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"I'm having enough! This time it's actually enough! He's gone too far for the goddamn last time!"
Benvolio practically tears his wardrobe open and pulls random clothes out of it to throw them onto his bed. Juliet, who has witnessed him coming home in anger and desperation, is quick to follow him up the stairs of their shared apartment and into his room.
"Hey, hey, hey, Ben, what are you doing?"
She tries to calm him down but apparently there is no stopping her friend this time.
"You know, sometimes I'm convinced that I'll kill him - one day, in anger. Sometimes, I'm close to killing myself instead! This isn't healthy - it can't be! People have been telling me that it isn't! How have I even managed to cope with this for this amount of time!?"
Juliet knows the answer to that question: You love him. But since she is Juliet, she is sensitive enough and wise enough to know when to say something like that and when to avoid it.
Benvolio pulls out a medium sized suitcase from under his wardrobe and opens it only to start throwing the clothes he has thrown onto his bed before into the suitcase.
"Ben" - no reaction - "Ben!"
He looks at her, finally. "I'm leaving."
"You can't be serious."
"Never been more serious."
Juliet stares at him. "Where would you go??"
He shrugs. "Rome. Both the universities in Verona and Rome said they'd take me - I haven't said no yet. Now I will - but to Verona and not to Rome."
Juliet looks at him closely. She can see that he's serious and that scares her more than anything else. He must've been hurt badly this time.
"What about me?" - It's her last hope to stop him. Trying to win his empathy. Pathetic? Perhaps - but she knows he will regret his choice later.
It makes him stop. He sits down on his bed.
"You cannot provide the flat alone, I know that. But I can pay you out for a while and Rosaline is looking for a flatmate so she could basically move in here... You like Rosaline, right?"
Juliet sighs and sits down opposite him.
"What has he done this time?"
Something within Benvolio changes. All of a sudden he looks very sad and tired - very...hurt.
"He brought his girlfriend."
"He didn't!" For fuck's sake! That was so typical of Mercutio! She should've known - should've contacted Valentine and tell him to make sure Mercutio wouldn't be an ass this time. This time was important for Ben.
"It's nothing I couldn't have expected but - it's just - it's our day, you know? It's our thing! And I thought - my eighteenth birthday, you know, I thought - I thought maybe this time I could talk to him... tell him..."
Benvolio is close to breaking into tears. Juliet shuffles closer and gives him a comforting hug. Benvolio has been waiting so long to tell Mercutio that he is in love with him. Not that Mercutio wouldn't know - it's obvious. Everybody knows. Just as everybody knows that Mercutio feels the same but doesn't know how to deal with it - everyone except Benvolio. And Mercutio, as it seems, sometimes.
"But no, no, he brought his 'girlfriend'. Said he wanted me to meet her and when I told him that I had been hoping for some times alone - just us two - he said I'd have to accept him the way he is!"
Goddamnit, Mercutio! He must've seen it coming. Must've known there would be a confrontation of the emotional kind and freaked out. He is probably sitting at home himself right now, regretting his choice, having just broken up with that "girlfriend" he hardly knows and being too much of a fool to call Benvolio who is a mess.
"Ben, look-" Juliet is searching for words - "I know this one was really hard but I'm sure he didn't mean it!"
"Didn't mean it?" There are tears in Benvolio's eyes. "You remember last Thanksgiving when he showed up with three girls - trying to push one on me and one on Romeo although you where there and I had invited him as my number two to the party anyway?"
"Yes, yes, that was--"
"Or Christmas two years ago when I went to the Christmas school dance with Tybalt - because Mercutio had said no, because it was only a fucking school dance and because Tybalt had been nice and asked me after I was crying because Merc had said no - and what did he do?"
"He showed up drunk and had the police after him and you had to get him out of prison and home."
"Yes! He ruined the entire evening, in the end saying he'd done it to spend it with me - although I had offered him to spend it with me!"
"But hey, that still means that he cares about you, right?"
"I have tried everything, Juliet!" Benvolio is actually crying now. Juliet feels her heart break. "I asked him out every Valentine's Day and he made sure we'd end up with a bunch of girls. I've written him a fucking love letter to his birthday which he didn't read saying I shouldn't waste my poetry on him - you should've heard the sarcasm, though! Lovely! He payed another boy ten euros to kiss me at spin-the-bottle instead of him. Remember Romeo's birthday at the beach?"
"Yes, of course. It was the night Romeo and I became a couple."
"Yeah. He kissed me that night."
"He did!?"
"Yep, drunk as ever. We were alone watching the firework and he kissed me. Next day he comes to school, his hair dyed blue telling me he'd want to change his way of life and founding a goddamn rockband with all the stupid boys he could find!"
"Hey, Romeo was a part of this band!"
"Only until the others threw him out because they thought his haircut looked 'too gay'."
"Well, you've got a point there..."
"Do you understand what I'm saying, Juliet? I've had one too much. And I know it won't stop."
"You've got to give him time."
"Everyone's been saying that for years now - how much time? Let's face it. I'm a hopeless case of unrequited love. I need some distance."
He gets up and starts packing again - more coordinated and much more silent this time. Juliet watches him for a while.
"You're getting a flight?"
"Tomorrow morning, yes."
"And there is nothing I can do or say?"
"Not this time, Juliet, I'm sorry."
She sighs, gets up. "No, I am."
She ruffles his hair gently and leaves the room. She has to find her phone and call her boyfriend in Mantua. Romeo is the only one who can possibly talk his cousin out of this. And then she has to call someone else - and make sure Mercutio pays for his stupidities this time - and doesn't make another mistake.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Mercutio is on his bed, throwing a tennisball against the ceiling and catching it again whenever it falls.
Thump. Thump.
He knows the sound must be annoying his parents upstairs but he couldn't care less.
Thump. Thump. Thump.
Throwing. Catching. Never thinking. He can't start to think now. Thinking only ever leads to problems with him and his life really already is problematic enough.
Thump.
The door opens without knocking. Valentine comes in, sees him and--
"Jesus CHRIST, Mercutio - put some clothes on!"
"Hey, you're coming into my room without knocking - you have to expect finding your brother in all his naked glory!" He snickers but obeys, throws the tennisball in Valentine's direction and makes haste to find some boxers and a t-shirt.
"What do you want, Val? Mum and dad sending you to me about something again? Tell them: no. I don't care what they want - just no."
"Actually, that's not it." Valentine says calmly - in this way that lets Mercutio know precicely that there will be trouble. He sits up on his bed.
"What is it then?"
"This time, it is your stupidity leading me here - once again."
Valentine closes the door behind him but stays where he is, in the doorframe.
"The cops after me?"
"Nope." His brother gives him a loooong thoughtful look. Oh, damnnit, how he despises that look. "Benvolio is leaving."
"I beg your pardon?"
"Benvolio. Montague. Your best friend. You know, the one you're helplessly in love with?"
Mercutio shoots his brother an angry glance. "Thank you, I'm not - whatever, what about him?"
"He's leaving the city to study in Rome."
Mercutio frowns. "But the university in Verona accepted him."
"Exactly. You get it."
"Uh, sorry, Val. I'm pretty sure I do not - sooo, maybe you care to explain?"
Valentine sighs. "He doesn't have to leave - or want to very much from all I've heard - but it seems that someone has repeatedly been hurting his feelings and that he just can't stand spending more time in the presence of said person - whichfore he's rather leaving than putting up with that pain any longer."
Now Mercutio is staring at his brother. Shit. He knows exactly what that means. But it can't be true! ...can it?
"Needless to say that someone is you" Valentine adds in his sensitive way.
"Wow, thanks, Valentine, very helpful, wow - YOU'RE SERIOUS!?"
"He's taking the plane to Rome around nine."
"Shit..."
"Exactly. You've fucked up bad, Cutio. And you'd better fix it for good this time!"
Mercutio finds himself frowning again. "Sorry to bother you questioning your intentions, dear brother, but...how exactly is this your problem or any of your business?"
Valentine laughs his light-hearted laugh.
"Well, first of all, Juliet called me and told me to kick your ass about it or she'll kick both yours and mine. But also, Benvolio has been helping Uncle Escalus out with his business. And when he's gone, I will be forced to take that place again - and I'm telling you, I won't be spending three hours a day in an office with Paris, no thanks! So you have a choice -"
Mercutio doesn't like the way this is going.
"What choice?"
"Well, since you're basically living in my apartment these days, you either get up, put some clothes on, buy some flowers - I don't care what exactly you do - but you get Benvolio back!"
Mercutio swallows. "Or?"
"Or I'm kicking you out."
"You ain't serious."
"Oh, I am. You can go upstairs and see if mum and dad take you back or find a place at Uncle Escalus's - although I doubt anyone of them will like the idea. But you're not staying here!"
Mercutio gets up to properly face his brother.
"And how exactly am I supposed to make him stay!?"
"For heaven's sake, Mercutio! It's not all as hard as you've been thinking for years! Benvolio is in love with you!"
"He's not!"
"Don't even start! He is! Everybody knows he is! I know, Romeo and Juliet know, Uncle Escalus knows - I suppose even mum and dad know - and you know it, too. And you love him just the same!"
"I'm not gay."
Valentine's patience is coming to an end.
"I'm not saying you're gay. There is a range of other sexualities. Also sexual orientation doesn't have to have anything to do with love - and even if you were into Ben, you wouldn't have to be gay! You don't need to sleep with women to be straight you know!"
Mercutio is running out of things to say.
"I'm... I'm not in love with Benvolio Montague."
"What now?" His brother is giving him an empathetic look. "I suppose you've been practising this sentence in front of the mirror to convince yourself - which is so sad that I won't yell at you this time. I know you consider yourself a good liar, especially on this lie you've been telling yourself for years but you have promised not to lie to me, little brother, and believe me, I'm taking this personally. I like Benvolio. Everyone does. And you just like him that tad bit more - there is nothing wrong to it. Goddamnit, he likes you back - you two could've been happy for years! So if you can't bear it, keep lying to yourself, that's fine. But it's about time you'd stop lying to Benvolio cause you're hurting him and even he has figured out by now that he deserves someone better than you. So this is your last chance, Mercutio. Fuck it up once again and you'll be homeless and have Juliet kicking your ass until you forever regret what you've done."
There was no air left in the room - there couldn't possibly be after such a speech. Valentine has always had his way with words, Mercutio isn't the only talented one in his family when it comes to banter.
Valentine is looking at him with a brotherly serious and caring expression. "What would make you happy, Mercutio?"
He swallows again. "Benvolio being happen?"
"Is that a question?"
"...No?"
"Well then, make him happy and be happy, for god's sake!"
Mercutio's brother turns around to leave but says one last thing before closing the door to leave Mercutio alone again.
"You're a lot of things, Cutio, but you've never actually been a coward."
And then.
"You have an hour to get to the airport."
Benvolio knows it's a mistake to pick up the phone but he always picks up the phone when it's Romeo - he owes him that because Romeo always picks up when he calls, too.
"It's twenty minutes until boarding, I have my ticket, I have my suitcase and you will not talk me out of this."
His cousin's voice on the other hand is serious and firm - it hardly ever is.
"Well, then you have enough time to get your ass to the counter and get your money back and yes, I will talk you out of this. Twenty minutes? Give me ten and you'll have left the airport. Is Mercutio anywhere there?"
"Would you expect him to be?"
"Well, his best friend is leaving the city."
"I didn't tell him."
"Even better, anyway."
"How's that 'even better'?"
"Ben, you're not leaving Verona!"
"Romeo..."
"You're not! You love this city! This city is your life! You have your studies, your projects with the old Escalus, Juliet and Mercutio!"
"You want me to get hurt even more?"
"Benvolio, you know I don't! Don't say things like that!"
"But it's pain to me! Don't you get it? Mercutio is breaking my heart and I can't take anymore! I assume Juliet called you? Ask her! She's seen it!"
"You know how long it took me to admit my feelings for Juliet?"
"About three years eight months?"
"Yes, see-"
"Yeah, I see that's approximately a third of what I've been going through with Mercutio. Also, you weren't thinking that you couldn't possibly love a girl cause that's not usual."
"Okay. Fine. Let me start again."
"I'm all ears."
"Thank you. Do you know 'When Harry Met Sally'? The film, I mean."
"Of course."
"Perfect. Okay, you know how they meet each other for the first time and are so different? But actually, they have already fallen for each other!"
"Well, I'm not sure if that's -"
"And then they part. And don't see each other for what? Five years? And they meet again. And again later. And although they're into each other the entire time, they are just good friends. They have the perfect friendship both living their lives, being more or less close but they always run into each other again and hurt each other and yet need each other!"
"What exactly are you trying to say with your bad comparison of 'When Harry Met Sally' and my life?"
"Well, you're trying to run away and get distance but it won't work. It never works. Your chances are even worse than theirs because they only live in one city but Mercutio is a part of your life - of me and Juliet, of Tybalt and Paris and Escalus - of everything. You'll run into him again and again. And your lovesickness won't be cured, Ben. Love does't just stop - how stupid would that be!? - especially not when one is as demisexual as you are! It will hurt again and again and you will hate yourself for trying to run away and not giving it a chance, not giving him more time, not having tryed again and again. It will destroy you and the people around you and him - he fucking loves you, Benvolio!"
Benvolio doesn't answer. It is boarding time. He doesn't move. Tears are running down his face. Hot, wet, salty tears.
"Ben? Benvolio - are you still there? Are you alright? Say something!"
Ben nearly chokes on his tears before taking a shaky breath.
"He loves me?"
"Yes, yes, Ben, he does. Everybody knows it, just you two seem oblivious to it and I'm not the one to tell you this but I won't have Juliet and me be your respective Marie and Jess - seriously."
Ben chuckles. "It's been twenty minutes now."
"Really? Well, I've been better. Should practise more. Anyway, you're staying?"
A pause. More tears.
"Ben?"
"Yes! - ...yes."
"Thank GOD, I owe you one for listening to this bullshit, man!"
"Yeah, yeah, you do." Ben is whiping the tears off his face. He grabs his suitcase and makes his way to the counter to hopefully get his money back.
"I'll call you when I'm back home, Romeo. Thank you."
"Always man!"
When Ben leaves the airport to get a taxi home he nearly runs into Mercutio.
"Oh. Hey."
"Heeey...oh."
They stare at eacher for what feels like a minute and is but a split second.
Ben moves his suitcase into a standing position and is the first one to speak.
"You...are here."
"Yes?"
A long break of awkward silence. Well, what could they say?
"I didn't tell you" Ben eventually blurts out.
"No" Mercutio agrees. And then, after a pause and a thought. "No, you didn't."
Silence. Again. Like it's meant to be.
"Juliet told Valentine and he told me and both were threatening me and I figured I'd have to say bye and apologise and..." He stops. Benvolio is glad he does.
"Well, I'm -"
"I know. Romeo just called me."
Benvolio raised an eyebrow at that. A lot of people are pretty fast at calling others these days. Communication be blessed.
Mercutio coughes nervously.
"So, I see he's eased you into staying..."
"Yes..." Ben isn't exactly sure what to think of this. Why is Mercutio here?
"...Hm, yeah, that's - good."
Ben raises his other eyebrow and it joins the first. He is not helping Cutio out of this one - he'll have to deal with it himself. And he does.
"Cause if he hadn't, I'd have had to do it."
Conditional sentence type three. Now that thinking process seems interesting. Ben gives his friend a questioning look.
Mercutio seems to be finding a way how to say what he is apparently trying to say. He looks at Benvolio with a very concentrated but increasingly confident expression like he's finally figuring something out.
"And I'm terrible at it - I probably would've failed...Uh, ...and that would've been really bad cause - cause then, you would've left and I... I - I would never have come up with the courage to... to tell you that I love you..."
He stops at that. Like he had just stumbled across these words and would be trying to save himself from falling.
Benvolio is staring at him with big eyes and a dumbstruck expression and again they stand in a very uncomfortable silence. Mercutio shifts from one foot to the other.
"You know" - Ben is slowly getting his voice back - "saying that would've been enough to make me stay in the first place."
Mercutio laughs nervously. "Yes?"
And for the third time in two days tears are rolling down Ben's face because of one man who happens to be standing right in front of him. "Yes. Goddamnit, yes!"
Mercutio's face changes, he pulls Benvolio into a tight hug and holds him like he'd never want to let go off him again.
"No, Benny, no, c'mon, don't cry!"
"How could I not cry?" Benvolio is laughing now, tears still flooding his eyes. "I've been waiting for you to say that for years and all of a sudden you come here and my 'When Harry Met Sally' comes true! If I wasn't crying right now, I'd probably explode because of all the emotions!"
Mercutio laughs and lets go off him to look at his face and then, he is kissing his face, kissing every single tear away and Benvolio is laughing and then pulling him in to actually kiss him. Their lips meet in a soft and loving warm touch. They both taste of salt but nobody minds. The movement of Mercutio's lips against his feels like everything Benvolio could ever ask for and he feels so - safe, right, complete. Home.
They part. Mercutio is frowning.
"'When Harry Met Sally?'"
Benvolio can't help but laugh at that. "We both owe Romeo a lot."
"And Valentine."
"And Juliet."
They laugh, Mercutio takes Ben's suitcase, swings an arm around his boyfriend's shoulder and they walk, chattering, into the foggy morning.
They will get presents for their friends later. But right now, they have a lot of talking and other things to do - just the two of them, in fair Verona high. Shakespeare would be delighted.