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Three years since Anwynn had come to live with them. And Fili did not seem to be able to remember a time when she was not with them. She had truly become a member of the family.
Even if it was an admittedly odd family: four Dwarven royals and one random human girl. But it seemed to work for them, so they went with it.
Anwynn helped Dis out with some of the housework, and then joined Dis’s sons and brother outside to do chores or train or work in the forges. Dis loved the girl like the daughter she never had, and even Thorin was impressed with Anwynn. He had never seen a female so willing to push herself beyond what others thought a woman capable of.
Kili may as well have grown up with the girl. As far as he was concerned, he’d always had a sister and nothing anyone could tell him would have him think otherwise. He adored Anwynn as much as he did Fili, and possibly just a tiny bit more. After all, his brother never patted his head or called him his puppy, but Anwynn did. And she made him his favorite cakes when she had the time. He had also never had anyone whom he could teach anything, so it was nice to have someone learn from him (although he was still the best archer around, hands down).
Fili adored Anwynn as well, but on a different level. He was, in fact, completely and hopelessly in love with her. The way her brown hair whipped around in the wind, how her iron grey eyes looked at him warmly, the way she held her sword, how she hit her hammer to shape the metal in the forge...Everything about her entranced Fili. And he was convinced it was high time that he did something about it.
He wanted to ask Anwynn to marry him.
He realized he was a little young to be thinking about marriage. He was only eighty years old; Dwarves did not come of age until seventy-five, so he was just barely an adult. Most other dwarves waited at least another ten years before they considered marriage, if they ever intended to marry at all. However, Fili was certain that Anwynn was right for him, and that was all he needed.
Well, that and his Uncle Thorin’s approval. As Thorin’s heir-apparent, it was probably a good idea to run all this by him first, just to make sure everything checked out and that Fili would still be allowed to consider himself a relative of Thorin’s. So one nice morning when there was nothing really to do, Fili asked Kili to take Anwynn out for archery practice while he talked to their uncle.
“Uncle?” Fili asked hesitantly; he had no idea how this was going to go over. Thorin was fond of the girl, yes, but this was a big idea for someone to wrap their head around.
“Hm?” Thorin murmured from his seat at the table, looking over a list of items to be forged in the coming week.
“I need to talk to you,” said Fili, taking a chair at the table next to his uncle. “It’s about something important. Very important.”
Thorin stared at him, waiting for him to continue. Fili cleared his throat nervously, then took a deep breath.
“I have been thinking about this for a long time now, and I believe it is the right thing. I want to ask Anwynn to marry me.”
Thorin continued to stare at him as though he had not spoken. The silence between them stretched on until Fili wanted to upturn the kitchen table just to get a reaction from his uncle. But he held himself as still as possible, looking right back into Thorin’s blue eyes.
Finally, Thorin spoke.
“No.”
Fili felt his world lurch. No? He could feel his anger rising. How dare Thorin!
“No?”
“Yes. No.” Thorin went back to the list in front of him. Fili could feel himself shaking with rage. His uncle had no right! He reached out and slammed his hand down on the paper, crumpling it beneath his fingers.
“And why no?” he asked, bright blue eyes blazing.
Thorin’s shoulders sagged. “Because lad, she’s a daughter of Men, not a Dwarf.”
“And what the hell does that have to do with anything?” Fili spat out. Really, he had imagined this going much better.
Thorin gave a sigh of reluctance. “Please, do not misunderstand me, Fili. I am just as fond of the girl as you are. Very proud of her indeed, and I consider her a part of my house. But you are a prince and the heir to the throne of Erebor. Your own heirs should be Dwarves as well, and Anwynn is no Dwarf.”
That was his reasoning? Fili stared at him incredulously. He was worried about Fili’s children? And who would take over the throne?
“I am the heir of naught, and my children will be the same!” Fili shouted. “In case you haven’t noticed, dear Uncle, I have no throne for anyone to take over! There is a great bloody dragon sat his greedy arse on my throne, and for all I care, he can have it!” Fili had never, ever spoken to his uncle like this before. He was always the dignified, respectable one, who thought before he opened his mouth. But now he did not bother to hold his words back, not with something as important as this. “All I want is Anwynn.”
Thorin looked furious. He always took great offence when someone spoke lightly about Smaug’s theft of his kingdom. His eyes were burning and he leveled a glare at Fili that would have any lesser Dwarf crying. When he spoke, his voice was quiet but dangerous, trembling with barely restrained rage.
“I do not mean to infringe upon your happiness. If it were within my power, I would see you and your brother the happiest beings in all Middle Earth. However, I also have the future of my people to think about. Our people. And our people will need a leader who is one of them, not some mixed child. If you wish to marry then pick a Dwarvish lass, for the good of our kingdom.”
That was it.
“Kingdom be damned!” Fili yelled, standing and slamming his hands on the table. “I’ll gladly give up my position as heir-apparent, give it to Kili. Turn me out of the family, and I’ll be more than happy to take my banishment from the settlement. I can make a life on my own, so long as I have Anwynn. I’ll be more than willing to carve out an existence for just the two of us, if that is how you will have it. But I refuse to put what is best for this mountain that I have never seen before what I know my heart wants!”
Thorin was now on his feet, too. The atmosphere around them was tense; the air seemed to crackle with anger between them. They stared silently at one another, seething, until the kitchen door creaked open.
With all of the commotion that they had been making, neither one had heard the knock at the front door. Dis, who had known what was being discussed in the kitchen and had made herself scarce, had opened the front door and let in Balin. They had heard all of the yelling and shouting and had come to see what was the matter.
“Thorin—” started Balin, but Dis beat him to it.
“What the hell is going on in here?” She looked from her son to her brother, eyes narrowed and voice dangerous. It was enough to quell the fighting Dwarves. Or at least break the tension, at any rate.
“He wishes to marry a daughter of Men,” said Thorin, daring to speak first. His sister remembered her home just as well as he did, surely she would also remember the needs of her people.
“So?”
Thorin stared at her, dumbstruck. “Fili is my heir; his children will be his heirs. They will need to be Dwarves.”
“And so they will be,” said Dis, her hands on her hips, a very not-happy look on her face. “Fili is a Dwarf; his children will be Dwarves as well. Whether they are solely Dwarves or not is no matter. I would much rather have a part-Dwarf king with Anwynn’s warm heart than a full Dwarf king with some wretched Dwarven girl’s spirit.”
Thorin gaped. His family was losing it. He turned to Balin, his oldest friend and counselor. Surely he would stand with him.
“Thorin,” said Balin in his merry voice, fixing his king with a firm stare, “why are you so against this? We all know Anwynn; she is as lovely a lass as any I have ever met. I have seen the way she looks at Fili. She loves him, and he loves her. It would break both of them to be separated, especially for some political reason concerning a mountain that neither of them have ever laid eyes on and have very little chance of ever doing so. And besides, if I heard Master Fili right, he plans on taking our girl and running away on their own if you refuse. So, which would you rather have; a happy couple capable of leading your people, or for your heir to disappear all because you are stuck on useless propriety?”
The three others gazed at Fili, who was still staring, his eyes shining with determination. His hands were still on the table, his shoulders set, his breath heaving but steady. He was not backing down.
“You have made a good life for us here, Thorin,” said Balin, turning back to his friend. “Would you really deny this young Dwarf his one true desire?”
Dis folded her arms and her harsh glare softened. “Thorin, the whole point of finding a place to settle was for our children to have a safe, happy life. Would you really deny your nephew his happiness for a fancy chair that’s probably buried under a ton of dragon dung?”
Thorin held strong for another moment, and then felt his shoulder sag. He closed his eyes and hung his head, sighing.
“You are right, both of you,” he relented. “Fili, I cannot ask you to give up your love for the sake of something that might never happen.” He looked into his nephew’s hard eyes. “I apologize. You have my permission. And my blessing.”
It was a long moment before anyone moved. Fili continued to stare at his uncle. Thorin blinked back. What else was he supposed to say?
Then Fili relaxed and found a smile. He stepped towards his uncle and extended his hand. Thorin took it and leaned in until their foreheads tapped in an affectionate gesture. They released after a few seconds, and then Fili turned to his mother, who immediately swooped upon him, hugging and crying.
“My little dwarfling is getting married!” she cried happily.
And that was when it hit Fili; he had Thorin’s permission. He was getting married. Granted, he still had to ask Anwynn and have her agreement, but if she said yes, then he was getting married! The room seemed to swim in front of him and he suddenly felt a bit dizzy. He shook his head a bit, trying to clear up, and set his eyes on Balin.
The little white-haired dwarf was beaming at him, giving him a knowing look. He winked at Fili and said, “I suppose I have a vested interest in all this.” He opened his arms to the affair going on around him. “I’m quite fond of the little lass myself; I would hate it if she suddenly disappeared never to return.”
Fili smiled at him and nodded. “Well, now I suppose I have a proposal to plan.” He grinned stupidly at the thought.
“Oh, that’s where we come in,” said Balin. “Let us help you, lad.”
Fili thought about how his first confession of love to Anwynn had gone, and quickly accepted the offer. The way his luck went, a boulder would probably drop from the sky onto him if he tried to do it alone.
It was almost a week later when all the preparations had been made and it was time to act.
They had all gone hunting the day before and had taken down two large boars. Dis had asked Anwynn to stay and help her prepare the meat for dinner while the men had gone to the forge, so she did. The two women worked all day, cutting and cooking the meat, then preparing side dishes. It was far more food than Anwynn had ever seen her Dwarf family eat, and she wondered what Dis was planning on doing with all of it. She was still perplexed when Dis then told her to take the rest of the day for herself.
“What?” Anwynn asked stupidly.
“Take the rest of the afternoon and go into the market, dear,” said Dis patiently, smiling. She produced her small coin pouch and handed the girl two silver pennies. “You’ve done quite a bit of hard work lately, and you’ve earned yourself something nice. Maybe some ribbons or a new knife sheath?”
Anwynn accepted the coins silently, and then when Dis patted her on the shoulder and nodded towards the door, she smiled and tucked the coins into her own small purse.
She made it to the market (while the Dwarves of Erebor did not live with the native Dwarves of the mountain, they did share the same common areas within the mountain itself) and walked around for a while. She ran into a few people she knew and stopped to talk for a bit before moving on.
Meanwhile, the Dwarves were still working away in the forge. Friends and customers had dropped by on and off and, upon hearing what Fili was preparing to do, they offered bits and pieces of advice.
“Cook for her when you can,” said Bombur, coming by to pick up his recently repaired ladle (it was his favorite ladle, after all). “Ladies appreciate it when you cater to them, as much as they cater to us.” Fili nodded at this, suddenly wishing he could prepare something more than accidentally-scrambled eggs.
“Oh, remember to tell her you appreciate all that she does for you,” said Gloin, coming by to drop off an axe for repair. “And it never hurts to tell her how beautiful she is to you.” Fili nodded.
Gimli, who had come in with his father, just glared at Fili. He’d had a crush on Anwynn since he had first met her, and hearing about someone else planning to wed her had him brooding. Fili glared right back; as much as he liked his younger cousin, the teen’s puppy-crush on Anwynn had bugged him for years.
It was almost time to close the forge and go home when Kili finally confronted Fili. Thorin was busy taking inventory for the day, leaving the boys alone to put away their tools. Kili blocked his brother from the work bench he was heading for to settle him with his fiercest stare.
“What?” asked Fili, bewildered.
“If you hurt her, I will hurt you,” said Kili simply, still glaring at his brother.
“I’m sorry?” said Fili, raising an eyebrow.
“If you hurt Anwynn, I will end you.”
“Kili, you’re my brother! You’re supposed to be on my side!”
Kili shook his head, eyes still narrowed. “Anwynn is nice and kind and makes me cookies and if you hurt her, you will die. Clear?”
Fili, somewhat shocked by his brother’s antics, simply nodded. Kili nodded once, and then his face split into a grin. He laughed and knocked his brother in the back of the head.
“You’ll be fine tonight,” he said, clapping Fili on the shoulder. “Just don’t knock anything over on either of you!” Fili grumbled at his brother and ducked past him to put away his hammer.
After a few hours and a few purchases, she made her way back home. She had bought a new small knife (normally her Dwarves made all her weapons, but she was jealous of the boot axes that Fili had recently received and her pride stopped her from asking for something similar from Thorin) and some pretty green fabric that she would ask Dis to make into a new hood for her.
On her way home, Anwynn realized just how low the sun was in the sky and figured that the men would be home soon, if they were not already. Once she opened the door to their cottage, she saw that they were indeed home. And all lined up in the living room, looking ready to go somewhere.
“Oh, Anwynn, welcome back, dear!” Dis greeted, taking her arm and pulling her inside. “Did you have a lovely time at the market?” Without giving her time to respond, Dis went on.
“We had so much extra food that we decided to take some over and have dinner with Balin and Dwalin. Only Fili says he’s too tired and would rather stay home. Would you mind very much staying here and keeping him company?” Anwynn opened her mouth to reply, but Dis continued again.
“Oh, thank you very much, my dear! We’ll be back later; it will probably be a while, so don’t bother to stay up. Have a good night!”
And with that, Dis patted her hand and was out the door, basket of food in hand. Kili kissed Anwynn’s cheek quickly before following his mother out, and Thorin patted her quickly on the head before bringing up the rear. The door shut before Anwynn could process what exactly had just happened, and she turned to Fili, completely bewildered.
“What the hell just happened?” she asked faintly. Fili laughed. “What?” Anwynn asked, confused.
“The look on your face,” Fili said between chuckles, “is priceless.” He eventually got himself together and continued with a mostly straight face. “They, uh, they decided to take most of the food and have dinner with friends. But it’s been a long day at the forge and honestly, all I want to do is have dinner and relax at home. I hope you don’t mind staying with me; look, I’ve even cleaned up just for you!”
Anwynn laughed; indeed, Fili had bathed and changed clothes. “Oh, alright. I suppose I don’t mind, since you did bathe. Please, tell me they left at least a little food here?”
“Aye, Mum left us enough for a good dinner. And even some dessert.” Fili led the way into the kitchen where the table was already laid.
Anwynn’s mouth watered. Some of the wild boar was out on a plate, along with peas, carrots, roasted squash, cheese, and bread. However, it was more difficult than usual to see the table, as the simple chandelier in the middle of the kitchen had not been lit. Instead, there were small candles arranged on the table, giving a soft glow to the room. Anwynn brushed it off; maybe Fili had just been too tired to light the chandelier and his family saw no point since they were going out? Besides, it did give off a relaxing atmosphere. They both found their way to seats across from each other and loaded their plates.
They ate silently for a while, Anwynn enjoying the food and Fili an absolute nervous wreck. He kept thinking, after this next bite, I’ll ask her. Okay, after this bite, I’ll do it…I need something to drink first…Maybe once we’ve finished eating…
Finally, Fili had worked up the nerve. He had finished everything on his plate but the bread. He opened his mouth. He was finally going to do it! Here it went—
“So, what did you get at the market today?”
Damn it.
Anwynn looked up from her food and smiled. She reached into her sleeve and pulled out her new knife. She handed it to Fili with a bashful grin.
“I, uh, wanted one I could hide on me. The strap is adjustable, so I can wear it on my arm or my ankle.”
“Oh, kind of like my axes,” Fili said, examining the knife.
“Um, yeah, something like that.” Anwynn tried to fight her blush.
“It’s good,” declared Fili, slipping the knife back in its sheath. “But if you wanted a new weapon, why not just ask me to make you one?”
Anwynn accepted her knife back and mumbled something about not wanting to bother him, but Fili understood. He smirked. His girl was dreadfully prideful. He had noticed her eyeing his new boot axes from the moment Balin and Dwalin had given them to him for his birthday. Her pride stopped her from asking someone for her own set, so she went out and got something similar on her own.
“I also bought some new cloth,” Anwynn said hurriedly, trying to move to a new subject before Fili could call her out more. “I want to ask your mother to make me a new hood; mine’s so worn water leaks right in the moment is starts raining. Do you think she’ll agree?”
Fili smiled again. Besides her pride, Anwynn was very humble. She hated asking anything of anyone for fear of putting them out. “I’m sure she’d love to,” he said. “After all you do around here, I’m sure she’d be happy to. Let me guess; you picked a green, didn’t you?”
“Aye,” said Anwynn, nodding her head proudly. “A nice forest-y green. A lovely color indeed.”
“Meh, sounds very Elf-like,” teased Fili.
“Oh, shut it, you,” said Anwynn, smacking him smartly on the hand. But she laughed all the same. This is what felt normal to Fili, teasing Anwynn and laughing. They finished dinner and dessert (a pumpkin pie; one of Anwynn’s favorites) in the same relaxed atmosphere, though nervousness was always at the edge of Fili’s mind.
Once the food was finished and the dishes had been done, they decided to have a cup of tea and relax in the living room. Fili left the actual tea-making to Anwynn (he was still dreadful at it) and went ahead into the living room. He stoked the fire to give off more light (they could use it after how dark dinner was—damn Kili and his “romantic mood lighting” candles; he could hardly see to find his mouth with his fork for the first few minutes), and then settled onto the sofa.
He had to do it now, he told himself. Otherwise he would not do it tonight and he did not think he could live down the taunting from Kili. So Fili sat in silence, going over what he was going to do and say. He forced himself to get ready. He wanted Anwynn for his wife, he was just afraid of what would happen if she said no.
But, really, why would she? Fili was not particularly egotistical (well, maybe a little, perhaps, but he was a Dwarf after all), but she had told him she loved him that day on the way home from the forge. And while they had not been openly courting, they had certainly been more familiar since then. Careful touches on the small of the back, hands on arms, fingers discretely lacing under tables or behind backs, hesitant kisses when they thought no one was looking. If all that was any indication, surely she felt the same way?
Fili jumped a bit when the door opened and Anwynn came in carrying two mugs of tea. She handed him one, smiling, and sat down next to him on the sofa. Fili stared at his mug for a moment before he bit the inside of his lip and went for it. He took her mug from her hands and set them both on the side table, then slid off the sofa to kneel at her feet. He looked up at her face and had to stop himself from laughing, despite his nervousness. She looked absolutely confused. He felt a brief moment of sympathy for her; apparently this had been a very unusual day.
Fili’s hands shook as he took Anwynn’s. He briefly noticed just how small her hands were compared to his; they were the same length, but Anwynn’s were so much more delicate-looking than his blunt and bulky digits. Fili looked into her confused eyes and mustered as much dignity as he could. This had to go better than the first time.
“Anwynn,” he said, fighting his dry mouth, “ever since you came here three years ago, I’ve felt…I don’t know, like I’ve been floating on air. I really cannot remember being this happy, ever. I look forward to waking up every morning and having breakfast with you, going out and spending the day with you, sitting here at night and just talking with you. You have made my life so much better since you stepped through that door and into our home. And I would love nothing more than for you to be my wife. So, Anwynn of Archet, would you do me a great honor and marry me?”
And now he waited. And Mahal, was it a long wait. The seconds seemed to stretch into hours. Anwynn’s face was probably going to be stuck in perpetual befuddlement. Eventually the confusion began to clear, and her expression changed to shock once she realized what exactly he had asked.
“Are…are you serious?” she asked dazedly. Her eyes darted between his two, trying to detect any hint of a joke.
“Yes,” Fili said solemnly, squeezing her hands. “I love you, and I want to marry you and take you for my wife. Will you have me?”
Anwynn was quiet for a few moments longer, and then whispered a very quiet “Yes.”
“What?” asked Fili, hardly daring to believe he had heard it.
“Yes,” she repeated. “Yes, I’ll marry you, Fili! Yes!”
And suddenly she launched herself at Fili and he found himself with an armful of smiling and laughing and crying Anwynn. She wound her arms around his neck and kissed him repeatedly. Fili felt a rising sense of giddiness and joy overtake him and he squeezed Anwynn tight in his arms, letting the reality sink in.
He was going to be married. To his girl, his love. His love. Smaug could keep his damn bloody kingdom for all he cared; Fili had all he wanted right here in his arms.
Fili pulled back just enough to quickly slip something out of his pocket. It was a small mithril ring. It was customary once a woman accepts a marriage proposal to give her a gift, typically jewelry. Silver and gold did not seem to do Anwynn justice, so Fili had looked high and low for something more valuable. There was no mithril to be found in Ered Luin, only gold, silver, and precious gems. However, Thorin still had a very small amount that he had carried with him since the fall of Erebor, and he had allowed Fili to use a bit of it. Fili had taken it and forged it into a tiny ring set with a solitary emerald to give to Anwynn. Now he took the small circle and slid it gently onto her tiny finger. Anwynn stared at it for a moment, then clutched her hand to her heart and threw herself back into his arms.
It was a few hours later when the rest of the family returned home. All of the lights were out except the fire in the hearth, and they could not hear anyone moving around. While Thorin and Dis went to take the leftover food back into the pantry and cold room, Kili walked quietly around, seeing if he could find anyone. Maybe the two lovebirds had gone off for a midnight stroll?
But then he heard soft snores and walked slowly over to the couch, trying not to let his heavy boots make too much noise. On the couch was a sight he was never going to let his brother live down: Fili was laying against the arm of the couch, Anwynn snuggled comfortably into his chest and his arm slung around her waist. Kili was about to yell and wake them up, but then he noticed Anwynn’s hand; on her finger was the little ring Fili had so carefully forged himself.
Fili had done it, and Anwynn had said yes! Kili grinned widely, bursting with pride for his brother. When his mother and uncle came back from the kitchen, Kili motioned them silently over and pointed at his pseudo-sister’s hand. Dis covered her mouth with both hands and then silently clapped them in excitement. She was positively beaming. Even Thorin was smiling fondly down at the pair.
“Finally!” Dis whispered excitedly. “Do you have any idea how long I’ve waited for this to happen? My baby is getting married and I’m finally getting a daughter!”
Kili continued to grin, and Thorin just sighed exasperatedly at his little sister; though he, too, was smiling softly.
“Well we’d best get them to bed,” he said quietly. “After all, we have a wedding to start planning tomorrow.”