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The Doctor’s Return
She swallowed thickly, looking around the drab bathroom in the hotel room. How could she live without him? The scene at the beach kept replaying in her mind, over and over again:
“There’s five of us now. Mum, Dad, Mickey, and…the baby.”
He looked astonished. “You’re not?”
She’d sniffled, touching her stomach briefly. “Three months gone.”
His mouth dropped open. “Is…is it?” he questioned.
Nodding yes, her face crumpled but she regained her composure. “Y-you have to come back. Please come back. I-I can’t…”
“Rose…”
“Please?” she begged. “Doctor, I don’t…I can’t do this on my own.”
“Rose Tyler,” he said softly, and then faded away.
He’d just disappeared- vanished into thin air. There’d been no goodbye. She’d never see him again. Rose left out a little sob and sank to her knees on the tiled floor. If she carried on too much, her mum would be over and all she wanted was to be alone. That’s what she was; utterly and irrevocably alone.
True, her mum was next door, Mickey was right down the hall, and Pete was on his way, but… They weren’t him. She wanted him; no she needed him. Their baby needed him.
Someone knocked on the door and she sat up, wiping her face. She padded over to the door and it swung in. Mickey stood there, looking nervous.
“Pete’s here, in case you wanted to come over. We’re all in your mum’s room right now, discussing plans to leave in the morning.”
“Whatever you decide is fine,” she croaked out. “It doesn’t matter.” She struggled to keep from crying, but lost miserably and tried to close the door.
Mickey put his arm out, keeping the door open. He refused to allow her to shut herself off. She’d done this the first time, and it had almost killed them all. “C’mon, Rose,” he said softly. “At least come next door and talk to us.”
He heard her head thud lightly on the other side of the door. “Mickey, I-I can’t…”
Muffled whimpers came from the room and he pushed lightly on the door. She backed up, allowing him entrance, and she curled into him, openly weeping. “I-I-I th-thought he was coming to g-get me t-today.”
“Alright now,” Mickey said more confidently than he felt, “you know if there’s a way he’ll be back for you, Rose. C’mon. Dry those tears, alright? ‘S not good for you.”
“I don’t damn well care what’s good for me!” she sobbed, pushing him away. “I’m alone. Do you understand that? I’m alone.” She paused a moment and sank down to her knees.
“Rose. Tyler.” He spoke with force. “You are not alone. We’re all here for you. We’re not going anywhere. Come on, babe. Pull yourself together.”
She looked up at him in disbelief. “Don't stand there and tell me to pull it together!” She swallowed. “Get out. Now. Go, Mickey. Let me be.”
He sighed. “’M sending your mum over.”
“Just go!”
The door shut behind him and she instantly felt guilty. It wasn’t his fault. She sighed and rubbed the back of her neck, wishing she could erase the entire day. The sound was muffled, but she heard Mickey knocking on the room next door where her mother was staying. Swallowing thickly, she took a deep breath, trying to calm herself.
Quickly, Rose changed into pyjamas, turned out the light, and crawled into her bed. She wiped her face and tried to dry her tears. If she told her mum she was tired and wanted to rest, she might let her alone for the night. The black, dark, emptiness of the room suited her perfectly. It was exactly how she felt.
A soft knock came at the door and she braced herself. “Come in,” she said softly.
Instead of Jackie, Pete entered the room, looking a bit taken aback by the darkened room. “Mind if I turn this lamp on?” he asked.
“No,” she said and sniffled. “Go ahead.”
He clicked on the lamp and a soft warm glow filled the room. Pete found an upholstered chair in the corner of the room and pulled it across the carpet, settling down at her bedside. “Rose,” he began quietly, “I know how difficult today must have been for you. You were counting on going back with him, weren’t you?”
“Yeah,” she whispered.
“Your mum and I…we’re glad you’re still here.”
She sniffled. “I don’t think I can live without him.”
He put a hand on her shoulder. “It feels like that right now. It will for awhile. I felt the same way when I lost Jacks…”
Her lip trembled. “Please don’t hate me for sayin’ this, but I feel like it’d almost be easier if he’d died. H-he’s still out there, Pete. Alone. Like me.” Her face crumpled and she began crying the umpteenth time that night.
Silently, he handed her a tissue and waited for the tears to stop. The first few weeks back had been similar. When she’d discovered she was pregnant, it had started all over again. The happiest he’d seen her was the day before the trip to Norway, and now…now they seemed to be back at square one again. “I should think that might give you a great deal of hope, Rose,” he said wisely. “After all, as you said, he’s still out there. He knows you’re here.” His voice lowered. “He knows you’re expecting now, too, doesn’t he?”
She nodded mutely.
“That will give him some extra incentive to try and find a way through, don’t you think?”
“What if he can’t?” she asked in a small voice.
Pete squeezed her hand. “Then we’re always going to be right here for you, sweetheart. For both of you.”
“It just feels like there’s nothing left to fight for,” she said softly.
He nodded in understanding and cleared his throat. “It’s stuffy in here, Rose. D’you mind if I open the window? Fresh air from the ocean might do you a bit of good.”
She curled into a ball under the comforter. “Go ahead. ‘S fine.”
Rising from the chair, he walked across the room to the window that faced the beach. Carefully, Pete flipped the latches and raised the window a few inches, allowing the crisp air to enter the space. “The moon’s out tonight,” he said softly. “It’s reflecting off the waves and the wet sand on the beach. Why don’t you come see, sweetheart?”
Rose remained silent.
“Someone’s havin’ a bonfire down the beach a distance. I can just barely make out a little orange blaze. ‘S a nice night for that, don’t you think?” he asked her softly.
“Pete…”
“It’s alright to be sad, love. ‘M not asking you to give that up. I’m just trying to help.”
Rose licked her lips. “I know.”
He glanced back down. “The waves comin’ in right now are small. Seems like the weather’s calmed down a bit since earlier today.” He looked outside. “There’s even someone walking down the beach. Imagine that, Rose. Such a nice night, someone went out for a stroll.” He squinted. “Looks like he’s wearing a suit.”
Rose rolled over and sat upright. “A suit?”
Pete nodded. “Yeah, just wandering up and down the beach.”
She ran to the window, looking down. A thin man in slim fitting suit was walking down the beach, away from them. Could it be? Quickly pushing the window up the rest of the way, she shouted. “DOCTOR?”
The man on the beach stopped, and spun around.
“Doctor?!”
“Oh my God,” Pete murmured.
The slender figure started walking towards the hotel, limping slightly.
Rose ran out to the door, stubbing her toe on the door frame. “I’ve got to go, Pete. I have to.”
“Rose!” Pete said sharply.
She whirled around, her hand on the door frame.
“It might not be him. Stay here. I’ll go down. If it’s the Doctor, I’ll bring him up. It’s late and-”
“I’m coming with you.”
He put a hand on her shoulder. “Rose, if it’s him, I promise I’ll bring him right up. I want you to stay here…in case it isn’t.” He swallowed.
“Why?”
He spun around. “Because if it’s not the Doctor, I don’t want you running into the arms of a possible lunatic. You’re vulnerable right now; please. If it’s him, he’ll be here in a minute. Alright, Rose? Please. For the sake of the baby, stay here for now.”
“Go,” she said softly. “Hurry.”
He nodded. “I mean it, love. Stay here.”
“Okay.”
He took off down the hallway, shutting her door with a bang. Rose ran back to the window, scanning the shoreline for the shadowy stranger. He was closer now, still limping slightly. The waves broke softly on the beach, and she stared intently. Could it be him? Had he managed to come back?
A yellow rectangle of soft light appeared on the sand directly below her and she watched as Pete cautiously walked towards the man. Time stood painfully still when the two met. Rose had almost given up hope when Pete reached out and hugged the stranger.
She stood breathless, waiting by the door for them to return. The lift chimed softly and as the doors opened, Pete exited with the Doctor closely behind. She was frozen in place, not daring to hope that this was real, that he’d found a way to come back to her.
“Doctor?”
“Rose,” he gasped out, stumbling towards her.
“Easy, Rose,” Pete called out. “The Doctor had a rocky ride. He’s pretty banged up.”
She let out a little sob and padded down the hallway to him. His suit was singed on a few edges and one of the sleeves had a deep long gash in it. A bit of dried blood crusted the blue shirt to his arm. “Oh God,” she said softly. “Are you okay?”
He swallowed. “Oh, much better than okay.”
She carefully wrapped her arms around him. “But you’re hurt.”
The Doctor shook his head. “Most of it will be healed by morning. TARDIS had a bad time coming through the gap…or what was left of the gap.” He squeezed her hand.
“You’re here,” she whispered. “I didn’t think I’d ever see you again, but you’re here.”
Pete cleared his throat. “Rose, let’s help the Doctor back to my room so he can sit down. He’s been through a lot to get here to you.”
She looked Pete in the eye. “He’s stayin’ with me in my room.”
He glanced at the Doctor who nodded.
Pete cleared his throat. “Right then, let’s get him to your room.”
~OoO~
Jackie Tyler looked at the man who’d risked everything to make it back to her daughter. “Thank you,” she said softly.
“I did it for myself as much as for her, Jackie.”
“Are you taking her back?” she asked, tears in her eyes.
The Doctor ran a tired hand through his hair and made eye contact with Rose. “We can’t go back. That gap…actually I’m not quite sure how the TARDIS made it through. Logically, we shouldn’t have made it, but she is a trans-dimensional ship, so maybe she saw something I didn’t.” He swallowed thickly and stared out the beach. “She was on fire when we landed. As soon as I stepped out, the doors locked behind me. She’ll heal herself, of course, but…” He looked up at Rose and smiled. “This universe is going to have to be her new home as well as mine.”
Rose stood up, and padded softly across the room, looking out the window. She let out a tiny sob and then another. All eyes turned to her.
“C’mon,” said Pete softly. “I think they need a bit of time alone.”
Quietly, they slipped out of the room. The door creaked softly and clicked shut.
The Doctor stood up and joined her at the window.
Rose bit her lip and stared into his eyes. “I’m so sorry. I shouldn’t have told you. Now you’re stuck here, and…” She swayed a little. “It’s my fault.”
He put his hands on her shoulders, steadying her. “There’s nowhere else I’d rather be.” Gently, he rested a hand on her stomach. “Three months gone?” he questioned.
She nodded. “’s what they’re estimating.”
He gave her a warm smile. “The one adventure I thought I’d never have.”
She traced a finger along his jaw, reveling in his presence. “’M not dreaming, am I?”
He smiled and bent down, kissing her softly. “No, love. It’s not a dream.”
“I missed you. Oh, God, I’ve missed you.” She hugged him tight and started to cry.
He gently rubbed her back, feeling himself start to tear up as well. “I missed you, too, sweetheart.”
A light knock on the door caused them both to look up and Pete opened the door cautiously. “Sorry to interrupt,” he said softly, but I thought the Doctor might need something else to wear.” He held up a pair of pyjamas.
“Thanks, Pete.”
“Both of you, get some rest.” He gave the Doctor a pointed look. “I mean it. She’s not been well since you were separated and today’s been hard on her.” He shuffled his feet. “It can’t have been easy for you, either. You’ve got lots of time to catch up. So…bed. Please.”
The Doctor nodded, looking carefully at Rose. “Of course, Pete. I’ll take care of her.”
He nodded. “Good night. Sleep as long as you need to, both of you. I can arrange for the zeppelin to get us any time.”
Rose nestled next to the Doctor, threading her fingers through his. Her head rested on his chest, reveling in the double heartbeat. She sighed softly. If today had been hell, this night, surely, must be heaven.
“Is the TARDIS okay?” she asked softly.
His chest rumbled as he cleared his throat. “She will be. Sustained a lot of damage coming through, but she’ll fix herself up. I’m more concerned about you.”
“I’m fi-”
“You’re not fine, sweetheart. You’ve lost at least a stone since we were separated.”
“It’s been hard…”
“You have to take care of yourself, Rose.”
“But you’re back now. That makes all the difference, don’t you see? You’re back and we’re not alone; either of us. So I am fine. Honestly.”
She felt him exhale slowly and consider what she’d said. After a few moments, he said softly, “So, better with two, then?”
Rose rolled on her back and pulled his hand so it was resting on her stomach. “Even better with three?”
He kissed her cheek. “Absolutely, love. Absolutely.”