sick of getting by, don't wanna try anymore (we're all gonna die)
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didn't wanna die (before i ever made love) by fuchstrunken
Fandoms: Woodlands National Park (Buddy Films Web Series)
18 Apr 2026
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Summary
It's the near-death-experience thing. Adrenaline spiking high, survival instincts flashing could-be's through his mind, regret bubbling like poison in his heart.
He can be blamed, is the thing. He's emotional and rash and doesn't think things through, but it's been hours, sat down with the lawyers and higher-ups to recount the encounter. Told them John's location—of his body. His remains. If there even are any to recover.
It's not like he's still high off his almost-death.
He doesn't have to grab Alex by the upper arm. Doesn't have to pull him back, right against himself until Steve topples over at the collision, his back hitting the exam table, Alex on top of him, bracing his hands at the sides of Steve's head.
He doesn't have to bury his fingers in the hair at Alex's nape. Doesn't have to pull him down and crash his mouth against his in what's more a bruise than a gentle admission.
He does it anyway.
a state of mind characterized by a complete loss of hope, leading to extreme feelings of fear, sadness, and often, reckless behavior to change a dire situation
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