Chapter Text
Original Prompt: "So you know those fics where post-ROTS Obi-Wan's consciousness is somehow sent back in time to when he was a padawan and he sets out to make everything better? I'd like a fic with the same premise, except instead of trying to fix things Obi-Wan promptly breaks down and tries to nope the fuck out. He is 100% done with this shit, he is sick of being jerked around by the Force and watching all of his loved ones die, so he is getting out while the going is good and become an Outer Rim space pirate or something. Obi-Wan is DONE.
Your choice if he really does join Hondo's fleet (or elope with Satine, or anything that does not involve being a Jedi, or whatever), or if Qui-Gon calms him down and gets him to stay."
A/N: Sadly, I never did get as far as figuring out whether he joined Hondo's fleet but I'm sort of partial to him turning up on Satine's doorstep and going 'Can I sleep on your couch for the rest of my life?'
Original dreamwidth thread - https://starwarskinkmeme.dreamwidth.org/586.html?thread=1145418#cmt1145418
"I'm going to be a pirate," Obi-Wan announces, "No, a bounty hunter. Or maybe I'll go back to Bandomeer and be a farmer. I'll think of something."
"Padawan, I don't understand..." Qui-Gon is trying to be supportive. He is trying to listen. He is, moreover, trying to be calm.
But this unusual turn of events is starting to concern him.
Not only has Obi-Wan broken down in the middle of the night and unleashed what amounted to a psychic explosion of pain and fear and anger that roused half the Temple and all the Council members, but he is now throwing random things into packs and then throwing them back out again.
Qui-Gon is worried enough that he does something a Master should not do - he reaches out and physically catches his Padawan by the arm. He swings him around, shakes him a little, and holds him there firmly while he looks down into his eyes.
And he allows his own vulnerability and confusion to be obvious.
"Obi-Wan," he says, "What is going on?"
And so Obi-Wan tells him. Something about a dark future and war and death - "so much death", Obi-Wan mumbles, almost to himself - and his voice begins to rise and the Force is chaotic with the stirrings of fear and pain and anger again.
"Calm down," Qui-Gon instructs.
And in response, his staid, obedient student breaks his hold, turns around and shatters a low stool with a crash of Force-energy.
In the silence, Obi-Wan's breathing is harsh and loud.
"In the circumstances," he says finally, "I'm being remarkably calm, Master."
"Obi-Wan, something is troubling you..."
Obi-Wan laughs. "Yes," he says, "Yes, I am troubled. I am angry. I am done. I have lived this and I will not live it again. I have given all I had and it was never good enough."
He snatches the pack up and strides to the door.
"Padawan, you will stop right now," Qui-Gon says harshly.
Obi-Wan whirls around. "In a year, Master, you will be given a mission to Naboo as an ambassador of the Republic. If you have any sense, you will run in the other direction. If you don't, at least take three Masters and a full medical team with you. And even then I would pray to the Force. Much good it's ever done any of us," he mumbles bitterly.
And then he leaves.