Work Text:
You woke up with a startle, realizing you had fallen asleep against the papers spread on your desk. You could tell by the way the lighting in the room was dim that it was late in the day, possibly nearing the sunset. You scrambled to organize the papers and see how much you had accomplished before falling asleep, when you felt two hands rest on your shoulders.
You froze in the spot, trying to think who could be in your small apartment with you since you rarely let people in, when a voice came to you.
“Relax, my love. It’s just me.”
This was not the first time your boyfriend got into your small apartment, but didn’t mean that you were okay with it. When you were about to turn and tell him to leave, that he didn’t enter with your permission, he held you firmly in place.
“Calm down, you told me where you kept the spare key last week.”
You stopped for a moment, considered his words and tried to remember if they were true. Your mind was still fuzzy from the accidental nap, but after a few seconds you could remember it.
“Oh… What are you doing here? Don’t you have work at night?”
Dazai chuckled, “That you didn’t forget… I do, but I had a bit of time so I came to check on you. Though I think I should leave you alone to sleep a bit more.”
After saying these words, he drew back his hands from your shoulders. You were about to protest losing the warmth of his hands when he draped his coat over your shoulders.
“There, now you’ll be warm and safe while you sleep over your work~”
It was nice to have the warmth of his coat around you, very nice, but sometimes when Dazai spoke, you wanted to facepalm. Facedesk in this case, since your hands were occupied holding his coat. Instead of doing either of those, you chose to click your tongue.
“I can’t sleep, you know. I have deadlines.”
“Didn’t stop you from sleeping just now,” he countered.
“That—was an accident—”
“Sure, sure,” he said, and finally moved from behind you to enter your field of vision.
He seemed to be ignoring the fiery glare you were throwing at him as he walked through the room to lean on the wall across you, in front of your desk. He smiled at you and you chose to ignore him and go back to your papers.
You read the information in front of you but couldn’t make much sense of it. It seemed your mind was still a bit slow from the nap. Maybe you should start fixing your sleeping schedule; maybe it was impossible to do so now. College was a pain.
You were vaguely aware of Dazai’s stare, but when you looked up you found him staring at the window behind you instead. He didn’t seem to be much aware of your staring, so you took this rare moment to admire his features. You would never say this out loud, or you would risk poking the narcissist in Dazai, but he was beautiful. You were a bit entranced by his eyes, so when he stared directly into yours again, you almost jumped in your seat.
Dazai chuckled and you huffed, but instead of smiling and teasing you as always, his expression became serious, if not a bit conflicted. You waited patiently for him to speak again, which he did after a few moments of apparent inner monologue.
“Can you promise that you won’t freak out if I tell you something?” he asked, uncertain, eyes focused on your face and trying to decipher your emotions.
That was not a good way of starting a talk without making you freak out, and Dazai must’ve known that. You were more than a bit unsettled by his question, but still nodded.
It still took Dazai one whole minute to speak again, as it seemed he was still arguing with himself.
“Today is my birthday,” he finally spoke.
You stared at him, into his eyes, but he seemed to be ignoring your stare by looking out the window and to the sun that was now slowly setting. He didn’t seem to be joking.
Questions and thoughts crossed your mind. Why didn’t he tell you before? What kind of gift should you give him? Maybe he didn’t tell you because you hadn’t been together for too long? Wishing him only a happy birthday didn’t seem to be good enough… Maybe—
“Would you mind if I gave you a belated birthday gift? I didn’t have time to prepare anything,” was what you managed to say.
Dazai laughed and smiled at you, “I wouldn’t mind getting a kiss as a gift~”
You rolled your eyes at him, but got up from your seat. Before you could start walking to him however, he said, “But that was not what I had in mind.”
You stood in your place watching him, an eyebrow raised in inquiry.
“I wanted to ask you something.”
“You can ask,” you replied. If you were going to agree with his request was an entirely different matter.
“No need to be so defensive, my dear,” he said, and took a step away from the wall. You thought he would walk into your direction but he just stood in the middle of the room and extended a hand in your direction.
“Would you give me a dance?”
Your mouth opened slightly from surprise, but you closed it soon after. It was a sudden question, one that you didn’t know how to answer. You bit your lip and stared at him, thinking about what you should do.
“Dazai, I’m not the best dancer around here…”
He tilted his head to the left and his smile became a bit wider, “It’s my birthday request; you can’t say no.”
You huffed and crossed your arms. It was not like you couldn’t just kick him out of your apartment, but he was right in a way. It would be mean of you not to give in to his request.
You uncrossed your arms and sighed, “Fine, but do not blame me if I step on your toes.”
Dazai hummed and waited patiently for you to cross the room and go to him, which you did. Once you were close enough to him, you took his hand. He pulled you closer, adjusted the way he was holding your hand and looped an arm around your waist, resting his hand on the small of your back.
You blushed a little, given how close both of you were and how warm he was. He could’ve teased you about that—you know he could, because he had done it so many times you have lost the count—but he didn’t. Instead he held you in place, your bodies not touching but also not too far from each other.
The seconds stretched but none of you moved. You were worried that something was wrong, when you realized one thing.
“We don’t have music.”
Dazai closed his eyes, the smile never leaving his lips, and said, “Don’t worry, love. Leave it to me.”
Soon after, he started humming a tune; it sounded like a waltz. Dazai started moving and you moved along with him, eager to keep up with his pace. His steps were slow and precise. He guided both of you around the small room, taking care not to hit any furniture or walls.
It wasn’t as bad as you thought it would be. Dazai’s leading was careful and fluid, it wasn’t hard to keep up with his steps.
As the dance progressed your bodies got closer and closer, and Dazai had to pause his humming now and then to breathe. With each pause your steps would become slower, and the arm around your waist would pull you a bit closer. Until you weren’t moving around anymore, just standing and holding each other.
You wouldn’t complain about that. Not when Dazai’s arms were around you, hugging you as close to him as possible, the side of your face buried in his chest. Your eyes were closed too, as you were too focused on that moment, on Dazai’s heartbeat.
It was… peaceful.
The moment of silence was broken by a short hum coming from Dazai. You opened your eyes and looked up at his face. He was looking at you, a soft smile on his lips and warmth flooding his eyes.
“I have the best girlfriend,” he said.
You rolled your eyes and replied, “Lies.”
He chuckled but didn’t counter it, instead placing a kiss on your forehead, “I would like to stay, but I really need to go now.”
He sounded disappointed. You were disappointed too.
Your mind ran through the possibilities. You could do something, try anything to make him stay, but in the end you knew his work was important, and that you should go back to your tasks. You nodded to him, but almost whined when he pulled away from you, his warmth leaving your skin strangely cold.
He took a step back and looked you up and down, “The coat looks good on you. Maybe I should get you a matching one?”
You took his coat off your shoulders and handed it to him, “It’s your birthday, you shouldn’t be thinking of giving me gifts.”
He took the coat off your hands and placed it back on his shoulders, “It’s something to consider, love. You really do look good on it.”
It was always a bit hard to know when he was being sincere or not, but now it seemed he wasn’t trying to joke. You sighed and told him to go to work already, to which he didn’t reply, staring at you for a moment longer with that annoying but beautiful smile of his.
Dazai bid farewell and left you, and only once he was gone, you decided to search for a light switch. The sun’s last rays of light were almost gone on the horizon, and the night embraced the city.
The light startled you awake and you found yourself resting your head on your crossed arms. It seemed like you once again had slept on the table in your office. You sighed and mentally slapped yourself for not having a regular sleep schedule.
The good part was that now you didn’t have stacks of paper over your table, and your deadlines were so distant you could barely remember them. So different from your reality as a college student.
The lights in the office were programmed to activate on their own past a certain time, and if you were correct the sun had just started to set. You ran your hands down your face, tried to rid your mind of the confusion that came after a suddenly interrupted nap, and then looked at the digital clock on top of your table.
You weren’t incorrect; it was just the start of the nightfall. You were about to look away from the clock when the numbers switched to show the date.
It was that day of the year again. A strange longing took over your chest. You tried to push it away, but despite your best efforts nostalgia settled in.
It was the same day of the year, and just like last time, you had been awoken from an accidental nap. But this time you weren’t in your apartment, being instead in your office.
And Dazai…
Dazai wasn’t there.
You sighed again and pushed these thoughts away, instead focusing on gathering your things together to go home.
You had a vague idea you were dreaming about something before suddenly waking up. You had a vague idea of what it was about.
You were vaguely aware that you wished it wasn’t just a dream.