Comment on Halfway to the Sky

  1. First thing I have to say is that I really like your summary - it's very well done. Is it a little weird to be commenting on a story's summary? Probably. But it seemed worth mentioned. ANYWAY.

    It's SUPER fun reading Aiden's journals - his voice and his attitude are clear from the very beginning. His detachment - "things" - is... let's just say it's easy to see how "speedrunning moral growth" will be relevant dhfjdfhdkjf

    "Nords are effortlessly loud in a way that seems to defy magic" nice detail that's very cool

    "I truly did not wish to kill a mother in order to steal her offspring, but we were given little choice. The Falmer know only the language of violence. I cannot say I was unaffected. The mother’s screams will haunt me for days to come" - this bit is just - ahhhhhhhh it's heartrending

    "It is a male child, though it is hard to say if Falmer align themselves with any gender conventions outside of purely biological roles. Nevertheless, he shall be referred to as male unless he somehow manages to express he prefers otherwise, which is unlikely" vibrates in gender

    "Things have not gone according to plan" I predict that Aiden will be thinking this a lot of times dhfjdk

    "I do not wish for him to call me ‘father’. We’ll have to pick a different word…" lol

    Ahhh, I love Aiden becoming such a dad. Underestimating the effort of childrearing, babyproofing everything, his indignance at Savos Aren's view of Sarel, it's all too perfect

    "It is curious to see him smile. He cannot see my expressions to mimic them, so how does he know how to smile? Is the expression of emotions so innate? Despite his bestial little face, I find his smiles to be quite beautiful" I weep

    The details on Sarel's blindness, how he navigates, his aversion to loud noises - it's really good and it's clear how much research you've done! It's very authentic. And this just from Aiden's POV - if you go into Sarel's, it'll be really interesting to see (lol, well, "see") what his POV and descriptions are like.

    "What have I done to my son?" I WEEP

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    1. THANK YOU FOR COMPLIMENTING MY SUMMARY. Hahahaha I was actually quite happy with it.

      "Things have not gone according to plan" pretty much summarizes most of this story.

      And YES! We'll get a lot of Sarel's POV! I definitely tried to do a ton of research and, most importantly, listen to blind people talk about their experiences. There's so much we take for granted in a day simply being able to see, and it's amazing how beautifully those who are blind can adapt and persevere. I can only hope that I can create some worthwhile representation.

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    2. ashddnie you just nailed all the things i was flustering over how good they were written.

      "I find his smiles to be quite beautiful." ooofff stars, this thing is so adorable <3

      but then there's always the gnawing questions/anticipations, like, the world will /never/ accept Sarel and that lead to a train thought of a scenario where Aiden has a secluded cottage or something and he leaves to get neccessities one day and arrives to find Sarel hurt because someone thought that he was nothing more than a monster.
      Bonus hurt if the person who hypothetically would hurt Sarel to still be there when Aiden arrives, confused as oblivion as to why this horrid thing would speak or dress as a person?

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      1. and that lead to a train thought of a scenario where Aiden has a secluded cottage or something and he leaves to get neccessities one day and arrives to find Sarel hurt because someone thought that he was nothing more than a monster.

        THE PAIN. AUGH. But yes! These are definitely places my own mind went as well when thinking about the ramifications of what bringing Sarel into "civilized" society would mean. It's very messy.

        So glad you're enjoying the story so far!

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