Anys



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    Mike walks in on his roommate making out with another guy and gets really upset about it. For all of the normal, straight reasons.

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    03 Jan 2026

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    “Are you offended that people think we’re dating?”

    “No,” Mike says immediately. “Of course not,” because, again, he should be so lucky.

    Will’s baffled expression does not change. “Then why would I be?”

    “So– okay, fine, whatever. Should we, like, tell them to get their heads out of their asses and that we’re not– um– dating, or–”

    “I think,” Will cuts in, “well. You know what would be funny?”

    Honestly, Mike doesn't know what he thought being Will Byers' fake-boyfriend would entail, but he definitely didn't think it would involve this many ugly Christmas sweaters.

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    03 Jan 2026

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    Dustin hums in agreement while he swallows his bite. “It’s like, against his factory settings to say no to you. What do you need him to do, model for you or something?”

    Will shoves his face back into his hands. “I’m going to fail.”

    Max rolls her eyes. “You’re not going to fail, you’re going to paint Mike.”

    Will lifts his head up from his hands, eyes wide, and shakes his head. “You don’t understand.” He pleads with his awful, awful friends, voice low. “He’s been, he’s using my-he came out of my bathroom in just a towel last night.”

    --

    Studio art major Will Byers has a study of the human body due before the semester ends, is in desperate need for a model, and has a huge, life-altering, heart wrenching crush on his best friend.

    Enter: Mike Wheeler, his broken shower, and his collection of plaid-print boxers.

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    03 Jan 2026

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    “Do I really have to do this?” Will asks, for what is presumably the millionth time. He lost track a while ago.

    “Yes,” Max replies without hesitation. “You’re unbearably lonely.”

    Will drops his jaw, offended. Sure, he might not have the most entertaining love life, but he wouldn’t go that far. He’s happy where he is. Content. He doesn’t need a guy to fulfill him. “My loneliness is completely bearable.”

    Will reluctantly joins a dating app at his friends’ insistence. He doesn’t have much hope, until he’s messaged by a dork who likes rocks.

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    03 Jan 2026

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    Will needs a date to his mom's wedding. Mike volunteers.

     

    “I have an idea,” says Mike.

    Ice cubes form in Will’s stomach. “How dangerous is it? Like, should I call Dustin to talk you down, or should I call Nancy to be ready to drive us to the hospital?”

    “No,” says Mike, “you can’t tell anyone or it won’t work.”

    “Or what won’t work?” Will asks. It’s like picking up a rock you know a spider will be under.

    Mike gets up and closes Will’s door. Hopper doesn’t make them keep it open but sometimes Will does anyway, because every now and then lying around alone with Mike on his bed just makes his chest ache too much. If the door is open he can tell himself You can’t do anything right now, someone will see.

    Mike leans back against the door. His eyes are lit up with that special maniacal gleam that the Wheelers get right before they do something insane, like when Nancy says, “Then we have to go kill Vecna ourselves,” or whatever. “Take me to the wedding,” says Mike.

    “Yeah,” says Will slowly, “you’ll be at the wedding. Obviously.”

    As your date."

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    03 Jan 2026