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Dazai liked to touch Atsushi. Small touches. Barely noticeable touches. So subtle that he began to doubt that Atsushi even noticed. Completely casual.
The very first time Dazai touched Atsushi, the younger man absolutely did not notice. As the tiger came rushing at Dazai in the warehouse he simply stretched out his hand and gently placed two fingers against his forehead. In a flash the tiger transformed back into Atsushi, who promptly passed out into his arms. He wanted to hold him longer, but that feeling of wanting to prolong their touch took him off guard and he promptly dropped the younger man to the floor. At that moment words escaped him that he quickly regretted.
"I'm not interested in men that way."
What's possessed him to say that? He was bisexual. Everyone knew he was bisexual. If Atsushi joined the agency that'd become apparent very quickly. So why? Why?
A few days later it became clear that Atsushi remembered none of this. He didn't remember Dazai's outburst. He didn't remember anything from being the tiger at all. He didn't remember... the touch. Nothing.
Dazai took this as a second chance. He'd play this cool. No outbursts. No dropping Atsushi on the floor. Just touching. Subtle touching. Real casual. So casual.
"Atsushi-kun," he said as he came up behind Atsushi's chair. He rested his head on top of Atsushi's and stared at the computer monitor. Casually. "What are you doing?"
"Uh, work?"
Sure enough the kid was writing a report from their last assignment. Damn. The kid's work ethic was too good. Dazai would have to work on that. Atsushi needed to relax.
"That's boring. Let's go out for drinks!"
"Dazai-san, it's barely noon."
"And?" Atsushi sighed and Dazushi reluctantly backed off.
Maybe I need to be less subtle, he thought.
-
About a week later they found themselves sitting next to each other on one of the couches in the office as Kunikida droned on about some budgetary issue regarding their last mission. Dazai was only half paying attention to the spiel when he noticed an opportunity present itself. Atsushi, bless his soul, was actually paying attention to Kunikida as Dazai stretched, leaning back against the arm of the couch, and slung his legs over Atsushi's lap. The younger man was taken back by the sudden intrusion in his space at first, but snapped his attention back to Kunikida as the man ranted on.
Well that was.... good? He wasn't being rejected. But nobody seemed to be paying attention either. Most importantly Atsushi wasn't paying attention.
"Dazai, this is important!" Kunikida snapped.
"I can hear you just fine," he replied as he slung his arm over his eyes to block out the harsh fluorescent ceiling lights.
He wasn't sure what happened next, but the next thing he knew he was waking up alone in a dark office. Atsushi and the rest of the crew were nowhere to be found. Complete failure..
-
Dazai and Atsushi found themselves in the back of the car as Kunikida drove them and Yasano back to the Agency. This mission had been a particularly tough one and Atsushi had been impaled yet again by Akutagawa. He'd healed spectacularly, though, and was now merely disheveled and exhausted.
Atsushi's ability to heal himself consistently surprised Dazai. He was the best self healer he'd ever encountered. Yosano had only had to step in once so far (and based on Atsushi's reaction to her methods, he'd try to never let it get that far again). But they'd succeeded. For now. The Port Mafia would continue to antagonize them and present challenges as they moved forward, but at least the task they'd set out to do today had been completed. They...
Dazai's train of thought was interrupted by Atsushi's head resting on him shoulder. And... was that a snore? Was Atsushi snoring? Did he just pass out?
"Healing must take a lot out of him," Yosano said as she glanced back at him.
Honestly, it could be the healing. Or the impaling. Or the transforming. Atsushi fought hard. He deserved a good nap. Dazai just hadn't expected to become his pillow.
When Yosano turned back around to watch the passing scenery out the front windshield Dazai took the opportunity to shift and wrap his arm around the younger man, hoping for more physical contact. This had the unintended effect of Atsushi falling completely over and resting his head in Dazai's lap. Dazai froze momentarily, but the continued soft snoring assured him that Atsushi was still fast asleep.
He gently stroked Atsushi's uneven bangs, admiring the amazing person before him. Atsushi was ridiculously brave and selfless, determined, and downright adorable. Atsushi had been through hell, but he was spirited and too stubborn to give up. It was clear he didn't like himself very much, but that was ridiculous. He was incredible and deserved to be cherished. And right now he was Dazai's to cherish.
Well, that's unexpectedly sappy, Dazai thought to himself. He cringed at himself, not quite ready to get so sentimental so fast. He resigned himself to simply enjoying the touch without thinking about what it all meant. Right now her just enjoy the moment. He'd sort through those pesky emotions later.