MY BELOVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! YOU'RE BACK!!! i missed you so much in my comments :,) anyways, lets jump right into it <3
1) some of my favorite parts of writing a brief inquiry was showing their development over time, especially through the small blips i give and the little things others may not notice, like different descriptions of how they interact or just barely changed adjectives that show development slowly, but when compared from where they are now and then way back in the first few chapters; its very very noticeable. the imagery here is meant to scream domestically, and for me that starts with how you wake up :)
2) oh me and my long sentences! couldn't live without 'em :,) a lot of times, i let imagery and nouns flow when im working on extra purple prose, and 99% of the time ill look back on the few things i didn't necessarily have specific plans for their deeper meaning or representation and see with crystal clarity a lot of meaning and symbolism i hadnt fully intended but did subconsciously nonetheless. it's so cool to see in action and im so glad people seem to take so much notice :( also, yes, dream is most definitely a /little/ whipped here, but i like to thing he just feels everything so big he doesnt have anything else to do except wax mental poetry about him. and AND i am a FUCKING SUCKER for soulmate aus, and in all honesty, i like to believe every world or au (including ours) is a soulmate au in some way. this fic is now exception : )
3) FIRSTLY IM A HUGE SWIFTIE AND YOU ARE IN LOVE IS ONE OF THE BEST SONGS ON 1989! i listened to the lyrics more carefully while writing one of these chapters and INSTANTLY had to add it because "holy shit i accidentally wrote a songfic". even the little lines, its so goddamn interesting how i managed to incorporate so much without realizing. one of my favorite things is the kiss at the end of this chapter that matches with the verse "One night, he wakes, strange look on his face. Pauses, then says, 'You're my best friend'. You knew what it was, he is in love". once the fic is finished, id love to continue this analysis; because i cant say anything else without dipping into some interesting territory. all i can say, is notice the point of view of the lyrics/singer of you are in love, and who that may be within the fic. ;)
4) BINGO! this is one of many /oh/ moments dream has. i like to think he is realizing how much, and how long hes been in love with george rather than the concept itself; he makes frequent internal nods to frustration of people like his mom, sophie, sadie, all saying they "saw it coming" and "always knew", when he believed he was mr slick about it. the magnitude of everything crashed like glass over him and it basically shattered what his perception of himself had been prior. very interesting and nuanced :)
5) i most DEFINITELY think that dream is FREAKING OUT mentally there, and i hope i got that across. dream is a little... dumb so he definitely didn't get the hint; george has always flirted with him, why does this feel so big? (ps dream's mom's line was what i had originally in my outline, and it was so satisfying to write out)
6) LISTEN I- I DONT KNOW MAN I JUST PUT WORDS OUT. i really appreciate it, though, one thing ive struggled with reading certain books and fics is that they dont take the time to fully flesh out scenes or HOW things happen, not just WHAT happens, which is what i attempt to do. george's vulnerability in this scene is extremely important, and id argue /the/ most important scene pre-fic-ending is this one, for so so many reasons. hes shaking here, and dream cant seem to understand why, but how can he think about anything other than kissing the boy in front of him breathless? hed never break a promise, especially not one to george :) id love to analyze this scene more once i finish this fic because i think a lot more things will make sense
YOU. I MISSED YOU! i hope you know i told my beta and best friend that i missed you in my comments and was so goddamn happy when i saw you back! your analysis is absolutely amazing everytime and writing these replies highlights my day. cannot wait to see what you say about 9-10 too :,) by the time you do 11 may be out as well, but because of the length of the chapter, i am not sure. i just finished moving into my new place and am unpacking boxes- huge weight of my shoulders. DO NOT EVER APOLOGIZE FOR REACHING COMMENT LIMIT! DO NOT! i love it :> i look forward to seeing the more you say :( hope everything irl is well too, take care <3
Comment on a brief inquiry into (real) relationships
quartzfia on Chapter 1 Mon 20 Sep 2021 06:21AM UTC
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