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Of Inlaws and People you shouldn't introduce them to

Summary:

Jack and the Doctor meet up for a chat and a trip to parts unknown. Aka the Doctor takes him to meet his new inlaws. This goes as well as can be expected.

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The last time Jack had seen the Tardis the consol had glowed red bathing the room in the comforting light of a fire. Now it was as if the room had been designed by a whimsical child. An apt description he decided as he watched this newest version of the doctor flit around pull knobs and pushing levers. “So are you going to tell me what this is about?” he asked leaning on the railing (that had somehow spontaneously appeared).
“Nope! It’s a surprise!” the Doctor replied as he began twisting the dials on what looked like a tv embedded in the upper portion of the dash.
The loud crunch as the Tardis presumably landed wherever it was they were going made Jack roll his eyes as he pulled out his Webly and walked to the door.
“Jack! What have I said about guns!” the Doctor exclaimed indignantly behind him hurrying to catch up.
“You won’t use them. IT doesn’t mean that They won’t” Jack retorted trying to peek through the glass to see outside.
“Well that’s beside the point. And I don’t think they will shoot us!” The Doctor replied pushing past Jack to open the door. Looking at the mangled flower bed he had landed in he turned pale. “Oh dear….”
“DOCTOR!!! WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT LANDING IN MY BLOODY GARDEN!?!” a red headed woman came storming out of the house looking murderous.
Grabbing Jack the Doctor retreated inside “Tactical retreat. Never mess with an angry Scottish woman” he said quickly moving to take off again.
Bemused Jack watched him dash away prepping for take off.
“Who’s she?” He asked motioning to the door that was currently being pounded on
“DOCTOR IF YOU DON”T LET ME IN THIS MINUTE I AM CALLING RIVER!”
The Doctor deflated. “That’s just not playing fair” he muttered sulking as he trudged to the door. Opening it he was met with a slap and a hug as Amy launched herself at him. Turning to Jack the Doctor said “Amy meet Jack”
“Hello Amy” Jack said smoothly as he kissed her hand. The Doctor elbowed him hard
“Stop it! She’s my mother-in-law!”
“Wait what?” Jack asked blinking. “When did that happen?” he looked at Amy obviously expecting her to be able to answer more coherently than the Doctor. She sighed.
“It’s a long story and I need a lot of alcohol to get it right” Amy said flipping her hair over her shoulder.
“well then it would be my pleasure to grab dinner with you.” Jack said with a grin as he looped his arm through hers.
“Wait! What?! Jack she’s married!” The Doctor sputtered from behind them.
“Rory won’t mind” Amy said with an airy wave of her hand
“Wait Rory the Roman?” asked Jack pausing suddenly
“Yes How did you know?” She asked turning to him confused.
“I ran into him a few times its one of those hopping through space and time things” Jack replied with a shrug. “Nice bloke if a bit attached to that box. Wait that was you inside right?”
“Yes that was me” she said with a wry smile. “In any case I am positive he won’t mind at all.”
They turned to the doctor who looked ready to throw up.
“Well?”
“Are you coming”
“I think I’ll just stay here…..”
“I’ll send River to look after you” Amy said cheerfully

Crash landing in the Ponds flowerbed meant that the doctor was in ‘let me fix this before Rory gets home mode’ with a quick shift of the tardis he went back in time to see how the garden had previously looked and then quickly hopped back to the present to fix it. 40 minutes and a trip to the flower beds of Versailles later he had gotten the garden back (mostly) to its original condition. Ok so 40 minutes was actually 2 months but nobody would ever know that (he really hoped nobody ever found out about his run in with George VI that had been….awkward?). Looking satisfied he flopped on the bench. Now to wait for Amy and Jack to show back up. He wasn’t too concerned honestly. Amy could take care of herself and Jack well Jack would deserve whatever happened to him as a result. Unsurprisingly Rory got back first. The obvious big blue box parked in his backyard made him seriously consider not getting out of the car. Then he remembered that Amy probably needed him. The Doctor always managed to get the two of them into trouble. Walking to the back yard he spotted the Doctor reading on the bench and a flower garden he didn’t quite remember looking that way that morning. Standing in front of the Doctor he waved his hand in front of his eyes. “Hey anyone home?”
“Oh hello Rory!!” The Doctor snapped out of whatever place he had been inside his head giving the man a hug.
Looking at the garden again Rory turned to him saying “Amy is going to kill you”
“Why? I think it’s a very nice garden! It looks just like how it did earlier!”
Rory gave him a flat look “She will be able to tell the difference and where is she by the way?”
The Doctor smiled nervously. “Do you remember meeting a Captain Jack Harkness?”
“I am going to kill you.”
“Amy will be fine they were just grabbing dinner!”
“YOU LET MY WIFE GRAB DINNER WITH HIM?!”
“he said he knew you! I thought Amy could handle him!”
Rory started rubbing the bridge of his nose. “You. Let. My. Wife. Grab. Dinner. With. Jack.”
I wanted to show off my new in-laws?”
“I swear to god I do not know what River sees in you.”
“She likes my charm?”
“That must be it” Rory said with a sigh trudging towards the house and a drink.

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