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“Nichole, that’s not how a lady sits” the girl’s mother didn’t even look up from her book. It was as if she could simply feel the bad posture.
Nikki tried her best not to groan and sat straight up.
“Feet flat on the floor.”
She shifted her position so that she was no longer sitting on her feet, and they dangled just above the floor.
“Feet flat ON the floor. If they dangle, you’ll just kick your feet like you always do.”
Nikki scooted a bit forward so that her feet could reach the ground. It was taking everything in her power to not just inhale her meal and run off to go play.
But now there was a new problem, her right leg was shaking.
This wasn’t a new problem for Nikki, she used to claim it meant it was happy, but her mom told her that it was disruptive and needed to stop. She made a conscious effort to try and will her leg to stop, but it kept shaking as if dancing to a song no one else could hear.
Her mother simply looked up. That slight, almost unnoticeable motion was enough to make Nikki freeze in place.
“This is a dinner table, not a jungle gym. You can play when you’re finished Nichole.”
“I’m sorry mom…”
“If you’re sorry then fix it.” Nikki nodded and stepped on her right foot with her left. Her feet weren’t flat on the ground, but at least her leg wasn’t shaking.
She hadn’t even touched her food.
It wasn’t that her mom wasn’t a good cook, she was great, but every dinner was an exercise in remembering how to eat. It took years just to get which utensils go on which side of the plate. Nikki didn’t see the point, nor did she understand why you even needed more than one fork. They’re all forks, and she has two perfectly good hands anyway, no utensils needed.
She’d never actually try that though, at least not with her mom right there.
“Nichole, stop picking.” She froze again, she didn’t even realize she had been picking. Looking down, one of the scabs on her arm was bleeding. It wasn’t an uncommon occurrence, Nikki was always playing with or picking at things, be it loose thread, one of her many bandaids, or the wounds they cover. It got especially bad when she was nervous.
“Hey mom? I’m not really super hungry.”
“Put plastic wrap on it and put it in the fridge, we’ll try again later.” This always happened. She was beginning to forget what warm food tasted like. At least not warm food that hadn’t been microwaved only to go back in the fridge without having a bite taken out of it.
–***–
“Camp?” Nikki looked up from the sand box. She wanted to dig for pirate treasure other places but she didn’t get yelled out when she dug here.
“Yes, I was thinking of sending you to a summer camp,” the woman smiled slightly seeing her daughter’s excitement.
“Like outside? In nature?”
“Absolutely. I think it’ll be just what you need.”
“Will it have fun games and adventures?! Can I wrestle bears and befriend wolves and make new friends?”
“You can do… some of those things, yes.”
“Thank-you thank-you THANK-YOU” Nikki jumped up and hugged her mom’s leg. “What’s it’s name? Where’s it at?”
“The sleepy peak area. They’re called the flower scouts.”
–**–
The first week hazing had been bad, but Nikki took it in stride, initiations were always like this on TV. She was tough though and while these girls were… well girly, Nikki wanted to be their friends more than anything. This was her chance to go to camp and make friends and go on adventures with them. She didn’t want to blow this.
The second week was worse, they stopped being friendly all-together. They started calling her things like “weirdo”, “freak”, “disgusting”, they made it a game to get up and move when she’d try to sit with them. What’s worse, they’d give the same treatment to everyone who tried to be nice to her. It wasn’t long before the whole camp avoided her like a plague. She started to feel like that’s what she actually was.
Why wasn’t she normal? If she was, then her mom wouldn’t be so disappointed in her. If she was, these girls would want to be friend. If she was, then she wouldn’t feel so lonely.
The final straw was something simple. She was sitting alone for dinner, like she always did. She didn’t have to worry about eating a certain way, it’s not like using forty forks like her mom told her would suddenly make everyone give her another chance. The food was delicious too, these camp chefs were apparently hired from France. Still, it felt so lonely.
“Ew, she’s peeling her scabs!” Nikki was brought back from her daydreams by the entire mess hall pointing and staring. Some of them even took out phones to take pictures.
“She’s such a fucking freak!”
“Do you think she eats them?”
“Probably, it’s like she’s not even human.”
“She’s probably not, she’s an ugly rat.”
“Eww, what if she has bugs?”
Nikki felt like a trapped animal, which is exactly what they thought she was. She backed a couple paces away from the table before running out of the cafeteria, tears forming in her eyes.
It didn’t take her long to flag down a counselor and ask to use a phone.
“Hello? Residence of doctor-”
“Mom?”
“Nichole? Are you calling from camp?”
“I…” she sniffed, “I wanna go home! I don’t like the flower scouts! They don’t do adventures or even go into the woods! A-and they’re mean and I don’t wanna be a flower scout, I wanna be a Nikki.”
There was a long sigh on the other side, “Are you sure you can’t stick out for a couple months?”
“N-none of them like me, they think I’m we-e-e-eird.” She sobbed, and wiped her nose with her sleeve.
“Sweetie, this wouldn’t happen if you just acted like a lady” Then the realization hit Nikki, she sent her there to try and change her, she wanted her daughter to act like these mean kids.
She took a deep breath and tried to compose herself. “I wanna go home.”
“…are you sure?”
“Mmhm.” She sniffed
“Alright, I’ll be there tomorrow.”
“…okay. I love you.” She was answered with a repeated beeping, indicating her mom had hung up.
–**–
The mess hall was… well a mess. Max had convinced Space kid that the astronauts ate toothpaste and now there’s mint scented vomit all over that table. Nerris, having witnessed that, failed her constitution saving throw and lost her lunch as well. Then David, walking in without a care in the world, slipped on it and ate shit.
Max was basking in the situation he created, trying to get a handle on his hysterical laughter. Neil completely lost his appetite and pushed his tray away. Nikki hadn’t really noticed any of it, she was just scarfing down her food, completely spaced out.
Max snapped in front of her, “Nik, are you even seeing this?”
“Huh what? That’s a lotta barf.”
“Not the barf, well yeah the barf, but I meant David. He nearly fucking faceplanted in it!” Max laughed even harder when he noticed how much Neil was gagging. Nikki smiled more.
“Sorry I was out of it,” she said. “I was eating.”
“How can you eat this shit anyway? It’s not even real food.” He’s right, it couldn’t compare to home cooked meal, and especially not something made by professional chefs. But sitting here in perched frog on Lilly pad position, with her right leg shaking away, between her two best friends who, while flawed, love her for who she is and not despite it… she couldn’t ask for a better dinner.
“I dunno, it’s just good.”
“Whatever Nikki.” That’s right, she wasn’t Nichole, she wasn’t a flower scout. She was Nikki, and she was where she belonged.