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The sun was warm, like it always had been, but Alec never noticed how much so now that he couldn’t feel it. At least not directly. Not now that it would burn him if it touched him. It was weird how much Alec missed the sunlight now that he couldn’t ever stand in it again. Part of him wanted to laugh, Alec was now one of the monsters he use to hunt, but mostly he just wanted to forget everything that happened the past three days. Alec turned away from the window and went to sit on Magnus’s bed.
He was glad to be here, even if he felt trapped at the same time since leaving would mean death. It was familiar and comforting, almost like home. Maybe now it was since he couldn’t live at the Institute anymore. The thought of not being able to call the place he lived his whole home reminded Alec of just how lost he felt.
Thankfully Magnus had amazing timing. Alec heard a portal open up in the living followed by Magnus walking through it. He also ignored how much louder it was now compared to before; how much louder everything was now.
Magnus was as quiet as he could be, he had an idea of what Alec was going through. He sat down next to Alec on the bed, who hadn’t even looked up from the floor, and wrapped an arm around his shoulders. Magnus wanted more than anything to help his boyfriend, undo what had been done, but there wasn’t anything he could do. It just wasn’t possible to turn someone back from being a vampire. No matter how much both of them wanted it to happen.
For awhile, both men just sat there not saying anything. Neither of them knew what to say. Alec’s life had been completely turned upside. Magnus was amazed at the fact that he was taking it this well. Or perhaps he was just trying to be strong, trying to regain the control he lost, go back to being the person he was before.
That’s why Magnus was completely caught off guard when Alec started to cry; especially since he had never seen him cry before. It wasn’t loud or vocal in anyway, but heartbreaking all the same. The sight of it brought tears to Magnus’s eye, who was barely able to hold them back. Alec needed him and he wasn’t going to let him down. So Magnus pulled Alec closer to him, holding him tightly, and kissed the top his of hair.
It wasn’t much but to Alec it was everything. Something that reminded him of what he still had. Despite seemingly have lost so much, Alec still had the that cared for him; still had his family. He still had Magnus. It was a small comfort in the face of uncertainty he now faced.
“I’m scared.” Alec’s voice cracked and was hoarse from lack of use. It was the first time he really spoke since the night he crawled up from that damned grave. This time Magnus did cry. Not as much as Alec was though.
“I know. I am too.” Magnus wrapped his arms around Alec even tighter. “But I’m here. I will always be here for you, I promise.” Alec nodded his head as Magnus spoke, knowing it was a promise he would always keep. One Alec would do everything to keep as well.