Chapter Text
"...and only then will they trust us. Werewolves will trust us." Lydia read out loud from her bent over position over Stiles's shoulder. "That's amazing Stiles. But it's never going to appear in Composer Magazine."
"I busted my ass in grad school and this is what I get. I'm Stiles Stilinski, the How-To Guy. The How-Fucking-To Guy. All I wanted was to write meaningful pieces about politics and the world, not 'Which pick up lines really work'!" he says, looking over to his best friend.
"I know, keep busting your ass and you might get there. Probably." she says as she smirks and walks to her desk, right beside his. "And, I've got a something for you."
"What?"
"Well, you know that editor from Sports Illustrated you've been shamelessly flirting with over the phone? He sent something over here." Lydia says, handing him an envelope. He opens it and smiles widely. "What is it?" Lydia asks, looking at his smiling face.
"Oh you know, just two tickets to the MLB Finals!" he says, loud enough for all the other employees to hear. They all cheer for him. "And I'm taking you with me." he says to Lydia.
"Fine. But I'm not putting out." she says, jokingly.
"You will after two glasses of wine and nachos."
"You know me so well." The friends are then interrupted by Cora walking to their desks. "Meeting in thirty minutes." is all she says before leaving. Stiles looks over the the empty desk on the other side of him.
"Scott?" he asks Lydia. "Have you seen him?"
"Ten to one he's wallowing."
"It's my turn. I'll get him, you get the coffee." Stiles says before grabbing a white button up and a black belt from a sample rack, and leaving the building.
***
"Hey, Derek." Kate says to Derek as he rides up to the office building on his motorcycle, his classic leather jacket worn tightly around his torso.
"Hey, Argent." he says, thinking of his inner distaste for the woman. He sees her pull out a magazine as she waits for her partner. "What are you reading? Catching up on current events?" he asks once he sees it's Composure Magazine.
"Reyes and I have an appointment at Composure, the fastest-growing women’s magazine in the country.” she says. “It wouldn’t hurt you to do a little reading.” she says, giving him the magazine. Erica walks out.
“Hey, Der.” she says. “Finally decided to show up?”
“I did.” he smirks and then walks into the building, leaving the two women standing there. They roll their eyes to each other and get into Kate’s car.
***
“Hi!” Scott says when Stiles opens the door, trying to pretend that he wasn’t just crying. But he fails anyway and starts to cry.
“Good morning, buddy.” Stiles says before giving his friend a big hug. “Okay. Get dressed. We have a staff meeting in fifteen minutes. Let’s go.” he says once he lets go of his shoulders. Scott closes the door and takes a deep breath.
“I’m going back to bed. I have no reason to live.” he says, laying back in bed. Stiles sits on his bed and places the crisp, white shirt and black belt on the bed.
“Silk?” Scott says as he picks it up and runs in through his fingers.
“Put it on, it’ll make your skin look fiercely tan.” Stiles says. “Now get up. I’m not going to let you lose this job on top of everything else.” he smiles at Scott brightly. “You only dated the girl for a week.” he says after a moment.
“It was the best week of my life.”
***
“What’s up gentlemen?” Derek asks as he passes Boyd and Isaac.
“Not much.” Boyd says as he tosses Derek a button up grey shirt. Derek nods in thanks and takes off his leather jacket and army green henley. The women in the office next to his, stare at him in awe. Noticing his eight pack and tanned skin. Not noticing, he puts on the button up, trying to look a little professional.
“Well, you were right.” Isaac says.
“What aren’t I right about?” Derek asks, smirking at his friends.
“Whittemore Diamonds is looking for a new ad agency.” ignoring Derek, Isaac says, “Argent wants to move on it aggressively.”
“YES!” Derek says, showing his excitement to his two best friends. “This is a great day.” Derek starts to think of his pitch and begins saying it aloud.
“Tell him.” Boyd says, showing no emotion like always.
“What?”
“Argent gave it to Kate and Erica.” Isaac says, already seeing the frown appear on the werewolf’s face.
“No way!”
“Well, you know Kate’s his daughter and Erica’s hot.” Isaac says, noticing Boyd glaring at him. “Sorry.” he says, knowing Boyd doesn’t like people hitting on his girlfriend.
“And we’re the leather jackets and motorcycles division.” Boyd says in addition. “Argent’s meeting with them at O’Brien’s tonight.”
“This isn’t happening. I won’t let it. This is going to be my account, my pitch. They will not take this from me.” Derek says, determination in his voice. “I’ll just meet them at O’Brien’s.”
***
Stiles and Scott meet Lydia in front of their building. “Hi.” Scott says, trying to play off his sadness.
“Hi.” Lydia says in return as they walk into the building. The group of friends slowly walk to the elevator.
“Why does this always happen to me?” Scott says, “Like, everything is going great the first week and a half, but then they get scared and just leave. Allison and I had such a connection. You know, the first time we had sex, I cried.”
“What?” both Lydia and Stiles say.
“You mean like one tear running down your cheek, right?” Lydia asks.
“No, I even told her I loved her.”
“After how many dates?” Lydia asked.
“Five.” Stiles gave him a look. “Okay, two. It was how I felt, and I wanted to express myself.”
“What’d she say?” Stiles asked.
“She didn’t have to say anything, I knew she felt the same.” Scott said as Stiles and Lydia shared a look. “But then she got really busy and wouldn’t respond to any of my calls. I even left her some messages.”
“How many messages?”
“A lot.” Scott says as the three people walk into the already crowded elevator. “And I already know why she broke up with me. My jaw’s crooked!” everyone in the elevator looks at him.
“Your jaw is not crooked!” Lydia and Stiles say in sync. The rest of the elevator ride is traveled in complete silence. But as the three leave the elevator their conversation continues.
“Oh, Scott, if the most handsome man in the world acted the way you did, then they’d still run the other way.” Stiles says, walking toward their cubicles.
“No, no guy or girl would ever run away from you. Even if you ran away from the girl.” Scott said as they all walk into their ‘board’ room. It was basically a room with a bunch of couches.
“First, that is untrue. And if I did the things you did, then I’d get dumped too.” Stiles says as they walk past their boss, Marin Morell.
“Okay, family, shoes off.” she says, like every meeting she calls. Everyone takes off their shoes and sits on the various furniture that surrounds them. “Alright, let’s get started. Cora, what do you have?” she asks the scary, yet beautiful woman.
“Well, I’ve just finished the “Werewolves for Beginners” piece. It’s a little scary, but upbeat. Now I’m on the “What Your Emissary Won’t Tell You” which is also a little scary, but still upbeat.” Cora says, Lydia and Stiles mouthing the words, “a little scary, but still upbeat” as Cora says it the second time.
“Okay, great.” Marin says, then turns to Stiles. “How’s How-To with Stiles?” Stiles takes a deep breath and makes a quick decision.
“I’ve been working on something that’s kind of different…” Marin waves him on, “it’s a political piece..” Stiles is then interrupted from his boss.
“No. You work at Composer Magazine, not the New York Times. We are fashion, fitness, trends, diets, and gossip.” Marin says.
“I know, but..” Stiles is again interrupted by Marin.
“Stiles, this column is new for you. If it becomes a must-read, then you write about whatever you want. But now, you write what I want. Okay?” Stiles nods, not trusting his voice. Marin turns suddenly to Scott, who isn’t paying attention.
“Scott, what do you have?” she asks Scott. Lydia, who was sitting next to Scott, nudged his side.
“I’m sorry, Marin, I’m not feeling well.” he lies.
“He got dumped.” Lydia cuts in honestly.
“Oh, no, Scott.” Marin says, making everyone else frown at Scott in sympathy. “Well, you look great.”
“I haven’t eaten since the split.” Scott says, holding his stomach and his fragile heart.
“Good for you. Write about it.” she says heartlessly. Scott looks at her in shock.
“I can’t use my personal life for a story!” Marin nods in ‘understanding’.
“Okay. Who will use Scott’s personal life for a story?” Marin asks. Several people, including Cora, raise their hands. “Okay, Cora, you got it.” Stiles looks at them in shock, and makes another split decision.
“I’ll do it.” Stiles raises his hand slightly. Lydia and Scott look at him in anger and confusion.
“What?!” Scott says, looking at his ‘former’ best friend.
“I’ll sort of do it. You’ll be my muse.” he then looks to Marin. “Look at Scott. He is a handsome, intelligent, and caring young man. But he makes mistakes in relationships, like most of our readers. So, I could start by dating a guy, because most of our readers are women, and could drive him away by doing common mistakes that everyone does in relationships. It would be a sort of ‘How-To’ in reverse.” Stiles finishes.
“What not to do.” Marin says with a small smile on her face. “How To Lose a Guy in 10 Days. No. How To Lose a Werewolf in 10 Days. That’s more modern and interesting.” Marin starts to continue the meeting before Stiles catches up.
“Wait. Why ten days?”
“Because five is too short and we go to press in ten.” and that’s the end of that.
After the meeting, all the employees left the ‘board room’. And saw two women standing near their receptionist desk. Both were beautiful. Both with blonde wavy hair and blue eyes.
“Hello.” Marin says to them, bringing Stiles, Scott, and Lydia toward them. “Lydia, gentlemen. This is Erica Reyes and Kate Argent from Argent Advertising. We’re going to make some great tie-ins with them this fall.” Marin then points to her three prized employees separately. “This is Lydia Martin, fashion and trends, Scott McCall, Fitness and Health, and this is Stiles Stilinski, our resident How-To guy.”
“Hi, it’s nice to meet you Stiles. I’ve read your column quite a few times.” Erica says to Stiles, giving him a predatory grin. Stiles gives her an uncomfortable, awkward smile back, giving Scott a ‘help me’ look.
“What are you working on now?” Kate asks.
“I’m..” Stiles starts to say, but once again, Marin interrupts him.
“How To Lose a Werewolf in 10 Days. He’s actually going to date a guy and drive him away.”
“Seems evil. I love it.” Kate says, giving Stiles a wink. Stiles turns around, looking behind him, not sure that she winked at him.
“It’s going to be great.” Marin says. “But, he has to go find the guy. So, go, go ,go.”
“Nice to meet you.” he says as Scott, Lydia, and himself grab their bags to leave.
“Bye.” Erica says flirtatiously.
“Find the guy. Find the guy.” is all Stiles can say as they leave the building.
***
“Lydia, come on! I need help!” Stiles says into the phone as he paces in front of his closet. “I have no idea how to pick up a guy outside a gay club!”
“That’s not true! You dated Danny and that guy Matt.” Lydia’s voice travels through the phone.
“I met Danny in high school. And Matt was a total creep.” Stiles says in response, sniffing a random shirt he found.
“You’ll do fine. And I’m dressed already and Scott’s on his way to your apartment. So, we’ll both help you. Just make sure you take a shower.”
“Okay.”
“I’ll be right there. Love you.”
“Love you too, Lyds.” Lydia arrives within 20 minutes. Carrying a large plastic bag. “What’s that?” Stiles says when he opens the door, seeing the bag immediately. He hated it when Lydia bought him stuff. It made him feel guilty.
“It’s nothing. Just some clothes Aiden left at my house.” she says as she neatly takes out all the folded items. Stiles picks one up and scoffs.
“With the tags still on?” he says as he looks through all the clothes.
“Don’t fight me. Just put this on. Wait, did you take a shower yet?” Lydia asks.
“No.” Stiles sighs, already walking toward his bathroom. He’s halfway through conditioning his hair when Lydia walks in. “Lydia! What the hell are you doing?”
“Please, honey. It’s nothing I haven’t seen before.” she says as she reapplies her red lipstick and teases her hair a little. “And, hey. Maybe I’ll catch a live one tonight.” she says before leaving the bathroom. Stiles steps out the shower and wraps himself in a towel.
“You could catch a live one in a zombie apocalypse.” he says, catching the multiple shirts Lydia tosses at him. The outfit consists of a white button up with a navy tie under a light grey sweater with a navy suit jacket over all of it. With a matching pair of navy dress pants. And to make it more Stiles-like, a pair of grey keds. And of course, Lydia masterfully did his hair, spiking it up perfectly. And as she finishes, the doorbell rings. Stiles gets up and opens the door, not looking at his appearance yet.
“Woah.” Scott says when his best friend opens the door.
“What?” Stiles asks once he lets Scott in, wearing a regular black suit with a white button up and a blue tie.
“I mean, I always knew my best friend was a hottie with a body. But, damn. You look great man.” Scott says, giving Stiles a bro-hug-thing.
“Oh, well, it’s all thanks to Lyds.” Stiles says, looking in the mirror. “Woah.” he stares at his reflection.
“Okay, we should get going.” Lydia says in her deep plum, tight dress. And the three left the cramped apartment. And get into a cab.
“O’Brien’s, please.” Lydia says to the driver. She nods and starts to drive. Once Lydia, (“I can pay for it Lydia.” “Shut up, Stilinski, I want to.”) pays for the ride they exit the cab.
“You are never gonna pull this off.” Scott says as they walk across the busy street.
“Watch me. Tonight, I’ll get the guy and tomorrow I’ll pull the switch. Before the ten days are up, I’ll have this guy running for his life. But, Scott, I’ll need your nose, okay. Since Marin insisted, I need a werewolf.”
“You’re not gonna torture him are you?” Scott asks.
“No, just going to do everything people do wrong in relationships. I’ll be clingy, needy, and touchy-feely.”
“Ohh, call him in the middle of the night.” Lydia says, “and tell him what you’ve had to eat.”
“What’s wrong with that?” Lydia and Stiles look at Scott in pity and confusion. “Just kidding.” he says as they enter the restaurant/bar.
***
“Hello, Mr. Argent, Reyes, Kate.” Derek says as he walks to his boss’s table in O’Brien’s.
“Derek, what are you doing here?” Kate asks, anger in her voice.
“I’m here for the meeting.”
“You know what’s funny about that?” Erica asks, “You weren’t invited.”
“Yeah, but I should have been.” Derek says as he sits down across from his boss. “And it was my tip that Whittemore’s looking for a new firm.”
“Yes, but Reyes and Kate are what is best-suited for the company.” Gerard says.
“Well, that’s me, sir. I want this pitch.” Derek said, toying with his cuff links.
“Derek, you sell Harley’s better than anyone, but this is diamonds. And these girls sell luxury better than anyone.” Gerard says, “And this would be our biggest account.”
“I know, and I’m the man to do it.”
***
“Why this place?” Stiles asks as the three find a place to stand in the crowded bar.
“It’s perfect.” is all Lydia says.
***
“Why keep diamonds for women? Why isn’t it normal for men to get diamonds? That should be apart of the pitch.” Derek says, starting his pitch. “Alright, they say, a diamond is forever. We say, a diamond is for everyone.” Derek finishes. Gerard smiles.
“I like that.”
“We don’t.” Kate interjects. “‘A diamond is for everyone?’ That sends the message that diamonds are everywhere, which means they’re not rare. And if they’re not rare, they lose their status. Status is the reason to buy them, and Derek would get that if he understood women, or even men, at all, which he doesn’t.” Kate continues, looking at Derek.
“You can’t feel bad about that, Derek, nobody does.” Gerard says, sighing.
***
Scott walks up to the bar, getting two beers and one glass of white wine.
“Here you go.” the bartender says as he hands Scott the drinks.
“Thanks.” Scott says as he grabs the drinks. As he brings his arm back he knocks his elbow into a girl sitting at the bar, slightly. “Sorry.” he says, looking in her eyes. She looks away right away, while Scott still looks, hoping for a love connection. When she still doesn’t look, he leaves to find his friends, a little disappointed. “Here. Here.” he says when he gives them the drinks, Lydia the wine and Stiles the beer.
“Thanks.” Stiles says and looks around.
“Dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum, dum…” Lydia starts to say/sing.
“Don’t pressure him. He’s pursuing.” Scott says, knowing his friend has anxiety problems.
***
“Selling a diamond to a person is like making them fall in love.” Erica starts, slowly touching her necklace, making Gerard’s eyes follow. “They has to feel giddy, desired, and desperate.”
“Take a look around the room, boss, most of the people in this bar are looking for that.” Kate says.
“Exactly, the skills required to market diamonds are the same as those to make a person fall in love.” Derek interrupts.
“I’m not talking about lust. A person in lust wants chocolate, and person in love wants diamonds.” Kate says.
“Well, I’m not talking about lust, either. I’m talking about deep, meaningful, head-over-heals, matching towels, let’s grow old together, L-O-V-E.” Derek spelled out. “Look, I love men and women.. No matter what age. I respect men and women, I also listen to them. That’s why I can sell myself to any woman or man, any place, any time.” Derek finishes, for he’s bisexual, not gay or straight.
“Make someone fall in love with diamonds, or you?” Erica asks, seeing Stiles Stilinski and getting an idea.
“Either one.”
“That’s cocky, Derek.” Gerard says.
“Not, cocky, confident.”
“I want to see you prove that.” Erica says. “The agency's co-hosting a party for the Whittemore’s at the Beacon Museum. The party's a week from Sunday. Do you think you could make someone fall in love with you by then?” Kate asks.
“Ten day?” Derek asks.
“Any person, anywhere, anytime?” Erica asks.
“Any single, available, person. Male or female.” Derek answers.
“We’re not tricking you here, Der. In fact, we’ll pick the woman, right here right now. On second thought, we’ll pick a man, since you say diamonds are for everyone.” Erica says.
“So, who’s the lucky guy?” Derek asks, looking around.
“Let’s see. Ooh, there’s that blonde babe in the leopard sweater vest.” Kate says, pointing to the ‘bear’ in the corner.
“Be nice, ladies.” Derek says.
“No, not him. Him.” Erica says, pointing towards a lanky man dressed in a navy suit.
“Who?” Kate asks.
“Him, in the navy suit and the grey sweater. Brown hair, pretty smile.” she says, surprising Kate, who recognizes her from earlier. Erica puts a finger to her mouth, silently telling her to keep quiet.
“Done.” Derek smiles.
“What?” Erica asks.
“I said ‘done’. As long as he’s interested in men.” Derek says.
“I’m sure he is.” Erica says.
***
“See the guy next to the horrible guy in the green shirt that I would never even consider?” Stiles asks, pointing toward the bar.
“Very cute.” Lydia says.
“Right?” Stiles says. Lydia and Scott nod at him, pushing him toward the man. “Wait, is he…” he says to Scott. Scott takes a deep breath in his direction. He nods, telling Stiles that he’s a werewolf. Stiles goes to the man.
***
“After I win this bet, I get the Whittemore pitch.” Derek says.
“Yes. If you come to the party with that man who is truly in love with you, you get the pitch.” Gerard says, shaking on it. Derek leaves the table, determined.
***
“So, where are you from?” Stiles asks the man next to him.
“Well, I was originally from Philadelphia, but I moved here to be with my wife.” he says, dropping the bomb. He then sees a woman walk up to them, and grasping the man’s arm. “Oh, honey, this is Stiles.” the man says to the woman. Stiles then realizes that they’re married.
“Hi, well, you guys enjoy New York.” Stiles says, and starts to walk toward his friends. From far away they look at him confused. He raises his left hand points to his ring finger. “He’s married.” he mouths to them. They frown. As he’s about to reach them a strong hand reaches out and grabs his arm. Turning around, he sees him, the most handsomest man he’s ever seen. He was wearing a tight black suit, with a white button up beneath it.
“Hi.” the mystery man says, his smile sparkling.
“Hi.” Stiles says, matching the man’s smile. The two men stare at each other for a second. “I’m Stiles Stilinski.”
“Derek Hale.”
“Cute.” Stiles says.
“Thank you.” Derek smiles. Stiles looks at Scott quickly, already seeing them staring. Scott nods.
“I meant your name.”
“Thank you two times.” Derek says, “Unattached?”
“Currently.”
“Likewise.” is all Derek says. “Interested?”
“Perhaps.”
“Hungry?” Derek asks.
“Always.”
“Leaving?” Derek asks.
“Now?” Stiles asks, “Okay, I’ll meet you at the door.” Stiles says and walks away to his friends. And Derek is a shameless werewolf, so he stares as Stiles leaves.
“Nice.” he says quietly and walks toward the door.
“Hey, guys. I think I got one.” Stiles says. “I’ll flip the switch tomorrow. I’m doing this for you.” he says to Scott.
“See you tomorrow.” Scott says at the same time Lydia says, “Be sexy.”
Stiles meets Derek outside and starts to walk toward a nice car.
“No, it’s over here.” Derek says and leads Stiles to a motorcycle. “Here, you can wear the goofy-looking helmet.” he hands Stiles a helmet.
“It won’t look goofy on me.” Stiles says, putting it on.
“Look at you. That’s pretty damn cute.” Derek says, smiling brightly for what feels like the tenth time that night. “Are you ready to go for a ride, Stiles?” he asks, helping Stiles on the motorcycle.
“Are you ready to go for a ride, Der?” Stiles asks, flirting with the man. Derek chuckles and turns a little red. Derek starts up the bike, taking them to a local restaurant.
“So...what do you think?” Derek asked, watching Stiles devour his cheeseburger and curly fries.
“About you or the food?” Stiles asked, smirking.
“Both.” Derek says after a moment.
“This is delicious...and I’m still deciding.” Stiles says, taking an unattractive bite of his burger.
“Anything I can do to help?”
“Yeah, actually. You can answer some questions for me.” Stiles says, wiping his mouth with his napkin.
“How many is some?”
“Five.”
“I’ll give you three.” Derek says.
“Okay. What do you do for a living?” Stiles asks, putting his left elbow on the table.
“I’m in advertising. Mostly motorcycles and leather, but I’m trying to break into the jewelry business.” Derek says.
“Saving the world, one motorcycle gang at a time?” Stiles asked, raising his eyebrow.
“Something like that.” Derek said, the right side of his mouth rose slightly. “What about you? Have I seen your work?”
“I work at Composure Magazine.”
“Ahh, the fastest growing women’s magazine in the country.” Derek recites from Kate’s earlier words.
“I’m impressed.” Stiles says.
“Saving the world one shopaholic at a time, right?” Derek asks.
“Hey, look here, pup, I have a master’s degree in journalism from Berkeley. My boss loves me, and if I write what she wants, then I can take control and write whatever I want.” Stiles says, picking up some fries.
“Like shoes?” Derek asks, ducking the fry Stiles throws at him.
“No, like motorcycles and leather.” Stiles says, moving when Derek throws the same fry at him.
“So you think you got me all figured out?” Derek asks, moving slightly closer to Stiles’s face.
“Almost. I still have one last question.” Stiles says, looking deeply into Derek’s bright green eyes. “True or false: All’s fair in love and war?”
“True.” Derek says, knowing Stiles was chosen for him by Reyes and Argent.
“Great answer.” Stiles says, giving Derek a smirk. Derek smirks back at him and pays the check.
“Good question.”