I don't know if I'm real when I'm not being touched.
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he hates how transparent chan always is, how he can't pretend like hyunjin does, how he doesn't hide his disappointment when hyunjin escapes from his kind touch. he hates how chan always fucks him harder after that. after being denied something so simple, so delicate. so warm. after being reminded of what kind of person hyunjin really is.
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Chan doesn't ask. He never does. Just follows along to his bedroom.
So fucking easy to be with him.
That's when the guilt starts kicking in. That's when he wants so bad to be a good person, do the right thing. He thinks again of setting him free. Making the decision Chan clearly can't. Doesn't know how to. Doesn't even want.
But Hyunjin still wants - something, anything.
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