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2017-06-30
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as far as we can

Summary:

“Hinata’s cute,” Noya says, matter of fact.

“Kageyama’s cute too,” Hinata blurts out, all eyes now on him. If he wasn’t completely mortified, he would have snuck a glance at Kageyama and seen that his cheeks had gone red.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

 “Out of everyone here, I’m the most likely to get a girlfriend,” Noya comments proudly. “Or boyfriend,” he adds quickly.

Tanaka gasps, offended by Noya’s claim. “I woul—” he starts to counter, but Noya cuts him off.

“You’re second,” Noya tells him, and before Tanaka can argue, Noya goes on, “Kageyama is least likely.”

Kageyama scowls. “Why am I least likely? Hinata’s right there,” he says, nudging Hinata with his elbow.

“Hey!” Hinata protests, glaring at Kageyama.

“Hinata’s cute,” Noya says, matter of fact.

“Kageyama’s cute too,” Hinata blurts out, all eyes now on him. If he wasn’t completely mortified, he would have snuck a glance at Kageyama and seen that his cheeks had gone red.

Before Hinata has a chance to blab out something that’ll probably only embarrass him further, Noya counters with, “But he’s scary.”

He’s not that scary, Hinata thinks, but he keeps it to himself.

Last year, Hinata would have agreed with Noya in an instant, but things have changed since then.

Kageyama is no longer some looming force. He’s no longer some commanding king.

Now, Kageyama is a teammate. He’s a friend. He’s human, and while he still sometimes feels like they're in competition, he’s no longer scary.

Hinata’s not really sure when it happened, when he stopped seeing Kageyama as something to be scared of and started seeing him and someone he can count on to push him forward.

Maybe it was all the hours studying together, or the days they stayed late after practice, or the first time Kageyama met his family. Maybe it was all the times they’ve eaten lunch together.

Maybe it was everything.

He doesn't get to think about it any further because suddenly he’s being jabbed in the side by Noya.

“Ow!” He yells, batting away Noya’s arm. “What was that for?”

When he looks around the circle, he realizes all eyes are once again on him. He didn’t even do anything this time! His eyes land on Kageyama, who looks like he wants to flee the scene. That’s not unusual for Kageyama.

“Kageyama said you guys are dating!” Noya exclaims, and Hinata is certain that he heard wrong.

But then seconds later there’s Kageyama’s voice saying, “I know we said we wanted to wait to tell them, but they would have found out anyway.”

Hinata just stares, expression shocked, eyes wide open. Kageyama is staring back, far too intently for Hinata’s liking, and he seems to be saying please go along with it.

There’s a hundred things that could go wrong with this plan, but Hinata still finds himself saying, “Sorry we didn’t tell you sooner.”

Some of the intensity leaves Kageyama’s expression, replaced by relief. Hinata’s face stays in a state of shock.

“Don’t tell the rest of the team,” Kageyama tells Noya and Tanaka, and they nod their heads while going off about how great this is, and how they should have seen it coming.

Hinata’s too busy watching Kageyama to pay any attention to them, too busy trying to calm the fast paced beating of his heart.

 

 

 

After what feels like an excruciatingly long practice, and embarrassing himself a few more times than he usually does, practice finally comes to an end, and Hinata can finally find out what the hell Kageyama was thinking.

“Kageyama!” Hinata yells, chasing after him as he exists the clubroom. “Why did you tell Noya we’re dating?!”

Kageyama’s cheeks color slightly, and he avoids Hinata’s gaze. “Sorry,” he starts, and that’s definitely something, since Hinata isn’t used to hearing those words from him. “It was just annoying that he didn’t think I could get a girlfriend or a boyfriend or something.”

Hinata’s forehead crinkles in confusion. “I didn’t think you cared about that kind of stuff.”

“I don’t,” Kageyama argues. “I was just caught up in the moment. We can just tell them we broke up in like a week and that’ll be the end of it.”

Hinata wants to pretend he doesn't know why that idea doesn't sit right with him, but he’s not oblivious to his own growing feelings.

“Okay,” he agrees, because the only other option is to tell Noya and Tanaka that Kageyama was lying and he’s definitely not about to do that.

“Really?” Kageyama asks, sounding surprised.

Hinata nods, and then a grin takes over his face. “Have a good night, boyfriend.”

Kageyama rolls his eyes, groaning. “I’m going to regret this, aren’t I?”

“Probably,” Hinata answers, waving before he heads off in a different direction.

This’ll be fun, Hinata tells himself. That’s easier than giving into the heaviness in his chest.

 

 

 

Hinata suspects something's up when he walks into the clubroom the next morning and all conversation comes to a halt.

He knows something’s up when Kageyama comes in right after him, and everyone in the room either hurries to avert their eyes, or keeps staring, like they’re waiting for something to happen.

Kageyama, who doesn’t seem to notice the weirdness of his teammates, nudges Hinata to the side. “Are you just gonna stand there all morning?”

That kicks Hinata into action. “No!” he says, following after Kageyama, ignoring the eyes that follow them. Hinata’s heart takes a few nervous beats. This can only mean one thing.

They know .

Well, they don’t actually know anything, since Hinata and Kageyama definitely aren’t dating, but everyone seems to be acting like something is going on between them, and that’s the only thing that makes any sense.

Hinata should have known this was a horrible idea. They can play it off as a joke, tell the team they wanted to see how many people who believe it.

That’s not such a bad idea, and there’s no reason for anyone to doubt it. They play jokes on each other all the time, that’s part of being a team.

Hinata pulls his shirt on over his head and lets out a determined breath. They can get through this practice with everyone thinking they’re together, and then they’ll put this mess behind them.

 

 

 

Practice, thankfully, passes with minimal stares. It’s afterwards that doesn’t go as smoothly.

Hinata falls into step with Kageyama as they make their way to the clubroom, and then he grabs hold of his arm and whispers, “Wait.”

Kageyama stops, and turns, rightfully confused. “What are you doing?”

Hinata notices the way Yamaguchi throws a glance their way, like he’s curious as to what’s going on. He resists the urge to groan out loud. Yamaguchi is the only one who knows about Hinata’s crush on Kageyama, well, except Kenma, but Kenma’s too far away to count.

“They all think we’re dating!” Hinata explains, throwing his arms out in distress.

Kageyama blinks, and then everything seems to click, and he looks slightly horrified and also a little constipated.

“No one has said anything,” Kageyama says, and Hinata drops his arms to his side.

“They’ve been staring at us!”

“That doesn’t mean anything.”

Kageyama .”

Kageyama sighs. “Okay. We’ll tell them I was lying.”

Hinata shakes his head, maybe a little too fast. “We don’t have to do that,” he tells Kageyama, who looks visibly confused. “We can tell them it was a joke. We wanted to see how many people would believe it, or something.”

Kageyama stares at him for a moment, and then he shakes the surprise. “Okay. Should we tell them now?”

Hinata half shrugs. “Uhh… no better time than the present, I guess?”

Kageyama nods, and then starts walking towards the clubroom, Hinata following not far behind.

This shouldn’t be making him nervous, but his heart’s beating a few paces faster than usual, and his fingers keep fiddling with the edges of his shirt.

This would be funny, if it wasn’t for the fact that his feelings for Kageyama aren’t just a joke.

He sighs to himself, too quiet for Kageyama to catch, and then walks into the clubroom after his friend.

Hinata rubs his palms against his sides, though the motion is pretty much useless because he knows the sweat will be back shortly.

It feels like he’s about to confess to someone, which is pretty much the opposite of what he’s actually doing, but now that people have thought of them as a couple, maybe they’ll start to catch onto Hinata’s feelings.

And if they catch on…

How long before Kageyama notices?

Hinata lets out a quiet breath, closing his eyes tightly and giving his head a quick shake.

He always knew he’d have to tell Kageyama one day, he’s just not ready for that day to be soon, and he’s definitely not ready for Kageyama to find out on his own. Hinata would prefer to have control of the situation.

“You okay?” Kageyama whispers, appearing at side. Hinata’s heart jumps, but luckily, the rest of him manages to stay still.

Hinata nods. “Yeah, sorry, got lost in thought.”

Kageyama rolls his eyes, but there’s no annoyance to it. He’s used to Hinata getting lost in his mind, usually caught up thinking about volleyball. They’re the same in that way.

“So…?” Kageyama trails off, but he doesn't have to finish the question for Hinata to know what he’s asking.

Hinata nods again, sucking in a breath before he steps onto one of the benches. He might as well get everyone’s attention at once.

“So, I guess you all know about me and Kageyama,” Hinata starts, and now all eyes are on him. He’d rather have all eyes on him during a game, somehow that feels like less pressure. Well, maybe not less pressure, but definitely less scary.

There’s a long silence that follows, and then Tsukishima gives a half assed glare. “No one cares about your love life, Hinata. Just keep it off the court.”

He’d had a small speech on his tongue about how haha, we got everyone to think we were dating , but the speech dies before it gets a chance to come out.

Obviously Tsukishima wouldn’t care, but the rest of the team seems to be in agreement, and no one even wishes them well or something lame like that! Isn’t that what you’re supposed to do when people you know get in a relationship? Say you’re happy for them?

Hinata glances over to Kageyama, who’s looking at him expectantly, and then Ennoshita pulls his attention back.

“We’re all happy for you, but if this ends badly, we don’t want it to affect the team.”

He knows it’s stupid, and he knows Ennoshita is only trying to be a good coach, but the word's light this fire in Hinata, like he has something to prove.

They got the ‘I’m happy for you,’ at least.

“Obviously we won’t let it affect the team,” Hinata says, which is definitely not what he’d been planning when he stepped onto the bench.

There’s a few mumbles and nods among the team, and then they all go back to what they were doing, and Hinata is left standing on the bench, slightly stunned by his own actions.

This time, the only person he has to blame is himself and his stupid need to prove everyone wrong.

There’s a cough below him, and Hinata looks down to see Kageyama, confusion written all over his face. Hinata smiles sheepishly.

“I… uh…” He tries. Why don’t words ever come when he needs them?

“You…?” Kageyama questions, waiting for some sort of explanation.

“Meet me during lunch!” Hinata squeaks and then hurries off the bench, rushing to the opposite end of the clubroom to get changed as quickly as he possibly can.

They always meet at lunch anyway, Hinata thinks to himself as he’s wiggling into his pants.

 

 

 

By the time lunch rolls around, Hinata’s brain is a jumble of leftover embarrassment and math equations.

He’s not as nervous to talk to Kageyama as he had been, but his palms are still sweating at his side. At least this time he’ll actually be able to form words.

Probably.

He’s not surprised when he sees Kageyama already at their table. All of his attention seems to be focused on sucking at the straw of his boxed milk.

Hinata pushes away the quiet voice in his head that’s whispering cute .

Now is not the time to think about how cute Kageyama looks drinking his dumb milk.

Hinata takes a determined breath and then closes the distance between them. Kageyama’s head pops up right as Hinata appears, taking the seat in front of him.

“Hey,” Hinata says, like he hadn’t run off a couple hours earlier.

“Hey,” Kageyama says back, his face blank. He’s waiting for Hinata to bring it up.

Well, fine. Two can play at that game. Hinata opens his lunchbox before glancing back up to Kageyama. “How was class?” He asks, even though he knows the answer already.

He always asks, and Kageyama always gives the same answer.

“Fine.”

One day, Kageyama had said ‘okay’ instead of ‘fine’ and Hinata had spent the rest of lunch pestering Kageyama, joking that something must have happened if things were now okay , and not just fine .

Since then, he’s never wavered from ‘fine.’

They fall to silence after that, which isn’t unfamiliar for them. Lunch is often spent in silence, but it stopped being awkward sometime last year.

Sometimes Yamaguchi and Tsukishima will join them for lunch, which usually results in Kageyama and Tsukishima sitting around awkwardly, staring at their food while Yamaguchi and Hinata talk about anything and everything.

The silence today, however, isn’t as comfortable as they’re used to. It’s a silence that waits to be broken.

Hinata pulls out his phone and types out a message to Kenma. If he distracts himself, he won’t have to surrender to the awkwardness.

Hinata → Kenma: kenmaaaa

Kenma → Hinata: what

Hinata → Kenma: i’m bored

Kenma → Hinata: aren't you at school?

Hinata → Kenma: soooo?

Kenma → Hinata: fine. why are you bored?

Hinata → Kenma: because i can’t talk to kageyama

Kenma → Hinata: why can’t you talk to kageyama?

Hinata → Kenma: because then i would have to explain why i let everything think we’re dating…

Kenma → Hinata: wait what? clearly i’m missing something here

Hinata → Kenma: arahghgg

Hinata → Kenma: kageyama told noya and tanaka we were dating because they were being annoying and then they told everyone so we were gonna play it off as a joke and then i

Hinata → Kenma: kind of told everyone we were dating

Kenma → Hinata: if you’re not dating why did you tell people you are?

Hinata → Kenma: uhhhgggh

Hinata → Kenma: idk kenma!!! they told us not to let it affect the team and like obviously if we were dating we wouldn’t let it affect the team!!

Hinata → Kenma: but they were acting like we were gonna break up and stuff and it was annoying!!

Kenma → Hinata: so you wanted to prove them wrong?

Hinata → Kenma: yeah…

Kenma → Hinata: kageyama doesn’t know that you like him, does he?

Hinata → Kenma: no…

Hinata → Kenma: i’m not ready to tell him >:(

Kenma → Hinata: i understand that, but if you’re pretending to date him it’s going to be a lot harder to hide your feelings

Hinata → Kenma: aahahhhhh

Hinata → Kenma: idk what to do

Kenma → Hinata: i think a good first step would be to stop ignoring kageyama

Hinata → Kenma: ur not help :(((

Kenma → Hinata: i know. good luck.

Hinata sighs aloud, catching Kageyama’s attention. He knows that Kenma is right. Ignoring the situation is only going to make it worse.

“I’m sorry,” Hinata says, because he figures that’s a good place to start.

Kageyama looks relieved that they’re finally talking. “You don’t have to be sorry,” he tells him. “I’m just confused.”

Hinata sighs again. “I was going to tell them it was a joke,” Hinata explains, “And then, I don’t know, they were acting like our relationship was doomed or something. All anyone really said is to not let it affect the team, and it just sounded like they expected us to break up, and I know I was probably being dumb and reading into it, but the words came out before I could stop them.”

“That seems to happen a lot to you,” Kageyama says, and Hinata is about to protest, and then the corner of his lip pulls up and Hinata just rolls his eyes, throwing his head back with a groan.

“Shut up. You’re a bully,” Hinata says, attempting to repress a smile, and then a new thought occurs. “So, now that we’re dating, or, I mean, fake dating, we have to act like… a couple, right?”

Hinata feels an awkwardness settle back into the air, though not as thick as before. It’s easier when they’re on the same page. (Or at least, a similar page. If they were on the same page, Kageyama would know about Hinata’s feelings.)

“Yeah, uh, we can probably just act the same for the most part,” Kageyama says, avoiding Hinata’s eyes. “I’d probably act the same if we were dating anyway, so…” Kageyama trails off, and it’s probably a good thing he doesn’t say anything else, because the sound of his heart beating is blocking out everything else.

Hinata does not want to imagine what kind of boyfriend Kageyama would be. He definitely doesn’t want to think about it while Kageyama is sitting across from him.

“The same,” Hinata agrees, nodding. “Yeah, that sounds good. That’s easy. I like that.” Stop talking.

Kageyama nods as well, and then the bell rings, and for once Hinata finds himself grateful.

 

 

 

By the end of practice, Hinata’s not sure why he’d made such a big deal about this in the first place.

The team doesn’t say anything, and Kageyama and Hinata act like they’ve always acted, and everything goes fine.

Well, almost everything. Yamaguchi keeps throwing Hinata weird looks, which means he wants an explanation, and Hinata keeps dodging them.

He wants to tell Yamaguchi the truth, which means waiting until sometime that isn’t practice.

Yamaguchi tosses him another look as practice ends and the second years get put in charge of putting away the equipment, and just like the others, Hinata ignores it.

It’s a lot harder to ignore when Yamaguchi comes up next to him, picking up volleyballs as they walk.

“So you didn’t think to tell me that you and Kageyama started dating?” Yamaguchi asks, and Hinata can hear the hurt in his voice.

“It’s not like that!” Hinata whisper shouts. “I… what are you doing after practice?”

“Nothing,” Yamaguchi tells him, dropping the volleyballs into the ball cart.

“If you call me when you get home, I’ll tell you everything,” Hinata offers, guilt gnawing at him uncomfortably.

Yamaguchi pauses, and then he nods. “Okay… you know you can tell me anything, right? I’m not gonna judge you, Hinata.”

The guilt grows. “I know! You’re like, my best friend, other than Kageyama,” Hinata tells him.

“You’re my best friend, too,” Yamaguchi says, “other than Tsukki.”

Hinata smiles, and then grabs the ball cart and starts rolling it towards the equipment closet. “Good.”

They walk to the clubroom together, and then before separating Yamaguchi says, “I’ll call you tonight.”

Hinata nods. “And I’ll explain everything!”

He watches Yamaguchi walk off towards Tsukishima, and then catches Kageyama’s eye when he turns his head.

Hinata smiles, walking towards him.

“That went well,” Hinata whispers once he’s at Kageyama’s side.

Kageyama nods in agreement before pulling his shirt off, replacing it with a cleaner one.

Hinata does the same, and as he’s putting on his pants, he registers Kageyama waiting to the side.

They wait for each other most days, even if they only have a few minutes before they have to separate.

“We should practice that serve more tomorrow,” Kageyama says once they’re outside, and this is the kind of conversation that Hinata always welcomes.

“I’m finally getting it,” Hinata tells him proudly, and Kageyama nods, which Hinata takes to mean that he agrees.

“We can meet at school early tomorrow morn—”

“Okay!” Hinata agrees before Kageyama gets a chance to finish. He’ll never turn down an opportunity to practice.

“An hour early?” Kageyama asks.

Hinata wouldn’t mind going two hours early, but he knows that’s pushing it. There’s a difference between working hard and overworking, and Hinata has to make sure not to cross that line.

So he nods. “That sounds good.”

 

 

 

When Hinata finally makes it home, he goes straight for his room and collapses onto the bed, exhausted. It’s been a long day.

He still has homework, but maybe he can do it at lunch tomorrow, or between classes, or—

His phone starts ringing.

Right. Yamaguchi. He’d forgotten.

He pulls his phone from his pocket, letting out a yawn before he accepts the call and presses the phone to his ear.

Before Yamaguchi has time for a greeting, Hinata says, “We’re not actually dating.”

The other end of the line is silent for a moment, and then Yamaguchi finds his words.

“You’re gonna have to give me more than that.”

Hinata sighs dramatically, scootching back on his bed so he can rest his head against the pillow. “Kageyama told Noya and Tanaka we were dating because they said Kageyama would be least likely to get a girlfriend or boyfriend, and I went along with it because I’m an awesome friend, and we were gonna just tell them we broke up in like a week and then they told everyone, so we couldn’t.”

Hinata pauses to take a breath, and then goes immediately back to his explanation. It feels good to get it all out, and not just through text.

“And then we decided to tell everyone it was a joke and that we just wanted to see how many people would believe us, but ughhh,” Hinata groans. “It seemed like everyone thought we were gonna end up breaking up, and I was annoyed that people thought we’d break up… if we were together.”

Hinata takes another breath, but this time he doesn’t keep talking. Instead, he waits for Yamaguchi to say something.

“Wow,” is all Yamaguchi has for him.

“I know,” Hinata says.

“So…” Yamaguchi starts, “you’re pretending to date the guy you have a crush on?”

Hinata groans again. “Yes. Ugh.”

“I don’t see what could go wrong there,” Yamaguchi says.

Hinata rolls his eyes. “I think Tsukki’s sarcasm is rubbing off on you.”

Yamaguchi laughs, and a silence follows, and then, “I know you didn’t ask for my advice, but I think you should tell Kageyama you like him.”

“You know I’m not ready,” Hinata says, his heart rate picking up at the thought.

“Are you ever gonna be ready?” Yamaguchi asks.

“I—” Hinata pauses. “I don’t know.”

“It’d be better to do it now, before things get messy.”

It’s good advice, and Kenma basically told him the same thing, but it’s not that easy.

“I don’t want to ruin things,” Hinata says. “We’re friends now. We're best friends. I’m not even sure how that happened, but I don’t want to mess it up.”

“It’s your decision, but Hinata, Kageyama cares about you. If he doesn’t feel the same, I don’t think he’d let it get between you guys.”

Hinata taps his fingers against the bed, sighing. He’s been doing a lot of that today.

“I know, I know—argh. This sucks.”

“Crushes are like that.”

Hinata takes that as his chance to steer the conversation elsewhere. “ You would know .”

“Oh, wow, it’s getting late, I should go!” Yamaguchi rushes to get out, and before Hinata has a chance to pester him further, the line goes empty.

Hinata glances to his backpack, sitting at the end of his bed. Homework can wait.

 

 

 

A week passes, and everything is pretty much back to normal. Other than the occasional joking comment from a teammate, it’s easy to forget everyone thinks they’re dating.

The one major difference, however, is that now Hinata can’t stop thinking about what would happen if they actually were a couple.

Would anything change? They already spend most of their time together. They practice together, eat lunch together, and do homework at Hinata’s house on the weekends together.

If they were dating, they’d probably kiss. Hinata’s face feels warm at the thought, and he tries to shove it far, far away. School is not a good place to think about what it would be like to kiss Kageyama.

Hinata drops his head onto his desk with a quiet thump, earning him a disapproving look from his teacher and a, “Hinata, pay attention!”

He does his best to listen.

 

 

 

“We’re going out,” Noya informs, appearing at Hinata’s side out of nowhere while he’s getting dressed.

“Where are we going?” Hinata asks, not bothering with any sort of argument. There’s no reason he wouldn’t want to hang out with Noya.

“The movies,” Noya says, “There’s this cool new action movie. You, me, Tanaka and Kageyama, of course.” He grins. “Can’t forget about your boyfriend.”

Hinata stills for a moment. If they go out, that means they would actually have to make an effort to be a couple. At least, he’s pretty sure that’s what it means. Would they have to hold hands? Or put their arms around each other during the movie? Hinata’s not sure he’d be able to concentrate if he had Kageyama’s arm around hi—

“Hellllooo, Hinata? Are you listening to me?”

“Yeah!” Hinata squeaks. “Movie! Sounds good! When?”

“This weekend,” Noya says, and Hinata nods.

“Cool!”

“Tell Kageyama.”

“Okay!”

The four of them have hung out before. This won’t be that different… right?

 

 

 

They meet at a park a few blocks from the theater, and to his relief, when he arrives, Kageyama is the only one there.

“Hey,” Hinata greets, taking in Kageyama’s appearance. He’s wearing black jeans and a red sweater and ugh , he shouldn’t be allowed to look good in casual clothes.

“Hey,” Kageyama says back. He’s wearing a slightly conflicted expression, and Hinata wonders if this is too much for him. Pretending to be boyfriends when they don’t have to act like boyfriends is one thing, this is another.

“We can tell them the truth,” Hinata offers, “If you’re uncomfortable.”

Kageyama’s forehead scrunches together, and then he shakes his head. “I’m not uncomfortable.”

“Are you sure?”

“Yes. Are you uncomfortable?”

“No.”

“Okay.”

Hinata lets a silent sit between them for a moment, and then he opens his big mouth to ask, “Should we hold hands?”

Kageyama looks slightly taken aback by the question, but he recovers quickly. “I don’t know…”

“You could put your arm around me during the movie,” Hinata suggests, heart pounding, even though he knows it’s a horrible idea.

Kageyama seems hesitant, and Hinata is about to back track, and then he asks, “You’d be okay with that?”

Hinata resists the urge to let out a sigh of relief. Instead, he nods. “Yeah, I wouldn’t mind.”

“Okay,” Kageyama says, “I’ll do that then.”

Noya and Tanaka show up soon after, saving them from any further awkwardness.

 

 

 

It’s just an arm.

Hinata’s a touchy person. He’s used to having arms around him. What he’s not used to, however, is having Kageyama’s arm around him.

What he’s not used to is the way it

makes his insides feel like mush and his heart feel like a heater.

He has his eyes glued to the screen. He’d already spared one glance Kageyama’s way and that had resulted in pink cheeks. The last thing he wants is to get caught blushing while Kageyama has his arm around him.

 

 

 

“That was awesome!” Noya exclaims once they leave the theater, and Hinata, despite not having kept up with the plot, had seen enough explosions to agree.

“I know! It was like boom! And then wam! And the main character totally kicked ass!” Hinata says, jumping from excitement, though he’s not sure if it’s more from the movie or from the arm that had been around him.

Tanaka goes off about how cute one of the girls had been, and Hinata takes that as a chance to nudge Kageyama and ask, “What did you think?”

“It was okay,” Kageyama replies, voice quiet. It’s the first thing he’s said since they left the theater.

Hinata’s about to ask another question when Noya’s voice interrupts him.

“You guys ready to leave?”

“Yeah,” Hinata and Kageyama answer in unison.

Noya and Tanaka both awww at them, causing Hinata’s cheeks to color slightly. And then, once that’s over with (thankfully), Noya asks, “You guys are taking the train, right?”

Hinata glances to Kageyama. “I was thinking we could walk,” he suggests.

“Sure,” Kageyama agrees without much hesitation. “I wouldn’t mind walking.”

“Wellll,” Noya starts, “We’ll see you Monday then!”

“Have a good weekend,” Tanaka adds, wiggling his eyebrows.

Hinata feels the warmth return to his face, and he stares at the ground for a few moments, waiting for the embarrassment to be less obvious on his face.

“Was there any reason you wanted to walk?” Kageyama asks, causing Hinata to lift his gaze, despite the fact that he’s almost certain he’s still blush—

So is Kageyama!

Kageyama is blushing too, Hinata notices the moment his eyes land on his face.

It’s barely noticeable, but it’s still there, and it’s annoyingly cute, which is something Kageyama seems to be good at.

Kageyama’s forehead scrunches slightly, and that’s when Hinata remembers that he’d asked a question. Right!

“Um,” Hinata starts, letting out a small breath. “I guess I just thought the fresh air would be nice?”

 

 

 

An hour and a half later, they’re laying in Hinata’s room, Hinata on his bed and Kageyama on the guest futon.

“I had fun today,” Hinata says, staring at the ceiling. He’s glad it’s dark in the room.

“So did I,” Kageyama tells him, and Hinata tries not to read into it.

He knows that Yamaguchi and Kenma are right. He should tell Kageyama how he feels. He’s just… scared.

He never would have imagined that they’d end up here, friends, best friends, falling asleep in the same room like it’s normal.

He used to think they’d always be fighting, always be rivals in some way, always be competing.

They’re still competitive, but it’s different now, and yeah, sometimes they fight, but they always work it out. Now, if something's going on, they can talk.

So, they should be able to talk now. Hinata should be able to bring up his feelings without being so afraid, but he can’t help it.

Part of him is scared because he doesn't want to lose what they have now, but… the other part is scared by the likelihood of nothing changing.

He knows Kageyama won’t stop being his friend, but if he doesn’t feel the same, it’ll hurt. Hinata doesn’t want that confirmation. He likes the possibility, the chance, even if it feels slim.

But he can’t hide forever.

Eventually, he had to accept things the way they are, even if he doesn’t like the reality.

That eventually might as well be now.

Hinata sucks in a breath, closing his eyes as he lets it out. “Kageyama,” he starts softly, “Why did you say you were dating me? You could have said anyone.”

There’s silence from the futon, and that’s okay, Hinata wasn’t really asking to get an answer, he just needed a segway into what he’s about to say.

“Because..” Hinata clenches his fists at his side before stretching out his fingers and lifting them up, only to drop his arms back onto his bed seconds later. “Aragh. It’s like, okay, do you remember this summer? When we were playing volleyball in my backyard? And my mom made us lemonade?” Hinata doesn’t expect an answer, and he doesn’t wait for one.

“You tossed the ball to me, and I hit it, and you tossed another, and I hit that one too, and you kept making tosses and I kept hitting them and it felt really good. It felt like, I don’t know. I felt alive, I guess.

And I realized that I feel like that a lot with you, and not just on the court. Sometimes I feel that way when we’re doing homework in my room and you have your knee against mine. I didn’t know what it was at first. I thought—I thought maybe it was because I was still getting used to being close to you, but that wasn’t it because even when being close to you started to feel normal, the feelings were still there and then I talked to Yamaguchi and—”

Hinata pauses, his heart pounding. He’s made it this far, he can make it one more sentence.

He takes a breath, let's it out slowly.

“Yamaguchi told me I had a crush on you,” Hinata says, “and he was right.”

Kageyama is silent, and somehow, Hinata’s heart manages to beat faster. He feels nauseous from the swirling in his stomach, from the nerves.

His eyes are glued to the ceiling. This is it. This is how he dies.

“I said I was dating you because I thought it would be believable,” Kageyama says suddenly, and Hinata’s heart stops.

“I’m not… I don’t have that many friends. I’ve never had a best friend before you. You’re the person that I’m always with, that I talk to. If I was dating anyone, it’d be you.”

Hinata feels frozen. He’s not entirely sure what Kageyama is trying to say, but it sounds a lot like ‘You’re my best friend and I care about you but not like that.’

And that’s… fine. That’s okay. That’s what he expected. Now he can move on. Now he can accept that all they’ll ever be is friends, and he’s fine with that, as long as he always has Kageyama in his life, tossing to him. As long as Kageyama is his best friend. As long as—

“I’m new to friends, and feelings beyond that… I don’t really understand them, or know how to recognize them, but…”

But . Hinata’s eyes widen, and once again, his heart goes off.

“When I had my arm around you in the theater, it felt nice. It’s kind of like how you described, feeling alive. I feel that, too, when I’m with you. So I—I think I like you too.”

Hinata lets out a breath. “You think?”

“I’m sorry that I can’t give you more than that,” Kageyama says, and he really does sound sorry.

Hinata shakes his head, even though Kageyama can’t see the action. “No, no, it’s okay—I’m—ah—we can figure this out together.”

“How are we gonna do that?” Kageyama asks.

Hinata’s eyes move from the ceiling as he rolls onto his side. “I don’t know,” he admits.

“Me either.”

“So… I guess… we’re like… best friends, who are fake dating, who might like each other,” Hinata says, and then smiles at how ridiculous that sounds.

Kageyama is quiet for a moment, and then he says, “We should go on a date.”

Hinata splutters before finally managing to get out, “Okay! Yeah! Sure! That sounds cool!”

“Tomorrow,” Kageyama suggests.

“Okay,” Hinata agrees, because what else is he going to say?! Nothing!

Kageyama sighs, quiet enough that Hinata barely registers it. “Thank you for,” there’s a short pause before he continues with, “being my friend. I’m sorry I can’t give you more.”

“You don’t have to apologize,” Hinata tells him, and then, “We should probably sleep.” A small grin makes it’s way to his face. “Wouldn’t want to be tired for our date tomorrow.”

“Goodnight, Hinata.”

“Goodnight, Kageyama.”

Hinata rolls to his other side, grabbing his blanket and hugging it closer to him. He’s not sure what’s going to happen between them, but he knows that whatever it is, they’ll be okay.

If they could overcome a rivalry, dealing with their feelings shouldn’t be that hard.

 

 

 

Hinata wakes up a little past eight in the morning, which is way too early to be awake on the weekend, but he’s having no luck falling back to bed, so instead, he grabs his phone from the nightstand.

If he doesn’t tell someone about what happened, he’s going to burst.

Hinata → Kenma: kenma

Hinata → Kenma: kenmaaaaa

Hinata → Kenma: kenma answer me i need you :((

Kenma → Hinata: what

Hinata → Kenma: KENMA

Hinata → Kenma: oh

Hinata → Kenma: hey

Kenma → Hinata: hey

Hinata → Kenma: i told kageyama i like him

Hinata → Kenma: as more than a friend

Kenma → Hinata: i’m glad you finally told him

Kenma → Hinata: you seem okay so i’m assuming it went well?

Hinata → Kenma: we’re going on a date today

Hinata → Kenma: i told him last night

Hinata → Kenma: AAAAAA

Hinata → Kenma: kenma why do u love so far away i need someone to hug me

Hinata → Kenma: oops i mean live

Hinata → Kenma: he said he’s not sure if he likes me

Hinata → Kenma: but he thinks he does

Hinata → Kenma: i’m trying not to get my hopes up

Kenma → Hinata: i hope the day goes well

Kenma → Hinata: you and kageyama will be okay no matter what happens

Kenma → Hinata: kuro needs my help with something so i have to go but let me know how it goes

Hinata → Kenma: bye kenma!!!!

Hinata → Kenma: thanks for letting me talk about this stuff

Hinata → Kenma: have fun with kuro ;3

Kenma → Hinata: please don't ever use that face again

Kenma → Hinata: goodbye

Hinata lets his phone drop onto his chest as he exhales quietly. He’s going on a date with Kageyama. He’s going on a date with Kageyama!

Okay, he’s kind of freaking out now.

There’s no reason to overthink this. Kageyama is his best friend, they hang out all the time. This won’t be that different.

Even so, he can’t help the nerves swelling up within him, and the way he starts to doubt every little action he makes. Kageyama isn’t even awake yet.

Hinata shakes his head, peeking over the side of his bed to see Kageyama sleeping peacefully on the futon. He should probably wake him soon.

He might as well take a shower first.

 

 

 

Ten minutes later, Hinata’s walking back into his room, towel halfway on his head, halfway draping down his shoulder.

It only takes him a moment to see Kageyama sitting up on the futon, eyes now on Hinata.

Hinata thinks his cheeks pick up a little color, but that could just be his imagination.

“Good morning,” Kageyama says.

“Morning,” Hinata says back, the part of the towel that had been on his head falling to meet the other half on his shoulders. “My mom made breakfast.”

 

 

 

After breakfast, they spend a few hours in Hinata’s room playing video games, which helps to dispel the awkwardness. Before long, Hinata’s nerves turn into competitiveness and he’s yelling at the game and at Kageyama about how he’s going to win.

Kageyama is doing the same.

By their fourth round, they’re at a tie, and since they refuse to ever leave anything at a tie, they have to play one more round.

Kageyama wins.

“You won by like, one second!” Hinata points out, huffing.

“I still won,” Kageyama says proudly, bragging.

“I’ll beat you next weekend,” Hinata says, and it sounds like a promise.

“No you won’t,” Kageyama tells him, and they got back and forth for a while until finally the awkwardness resettles, and they remember their other plans for today.

Hinsta scratches the top of his head. “So, what are we doing?” He asks, “For our date?”

“Um,” Kageyama starts, looking down. He seems nervous. They both are. “I thought… I thought we could walk through the park and get ice cream, but if you don’t wa—”

“That sounds fun!” Hinata interrupts, and then, because he’s Hinata, he adds, “We can bring a volleyball to the park, too.” He pauses for a moment. Wait, what if it’s weird to want to play volleyball on a date? What if they’re supposed to do things that don’t involve volleyball on a date? What if—

“Yeah,” Kageyama says, and he looks relieved, which makes Hinata feel relieved. He hasn’t messed up before the date’s even started, then. That’s something, at least.

 

 

 

They’re quiet at first, walking towards the park, Hinata with a volleyball in hand. It’s kind of nice to have something to hold onto.

And then, maybe five minutes in, Kageyama clears his throat. He’s got his hands jammed into his pockets, and a crease in his forehead.

Hinata waits, knowing this means he’s about to say something, and he’s either nervous or not entirely sure what he wants to say. Or both.

“Should we like, should we talk?” Kageyama asks, looking conflicted. “I don’t really know what to do on a date, so I’m sorry if I’m not doing it right.”

Hinata’s heart does a little leap, and he finds himself biting back a smile. “I don’t know what to do either,” he admits, “so we’re lost together. I think normally on a date, we’d be getting to know each other or something, but we already know each other… so I guess we just… hang out.”

Kageyama frowns, his eyebrows furrowed together. “That sounds too easy.”

Before he can stop himself, Hinata’s laughing. “It’s not supposed to be hard, Kageyama.”

Kageyama sighs, and then he asks, “Have you ever done this before?”

“A date?”

“Yeah.”

“No.”

“Oh.”

Hinata moves the volleyball from hand to hand, not really thinking about the motion. “Did you think I have?”

“I don’t know,” Kageyama says, “I thought you might have in middle school, I guess.”

Hinata shakes his head. “Nope. You’re my first.”

Kageyama nods at that, and then they fall back into a silence, and it seems more comfortable this time, some of the awkwardness dispelled.

This is new for both of them.

A few minutes pass of Hinata switching between looking at the path in front of him and at Kageyama.

He catches his eye, and Kageyama looks away, bringing a smile to Hinata’s face. He’s cute when he’s shy .

“Hey Kageyama,” Hinata says, “catch.”

He lightly tosses the volleyball to Kageyama, who quickly catches it, slightly caught off guard.

“What do you want to major in when you go to college?” Hinata asks.

Kageyama seems thrown off by the question for a moment, but it doesn’t take long for him to recover. “Volleyball.”

Hinata grins. “Me too,” he says, even though they both know a person can’t major in volleyball.

Fortunately, they don’t have to think too hard about their futures yet. All Hinata’s sure of is that he wants volleyball to be an important part of it.

“Your turn,” Hinata tells Kageyama, who gives him a clueless look.

“Huh?”

“Toss me the ball and ask me a question.”

Kageyama pauses for a moment, and then he tosses the ball to Hinata, who catches it easily. “How long have you liked me for?”

Hinata’s face flushes. Well, that wasn’t quite the question he’d been expecting.

“Um,” He starts, swallowing. “A while?” Kageyama looks like he’s about to ask what that means exactly, so Hinata keeps going. “I don’t really know. It kind of just happened and then Yamaguchi said I had a crush on you and I realized he was right and I freaked out a little because you’re my best friend.”

“Oh,” Kageyama says, and he looks thoughtful. “When did you realize?”

“Like, a month ago,” Hinata replies, spinning the ball around in his hands.

“What made you realize?” Kageyama asks, and it seems like he’s looking for something in Hinata’s answers. “Besides Yamaguchi telling you, I mean.”

“It wasn’t a moment,” Hinata says, his cheeks still warm. It feels weird being able to talk about this stuff with Kageyama. Weird, but kind of nice. “It was a lot of moments. It was… I don’t know. It’s like, there was all these little things, like the way I felt when you would brush up against me while we were walking, or how it made me feel when you said I did good during practice. And then I just kinda realized, how you made me feel is how you feel when you like someone.”

The words leave his mouth before he has a chance to process them, and when they’re out, he can feel his body heating up with embarrassment. Oh god, maybe that was too much for a first date.

Hinata taps his fingers against the volleyball, eyes flickering between the ground and Kageyama. He needs him to say something, but all he’s doing is looking ahead, like he’s deep in thought, like he’s processing something important.

Meanwhile, Hinata’s heart is punching his chest.

“Can you please say something befo—”

“I like you.”

Hinata is stunned into silence for a moment, until he finally manages to get out, “What?”

“Everything you were saying, I… I like you too.”

Hinata is still for another moment, and then his brain catches up with what’s happening and he jumps into action, tossing the ball at Kageyama, who just barely manages to catch it, clearly surprised by the sudden motion.

“How do you know?” Hinata asks eagerly. He kind of feels like he’s vibrating.

Kageyama glances to the ground, and then his gaze returns to Hinata, where it stays. “Because everything you described, I feel too.” He pauses, “And because you push me to be a better volleyball player, and person,” he says, the last part coming out rushed, like an additional thought. “And because I want to toss to you for a really long time.”

A smile takes over Hinata’s face, and his heart feels all weird, but a good weird, the best weird, and he keeps Kageyama’s eyes as he declares, “I want to make it as far as we can together!”

He doesn’t need to clarify that he means in volleyball, but he supposes it kind of applies to their friendship in general, and to whatever is about to come.

“As far as we can,” Kageyama agrees, nodding.

It’s a promise.

 

 

 

The rest of the day goes by quickly, and while there are still moments of pause, for the most part, the awkwardness that had developed since Hinata’s confession disappears.

It isn’t until they’re walking home, after ice cream and two hours of volleyball, that the mention of dating is brought up.

“So,” Hinata starts, “Does this mean we’re dating? Like real dating?”

“I think so?” Kageyama says, and it makes Hinata smile.

“Do you want to date me?” Hinata asks this time.

“I thought I made that obvious.”

Hinata grins. He’s felt warm all day, and it has nothing to do with the weather. “I was just making sure.”

“Do you want to date me?” Kageyama asks back, and Hinata doesn’t hesitate with his answer.

“Yes.”

“So… I guess we’re dating then.”

“That’s pretty awesome,” Hinata says, nudging Kageyama’s side.

Kageyama nudges back. “Yeah.”

Notes:

Thank you for reading! I've missed writing for Haikyuu and I really hope I'll have the time and motivation to write more this summer. Feedback is always appreciated. <3