Work Text:
"Help Us"
Damilton: HAVE WE GOT A PROBLEM HERE?
JeSuisChrist: HAVE YOU GOT A BONE TO PICK?
Damilton: YOU'VE COME SO FAR!
JeSuisChrist: WHY NOW ARE YOU PULLING ON MY DICK?
ABurrSir: Someone please stop them they've had that song on repeat for days now
Turtle.Boi: What even is it?
Damilton: HONEY WATCHU WAITIN FOR?
JeSuisChrist: STEP INTO MY CANDY STORE!
Pegarita: TIME FOR YOU TO PROOVE YOUR NOT A LOSER ANYMORE!
Angeli-kickyourass: Peggy?? What the fuck???
MacaroniAndMe: YO THATS HEATHERS
MacaroniAndMe: MAN I FUCKING LOVE HEATHERS
JeSuisChrist: YES THOMAS
4SetsOfCorsets: Heathers??? That 80's movie???
Damilton: Yea but the musical based off of that 80's movie
MacaroniAndMe: Dude heathers is my jam
Damilton: Me Laf and Peggs have ordered Heathers cosplays
JeSuisChrist: Im Duke, Peggs is McNamara, Alexander is Chandler
MacaroniAndMe: I mean, he is a mythic bitch
Damilton: Hell yea i am
SicklyAndPrickly: Thomas dont you have a costume from that?? The trench coat one you wore the last Halloween?
MacaroniAndMe: Holy shit i do
Pegarita: D U D E
Pegarita: WE GET A VERONICA AND WE HAVE THE SET
Damilton: @Eliza you should listen to Heathers
JeSuisChrist: You would be a great Veronica!!!
NarrativeControl: I mean,, sure? I'll listen to it later I've got stuff do
KinkGeorge: Are you doing the the 3D trig??
NarrativeControl: No i finished that im doing the Circle Therom stuff
KinkGeorge: Can you help me i haven't the foggiest what im supposed to be doing here
NarrativeControl: Ya sure PM me
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4SetsOfCorsets: Burr why is your cousin so savage
ABurrSir: ???? Theodosia???
4SetsOfCorsets: Ya
ABurrSir: I??? Explain???
4SetsOfCorsets: Right so we are all just sat in class
4SetsOfCorsets: Sewing away at our projects
4SetsOfCorsets: And this kid??? Comes in??? And is like "Yo man this is a girls class wyd"
Damilton: Wear he at i'll fight him
4SetsOfCorsets: No need, Theodosia heard the guy, stood up and just starts fucking screaming at him
4SetsOfCorsets: Like think Alexander vs Any racist at all
Damilton: Woah i wanna meet this Theodoisia
ABurrSir: They are cool
LittleRedDress: Dude, what was the kids reaction
4SetsOfCorsets: I s2b he was crying when he left
LittleRedDress: s2b?
JeSuisChrist: SWEAR TO BOB
NarrativeControl: LET IT GO YOU LITTLE SHITS
JeSuisChrist: BOB WILL NEVER DIE
NarrativeControl: THATS IT ALEXANDER YOUR MOVING IN WITH ME AND PHILIP CAUSE IM GONNA KILL YOUR ROOM MATE
Damilton: I mean please dont because then the french police would be after you and i cant care for philip alone
LittleRedDress: Who's philip???
Damilton: Myself and Eliza's darling pet cat
NarrativeControl: Picture John but as a cat and thats philip
LittleRedDress: Oh, Nice
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Turtle.Boi: THROWBACK TO THE WEIRD DREAM I HAD LAST NIGHT
ABurrSir: Spoiler, GWash makes me shoplift
Damilton: I??
Turtle.Boi: SO BASICALLY A MAIL TRUCK CRASHED INTO A COMMUNITY CENTER THEN I WENT INTO A SHOPPING MALL INTO A STATIONARY SHOP AND Y'ALL WHERE THERE AND GWASH GAVE AARON A PEN AND WE WALKED OUT AND THE ALARMS WENT OF BC HE DIDNT PAY FOR IT AND THEN WE WHERE GOING ON A SCHOOL TRIP AND GWASH WAS YELLING AT ME AND I WOKE UP
Damilton: Wild
Damilton: I had a dream i was in a helicopter crash
Pegarita: I had a weird fanfiction dream
Damilton: That doesnt sound PG
Pegarita: It was dw
JeSuisChrist: I DIDNT TELL YOU ABOUT MY PORN DREAM OML
SicklyAndPrickly: Yo dude you dont share those
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"@God please dont hate us"
JeSuisChrist: Blowjob threesomes y'all
MacaroniAndMe: Oh, nice
TheCoolerWashington: Context is nice ya know
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JeSuisChrist: Chill y'all i was not doing the 18+ stuff
Damilton: Dont make me bring out the kink police
Damilton: No wait
Angeli-kickyourass: Oml
Damilton: The kink cops
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NarrativeControl: Y'all with a penis consider during the sexy times: "Im harder than taking off a bra from the back"
LittleRedDress: Thats really easy tho?
Angeli-kickyourass: True
Angeli-kickyourass: Oml throwback to when i unhooked my bra in Physical Ed when we were in Highschool
Damilton: That was hilarious
Pegarita: Especially bc it happened infront of Mr Church lmao
Angeli-kickyourass: Shut your promiscuous mouth Miss Schuyler
SicklyAndPrickly: Explain????
Damilton: Mr Church was this super hot teacher at our High School and he used to cover P.E whenever the actual coach was to drunk to do it
NarrativeControl: And if you where attracted to men at all when in that school, you had a crush on Mr Church
Damilton: Which Angelica (and myself tbh) had a hella crush on him
Pegarita: And he was covering P.E and Angelica was messing around with her weird group of gal pals that she just doesnt talk to anymore??
Angeli-kickyourass: They grew up to be such bitches dont even mention it
Damilton: And so theyre all messing around, and one of em grabs her shirt, so she kinda ran forward
NarrativeControl: And it just, unclipped
Angeli-kickyourass: IT WOULDNT RE-CLIP I HAD TO GO TO THE CHANGING ROOMS TO SORT IT OUT
Angeli-kickyourass: Its not as funny as the time Mama bought Alexander panties
Turtle.Boi: W H A T
Pegarita: Oh yea that was hilarious
ABurrSir: Explain???
NarrativeControl: Mom was out picking up underwear for us and she legit text dad like "Yo how many kids have we got" with no context and he was like, "4???"
Pegarita: She came back with 4 sets of panties in our colours and Dad as like "Why did you buy panties for Alexander??" and she just
Pegarita: Fucking lost it
Damilton: They where comfy panties tbh
4SetsOfCorsets: You wore them?
Damilton: Yea.
Damilton: They where comfy.
JeSuisChrist: Same tbh
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Damilton: Yo Theodosia is so cool
ABurrSir: ???
Damilton: Hercs story intrigued me so i scrounged em out
Damilton: And we're getting coffee rn and they're so fun
NarrativeControl: Add them to the chat lmao
ABurrSir: Ill do it
*ABurrSir added DangDiggityDosia to "Help Us"*
DangDiggityDosia: Is this the chat Alexander keeps texting
ABurrSir: Yes
DangDiggityDosia: Yoooo A-a-ron! I didnt know you had friends
Damilton: Savage
ABurrSir: John help im being bullied
Turtle.Boi: Aw, baby, fucking deal with it
DangDiggityDosia: Ah holy shit your John
DangDiggityDosia: Wait theres a shit ton of people who are yall
Damilton: Alexander!
Angeli-kickyourass: Angelica!
NarrativeControl: Eliza!
Pegarita: And Peggy!
DangDiggityDosia: That sounded rehearsed
ABurrSir: The Schuyler(-Hamilton) Siblings!
DangDiggityDosia: So it was
KinkGeorge: Prince George Fredrick The Third
DangDiggityDosia: Dang
JeSuisChrist: Marie-Paul Joseph Paul Yves Roch Gilbert Du Motier, Marquis De Lafayette.
DangDiggityDosia: D a n g
DangDiggityDosia: Wait y'all are the Foreign Royalty Club arent ya
JeSuisChrist: Ye lmao
4SetsOfCorsets: Hercules, but ya knew that
DangDiggityDosia: Ayyyy ma boi
LittleRedDress: Yo, Maria Lewis, sup
MacaroniAndMe: Thomas Jefferson
SicklyAndPrickly: James Madison
DangDiggityDosia: Sup, Theodosia Burr, (They/Them if ya dont mind)
MacaroniAndMe: No problem fam
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LittleRedDress: How many bra's are too many
Pegarita: When you have enough to give to your friends some and still have loads
LittleRedDress: I have 10, still after giving you some
Pegarita: I have like 4 what
Pegarita: I dont even have any matching panties
LittleRedDress: All of mine match tbh
Pegarita: Mom never buys me matching it sucks
LittleRedDress: Ill take you shopping dw about it
Pegarita: Hell yea
DangDiggityDosia: Yo can i come ik we just met but i need to shop so
LittleRedDress: Sure
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Turtle.Boi: This is an open invatation for Eliza and Hercules to NOT fuck on my couch when im home thanks
Angeli-kickyourass: WHAT
Damilton: W H A T
Pegarita: E W
ABurrSir: What the Duck you two
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NarrativeControl: OH MY GOD HERC YOU SAID HE WASNT HOME
4SetsOfCorsets: I THOUGHT YOU WHERE ON AN ART DATE WITH AARON???
Turtle.Boi: I WAS TRYING TO LEAVE FOR THAT DATE BUT I COULDNT LEAVE MY ROOM BECAUSE MY COUCH WAS BEING DEFILED
ABurrSir: Are you on your way now??
Turtle.Boi: Yea lmao i climbed onto the fire escape and climbed down
NarrativeControl: OHMYGOD JOHN IM SO SORRY
NarrativeControl: IM NEVER HAVING SEX WITH YOU AT YOUR PLACE AGAIN HERC, IF YOU WANT SOME YOUR GONNA HAVE TO TRECK FOR IT
4SetsOfCorsets: GOD DAMN IT YOU LIVE SO FAR AWAY THO
NarrativeControl: TO BAD BITCH
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Pegarita: Are you considered a virgin if it was fingers
Pegarita: Like its not Sex but its kinda sex
LittleRedDress: ???
Pegarita: Like would that count as foreplay?
Pegarita: Like its not Penis sex??
LittleRedDress: If you've been fingered your not a virgin
LittleRedDress: Lesbians Peggy
Pegarita: Oh shit yea i forgot about that
Damilton: Peggy your a lesbian how did you forget about yourself
NarrativeControl: Why are you even asking that
Pegarita: Asking for a friend
DangDiggityDosia: ((Im the friend))
Angeli-kickyourass: WHAT DID YOU DO ON THAT SHOPPING TRIP
Pegarita: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
DangDiggityDosia: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
LittleRedDress: I got them snacks
Damilton: Ohmygod peggy your not supposed to have sex with people you've just met
Damilton: Atleast by em dinner first
Pegarita: SHIT YEA
Pegarita: Dosia and Maria wanna get dinner
DangDiggityDosia: Hell Yea
LittleRedDress: Sure
Angeli-kickyourass: Eliza i see you lurking do n o t stalk them in their date
NarrativeControl: Wow, expose me like this Angelica
Damilton: W e l p
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KinkGeorge: Who plays Gaston in the New Beauty and the Beast?
KinkGeorge: He looks familiar but idk
SicklyAndPrickly: Uh, Luke Evans
MacaroniAndMe: I fkin love luke evans
Turtle.Boi: ??? Who??
MacaroniAndMe: He was Bard in the Hobbit/ Dracula in Dracula
MacaroniAndMe: He's been in loads of stuff
Turtle.Boi: Ohhhh him okay
NarrativeControl: Someone send a picture idk what he looks like
NarrativeControl: I recognise the name but like
MacaroniAndMe: He looks like Orlando Bloom
Angeli-kickyourass: Like, to the point that he showed up in the hobbit and i was like "Yo is that Orlando Bloom" despite the fact that Orlando Bloom had been on screen like 5 minuetes before
NarrativeControl: Holy shit its BTEC Orlando Bloom okay ik who we are on about
Turtle.Boi: He was really cute in the Hobbit his character was pure
MacaroniAndMe: Like his entire character was like, Bard: "Dwarves keep fucking me over never helping them again" Dwarves: Need Help Bard: *Pulling out long bow* "GDI gotta help the dwarves"
JeSuisChrist: You know whos hot in that movie? Lee Pace
Damilton: Holy Shit that man as Thranduil made me feel things
ABurrSir: You two just have Older Men Kinks dont you
JeSuisChrist: Y a pretty much
Damilton: Dont kinkshame us
ABurrSir: Im not gonna kinkshame you
Turtle.Boi: He's gonna do it in our private chat
SicklyAndPrickly: Exposed lmao
Damilton: You know who else is hot??? The guy who plays Lindir in the first one
MacaroniAndMe: Oh yea he was fkin smokin
Damilton: I should rewatch those movies tbh
MacaroniAndMe: I have all the DVD's dya wanna marathon em
SicklyAndPrickly: Am I invited
Damilton: Hell Yea fam lets go
JeSuisChrist: Can i come???
MacaroniAndMe: Sure, Anyone else?
KinkGeorge: No thanks, homework calls
NarrativeControl: Shit thanks for reminding me
Angeli-kickyourass: Nah, not a fan tbh
Damilton: How are we related
Angeli-kickyourass: I mean, technically we arent
Damilton: ,,, True
LittleRedDress: The Pegs and Theo are currently,,, occupied so like, no
Turtle.Boi: Same
ABurrSir: Shut up John there isnt anything sexual about what we are doing
Turtle.Boi: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)
MacaroniAndMe: Is there anyone else???
4SetsOfCorsets: I'll join y'all i aint got nothing else to do
SicklyAndPrickly: I'll bring snacks
JeSuisChrist: Me and Alexander are in our onsies so prepare for that
MacaroniAndMe: Nice
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KinkGeorge: Thomas whatever happened to that sugar daddy of yours
MacaroniAndMe: Oh he sends me money every now and then he's pretty cool tbh
MacaroniAndMe: He sent me this r e a l l y nice pair of shoes and i love them so much
KinkGeorge: Ah, good.
MacaroniAndMe: Why??
KinkGeorge: You havent really mentioned him in a while i was curious
MacaroniAndMe: Ah
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Damilton: You know I've never thought about it until now but Laf and Thomas look exactly the same
JeSuisChrist: what
Damilton: Herc and James to its really weird
4SetsOfCorsets: Holy shit he isnt wrong
SicklyAndPrickly: Woah
Damilton: I'd say yall could be related but I've met both Herc and James's parents, Laf is Rich and French and Thomas is rich but not French
Turtle.Boi: Isnt there a theory that there are 7 people in the world who look exactly like you?
Damilton: Shit yea
JeSuisChrist: I dont see it
MacaroniAndMe: I mean, maybe if i trimmed my beard a bit and Put my hair up??
Damilton: Its weird.
JeSuisChrist: Just watch the damn movie alexander
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Damilton: OH MISTY EYE OF THE MOUNTAIN BELOWWWW
JeSuisChrist: KEEP CAREFUL WATCH OF MY BROTHERS SOULLS
MacaroniAndMe: AND WHEN THE SKY FILLS WITH FIRE AND SMOKEEEE
SicklyCareful: KEEP WATCHING OVER DURINS SONSSS
4SetsOfCorsets: And then the entire line of durin just dies in the next one
4SetsOfCorsets: You had one job mountain
4SetsOfCorsets: One Job.