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One Piece PETs: Cockblocking
(I do not, nor will I EVER, own One Piece. This marvel of a series belongs to Ze Great Eiichiro Oda.)
We're all familiar with cockblocking, yes?
It's the action that, whether intentional or not, serves to prevent one person from getting it on with another. This has occurred on more than one occasion with the two main couples of the Straw Hat pirates.
Take this one night, for instance.
Luffy was getting everything ready for a night of fun between Nami and himself. There were candles, rose petals scattered across the floor, Sexual Healing by Marvin Gaye was playing, and Luffy was wearing nothing but his boxers.
"Shishishi!!!" he laughed. "Perfect!! Now to wait for Nami."
Soon enough, he heard the door opened.
"Well, well, well," a familiar voice spoke, seeming surprised, "What have we here?"
Luffy turned to see Nami, who had just walked in, and his jaw dropped to the floor.
Standing at the doorway was Nami, dressed in a black sheer nightgown, wearing black high-heeled sandals, her hair done up in a bun, lips painted red, and eye lids covered in blue-violet eye shadow.
"Sweet Mama...!" Luffy whispered.
"So...shall we?" Nami asked.
Just as they were about to do just that, however...
*Knock-knock!*
"Big Brother? Big Sis Nami? Are you awake?"
"Dang it...!" Luffy whispered. "What does Aika want?"
Nami went to open the door and saw Aika, in her PJs and hugging Timber, her wolf plushie.
"Aika, why are you still awake?" Nami asked.
"I had a bad dream," Aika answered, "Can...can I sleep with you?"
"Oh, of course you can, sweetheart." Nami answered as she allowed Aika to enter her room.
Aika glanced around the interior of the room at all the lit candles, rose petals, and heard the music playing.
"Big Brother? Big Sis Nami?" she inquired. "Why are the candles lit? And why're there so many rose petals on the floor?"
"Uhh..." Luffy muttered. "Decorating?"
"Oh." Aika replied. "Big Brother?"
"Yes?" Luffy asked.
"What's Sexual Healing?" Aika inquired.
"...Aika?" Luffy asked.
"Yes?" Aika asked.
"Do you wanna sleep in here with us, or not?" Luffy inquired.
"I do," Aika nodded.
"Good," Luffy replied, "That's all I wanted to know."
"But what about the--" Aika started.
"It's a grown-up thing!" Luffy shouted. "Stop asking questions!"
"Wah~, okay!" Aika cried.
"Luffy, don't yell at her!" Nami chastised.
Aika whimpered, hiding behind the navigator.
"...I'll be in the bathroom," Luffy spoke as he walked out.
"Doing what?" Nami asked.
"What do you think?!" Luffy questioned, closing the door as he left.
"...Is Big Brother mad at me?" Aika asked, worriedly.
"No, Aika," Nami answered, assuredly, "he's not mad at you...he's just really irritable, today."
"He is?" Aika asked, climbing into bed.
"Yes," Nami answered, sitting on her bed, "It has nothing to do with you."
"Okay." Aika replied. "If you say so."
***Short timeskip brought you by the Fox Sin of Greed (A Seven Deadly Sins reference)***
After spending some time in the bathroom, Luffy came back. Aika was already asleep, snuggling close to Nami. Luffy sighed and smiled at the sight, unable to stay mad at his younger half-sister.
At that moment, he climbed into bed with Nami and Aika. As if sensing him, Aika moved over to rest her head on his chest. "Big Brother..."
Luffy smiled and kissed her forehead. "Sleep tight, Aika."
On that, he fell asleep, too.
***Short timeskip brought to you by Jiraiya peeping on women while they bathe (A Naruto reference)***
Sometimes, cockblocking can be intentional. Take this moment with Robin and Zoro, for instance.
They were making out in the Aquarium Bar. Zoro's paws roamed every inch of the top half of Robin's body. The very action itself caused Robin to moan. "Ohhh..."
Zoro smirked, and slipped his paw up Robin's shirt, then squeezed her luscious cans.
"Aah...!" Robin cried out. "Zoro~!"
Zoro proceeded to kiss down Robin's neck to her collarbone.
"Ahem!"
"Oh, god," Zoro groaned as he looked back and saw Sanji, "What do you want?!"
"Lunch is ready." Sanji answered. "So...yeah."
Zoro groaned in irritation as he got off of Robin, allowing her to sit up. "Cockblocking fox," he muttered.
"Whatever, Moss Head." Sanji retorted as he left.
"Sorry about that, Robin," Zoro apologized.
"That's all right, Zoro." Robin assured. "We'll try again another time."
"Right." Zoro replied as he stood up. "Anyway, I am kinda hungry. Let's eat."
"Of course." Robin nodded as she followed him.
***Short timeskip brought to you by Meliodas drawing on Guila's face (A Seven Deadly Sins reference)***
Luffy was messily devouring a heaping plate of spaghetti, and Sanji could only sigh. "Good god..." he muttered. "Where does he put it all?"
"I wonder that, everyday," Nami answered, "and I still haven't found an answer."
Luffy let out a belch. "Excuse me."
"You're excused," Nami told him.
Luffy smiled at Nami, who responded by petting him on the head.
"Shishishi!" Luffy laughed.
***Short timeskip brought to you by the Rasen-shuriken (A Naruto reference)***
"Haaa~!" Luffy sighed, patting his overstuffed belly. "Good eatin'."
"Thanks, Sanji," Aika piped up.
"You're welcome, Aika." Sanji replied. "Glad you enjoyed it."
With great effort, Luffy stood up from his chair. "Well, time to sleep this off," he started, "see ya when I wake up."
"Where else would ya go?" Usopp quipped.
"Eh." Luffy shrugged. On that, he left.
"What a slob," Sanji muttered.
"Yes, but he's our slob." Usopp added.
Robin only chuckled. "Very true."
Aika giggled at this, and Kumi yipped in agreement.
Sanji gathered up everyone's plates to put them all in the sink. As he washed the dishes, he whistled the tune to Higher Love by Steve Winwood.
"Come on, Kumi!" Aika called. "Let's go play!"
*Yip!* Kumi yipped as she followed the Wolf Girl.
"Have fun, you two!" Nami called after them.
"We will!" Aika replied.
With that, they went outside to go play.
***Short timeskip brought to you by Mercury Power! Make Up! (A Sailor Moon reference)***
Luffy snored as he lied on the deck. "Meat, meat, meat, meat, meat..."
Blizzard rolled his eyes as he watched him.
At that instant, Nami walked over to her sleeping captain, smiling as she knelt down beside him. Being ever so gentle, Nami stroked Luffy's hair away from his eyes.
'He is so cute when he sleeps,' she thought.
As if sensing her presence, Luffy opened up one eye at her.
"Hi." he greeted.
Nami giggled at this. "Hi."
"What's up?" Luffy asked.
"Just wanted to check up on you." Nami answered.
Luffy smiled at her. "Well I'm doing fine."
Nami smiled back at him.
"Good to hear."
She leaned over to plant a peck on his lips. As she pulled away, though, Luffy suddenly pulled her closer and kissed her.
"Mm..." he moaned. "Tasty."
"I had a tangerine, earlier..." Nami whispered.
"I can tell," Luffy smirked.
"Would you like another taste?" Nami inquired in a sultry voice.
"Yes, please," Luffy answered.
Nami complied as she gave Luffy another kiss, allowing his tongue to explore her mouth.
"Mmmmm..." Luffy moaned. "Yummy..."
Nami giggled, and soon her paws roamed down Luffy's chest.
"Ohhh, yeah," Luffy moaned.
Before they could go any further...
"Big Brother~!!"
"Oh, come ON," Luffy groaned.
"What can you do?" Nami asked. "You're an older brother, now."
"Yeah." Luffy replied.
At that point, Aika walked over to her older half-brother and older adoptive sister.
"Yes, Aika, is there something you need?" Luffy asked.
"I can't reach the cookie jar," Aika answered, "could you please get it for me?"
Luffy sighed as he stood up. "Sure."
"Thank you, Big Brother."
"Don't mention it, Little Sis."
On that, they went to the kitchen so Luffy could help Aika reach the cookie jar.
Perched on the top shelf was the aforementioned jar. Using his powers, Luffy stretched his arms and grabbed the jar. Next, he brought it over to Aika.
"Here you go." he spoke.
"Yay!" Aika cheered as she reached inside and grabbed a couple of gingersnaps.
"Shishishi!" Luffy giggled. "Is it good?"
"Mm-hmm!" Aika nodded as she munched on the cookies. "Thanks, Big Brother!"
"No problem," Luffy replied as he ruffled Aika's hair.
"Hehe!" Aika giggled.
Nami smiled as she looked at the two siblings.
Yes, the mood was gone, but to see this heartwarming moment was worth it.
Once Aika had eaten some gingersnaps, Luffy put the cookie jar back.
"I won't tell Sanji, 'kay?" Luffy asked.
"Right," Aika nodded, "thank you."
Luffy winked at her.
Aika soon left the kitchen. In that moment, Luffy noticed a smiling Nami. "What's up?" he asked.
Nami just kept smiling, which made Luffy laugh a little.
"What?" he asked.
"You're a good older brother to Aika," she answered, "No wonder she interrupts you, so much."
"I try." Luffy smiled.
Nami could only laugh. "You're too much."
"Shishishishishi!" Luffy laughed.
Bottom Line: There will always be cockblocks. Whether intentional or not.
THE END