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Tony leaned against the railing overlooking the interior of Stark Tower, where his largest engineering laboratory had been smoothly converted into a party room capable of entertaining most of the students at Avengers Academy. The lights were low, perfect for dancing, the Tower’s robots were serving up drinks at the bar without exploding or electrocuting anyone at all, and best of all- no one was going to catch them.
“Looks like your invention is working,” Brian announced, coming up to Tony still examining the readings on one of Tony’s tablets. His hat buzzed through the air around him. Tony ducked to save his wizard hat from the blades. “The sonic disruptors are canceling out music and crowd noise beyond the edges of the property.” He looked up when he reached Tony’s side. “Come on mate, you promised not to get sloshed tonight.”
Tony tossed back the rest of his drink, ignoring the disapproving look he received. “It’s just one drink. Jarvis will monitor the disruptors and tell us if anything’s going wrong. Besides, this is a party! Don’t you want to have fun?” He produced a fresh bottle from one of the pockets of his wizard robe (turned out sorcerer's robes are bigger on the inside) and wiggled it enticingly.
Brian looked from Tony to the tablet and back again. At that moment in the lab below them, DJ Vision changed the music to something with a heavy beat, and the lights darkened dramatically. The smirk that spread across Brian’s face looked almost evil in the new shadows, and that was completely why Tony shivered. Definitely.
“I consider dancing more fun than drinking,” Brian said, leaning in close so he could be heard over the music.
Tony nodded so hard he almost hit the spy in the chin. “No rule says you can’t do both!”
“Well,” Brian considered. Tony smiled his best smile. “Alright. You’ve convinced me. But just one.”
Several drinks later...
“Pay attention, you fools!”
A flash of green appeared in Tony’s vision and he stumbled backwards. He tripped over the hem of the robe and nearly fell over, except that Brian caught him before his center of balance tipped completely, holding Tony tight in his arms to keep him steady. Tony looked up at his savior and giggled, then hiccupped. Brian shook his head at Tony in amusement, his amazing hair flopping perfectly.
“Do not ignore me!”
Tony and Brian looked up at Loki, who- whoops, he’d been talking for a while, hadn’t he? The sorcerer pointed angrily toward the other end of the dance floor, where spinning, glowing portals had opened up and things were floating around the air. Ms. Marvel and Luke Cage were floating, too, but Falcon and Jessica Jones were guiding them to the ground.
“Mister Weirdo has lost control of his magic,” Loki said haughtily. “You Midgardians and your inability to hold your liquor.”
“Looks fine to me,” Tony laughed. Wonder Man had floated up toward the ceiling as well. No one was trying to help him.
“I doubt you’ll feel that way when Director Fury arrives,” Loki said pointedly. “Those portals are opening up at other points on campus. There’s no doubt they’ll be detected soon.”
“I think this calls for my grappling-hook watch, and possibly the knock-out cologne.” Brian drew himself up (and Tony, since he was still helping Tony stand) and stumbled off toward the source of the trouble.
“Thanks for the heads-up,” Tony said to Loki.
The Asgardian sniffed. “If you wish to waste your time with Flag Man, it is of no concern to me. I merely ask that you don’t drag down the rest of us due to your inattention to more important things.”
Tony wobbled toward his fellow student. “Loki…”
“Anybody down there who can spare a second?”
Tony kicked off into the air, almost completely not unsteadily, and caught Mockingbird as she floated toward him, laughing in delight. He set her down and turned back to an aloof Loki. “I’ll be back in a sec, okay? We’re gonna talk about your clear and obvious crush on me.”
Lok scowled, but Tony flew away to retain the last word.
Some more drinks later...
“Ow, shit!” Tony hopped on one foot to make it the last few steps to the bed, and dropped Doctor Strange’s mumbling, floppy body onto it.
Brian, who was carrying the legs, caught himself on the footboard as his legs gave out for a moment. “You alright there, chap?
“I stepped on a beard trimmer.”
“Another one?”
“I swear to Odin this guy has sixteen of them! I think it damaged my jetboot!” Tony complained, wobbling as he looked at the bottom of his foot.
Brian laughed hard enough that he ended up curled awkwardly on the bed.
“It’s not funny!” Tony insisted. “These things are hard to make. He’s gonna owe me bigtime for this.”
“He owes me for leaving the party.” Brian sat up suddenly, the light of brilliance glowing in his gorgeous brown eyes. “How about we put those beard trimmers to use?”
Tony swooped to the floor to pick up a pair of the utensils that were scattered around the room. He barely made it vertical again. “Let’s get serious!”
...
Tony woke up suddenly as a horrified shriek echoed across campus in seven dimensions. He clutched his aching head as he laughed.
“Score,” Brian mumbled.
Tony sat straight up. He was in his bed in Stark Tower, but… his wizard robe was gone. And Brian’s flag sweater was gone too. And they were both covered in… locks of hair?
Oh, and Brian was in his bed.
“What the hell happened last night?!” he shouted.
Brian curled his hands over his ears. “Asgardian alcohol,” he said very quietly. “And I think we gave Doctor Strange a mohawk.”
Tony considered this. “I think I invited Loki to have a threesome with us in my hot tub sometime.”
There was a moment of silence.
“All in all, not my worst night,” Brian commented, smiling up at Tony. Or, near Tony, at least. He hadn’t managed to open his eyes yet.
Tony smiled back anyway. “Not bad at all.”