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“For today’s lesson, you’ll be simply observing.”
“Kakashi-sensei?”
“Mm.”
“Is this safe?”
Kakashi smiled. “Not even a little bit.”
“Shotgun!” Naruto yelled, bounding up to the passenger seat door and tugging wildly at the handle. “Unlock it, unlock it!”
“Sorry, Naruto, but Sasuke gets to sit in the front seat.” Sakura put her hands on her hips.
“What? But I called it!”
“I called it before but you probably couldn’t hear me over the revving noises you were making.” Moving past him, Sasuke waited for Kakashi to unlock his car and then slipped into the passenger seat.
“Ugh. It’s not everyday we get actually go racing.” Naruto whined, leaning against the side of the old silver race car dejectedly.
“We’re not actually racing.” Kakashi reminded, opening the door for Naruto. “We don’t need to make this any more dangerous than it already is.”
“More dangerous?” Sakura asked. “What do you- “
“Yeah! Lemme in!”
Sasuke settled into his seat, folding his arms over his seatbelt. This wasn’t even a real race, but they were still supposed to observe what it would look like to be in one. It sounded boring.
For such a high ranking ninja, Kakashi-sensei had a really bad car. There wasn’t anything especially unique about it, just an average four-door silver race car with chipped paint. The interior wasn’t anything more impressive, all black with a giant gear shift. The only thing of interest was an obvious red button on the side of the steering wheel. Sasuke sighed.
“Am I allowed to say this is a shit car?”
Kakashi scoffed and turned the key, starting the car. “No.”
“Okay. This is a shit car.”
“Uh, Sensei? Naruto’s seatbelt doesn’t work,” said Sakura from the backseat, looking nervously at her teacher through the rearview mirror.
“Hm.” Kakashi waved her off. “He’ll probably be fine, right?”
“Sakura, are you worried about me?” Naruto laughed and Sakura turned away from him, huffing.
“Ugh, never.” In truth, she didn’t want to be in this race. Sakura would only wake up this early to see Sasuke, and as nice as the back of his head was, that’s really all it was. And she trusted Kakashi-sensei, but she wasn’t sure if she trusted his car. The shredded bumper, missing headlight and piercing scent of burning rubber felt like obvious red flags.
Almost worst of all, Sakura was stuck in the back with Naruto, who was giggling and kicking the seat in front of him so hard Kakashi-sensei was getting whiplash. It was he that she was most concerned about, as there had to be some way he was going to get them killed.
When they started to move, Naruto pressed his nose to the window. It was his first time on the actual race track, and in a Jonin car! “Kakashi-sensei, how fast can this car go?”
The car rolled backwards and Kakashi turned to look over his shoulder as he moved out of his parking spot. He looked at Naruto and shrugged. “Just don’t stick your head out the window.”
“Wow!” He grinned at his instructor, who smiled back. “My cars going to be even better this one day! Even better than the Hokage’s. Believe it!”
Sasuke’s deadpan voice came from the front seat. “Maybe you should learn to parallel park first.”
“You should learn how to drift.”
He narrowed his eyebrows. “I can drift just fine. You shouldn’t have graduated.”
Naruto snickered and turned to Sakura. “He’s just mad because I scratched the Sharingan one time.”
“That,” Sasuke growled, looking over Kakashi’s arm, “is the Uchiha family car.” Naruto showed no change in his face and Sasuke glowered at him. “Excuse me for being mad.”
“Stop glaring at me,” Naruto hissed.
“Stop being a loser,” Sasuke hissed back.
(Neither of those things were going to happen anytime soon, so it was a draw.)
“Are all of you ready?” Kakashi asked. The Genin’s arguing was cut short as the stared at the wide expanse of perfect concrete. They’d seen races there before, but had never driven on it before. As the wheels of the car drifted to the starting line, it felt like clouds under the wheels.
All three were silent in wonder as the sun broke through the clouds, lighting up the track.
Kakashi hit the horn and Naruto jumped so high he hit his head on the ceiling. “Hey!”
“You’re my subordinates. Listen when I talk, just in case I ever say something important.” Kakashi looked at each one of his students. “Are you ready?” They nodded earnestly. “Good.” He shifted into drive.
If Sasuke had to describe what that first acceleration was like, it was as if a giant air hand was trying to crush his body. He was forcefully pushed into his seat and his feet instinctually jumped up to the dash, hands clenched at his sides and teeth bared.
“You can’t fight air, Sasuke,” said Kakashi, seemly unaffected by the screaming and rattling of his car. Sasuke looked at him with murder in his eyes, but then stifled a laugh.
“Is that why your hair looks like that? You drive too fast?”
Kakashi took a sharp left turn on the track with little warning and Sasuke’s face was gracefully slammed against the window.
“Important rule of being a good driver!” Kakashi yelled over the car noise. “Mind your own business.” Sasuke groaned and righted himself but felt his nose begin to bleed, much to the concern of Sakura.
He sunk in his seat to sulk. Kakashi-sensei was clearly born of pure evil.
“Sensei!” Naruto screeched. “What’s your car’s jutsu? I’ve never seen it!” Kakashi had only ever mentioned it, nothing more, but Naruto was sure it had to be awesome. Naruto had Shadow Clone, Sasuke had Sharingan and Sakura had… Something probably. But a Jonin level jutsu should be incredible, especially if it belongs to someone as mysterious and cool as their teacher.
“Mine?”
“Yeah! What your car’s name?”
“I’m glad you asked.” The red button on the side of the steering wheel gleamed. It could be the trigger of his jutsu or a self-destruct button. Or both.
“The jutsu? Lighting cutter.” The students watched with wide eyes as his finger approached the button. “The name?” The anticipation mounted until he was about to press it, and then swung his arm upwards.
“Lighting McQueen.”
And then he slammed that motherfucking jutsu button.
Sakura saw her entire life flash in her mind. The blue-white light that suddenly surrounded them was blinding and their speed reached a new wild high. The noise was as if a million birds were suddenly stuffed in the car with them. In that moment, she was truly prepared to die.
Sasuke desperately tried to put down the window, as he had decided it was probably best to die a gruesome death dragged along the race track than continue to ride in a car called Lighting McQueen. Unfortunately, the child lock was on, and all Sasuke could do was pull his headband over his eyes and try to pretend his bones weren’t rattling.
Naruto was having an excellent time. This was more than he could have ever asked for. He couldn’t feel his teeth and he thought maybe his hands were gone, but he never thought he’d be riding in a Lighting Cutter! He looked out the window to see only blurs combined with the now slightly faded glow of the lightning.
“I’m faster than fast,” Kakashi murmured under his breath. “Quicker than quicker.”
“What did you say?” yelled Naruto, sticking his head in between the seats.
“Sensei, the car is on fire!”
“I am Lighting!”
As quick as he had started, Kakashi slammed his foot on the break, and everything jolted to a stop.
Sasuke’s face once again hit glass. Sakura was thrown against the back of Sasuke’s seat, and Kakashi caught Naruto under one arm before he could go hurtling through the windshield. “One second, kids.” Putting Naruto back and grabbing a fire extinguisher from under his seat, Kakashi went to put out the fires on the wheels.
“That was great!”
“That was interesting?”
“I want to die.”
“You didn’t like it at all, Sasuke?” He turned around to face Sakura, hair ruined by the heat and nose pouring blood down his face. “Oh.”
“You look good,” said Naruto sarcastically. He snickered at Sasuke’s glare, and stuck out his tongue as Sasuke look away. “Guess you just got scared, huh?”
Sasuke suddenly turned to face him and twisted in his seat. He leaned into the backseat. Blood dripped onto the front of Naruto’s jacket as Sasuke contorted to face him, only inches away.
“I’m not scared. Not of anything. Not of this car and definitely,” his black eyes stared intensely into Naruto’s, “definitely not of you.”
And then he was gone, retracting to his seat and unlocking the door to step back outside.
“Naruto! Why are you like this?” Sakura yelled as soon as the door clicked shut. “I’ve never, ever been that close to him, and all you do is insult him?” Naruto shrugged.
“I don’t know, Sakura. He’s kind of dumb, anyway, so maybe you’re wasting your time.”
“Is that all you have to say for yourself?”
“He smells nice?”
“You- you’re insufferable.” Sakura kicked her door open and stormed away.
Naruto looked around at the inside of the car and smiled. Someday his was going to be even better than this one. The noise and the heat and the light and the rushing of his heart. All of that, but a million times more.
Kakashi opened his door. “I dealt with the fires. You can come out now.”
Naruto jumped out of the car, beaming and tugging on his teacher’s sleeve. “Will you please let me ride in Lightning McQueen again?”
“Wow. That’s the first time somebody has actually used it’s name. Okay. Anyway.” Kakashi smiled. “Of course you can.”
