Chapter Text
As it rains outside on one dismal November afternoon, Hwang Nari lies shivering on the couch. Her throat is burning, her nose is blocked and the pain in her head is a clear sign that she is definitely running a fever. All evidence should be pointing to the fact that she ought to be feeling miserable or - at the very least - very sorry for herself; but honestly, Nari is having the best day ever. Sick days mean being away from school, from revision classes, from endless hours of studying for her university entrance exams and, most importantly, they mean having appa at home with her, hovering around in between work sessions when he’s tapping quietly at his laptop, and fussing over her at regular intervals.
And appa fusses beautifully.
She is wrapped up in layers of blankets and cushions, surrounded by an endless supply of tea, multivitamin supplements, tissues, comics, cats and treats, and is being looked at with appa ’s mournful and worried eyes and an expression that he reserves just for eomma , for her and for her brother. No wonder eomma is always in such a good mood when she’s down with a cold. This is amazing.
Her father frowns as he looks at the thermometer, pouting worriedly as he places a cool hand on her forehead.
“Appa , do I need to go to school tomorrow?” she asks in the tiniest of voices and with the roundest of eyes.
“You’re not going anywhere for the next few days, Nari-ah. Your mother and I will take it in turns to stay with you,” he replies firmly.
Eomma will be fussing over her too? Nari snuggles even more deeply in her blankets, a gesture that her dad seems to interpret as misery, since he tucks her in even more tightly and randomly selects a cat for her to snuggle with. Luckily, it's Hyeoki, who seems to have been born with the sole purpose of purring away his humans' misery.
As she tucks the cat under her chin, Naru wonders whether she should skip her next doze of cold medication. This warm haze of attention is just too good to be removed too quickly with modern medicine.
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Later that evening, she is happily dozing off to the sound of her dad’s rhythmical chopping in the kitchen, and even though she cannot smell it, she feels fuzzy and loved at the thought that he is cooking her favourite dinner. Her happy reverie is however rudely interrupted by the unmistakable sound of her mother and brother arguing on the landing outside their door. Nari stirs and looks at her father, who stares back helplessly while still holding the chopping knife in mid-air. Further proof of the impending chaos is Eun-chan's excitement as she trots happily to the door, miaowing happily while she waits to greet her favourite human. Father and daughter share an identical sigh just as the door bursts open and eomma and Hyun-Shik rush in, fully engrossed in their argument, and talking in a volume that seems to be rather unreasonably high.
“Hyunshik-ah, what do I always tell you about being smart with me?!”
“I don’t know eomma, you say a lot of things about being smart, and it's mostly mixed signals! Eun-chan, my puss! Come here, love of my life!”
“There is nothing mixed about my signals! You and I need to have a - oh my sick baby, there you are!”
Mid-argument with her brother, her mother catches sight of Nari and diverts her attention towards her sickly form. She makes a beeline for her and envelopes her in a big hug, covering her face with kisses.
This was really the best day ever.
“My little sweet sharkie, how are you feeling my love? Appa and I will stay with you all day tomorrow and we will make you feel all better! My smart girl, you got sick from studying too much didn’t you?”
“See?! Nari acts smart and gets hugs. I act smart and I get yelled at. Mixed signals!”
Eomma rolls her eyes and looks pointedly at Hyun-Shik, who stops in his tracks - still cuddling his beloved cat - at a safe distance from the couch. He looks at her curiously. “What is wrong with you? You look gross and … sticky,” he remarks in slight disgust. Eun-chan hisses in matched disdain, seemingly forgetting the snuggling sessions that she had shared with Nari all day.
Traitor.
“I’m sick Hyun-Shik!”
“Ew. She looks disgusting. Can we send her away somewhere?”
At his parents' identical look of reproach, he shrugs apologetically. At 14, he had recently gone through a growth spurt and had seemingly skipped that ugly stage of puberty which usually manifests in awkwardly long limbs, acne and random facial hair. He had grown a head taller basically overnight, his hair now shines glossy and smooth, and he is starting to walk around with the confidence of a boy who is blessed with good looks and is totally aware of them.
"Fine. I hope you don’t die,” he finally mutters grudgingly.
“Son, we do not joke about sickness,” appa admonishes sternly from his place at the kitchen counter.
“To be fair, you don’t joke about anything now do you?” he replies cheerfully. He lowers the cat down and sniffs appreciatively at the side dishes that his father is preparing while giving him a playful hug. “We don't exactly love you for your humour, appa. But I have to say, your dinners are truly amazing.”
Appa blinks at Hyun-Shik silently before looking at eomma with the helpless look that is usually the only immediate reaction that he can muster at his son's words. And as always, it takes her mother about 1.7 seconds to melt. She gives Nari one last squeeze and moves towards him, giving him a big kiss. “Hello my honeeeey! Don’t listen to our son. We love you for your everything,” she coos as Hyun-Shik and Nari groan in unison. Appa smiles, causing his cheek dimple to appear and eomma to giggle happily. “There it is!” she cries as she pokes it with her fore finger, “my precioussss .”
“Oh. For. Heaven’s. Sake.”
“Hyun-Shik, if you don’t shut your - oh are those corn chips? My beloved son, my best boy, you need to share with your mother!”
“Dinner is almost ready,” appa interjects weakly, but eomma and Hyun-Shik are already perched on the kitchen table sharing corn chips and laughing hilariously at a reel that he is playing for her on his phone.
Nari witnesses this exchange helplessly before dragging herself to the kitchen, blankets, bed-hair, sniffles and all.
“Appa do you need any help?” she asks hoarsely.
He smiles gently and leads her back to the couch, ordering her not to go anywhere near the food, and tucking her in again. She reaches out for his hand and squeezes it gently. In the background, Hyun-Shik and her mother are still giggling away and munching noisily, acting like they weren’t at each other’s throat just a few minutes before. Without any warning and for no logical reason, she feels a pang in her heart. Somehow, seeing them so close makes her feel sad for her father. Perhaps it’s the fever, or the meds, or many other things, but she suddenly feels a little bit inadequate and perhaps … not enough.
“Appa?”
“Yes?" He sees her struggling, and adds gently "Go on Koala, tell me.”
“Does it bother you?”
“What does?”
“That they’re …. Having snacks so close to dinner time?” she asks lamely.
Appa looks at her in silence for a second or two, doing that thing with his eyes where he seems to read right into the darkest corners of her brain, and she gulps down a little lump that is growing in her throat.
“They will still have dinner, and munching keeps them quiet for a little bit,” he replies with a little smile.
She lies in silence for a few seconds again, before mustering the courage to ask what she really wants to know.
“Does it bother you that Hyun-Shik and eomma are so close? Like … he has your face, but he is practically eomma in male form. Do you ever feel left out?”
He squeezes her hand back and shakes his head gently.
“Not at all,” he finally replies. “Like this, eomma and I get to have one each,” he adds.
It takes a few seconds for the depth, and the implication, of what he is saying to hit her. Technically, she could never be his; biology has deemed otherwise, but the fact seems to be that he considers her as the “one” that he gets to have when compared to her brother, who is a basically a physical copy-paste job of their father, and who couldn’t look more like a Hwang even if he tried. She feels warm all over, and happy tears fill her eyes, making her nose leak even more grossly than before.
Appa gives her a tissue and tries not to wince as she blows her nose loudly. She feels, and looks, disgusting but she still throws herself onto her father for a tight hug.
“You’re my appa ,” she whispers. It’s the only thing that she can bring herself to say.
He seems to understand all that is left unspoken between them, and squeezes her to him gently, grossness and all.
“Of course I am,” he murmurs as he strokes her hair. “Today and always.”
The day after, both she and appa wake up sick, and eomma fusses over them both, excessively and wonderfully, while Hyun-Shik is sent to Uncle Won-chul and Eun-chan pines for him at the window.
And this was the best outcome ever.