phonciblepbone
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Shane had thought it would be practical to room with someone who also plays hockey. Someone who would understand his commitment to the team, who wouldn't get mad at all his hockey gear taking up space, who'd be getting up at the same time when they had morning practices. Someone who would understand the sacrifices necessary for the sport.
Instead, he has this… this… infuriating roommate who smells like cigarettes, who seems allergic to shirts, who loves to invade Shane's personal space, and who is currently sexiling Shane for the third time in five days. Shane glares at the sock on the door incredulously. It's 3 pm. Where is he finding girls who want to fuck at 3 in the afternoon? Shane hasn't even found anyone willing to kiss him yet.
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College freshman Shane Hollander can’t pull girls like his roommate Ilya Rozanov can, so he downloads Grindr in an attempt to blow off steam. Meeting up is too risky, so instead he falls into a prolonged foreplay with user 9in4uuuu, a foreign man with a great ass who loves telling Shane what to do.
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Shane's not stupid. He knows "Lily" is a guy.
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Stumped by phonciblepbone
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
15 Sep 2025
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“It’s not just the butt, Lan Zhan! There’s a guy, a local businessman, who opened 5 franchises in the last 13 years. And then this year? They all failed. And this other woman, who was an architect, she’s suing Prozac. She says their antidepressants gave her aphantasia and she can’t do her job anymore. One guy went blind!”
Put together like that, it does sound as though something strange is happening.
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When Wei Ying finds a social media post from a woman whose ass had “disappeared literally overnight,” and becomes convinced there could be no natural explanation, Lan Zhan agrees to investigate. It turns out to be just one in a series of strange developments. But the case takes a personal turn when Wei Ying wakes up without a voice—and finds that Lan Zhan has lost his grace.
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Touchy Subject by phonciblepbone
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
07 Jun 2025
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Lan Zhan fights to keep a scowl off his face. “Doesn’t everyone?”
Wei Ying blushes and says, “Yeah, totally, totally. But you’re so—I didn’t figure you as the type who would, uh, need it enough to—” and he sweeps his gaze over both their beds as if to say, “Jerk off next to your sleeping roommate.”
“You have never?”
“I—no!” Wei Ying sputters.
Wei Ying had shared a room with his brother growing up. Got through his entire puberty sharing a room.
And never.
Lan Zhan failed after less than two months of having a roommate.
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Preorder by phonciblepbone
Fandoms: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
04 Oct 2024
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“Jiang Cheng! It’s homophobic of you to think I can’t compliment a man. Right, Lan Zhan?” Wei Ying raises her voice to address the question to Lan Zhan.
Lan Zhan loathes being put on the spot, but he still nods in agreement. So that just makes Wei Ying extra right, if Lan Zhan is agreeing with Wei Ying even when she’s being annoying.
And ok the thing is, Wei Ying does have the tiniest crush on Lan Zhan. But she had to work so hard to get her family to accept her as gay. Displaying even a hint of interest in a man would undo all her hard work.
Recent series
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Talismania by phonciblepbone
Fandom: 陈情令 | The Untamed (TV), 魔道祖师 - 墨香铜臭 | Módào Zǔshī - Mòxiāng Tóngxiù
09 Mar 2024
- Words:
- 8,732
- Works:
- 2
- Bookmarks:
- 25