barks out a laugh and immediately sidles up beside me. "Ignore Equius, he's just a fuckin' freak, he won't do anyfin." I give him a side eye and he backs off.
"THAT'S AN ORDER EQUI--mmph!" I cut off Gamzee's scream by ripping off my sock and stuffing it into his mouth. I kick it further down his throat, gagging him.
"Do me a favor. Shut. Up."
"So, is there anywhere we can hide this shitty clown at?" Cole gives a strange glance to Gamzee. "Or are we just gonna... leave him here in time out?"
"Well, as long as he has a sock in his mouth, he could just be, like, an alternate timeline bearskin rug." Dave offers.
"Are we sure it's safe for him to be around people?" Eridan has crossed one arm across his stomach, propping his other elbow on his hand.
"No, but we don't exactly have any fucking slime, do we?" Karkat shoots a glare at Eridan before sitting down on the floor next to Gamzee, gently shushing him and patting his shoulder like he did to me.
I raise an eyebrow at this. "You know, all I'd need is a small sample of that slime shit and a chemistry lab. I should be able to synthesize some for you guys."
"You're a chemist?" Aradia asks, her eyes widening.
I shrug. "Not legally, but five years on a dead planet allows you some hobbies."
Dirk nods. He's unusually tense. "I get you. My session was also dead."
"Our recouperacoons are literally made of the shit," Sollux scoffs. "There's so much potential for samples."
"Is there a chemistry lab on this thing?" I ask.
Aradia shakes her head. "Unfortunately no. But we could put one together if we needed to."
"That would be perfect."
"What equipment do you need?" Karkat looks back up at me. I notice that his hands are still shaking ever so slightly. "We can alchemize it. We basically have unlimited grist out here."
"I'll need time to get a list together. Can he stay tied up like that on the floor for a bit?"
Gamzee gags slightly on the sock in his mouth as he suddenly cries out in protest, thrashing against the chains. I clench my fist and watch as the chains tighten, limiting any and all movement.
"That's one vote for yes."
"I vote we throw him off the ship." Cole says coldly, briefly pausing his conversation with Nepeta.
Karkat snaps his head towards Cole, his eyes wild. "We are not throwing him off the ship."
Eridan groans, rolling his eyes dramatically. "Well why not?"
Sollux elbows Eridan hard in the ribs. "Because it's safer if he's here, fishdick!" Eridan snaps his head at Sollux, scandalized. "If we dump him on some fucking planet then he could fucking massacre the entire world and then come back to kill us!"
"Sollux is right," Dirk says firmly. "This is our best option. Keep him tied up or sedated. The fridge clearly didn't work."
"So he stays here." I glare down at Gamzee. He returns the gaze. "Chained up and within our line of sight."
"Will he get out again?" Terezi asks, her voice shaking.
I set my jaw. "Trust me. Those chains aren't going anywhere unless I decide they are."
"They better not!" Eridan gasps. "I cannot afford to die again, I barely got out! I'm o-fish-ally out of lives!"
Sollux's lip curls. "Too bad you can't drop dead right now."
Eridan sighs and flutters his eyelashes at Sollux. "Oh, Sol. I love it when you talk black to me."
Sollux grits his teeth, planting his feet and scowling at him. "I will fucking kill you!" From behind his glasses red and blue sparks begin to crackle, bolts of electricity briefly circling the earpieces.
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. I can't deal with this shit right now.
"Stop it." I snap. I turn my head to the two of them, who are now both staring at me in shock. "Both of you. We have enough problems right now." I stare pointedly at Sollux. "I don't need to see your psionics rip anyone else apart, Sollux. Keep your temper under control." He shrinks back, looking down at the ground.
"Eridan," I turn to Eridan who looks even more taken aback than he did ten seconds ago. "Don't antagonize him. Until the current issue is solved, you're either going to sit down and shut up, or you're going to behave."
"I won't kill him this time." Sollux mumbles.
Eridan nods in agreement. "Yes ma'am. I'll stop."
"Good." I say firmly.
Eridan wanders over to the nearest beanbag and sits down, holding the end of his scarf in front of his lap the whole way. Karkat groans and makes a face.
"Eridan, you're fucking disgusting."
Eridan doesn't say anything at this. He just droops his head.
I cross my legs, hovering in one spot in the air while watching Gamzee. He still hasn't taken his eyes off of me. What triggers the change in his head? What is it about the slime that makes him act so differently? Clearly nobody else eats it like he does, so what made him start in the first place? Is it addictive? What if he's experiencing withdrawal symptoms which is making him act--
"Hey."
Cole's voice breaks me from my thoughts. I glance over at him, keeping Gamzee in my peripheral vision. "Hey, you okay?"
Cole chuckles. "I wasn't the one attacked by a seven-foot-tall alien and used my bondage powers on him. Are you okay?"
No. I'm not. I'm terrified that I'm not strong enough to keep him contained for long enough to figure out what makes him tick. If he breaks out, he'll go after me, and then he'll go after everyone else on the ship, taking them out one by one like he did years ago.
Instead of saying all of this, I just shrug. "Fine. I'll have to sit here and keep an eye on him so he doesn't wiggle his way out of these." I nod my head toward Dave, who is just now gaining enough strength to sit up from his place on the couch. "Dave okay?"
He nods. "Yeah, he's fine." Cole's quiet for a moment. "How do you do that? Take someone's aspect."
"I don't know," I say honestly. "I can't control it that well. I know how it feels when it's about to happen, but I can't... make it happen, nor can I stop it from happening."
Distantly I hear Dave and Dirk arguing.
"We should probably figure that out." Cole says quietly.
I nod. "I shouldn't have to do it again for a little bit." I match his volume. "I'm not leaving this spot until we get him calmed down."
Gamzee tries to move again. He curls his lip, trying to speak but gagging on the sock instead. I clench my fist tighter. The chains tighten.
"You know," Cole says gently. "I could always make him... make die, and you can stop mentally freaking the fuck out. Because I know you are."
He's right. I am. I'm literally losing my shit right now because I don't actually know whether or not he's going to get out of those things. I don't actually know if I'm strong enough.
I shrug again. "No. He and Karkat are close. I don't want anyone resenting us more than Dirk already does."
Did I just say that? Dirk resents us?
Cole scoffs. "Dirk is wearing anime sunglasses. He has no room to resent us."
I blink and tilt my head. It's there somewhere. I know it. I can dig around, find the bond between him and his emotions. There's a thread--I can read it, if I can just find the end--
Found it.
"He thinks we're dangerous. He thinks he should have left us in our session. He feels like we're time bombs waiting to kill everyone." I furrow my eyebrows. There's something else, something deeper. "...there's a hint of jealousy at how powerful we both are, I think. That one's more muddled."
Cole purses his lips. He's hurt. I don't need to find his string of thoughts to figure that one out. He laughs, harsh and awkward. "At how powerful you are. He doesn't know what I can do." He shifts. "And frankly, I think it's best if we keep it that way. So we don't actually get kicked out."
If that's how one Strider feels, what about the other? I turn my mind toward Dave, trying to find that thread. I smile slightly. "Dave won't let him. He doesn't think they made a mistake." The word "cool" floats through my head. I nudge Cole. "He thinks you're cool."
Cole blushes bright red and coughs. "Wait--wait, really? He does?"
Whoa. More than cool. This is doodling-in-the-margins type shit. I laugh. "Yeah, really cool."
If Cole gets even redder he'll be a tomato. "Well--uh--I have really good feelings about Karkat!" He waggles his eyebrows.
I try not to blush. Instead, I laugh. "Yeah? How so?"
"That's a secret I'll never tell!" Cole sings, nudging me. "You should totally smooch him eventually, though."
I laugh again. The smile is quickly wiped off of my face when I hear a growl bubble up from Gamzee's sock-filled-face. I immediately turn and stare back down at him. He doesn't flinch.
Cole follows my gaze, crouching down and speaking softly. "It's okay to let your friend have other friends, or even relationships. If they're true friends they'll stick by you, no matter what. Being mad and attacking people isn't going to do anything besides drive them away."
"I wouldn't engage him." My voice is cold. I don't mean for it to be.
Gamzee doesn't try to respond. He just stares at Cole for a few seconds. His scleras turn red. He grins.
"For that reason."
Cole gives me a look that only Heart players can master. Full of a deep understanding of every emotion besides their own. "Everyone deserves kindness, even if they're insane."
I hear Sollux scoff. "That's the worst fucking logic I've ever heard."
I agree, but I can't say that out loud. "Cole, he specifically doesn't deserve your kindness. He wouldn't listen or even accept it, not right now. Your kindness would only lead to your death."
Like all of their kindness did. They all tried to reason with him at one point or another. And they all faced the same fate.
Cole shrugs. "He's just tied up right now, it's not like he can hurt me." My breath catches. My heart stops for a second. I wouldn't bet on that.
"Don't be too sure," Karkat warns. "I've seen him do some crazy fucking shit."
That makes two of us.
"He's just barely restrained. If not for the fact that I'm using my godtier to hold those chains in place, he would have already broken out by now." I admit.
Cole nods shallowly, taking two steps away from Gamzee. "I feel like we just walked into a sci-fi drama." He chuckles quietly.
I nod shallowly. "Didn't we do that when we booted the game?"
Cole shakes his head. "Nah, that was more sci-fi horror, we had no drama because it was just us."
I laugh quietly. Cole grins.
"So, what do you need for a chemistry lab? Alchemizer wise?" Karkat asks.
"I don't know. I know I'll need a basic chemistry lab, high power microscopes, measuring tools--I need time. I'll make a list."
"Okay." Karkat nods. "Just let us know as soon as you get it so we can get this asshole unchained."
I nod. I don't even know if I can.
I have to try. I can't do this forever.